₦airaland Forum

PinkStarsFallIn:
I wish to Lock 6M naira to compound for atleast 5years. Should I do piggy vest or what?

your best option is to do it annually, do safelock upfront on piggyvest and compound every year, that will give you 20% extra by first year and by 2031 you should already have over 10m. But my candid advice lock 4m, set aside 1m and start a digital startup that can x10 or even 100 leveraging on real time problems that people don't mind spending money on, something that you can get investors or accelerators to fund. If you want more details chat me up on 08089456258

Flipmac:
I'm not building in Lagos or Abuja. I'm building in my village in Anambra, so I think it should be cheaper.

it's not about location but quality, if you want something ordinary then go for a mason

Flipmac:
I contacted a building engineer to supervise a one storey building project. It's actually a small building: it'll be 3 bedrooms, sitting room, and kitchen.

He is asking for N20k daily pay for supervision. Which will be over N1.2million by completion. Mind you, this is in my village in Anambra state.

My question is, does it make sense? How much in total should I budget to pay an engineer to supervise a small one storey building project?

Pay him his 20k per day or employ an incompetent fellow to do the job and pay like 10k and get a chaotic job that you will need to keep fixing

FengChui:
Bro, anywhere banditry thrives, there is an insider from the area giving the bandits information.
A group of thieves can't just come to an area they don't know, they can't speak their language and start operations. There is always an inside man.

always the greedy insider

Odingo1:
I told her that and that was what provoked her and she insisted I must pay it and she goes physical look for kitchen knife and going physical. She had been begging but i still confused.

keep your stance but ask her why, does she want you dead. scold her bad behaviour but also forgive her and pick out a paper to show her your plans, tell her it's in your plan for you both to move into a better environment but we can't achieve that if we are not creating a system for that. Ladies are moved by pictures you paint,

Stay calm and tell her it's okay as long as she is going to provide the money. Tell her we are going to stay her one or two years more and stop behaving like a kid but stay cautious

Alphiegabe:
Survey availability has been very few this holiday season for me I am hoping thinks pick up by this week please am I the only one or anyone else can confirm

what do you need survey for?

TokunboCarsOnly:
There is no point being so pained and bitter about this. Normally, what is Yoruba attire doing in their traditional wedding in the first place. This is something am sure you will never allow in Yoruba land. Anyways, sorry, the king have already made his decision

thoughtful

Nigerianlion:
Interesting move by the Obi of Issele‑Uku to preserve local tradition. While promoting akwa‑ọcha as the authentic attire for Enuani weddings shows cultural pride and preservation, it’s also important to encourage respect and unity among Nigeria’s diverse ethnic groups. Cultural expression should uplift traditions without creating unnecessary division — celebrating what makes each group unique while still showing mutual respect.

thanks God it's not isiagwu that was introduced by the British

Ezeama400:
https://www.facebook.com/share/17t7hiPQWf/

It’s a welcome development .

At least it not isiagwu which is a product of colonialism, even all the wears the king is putting on are foreign inclined. If he want to really follow tradition na leaves dem suppose use as that was what was available until western influence

koladata:
Venezuela oil is not good , for those who keeps shouting it's because of the oil . They have one of the worse oil and the largest reserve in the world . If the oil is so good they won't be selling drugs

US damaged the oil through sanctions

Biafra could have been easily achieved if Kanu went about it the way it's done globally from the beginning but as it is it's almost impossible now

Emmabyte:
How can I continue to share same country with this kind of a person

one of my mentors call them animals

Btruth:
Baba Oyedepo pikin? 🤔...... Let's wait and see.

no, Oyedepo, Oyeyipo, Oladepo are common names among Igbominas there are lots of persons bearing that name among us, perhaps Bishop Oyedepo is the most popular among them

Wotowotoman:
I can bet anything say na him get the so called Ma’am Energy!

oshey, ma'am go dey owned by offshore company in somewhere like BVI or Cayman Islands

Aleister:
Omo …the guy’s waist must have turbocharger

no normally they don't achieve that through sex but through semen clinical donation

omooba969:
How sure are we that all the children are his?

Yeye dey smell. 😒

you don't trust them, he will donate his semen and carry out tests on every child

Hope you will pay before delivery or you will come pick it up by yourself

maasoap:
This man is highly corrupt, just like Diezani and many others

it's actually deeper than it is they are just reducing the rate. I believe the guy was taking bribes from those who served under Jonathan who were found wanted for corruption

Spiritual protection marks

Train don go you still dey Wait for am, look for another one na

Every year produces it's special words, for me 2025 is Nepo Baby (the usual Nepotism Baby)

Oyinbogyal:
I’m mixed and living abroad. My mother is European and my father is Nigerian. My parents separated over 10 years ago, but they never officially divorced — they were legally separated.

The separation happened because my father did something very serious to my mother. In Europe, you cannot be removed from the family home simply because of marital problems. A married person is only forced out by the courts if something very severe happens. That is all I can say for privacy reasons, but it’s important context.

About a year after they separated, my father started begging my mother to take him back. This wasn’t occasional — it went on for years. At the same time, he was involved with a Nigerian woman from his own tribe. Behind that Nigerian woman’s back, he was still pressuring my mother to reconcile. My mum refused, but he never stopped trying.

Fast-forward to December 2025. Even this year, my father again went to my mother and asked her to get back together with him.

Then on Christmas Day, he finally admitted — not to me, not to my mother, not to all of us directly — but to my youngest sister, that he has a 9-year-old son he has been hiding from everyone. He then made my sister pass the message on to the rest of us. He could not say it to our faces himself.

What shocked me most is that this child was born about a two years after my parents separated — meaning that all the years my father was begging my mother to reconcile, he already knew he had a child elsewhere. He deliberately never told her… bear in mind this child lives in the same country as us in Europe but he is just been hidden.

When I called him to confront him, he confirmed everything. He also said something that disturbed me deeply: that he feels no real affection for the child and that the boy will never replace his “real family,” meaning us. Hearing a man speak that way about his own biological child was horrifying.

This is a fully Nigerian boy, same tribe as my father. Knowing my father’s own childhood — where he suffered badly under a cruel stepmother — I would have thought he might see himself in that child. But instead, he has completely compartmentalised him.

Meanwhile, the child’s mother still wants to marry my father. From what I can see, he continues to keep her hopeful without fully committing, while still fantasising about getting back with his legal “European wife” who doesn’t want him. He seems to keep multiple realities open at once.

What made everything click for my mother — and for me — is this:
If my mother had agreed to reconcile, my father could have moved back into the house legally as her husband. Because he would not repeat physical violence, she would have had no immediate way to remove him again via legal system/court. Only after securing his place back in the home could he then reveal that he had a child all along — effectively trapping her in a marriage built on deception.

That realisation is terrifying.

I also feel deep cultural dissonance. I told my father plainly: my mother is European. This kind of secrecy is not culturally acceptable where we live. It’s not “family affairs” or something to be normalised. Trust matters differently. Consent matters differently. So he cannot assume my mother will want him after hearing the news, she is not like the Nigerian ex you had a child with - in Nigeria it is normal for a woman to beg or wait for a man to marry you, in Europe it is shameful so he needs to stop thinking my mom will accept this.

This entire situation has destroyed my respect for him. I don’t feel anger as much as disgust and shame. I’m embarrassed to even explain this to my European friends. I feel like I’ve lost faith not just in him, but in my ability to trust what I thought were shared values.

I’m now engaged to marry a loving European man, and if I’m honest, this experience has made me afraid. Afraid of repeating cycles if I marry a Nigerian man. Afraid of normalising things I don’t believe in. I don’t reject my Nigerian heritage — I love the food, the music, the culture — but when it comes to marriage, honesty, and responsibility, I feel completely disconnected from what I’ve seen modeled.

Right now, I don’t even want to be around my father. I feel like something fundamental has collapsed, and I don’t know how to rebuild respect where trust no longer exists.

I’m sharing this here because I genuinely don’t know how to process it alone, and I want perspectives — especially from people who understand Nigerian family dynamics — without judgement.

You have no issues that warrant fears, just find time to keep reassuring and telling yourself if people before a mirror. I am different, I won't hurt my spouse, I am healed, I am whole and well. I will make my home peaceful and exciting, I heal from every pains within me. Do that daily for like 90 days and see the effects, meanwhile its good you know the flaws of your dad, look out for that of your mum too and check which of their weaknesses you have and tell yourself you will be the opposite of all of that, then start working on becoming them

Zaynab you to do jare, very soon Naija baddies will start asking you to arrange masterclasses on How to be Archeologists of rare persons

Kobojunkie:
Nonsense! Why should it be the wife's responsibility to police a grown- arsed man's emotions for him? If a man emotionally disconnects from his marriage, it should be his responsibility to detect and immediately correct himself.

Abeg normalize divorce and stop pretending men are adult children women need to take care of in marriage...the same marriage these men are supposedly leaders/heads of. No wonder sex goes out the door after a while with women eventually realizing their husbands are no different from their own children in that they too need raising.😩😩😩😩

Normalize divorce make women freely exit such relationships. A grown man still unable to do the basic inner work required of all adult humans needs a mother and not a wife and no woman's child should be burdened with such nonsense. 😩😩😩

You don come with your confused mind again

Your cultural and religious background is already fighting your future marriage, let me advise you look for another lady who is a Muslim, because when you marry anyone you marry their family too.

Nchoje34:
Arresting this man may virtually bring an end to insecurity in our country. Gumi had undeniably proven himself to be an unflinching sympathizer of herdsmen.

This country is a complete mess

He is continuing from where his dad stopped obviously

Jerryblaq:
This guy is one of the major sponsors of banditry in our country.
What baffles me the most is his aura of confidence and composure in airing his myopic stance. This guy is literally walking free while nnamdi kanu is behind bars in sokoto.

Nigeria is completely bleeped

one day some months ago I was about waking up and I heard a strange voice saying the day Gumi is arrested and detained Banditry will end in Nigeria

Kcash200:
Hi guys,

I have a problem i have been dealing with since i was 12. I am from a large family and when i was 12, my mum told me my Dad is not my biological father and for me to make it a secret. I did not know what to do with such an information at that age but i knew it was wrong but i couldnt talk so i am not the one who destroys the family. Everyone lives in peace but i always wonder what will happen if only they know the truth. My biological father has other children and some of them know me that i am outside. He was involved in my life financially from 12years as far as i am aware of. He sent me money then and i kept quiet too and also supported me financially a couple of times though we have no personal relationship asides 2-3mins phone calls here and there and it is been like that for years.

I know my biological father and we kept in touch while i was in secondary school. Now that i am an adult now, i feel really sad about the whole thing and sometimes i even cry on my bed. I have been living in secret and a double life and fearing i might be outed one day. Some people in my mother's family are aware which is very strange and i find it shameful as a man now but i did not choose my fate. I have always tried to forget it and just leave my life but it is always just there especially when i think about starting my own family. I am striving hard for it not to define the way i see marriage and life as i am trying to write a different story for myself.

I grew up with my father who is not my biological father and i have been a good son to him as well and still taking care of him but it bothers that my whole life is a lie and it is hard knowing what i know and i can't say anything as that will scatter the family. I met some girls from a very good home who i can marry but i am scared if i tell her or other girls, that her parent will not let me marry her with that secret.

I am scared of getting married publicly as someone can take the news to my biological father as i do not intend to invite him as my biological father but i always feel heavy anytime i think about it. I want to start a new life for myself but i don't know how to handle this. I do not plan to tell my father as he is getting old and this can kill him at his old age as he has been through a lot in life. He is finally enjoying and i am taking care of him very well and he prays for me all the time.

I am building a good life for myself as a professional and have a lot of girls around me but i don't know what to do. Should i keep quiet and tell the girl i marry after marriage ? Isn't that me building my marriage on deceit. It is a shameful thing to talk about if you look at it.

Sometimes, i feel like they caused me trauma putting me in this position but i am an adult now and will bear responsibility for how i live my life and cant continue to blame any trauma or anyone. I am the one who has to keep quiet for peace to reign in the family.

I don't want to wait too long just incase it is a dealbreaker for someone but i also don't want to be disclosing to anyone.

Aside from marriage, i still do not know what to do with that information.

My advice to you, be a wise son. know that you have two Father's, your biological father and the father who raised you, go visit your biological father and tell him you have a secret plan for marriage but you have to inform him first. The first will be that you will be having two versions of wedding the first will be for the father who raised you while the second will be for him (as honour psych him to believe that the last is for the best, even though you know it is for peace to reign). Ensure that you tell the lady you will be marrying that you have lots of men who are like father's to you but there are two that are so dearly to you and as it you will be having two weddings and you will be meeting both of them alongside with her. Discuss it with your mum too so that she won't spoil things.

If not for how we have lost lots of our cultural heritage, in Yoruba land your father is not your only father.

Be smart and move to the next stage of your life.

dreh17:
Rice rice Rice. Stomach infrastructure

that is what most Nigerians need

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Pootle:
this one always looking for cheap validation.

na apkabio wey toast you i blame.

she has been doing that for decades even before going to the senate