₦airaland Forum

shelter4luving: Is like out of all the things in the world increasing, the only thing depreciating is LOVE.
when i was a little girl, there's this picture of men i had in my head. i see them as people that are strong, hardworking, brave and people that can defend and protect women. probably all these qualities was meant to be them ,but today, it's difficult to see men with these attribute. what i see now is, different from what i thought.
1. now some men are confidence and bold to publicly tell people how their wife is the bread winner of the family. i even hear this during testimonies in church. oh sorry to say this. if she's the bread winner, please don't expect total respect all the time.
2. Is like all men now want a working, independent woman. so the woman wouldn't depend on them. forgetting that every woman love to depend on his man even if she have the whole money in the world. if a woman cant depend on you, of what use are you to her?
3. a lot of men can actually lie, pretend to love a rich lady just for the sake of her money or fame. that's why you keep seeing advert: ' i want a sugar mummy who can pay' it's disappointing.
4. most men don't even care nor appreciate how the woman manage her time to take care of the children, and still rush home from work to prepare food for the family. rather they keep going around forming Baddest Boy Ever liveth. chasing other ladies and don't even consider how the woman feels. Mr. man, are you not suppose to protect that woman instead of giving her pains and making her cry?
Men, please what's up with you?
if you continue this way, our little boys wouldn't learn how to be real men.
please arise and be the real man you were created to be.

I like the fact that you stated your opinion and observation carefully.

As far as i Know, there are so many factors responsible for the change.

one of it is change itself
The weight of responsibility,
Expectation,
Emasculation,
Gender clash,...

This battle of the sexes, which actually is a war again men being fostered by feminist...it has helped in changing so many things and which leads to some of the things that you have observed.

We hear sayings like "what(ever) a man can do, a woman can do also a woman can do better"

I mean, who will choose good (man) over better (woman)

my Generalization: The woman's desire to be like the man is obvious and not only can she not be,she'll also get to taste what the man is faced with that makes him seem "powerful" and "proud" but i bet she won't do any better.

Some of the points you raise need more comment than the generalization (i made) above but...
BRB.

RedReact: @OP, kindly stop that saying "Tithing is the power to get wealth". That statement is highly erroneous.

I can't agree more. I wonder why and how people see things the way they do.
Even under the old covenant,the wealth was not tied to tithing. I understand these guys sha,what they want is what they see.
They seem to want God to open the window of heaven and rain them wealth because they tithe.
Na wa o. Merchant christianity.

It's the handy work of the enemy...and to add to it,I suspect Mark. Yes,that Mark you think I am talking about.

Nobleval: so sad..this is what a nairander did.very sad. She deactivated.

I hope that is not another word for suicide

Baby mama: All my blockbuster front page threads just vanished like that

Chai
Someone give me a hanky
This is traumatic

You still have the one of your 5 star threads "Making Love & Raising A Family"
One of the best threads in the section. The souls it will help won't forget.

You're blessed.

melodies: @Pst Olu is his book available in Nigeria?

His books are available.

bluuu: i think anukulapo s viewing it from d side of temptation for d unmarried( u r sharing d goodies in marriage n how sweet it s). anikulapo,c it from d POV of those marriages dt s lacking sexually.it will b helpful to them n dts y its in family section.
i guess dts d demerit of a forum accessible to both mature n immature pple.
im learning from d thread anyways.kip it up y'all

You're welcome. I just have to say and accept that it is inevitable. Keep the good going all the same. Cheers.
@benedicta
I understand and you're right;really. There is time for everything. I do have fun too as evident by my post in other sections on the forum.
It is well. Thanks

Baby mama: But I can't be serious all the time
I love to laugh too,look at this from that angle

I did consider that even if I didn't get to say it earlier. I know that you are human too with all kinds of human nature even the need to laugh and have fun.
...I am just saying that on this forum,I see that your burden (or that which you should bear) is to help build lives as people glean from your counsel. I can tell you that there are many that look up to posts like yours to learn.
There are too many tares being casted here on the forum and unfortunately there are many that will swallow them.
People like you are needed to continue the seed planting so that when the harvest comes and the weed is being separated from the tares, we will still have much harvest.
Have the fun (in real life because you have the right to) but talk less about it (on the forum).
Trying not to say too much. I hope you understand what I'm trying to say.
Thumbs up for you. Keep the good work going.

I love your post that gives counsel better. I think you have a better edge on helping people with more serious issues than discussion fun moments with your girl friends.
This I suppose is responsible for the few endorsement (likes) on the first page except for few posts that are a little away from the theme.
I love you doing the marriage thing among other things you do.
I mean no harm or insult.
Much respect;Cheers.

Vallotti: As a female. . . I HAVE NEVER MET ANY MALE MY AGE MATE THAT IS AS A DEVELOPMENTAL/COGNITIVE EQUAL.
They tend to act 10 or 20 YEARS IN THE DEFICIENCY column emotionally and spirtually-speaking. To put it directly. . . THEY ACT LIKE IJJJIOTS!

As I get older. . . THE GAP WIDENS. . . .
Sooooooooooooooooo I would have to say NO!
It would not work for me. I NEED A 10 YEAR GAP!!!! So, I CAN HAVE SOME TIME AND PATIENCE WITH HIS AZZZZZZZZZZZE THAT REFUSES TO GROW UP!!!

I need a man. . . not a boy!

SHE WILL OUTGROW YOU IN ABOUT 5 YEARS. . . .AND LOOK LIKE YOUR MOTHER IF SHE AGES LIKE MOST NIGERIAN OR NAIRALAND WOMEN!!!!

Age does not usually correlate with maturity. . . BUT IN MY DEALINGS WITH NIGERIAN MAN. . . .

THE BIGGER THE SHOE SIZE. . . THE SMALLER THE BRAIN!

OP. . . goodluck!

OP,A woman with this kind of mindset is the one you need to avoid like a plague. Whether you are older or younger,you'll be on her worse list of man.

kmcutez: @op, you do not love this lady, please let her go. Ask yourself, tomorrow if she

A) becomes blind
B) loses both legs
C) loses both arms
D) gets burns over 50% of her body

etc, would you still marry her? This is just a tip of the iceberg, as I know most naija guys are into physical appearances, hence those questions.

How did you reach such conclusion that he does not love her?
How would you answer these questions if you were asked?

If tomorrow your husband
A) becomes blind
B) loses both legs
C) loses both arms
D) gets burns over 50% of his body

etc, would you still marry and love him?
If you say yes to all,how do you convince us that things won't change?

Destiny27: My fears

If how she will look after she drops 2 is your fear,you are not ready.
Have you ever though about how you will look? OR have you gotten a covenant with God that you'll look 16 till you die?
You have been entrapped by erroneous teachings of feeble minds to think that you are spared of physical defects that will be worse than a woman after 2 kids.
Take your eyes off the container and look into the content. Go for your love

Goshen360: CAPITAL. ....YES!!!

*** question about eternal life ***
"And a certain ruler asked him, saying, Good Master, what shall I do to inherit eternal life? And Jesus said unto him, Why callest thou me good? none is good, save one, that is, God. " (Luke 18:18-19).

*** a reference to the law of Moses by Jesus***

"Thou knowest the commandments, Do not commit adultery, Do not kill, Do not steal, Do not bear false witness, Honour thy father and thy mother. And he said, All these have I kept from my youth up." (Luke 18:20-21).

The law was a way to salvation (for those that can fulfil it. The problem is not with the law for the law was capable of giving eternal life if you can fulfil its requirement. The problem is that people were unable to fulfil it because they ware not empowered--"But ye shall receive power, after that the Holy Ghost is come upon you..." (Acts 1:

***Now that "the" way is around and open,Jesus offered the excellent way***
"Now when Jesus heard these things, he said unto him, Yet lackest thou one thing: sell all that thou hast, and distribute unto the poor, and thou shalt have treasure in heaven: and come, follow me. And when he heard this, he was very sorrowful: for he was very rich." (Luke 18:22-23).


####See also Luke 10: 25 - 29####
So bro,"Wherefore the law is holy, and the commandment holy, and just, and good." (Romans 7:12).

There is nothing wrong with the law but with man. "For we know that the law is spiritual: but I am carnal, sold under sin." (Romans 7:14).

The reason God had to do away with the law and not do away with man is that man is the subject matter and not the law. God didn't create man so that he can glorify the law, he created the law to save man. So,the law can be changed for all he cares just to save his precious creations.

Goshen360: The law, the 10 Commandments inclusive require...no hope of salvation, and no hope of heaven.

Really?

shdemidemi: I am not in your mind, won't like to assume else I cld be wrong. The question was not directed to me, I will leave it for who it was directed.

Well,I am disappointed that you couldn't see clearly yet I am not surprised. Anyways,it's okay. Just leave it to be answered by the person addressed to. Thanks.

shdemidemi: Now, you seem to get the drift. Anywhere the Spirit of The Lord is there is liberty. No one made it a law for Christians to meet on Sunday, if Thursday is alright by the church, they can as well gather on Thursday. All in all, your comparison between a fact that God never instructed us(Christians) to tithe and why we chose to come together on Sunday even though we were not instructed to do so by God holds no water.

I can't help you out here. Your point lines behind mine (never mind if you still don't understand)

shdemidemi: I believe he asked a valid question. Meanwhile, na only Sunday you dey worship ni?

I'm sure you know what I am talking about so you can go ahead and answer the question if you want to.

Did the people (under the mosaic law) worship God only on sabbath (Saturday) day?

Zikkyy: so Jesus been around before? and for the purpose of collecting tithe?

And if He came to collect tithe among other things (Melchizedeck did during his interaction with Abraham), would you sue him or accuse him?

Do you also think he didn't die for our sins but to show us how to live a life of love?

trustman: But they still need to show if God commanded or instructed them, as Christians, to do it that way.

Which command you dey wait for?
Were we commanded or instructed by our Lord or the disciples to worship on sunday instead of saturday?

@Bidam
Okay,...for the people I quoted,if those words don't really represent their stands,then it is rather unfortunate.
You might not be able to do much to change their belief.

Bidam: You are actually wrong.Theses folks are against everything called tithes,whether it is mosaic or not as far as na tithes,dem go fight am.

@ Bidam: For your record. Read these quotes and see what you can make of it. Cheers.

Zikkyy: why request that i provide scripture that says "do not pay tithe" when i don't belong to that group that says people should not tithe.

So please do you have scriptures that supports the saying "the priesthood of Jesus receives tithe"?

Zikkyy: am indifferent. Its your money.

am only against the teaching (based on mosaic law).

Goshen360: ^ You seems not to understand this thing we have been saying yet. Yes, the Abraham example predates the law but the Abraham example is not a law for Christians. Preachers make it a law for Christians by citing Abraham example and\but backing it with Malachi curse while they also lift law tithing scripture to support Abraham tithing.

If you're a truly gonna use Abraham example of tithing as a pre-law tithing, nothing should be drawn from the law tithing and no curses should be added, it should be a free-will thing because Abraham was not threatened with devourer and curses for him to do that, it was a freewill not a law because the law of tithing doesn't exist then.

Bidam: And i never told you i practiced the mosaic tithing anyway so why not stick to the issue of argument,rather than throwing false accusations and childish tantrums.

Bidam, You have been webbed into the mosaic law argument as regards the discussions obviously.
If your tithing position is not in the mosaic "law",I advice you stop responding to comments about mosaic tithe (agric produce, farm produce, eat your tithe..., give the levites...sell them and bring the money to jerusalem...and the related points).

**Gosh is against tithe as a "law" and the threat of malachi curses.**

**Zikky is indifferent about tithe saying "the money is yours,do what you want with it; EVEN IF YOU CHOOSE TO TITHE (emphasis is mine)**
...And others,have similar opinion but that it is not a "law" or "requirement"

So they seem not to be against tithing (except they reaffirm their stand again if I'm mistaking)

Zikkyy: am indifferent.

Ok then. EOD

Zikkyy: Its your money.

Sounds like the popular response to the mas.urba.ion question "...it's your body,God has nothing to do with it" LOL

Zikkyy: am only against the teaching (based on mosaic law).

Then we are on the same course. I do not teach it nor support it with the mosaic law.

Zikkyy: why request that i provide scripture that says "do not pay tithe" when i don't belong to that group that says people should not tithe.

So please do you have scriptures that supports the saying "the priesthood of Jesus receives tithe"?

Ok. I'll proceed to scriptural reference after a satisfactory straight answer to the question below.

What is your position on tithing?
A) anti christian tithing
B) pro christian tithing
C) ______________________

Zikkyy: Do you have scripture for this?

Yes,if you have a scripture that says "do not pay tithe"

Goshen360: ^ You seems not to understand this thing we have been saying yet. Yes, the Abraham example predates the law but the Abraham example is not a law for Christians. Preachers make it a law for Christians by citing Abraham example and\but backing it with Malachi curse while they also lift law tithing scripture to support Abraham tithing.

If you're a truly gonna use Abraham example of tithing as a pre-law tithing, nothing should be drawn from the law tithing and no curses should be added, it should be a free-will thing because Abraham was not threatened with devourer and curses for him to do that, it was a freewill not a law because the law of tithing doesn't exist then.

Yes,we are on the same page. I've always said that Abraham's tithing is not a "law"...he was never required to pay it,twas a freewill,honour offering to Melchizedeck.

The preachers making a law out of it and threatening people with curses are on their own and like apostle Peter said, "their damnation slumberth not"

What I know for sure is that the priesthood of Jesus receives tithe contrary to the belief because the mosaic law is lifted off the people, tithe is scraped is not true

Zikkyy: Bidam which tithe law predates levitical priesthood can you provide scriptures to show there was a tithe law pre-moses?

True, tithe was not a law (requirement) pre-moses but the act of tithing predates the law of course. Since Abraham is pre-levitical law...

Zikkyy: You say gospel is preached free of charge, then you say "the tithe pays...." please make up ya mind; its either the gospel is free or its sold

Even in the Levitical priesthood that got tithe instead of land inheritance,was it said they charged the people "tithe" as payment for their services (teaching of the law for example)?

@Bidam
Ok. Maybe I don't really understand your viewpoint from your post or maybe it's you that didn't get my question from the opening post and subsequent ones.

However,something is not aligning.

My concern is about teachings that may be nice but not necessarily an absolute truth. The consequence of that is that it may become a burden on people.
In a bid to present God as whatever we wish to portray him,we may begin to make more "doctrines of men" -- forbidding to marry, commanding to abstain from meat, anger is a sin....things that the scripture did not affirm.

So,that is why I called for insights that we examine the J.O.Y. concept. Given that "joy" is a desired virtue and if according to the scriptures (let me quote the message translation) there is equality, then JOY (Jesus,others and yourself) and JYO (Jesus,Yourself and others) should be the same and should be taught so.
*** *** ***
"No, you’re SHOULDER TO SHOULDER with them all the way, your surplus matching their deficit, their surplus matching your deficit. In the end you come out EVEN"
*** *** ***

Do you understand it this way?

Bidam: sorry about the late response.I thought i had replied this post.

It's ok then. Good to hear from you.

Bidam: The truth is the corinthians were a carnal bunch,Paul called them his children who he travailed for until Christ be formed in them.

They had passion to give when the zeal for the things of God was there from the beginning.They were selfless but later began to wax cold in their commitments to God and the things of God. The context of the verse you quoted was concerning Giving.Paul rightly said you cannot give what you don't have...in another verse he rebuked them because he robbed other churches by receiving support from them to serve the corinthian folks.

Paul was encouraging them to grow in maturity so they can be able to progessively come to the realisation that selfless sacrifice is the ultimate desire every believers should attain to.

Spirituality is in stages and for now paul tells them to bear one anothers burden so as to fulfill the law of Christ which is Love.

Ok...But regardless of the circumstance surrounding his admonition,I see Paul pointing to 2 operational words of concern in the scripture I quoted;ye 3 that we should take not of (make me sef borrow kjv english )...take note of capitalized words/phrases below.
*** *** ***
"For I mean not that OTHER MEN be eased, and YE burdened: But by an EQUALITY that now at this time your abundance may be a
supply for their want, that their abundance
also may be a supply for your want: that
there may be EQUALITY:"
*** *** ***

Bidam: You are right,but the ONCE SAVED ALWAYS SAVED faction will disagree with you here.

They will quote scriptures like we being eternally sealed with the Holy Spirit.

Well,they have a right to their opinion.
Back to JOY concept. How do you read this?
*** *** *** *** ***
"For I mean not that other men be eased, and ye burdened: But by an equality, that now at this time your abundance may be a supply for their want, that their abundance also may be a supply for your want: that there may be equality:" (2 Corinthians 8:13-14).

Bidam: It's related to the parable of the virgins...The 10 virgins had oil, which is a symbol of the Holy spirit.Can someone lose the Holy spirit?

As the parable rightly points out,YES. There are other indications in the scripture also.

"And she said, The Philistines be upon thee, Samson. And he awoke out of his sleep, and said, I will go out as at other times before, and shake myself. And he wist not that the LORD was departed from him." (Judges 16:20).
************
"Cast me not away from thy presence; and take not thy holy spirit from me." (Psalm 51:11).
************
"Quench not the Spirit." (1 Thessalonians 5:19).

trustman: So you admit here that some aspects of the Law were abolished. Right?

Are you hereby saying that "SOME" aspects of the "law" (whatever it comprise of) were abolished and not all of the "law"?

Can you briefly share which of it was abolished?

Thanks