₦airaland Forum

DeepSight:
And I hereby conjure you to follow me into my dark and infernal kingdom, there to fellowship with elves, goblins and nature sprites and denounce all religion forever

I rebuke you in the name of Jesus!

marlow1962:
Pretend like you didn't know/hear anything, collect the money, rent your shop and be useful to yourself.

If you begin drag, two things go happen
1- either you pack comot go your papa house
Or
2- the said side chick go come join you as second wife.

The choice is yours, but trust women to act low and cry foul.

Read this again.

Does it make sense to you?

pocohantas:
These are the kind of questions Nigerian men ask their (future) wives. Scenarios that bother on endurance and humiliation rituals.

Never if your husband gives you N10m, what will you invest in.

Or if your husband becomes a president, how will you manage the transition.

At least the OP has graduated to giving his wife money. It is not 'if your husband asks you to fund his side chic's business, what will you do'.

Awon radarada.

France seems to be on fire this year.

DeepSight:
The Bible is a collection of books and letters, poems and fantasies written by ancient men in a different era and there is much there that is certainly not to be applied to any sane modern life.

Ha! It's clear now.

You don't believe in the Bible.

Not a problem 👌

DeepSight:
There is something wrong with the teaching of submission in the first place. A marriage should be a partnership of equal respect. Both parties to love and respect one another and decisions should be made in joint thinking. The concept of one party bowing down to the other in submission is a relic of the past and should be done away with.

If the Bible is followed to the T, submission in the Bible is not a 'hard' concept. In fact, few verses before their favourite verse tells us to submit one to another.

School 1 says that verse is talking to the church as in all believers should submit one to another.

School 2 says it is in marriage then explains that wives submit whilst husbands love their wives. The love expected is defined in 1 Cor 13: 4 - 7 which if practiced 70% will create heaven for the wife.

However, 85% (I am feeling generous tomorrow) of professing 'Christian' husbands either have no encounter with Christ, lack love or are very legalistic or all three. Then combine with a version of Church teachings (worldwide) desperate to produce terrible husbands.

Interestingly, a number of churches teach suffering and endurance (of a wife) as a virtue that will be rewarded. How else will the wife be made virtuous if it isn't by producing demonic husbands?

In addition, the church keep feminizing biblical virtues. Someone who hasn't read the Bible would think only women or wives are expected to have certain virtues. Peace, patience, long suffering, self control, tolerance, joy, etc. are fruits of the Holy Spirit that are gender neutral; emotional intelligence.... same. Any virtues you know the church has attributed to women/wives, 99.999999% of them are gender neutral and expected from both parties.

Personally, I think the church should leave marriage teaching and counselling alone. A young woman or man whose only exposure is the church might never see or experience true love in their lifetime.

APOPTOSIS:
SimpLe
I have always sounded this here.
I preach this everyday.
Marriage is not for everyone.
It's no crime to stay alone. Keep of men!
If you can't take shittttt please avoid MEN.

@ bold: you don't say

pocohantas:
If the best way to control a man is be humble to him, why are men not being humble to me. So they can control me that way too? 😂

They are from Mars so it works the opposite with them

Northernblood8:
Women should know that the best way to actually control a man is to be humble to him.

Women are not obsessed with control, men are.

chicfarmer:

Omo.. see the abomination wey I dey hear

Like the abomination that happens in Nigeria.

Why are we seeing your boobs and nipples on display?

Happy wedding anniversary.

The husband's face in the anniversary picture is very unflattering why are we seeing it?

Condolences to her parents especially her mother

I don't put stock in Karma; brother Gozie can marry tomorrow and have five lovely children, fine wife and thriving business.

In this unfair life everyone should guide themselves so they don't become playground for their enemies.

thorpido:
Chai.....
I know a lady who had about 3 abortions for a guy.She conceived again and the guy told her to abort it too.She ran to the guy's mother to report.
The guy had no choice but to marry her.

Foolish girl!

Instead of her to be a single mom and move on, she is tying herself to a man who doesn't want her.

The one that treated his woman like diamond dey do choko after marriage, how much more the one that never wanted you from the start?

Any man that encourages you to abort doesn't like you. Let's leave love aside.

You aborted for a man the first time and out of fear/concern for you didn't hold body, insist on condoms, or hustle harder to close the marriage.

Anyways, she will soon start 'Dear Joro'.

Killermamba:
I once worked in one of the leading milk manufacturers in Nigeria, most of those milk are expired or the seal was broken during transportation, they keep it one side to be sold to farmers for their animals, but at the end abokis and market women comes to buy them to resell as measured milk. Those abokis that make noodles and teas is what they use to serve you ooo. It's not healthy

The average Nigerian is black hearted.

Watch people defend this because of 'poverty'.

Wickedfacts:
This one will still produce bandits. E no fit avoid am.

I sincerely hope a miracle happens along the way.

Unfortunately, children cannot choose their parents.

The innocent children do not need to pay for the foolishness of their parents.

Food4Thought:
The milk is called Tinubu hardship milk and people have been buying and consuming it since Tinubu turned Nigeria to headquarters of sufferings and it hasn't been reported that anyone has died as a result of consuming it.
In conclusion,it is safe for your family consumption.

Na wa!

Is this poverty induced foolishness or follow come?

So because 'nobody has died (agba tracker) in the last two years' means it is safe?

It is well.

This OP is either rage baiting us or acting out generational bad decisions in real time.

It is well with his children.

jetguy:
DON'T EVER JUDGE ANYONE UNTIL YOU FIND YOURSELF IN HIS/HER PREDICAMENT

Do I need to blame them, no...

Our leaders is a weapons fashion against the masses Bible talked about 🤔 imagine the kind of hunger in the land...
Me that have been praying for God to take my life since last week, but he refused, money for food, for where, even money for sniper, for where. Just that I don't have mind to enter express make motor clear me for once 🔂

And you think, if they come to my area, I wouldn't join them and collect abi...

Na God almighty go judge all of them that turned this country to hellfire for some of us 🙏

I hope the noodles and tin tomatoes will last till eternity or 2030 at the end of his tenure.

AnotherAlien:
Who knows if shes one of the bitter old cargoes that sent the man to jail in the first place? Very bitter bunch. One of them was still begging pastors fir a husband not too long ago. To do what with him? Mess his life up too.

Very bitter soul posted that nonsense. Wetin the man do am? Why be sad about what hes happy about? May God guide us to avoid certain types of peopld knowing anything about us. Haba.

Sending a man to jail because he sexually assaulted a minor is bitterness?

I reckon goodness and sweetness to you is allowing men free rein to ruin women.

Menclothing1:
The fashion designer is good woman congratulations

Why is she a good woman?

Because she stooped to marry an divorced child molester and ex-convict.

She is really good

franchasng:
I think you are right that they were playing France with respect as per their colonial master.




You know France have fast-paced players that have been trained for counter attack and shooting outside box eighteen and you de go front anyhow instead of standing gidigba for your defense line and using Mane to instill fear in them to keep them in check and reduce their pressure at your own side

@bold:

It is well.

What a shame.

With shameless visionless leaders like these, who needs shackles round their neck?

EvangelistChuks:
Some women are never ever supposed to enter into marriage.
Woke culture will say otherwise but the Good Book said a wife,I reiterate a wife has nothing outside the husband.
[As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything-Ephesians 5:24].

Interesting15:
Wisdom For Destiny Daily Devotional *(29th May 2026)*

by Sunday-Akanni M.

TOPIC: Sweet Marriage Is Still God's Will (1)

Scripture:
"And the Lord God said, 'It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.'" Genesis 2:18

*Message*

There is a quiet but dangerous narrative spreading through our generation that paints marriage as a burden to be endured rather than a blessing to be enjoyed. It is told in the stories of broken homes, bitter divorces, and disillusioned spouses. It is whispered in the cynicism of those who have been wounded and in the hesitation of young people who are afraid to commit. And sadly, even within the Church, many believers have come to associate marriage more with sacrifice and suffering than with sweetness and joy.

But today, and in the days ahead, we must return to the original blueprint. We must hear again what God said and is still saying; not what culture has said, not what disappointment has said, not what fear has said. It is important to remind ourselves of what God Himself declared at the very dawn of creation, that "it is not good for man to be alone."

The setting of this declaration was Eden, a place of absolute perfection. Sin had not yet entered, the ground was uncontaminated, and even the air was pure. Adam walked in unbroken fellowship with God, enjoyed paradise in full measure, and bore an extraordinary mandate over all of creation. And yet, in the middle of all that perfection, God looked at Adam and said something was not good.

This tells us that marriage was not invented as a remedy for a broken world. On the other hand, it was conceived in a perfect one. It did not originate from human loneliness alone, or social necessity, even or biological instinct. Rather, it was a divine idea, born in the heart of God before the fall, before pain emerged, and before any shadow of dysfunction was experienced. From the very beginning, God's design was companionship, completion, and covenant, and He called it very good (Genesis 1:31).

The sweetness you long for in marriage is not a fairy tale. It is not naive romanticism or the exclusive territory of a lucky few. It is the original factory setting that God built into the institution from the beginning. When God made Eve and brought her to Adam, the man burst into poetry, "This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh" (Genesis 2:23). That spontaneous song was not performance but was the sound of a soul recognising its complement. It was the first expression of marital joy, and it was God Himself who authored it.

Yes, the fall introduced thorns into the soil of marriage, such as conflict, pain, miscommunication, and selfishness. But the cross of Christ came to redeem what the fall corrupted. The same grace that restores our relationship with God is available to restore and sweeten our marriages. The new covenant does not merely manage marital dysfunction but can genuinely transform it.

Dear reader, sweet marriage is not a relic of Eden that was lost forever. By the power of the Holy Spirit, it is accessible to every couple who will build on God's original design. Therefore, do not let the noise of broken marriages around you define what is possible for yours. Let God's Word define it.

The sweetness is still there. It was always His will.

*Prayers/Confessions*

Lord, I thank You that marriage was Your idea, born not in brokenness but in beauty. Forgive me for every cynical thought I have entertained about the marriage institution. Please Lord, renew my hope and my vision today. I declare that my marriage is redeemable, refineable, and capable of reflecting Your glory. Let the sweetness You designed for marriage be my lived experience and not just a distant dream. Teach me and my spouse to build on Your original blueprint, and let Eden's joy be the testimony of our home. In Jesus' name, Amen.

*Further Reading*
Genesis 1:31; Genesis 2:18-25; Song of Solomon 1:2-4; Proverbs 18:22; Ecclesiastes 9:9; John 2:1-11; Hebrews 13:4

*1-year Bible Reading Plan*
1 Chronicles 23-25; John 12:1-26

@bold:

The Church is chief in the narrative that marriage is suffering and endurance for a wife that's why they breed & tolerate unfit husbands.

Infact, the above is foundational doctrine for some churches hence divorce even in the midst of threat to life is frowned upon.

Marriage is really what the couple make of it.

peleson1:
Women !!!
Women!!
Women!!!?


Stop being a detective , you will only end up destroying your marriage

Remove eyes and vomit eyes


Your husband is only trying to make sure he satisfies you in bed

Leave that thing alone and enjoy your sex life with him .


That may just be and enhancer to satisfy you

Does this make sense to you?

eniolorunfe:
Givers!!! If you know you’re naturally a giver or your default personality is to be a giver, always check for reciprocity in any relationship you find yourself. One sided relationships cannot last, no be curse! There is no way the giver will not eventually be drained, especially when you are surrounded by takers or a taker as it seems in this case.

What happens most times is that because you have or you love to give, you’re likely to attract mostly takers and, because that is “you” , you wouldn’t mind but last last e dey cast!!!

From the little I have read, the man seems to be mostly a taker. You did papers/visa, you’re bringing in more money even paying bills including his at times etc etc.

You need to rethink this your decision especially if you don’t have kids yet, because I doubt if he will change; na to dey manage am o.

Givers form alliances with Givers!!! Be intentional about this, if you no wan cry last last. Leave takers alone to drain each other 😂🤣

Sense at last!

Except if the previous posters commented before she dropped the full story.

decatalyst:
I will be very blunt with you...I don't mean to hurt you but you really need to have things in perspective and take ownership to feel better and walk a path that will make your life better.

Thing you didn't get right:

1. You married out of desperation. Unfortunately, you seems to be bothered by what the society says, and how you make people feels rather than how your action and inaction will contribute to your life plans.

2. You resent your husband for being 'poor' or should I say you resent him for his inability to match your spending power. You set a standard he is unable to meet and you resent him for it!

3. You want to control the home because you bring the large meat to the table. You feel since you are the one that provides the lion share, you should have total control in the union.

4. You major in the irrelevants, and you seems be the show-off type who will still complain that others are not interested in putting their own resources in your wasteful spending. You have don wedding but you pepper others dey hungry you.


Things you can do better:

1. Submit the leadership of the home to your husband. It is not a woman's duty to lead the home. You should support him in running the affairs of the home. What your husband lack, complement him. Don't take away his shield because you are the one with more money.

2. Look inward and count your blessings. So many are more frustrated because no man is ready to put them under their roof. Be grateful you are married and you have the dignity. Single people can't understand this, please. It's an illusion to think your life will be better off being single, but as days goes by, it becomes miserable being unmarried at certain age. Companionship can never be overpriced.

3. Help your husband be the best he can be. Be his leverage, not his competitor. You can help him grow his portfolio, to have as much as you have, if submitting to someone not having as much as you is so difficult.

4. If you so desire big party, you and your husband can have that big party when you are doing your child's naming! No point re-doing party for a marriage of 2 years. People will have their eyes on you two...that you have too much money, and that may be the beginning of a bigger problem for your home.



In all you do, remember that being a divorcee or a single mother is more difficult than being in a marriage you are not invested in. I wish you the best of luck.

If you want to talk, you can send an email. Peace.

fykes:
If the reason you want to divorce is because he would not throw a glamour party for marriage, then do him a favour and get out fast.

As a woman, you expect a struggling man to throw a party he cannot afford just to please you and show off to people who dont care about him? Or maybe because you think ylu can fund it, so he should just come along for the party?

I dont also live in Nigeria, so i know the stress of hustling abroad. After 30yrs you obviously only planned for a wedding and not for marriage. Thats what 2yrs of marrying has revealed.
If you are not ready to be led and follow a man, please yall should stay single!!

In all her epistle, this is what you gleaned out of it?

The grip that the 'church leadership' have on 'Christians' is super tight.

This is part of the failings of male leadership in the home.

If you are not terrorising your wife or kissing your pastor's behind, must they tell you to stop going for vigils before you assess the security situation and lovingly tell your family that vigils and such activities should be on hold?

It is well.