₦airaland Forum

@Xfabulous.
What's cooking dear?

@Gabrywly , where is ur sense of humour, Of course it is the same as farting.I didn't attend village school,

@Queenisha,
That was very commendable of you. Honestly, I had this gut feeling you were a mom, but kept it to myself.

While I applaud your stance, I really dont think it's anyone's beeswax, Afterall, it's just a forum with faceless people we may NEVER meet.

On that note, I hope you have a boy in the bunch, I love boysMy family has 90% boys,

Queenisha:
Yes they look like scars and differ in types.

Ok, thanks,
Well I saw this lady and she had like 3 lines( different sizes) on each cheeks, I went closer to look becos at first I thought it was make-up. Upon getting closer I realised they were actually marks.

Can someone explain the meaning behind them. I mean why do people have them there? Is it to identify who you are, in terms of tribes etc??

Hannibal:
Of course, it's a huge task.

Physcial attraction plays a huge role for me. . . . . .
Tribal marks are not something that a chic can hide. . . .It's right there pasted on her face.
Chatting her up is a nah-nah(never mind taking her out on a date or marriage).

ok, I am gonna get some tribal marks tomorrow, Let's see you anul the wedding becos of that, , Thought u said "I do" for better or worse, Nonsense,

Hannibal:
I think i may have to follow u to that Igbo Village.
You in a wrapper with heavy wind blowing every now n then. . . . . . .That would be a sight to behold.
Go to the river and balance a bucket on your head, uproot cassavas and even fish!!!!
When are u planning to go again, Nneka??

Heal his mind dear Jesus. Amen


Goodnight Pataki, and remember, He who findeth a wife, findeth a good thing, sweet dreams pally

Queenisha,
What are tribal marks?

I have seen some people with scars( some more hedious than others  on their faces). Are those what are refer to as tribal marks?
Also what is the significance of such, Honestly, it looks barbaric to me, Just my two cents, No insults intended,

Pataki:
As to being the BIONIC woman, I got my eyes on you too now.

Its a tough call Chat. When I mull over my childhood crushes, I get confused as to whom it will finally be.

Well you better make up ur mind jor , I am getting  old, soon I wont be able to wear stilettos and I need to walk in them at your wedding. So just hurry up dread, and marry someone

Hannibal:
Ewure-looking babes??  Chat2meBac taught me!!!
She understands yoruba more than i do. . . . Its crazy.
Looking at her critically, i am willing to stake ma mortgage she is Igbo.
A proper Nneka Ngozi or Ndidi. . . . .She is tracing her roots later in the year to the East.

But I have told you repeatedly I am indeed Igbo now, My sister did her DNA dread. EVen two Nigerian doctors at her hospital confirmed we look very much igbo, So when I come to Nigeria I am going to find my relatives in my village, I want to tie wrapper, go to the river and dig yams dread

@Pataki,
Let's just say I am the new Bionic woman, I see where NO man can see

Hannibal:
I agree!!! He was afraid of roaches but he wasn't afraid of girls.
Kissing was his only vice!!!!
While other boys were running around playing football and rugby. . . .El would be crammed in a locker practising James Bond moves on innocent chics.

Pataki must marry this year. . . . Do u have any willing chic ready to tie Pataki down.
She must be tall, pretty with the correct vital stats!!!!!
Ewure-looking chics are out of bounds.

El was actually in the closet hiding from the school's notorious bully dread

And how can Pataki marry this year when he cannot decide between Olga, Nadia, Ugo or Natalia

tunku:
I am listening to Kaya and Uprsing by Bob Marley and the Wailers and man this has got to be one of the greatest albums imo. I am just wondering what are your taughts on Bob Marley in general. Did you grow up listening to the tapes in Nigeria or have you never listened to his songs. post.

Yo don no Bob ah de man fu reckon wit, seen!!

Bob is indeed a legend, I grew up listening to him and I love this man( although I have never met him) to death. His lyrics are clean and clear cut. He meant what he sung, and sung what he meant.May his soul rest in peace and his music lives on!!!

Among my favourites are:
Pimpers paradise
No woman no cry
Trenchtown rock
We jammin
Buffalo Soldier
I shot the sherrif
War
Uprising

Hannibal:
Says who??
Eldee became a LEGEND at the age of 4. . . . . . .
Heard through the grapevine he kissed all the girls in his class.
What a record!!!!

Babes, what can we do to Pataki??
He is running freely and breaking young girl's hearts.
From Amsterdam to Paris to berlin to Milan to London. . . . .
I hope u don't have any relative in those cities. . . . .The Black Hugh Hefner has been born!!!

Eldee became what Legend?  Na lie, pls abeg, At age 4 he was still afraid of thunder,

As to that one Pataki, ONLY Jesus can save his soul. HIs womanizing has become a sight for sore eyes, Intel told me he was seen leaving the" Crayfish" pub wedged between two blonds, I am praying for him jor

Eldee, sharrap jor,

The only mummy and daddy u played was in the back of your Sunday school class, 

Hannibal:
It wasn't me . . . . . .I sucked no premature boobs!!!!
Toluwani and Adetayo?? My dayze!!!
Your yoruba teacher should be handed a medal.

so extend your hands nah,

Hannibal:
Hannibal was the baby??
You mean i was sucking unripe breasts at the age of 5??
What else are u going to accuse me of tonight?

Whose unripened breasts u were sucking. Toluwani and Adetayo? I am going to call their parents this moment, That is why they ended up so feisty with boys from young ages. It's because you had already "break" them in??/ HMMMMMMMMMMMMM

eldee:
It was the only activity boys and girls could share . . .
Although . . . I swear, all we did snuggle up under the duvet and I tot I was enjoying myself

I remember I got caught once
Come to think of it, no one had ever told me it was wrong
But see the way I was sweating and composing useless lies like 'we were sleeping', 'she fell down'

It's lie jor

I never played mummy and daddy, Instead I played cowboys and Indians dread

And don't mind Hannibal, He used to be the baby in mummy and daddy

Pataki, so u one ah dem boys who was "forced ripe"? , yo have vice ah yo ass, wh? You should be learning your alphabets, instead you looking into girls eyes,

Hannibal:
Don't hate the PLAYER. . . . .hate the GAME.


Me?? . . . . . . . .I am now retired.
I hung ma boots when Chat2meBac copped me a hamstring and dislocation of the waist.

NOt only that, talk the truth man, I dislocate your tolo too

eldee:
Ask Debo, he'll take you to his alma mater
His chalk-slate is reserved there, he even brings his stool to school by himself

I want you to take me instead,

@Pataki,
J girl is safe and sound, I will relay that to her ASAP,

@topic
NO we don't fart, we politely position ourselves to comfortably release the excess gas which has accumulated. We do so in such a way that it doesn't affect anyone or anything in our pressence,

Pataki:
Volunteer officer? Probably it was me. I was once a volunteer officer.

I will go get J girl for u jor, She is my partner in Nl crime dread

Hannibal:
I have always known u are a PLAYER.
Identifying beauty at a tender age of 3?? ??
Ya player of the month status might just extend to August.

ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh,
You guys and this playa thingy, see ur sef

Hannibal:
Just stating an opinion. . . . .

I can't remember anyone having a putrescent body odour in ma primary school.
Dem kids were posh. . . .
Village schools don't have classrooms. . . . .Kids are taught under a mango tree.
Don't even compare, sistren!!!

De best place to be taught dread,

Teacher: Children 12 divided by 2 =

wind blows mangoes begin to fall,

Children: Teacher mangoes oooooo, ley we eat first then we go come back to solve de math ,

You Posh boys don't know what y'all missing dread, Village life is de best,

eldee:
Nah . . . you don't know Ajanlekoko Edcational Center (AKA Madam KwoiKoi)

Oh!! I see, hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, No problem o, I will want to go visit Ajanlekoko Educational Center when I visit Naija( Hannibal take note o), ,

@topic
I also had a crush on one of my Peace corp, Volunteers, He had this "Justin Timberlake" kinda look, The girls used to tease me ''L and Mr.Beck kissing in a tree , fill in the rest jor,

Hannibal:
Jeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeez!!!!!!!!!
Did u attend a village school??

.
So anything wront wit dat? na same teacher wey dey ah village, dey ah town?/

Queenisha:
Are you telling there were girls lined up behind a man's house,e ducated girls with good well paying jobs lined up and waiting for a turn with Mr Lennox each one knowing what the other was waiting for?
Sounds incredible
Are girls in Nigeria that cheap now?
What exactly did Mr lennox have that people were standing in a queue to experience?

Maybe his tolo had honey and sugar at the tip, who knows why they lined up? The fact is "money makes the mare runs" and as much as you and I will debate that it's wrong. People, women included, do desperate things.

Again Education is NOT commonsense.  I know many educated girls with no street sense, thus they are very vunerable to men, the dogs kinds that is,

Ofcourse they all know what they were getting into.  But to them, they didnt care,

PS, you forgot I am not Nigerian, I am refering to an incident that took place when I was younger on my islands,

Hannibal:
Do u really expect me to kiss u for the highlighted statement?? Pea brain??
Tell me, if men are truly DOGS. . . . what about the women that opened their thighs IN CONSENT for this unholy schitzo to take place??
I agree men are dogs but WOMEN are BITCHES!!!!

Ok, if 6/10 men are "buggers", then it is classified that the majority is, and since majority rules then men are "buggers"
So even if you do right, the fact that the other 6 out of the 10 messed up terribly, then y'all are all "buggers"

Hannibal:
In other words, Hannibal is a sinner??

Concerning u growing up in a church, i need physical evidence.
Documentx, Pics, Video Clips and every other thing u can lay your hands on.
Agreed??

ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, Hannibal is a sinner? LOL, BTW, How was church today? Intel told me you led Praise and Worship

AS to the proof, I will have Fedex deliver them ASAP,

Queenisha:
What I want to know is who are these girls that let themselves be treated this way?
What did their parents teach/not teach them ?
The women also have a huge part of the blame here

You made some valid points, but unfortunately, I cannot provide answers as to why they allowed themselves to be treated in such demeaning ways.
As my Mama always say " a man will get away with what ever crime you allow him to commit against you"

Queenisha:
They were girls with low self esteem,maybe sexually exploited [b]and perhaps poor too.[/b]Not all but most.

Not necessarily true, Most of them were educated girls, from great homes with excellent jobs, I do agree with you that low or no self esteem played a
major role. One thing I have learnt in life is that low selfesteem is a respector of no one, Has nothing to do with your social class at all.  

I just don't understand men, One day, maybe in my next life, I would want to come back as a man so i can get into their pea brain to see and experience all that goes on there,

Feu:
Please what is the meaning of Olodo?

I had crushes for my cousin not that I made love to my cousin

Stop crying dread, Did I say u made love to her? God forbid,

Olodo? hmmmmmmmmmm, let me go consult my yoruba teacher, brb

HCH3COO:
lol wow.

Yea, wow, The earth would have been such a better place if Eve had just poison Adam with that apple

eldee:
Mr Lenoxx is the Playa's Playa, the man's man . . .
If he was a dog . . . then what of 'em women? BITCHES!!!

Holy Mother of Jesus, So yo don lan, eh?

I am waiting for the last member of the "Rat pack" to show up, then I can go Vivica Fox on y'all asses tonight,

Queenisha:
Men can be dogs
woof woof!!

Tell me about it, I grew up with 5 brothers, and only 1 was a saint, The other 4, all dogs, I just couldnt understand why the girl stood for their nonsense, ,

One time Mr. Lennox had a line outside my mom's back door, As soon as one exit, he shouted 'NEXT" and the odes went in, Thank God my mother was and still is a praying woman, She used to pray for us all night NOT to fall in the hands of men like them,

Hannibal:
You are in trouble.
By the time u get back from your party, your clothes would be waiting outside in em Ghana bags.
I thunk u said u were a church girl as a kid!!!!   Crush on who??

But it's the truth naa, My sister's husband pastored one of the biggest churches on the Island, My grandpa was Methodist Minister and my brother's wife was also the pastor of another huge church, I grew up in the church,

But since I met you, I have backslid, lard have mercy

Feu:


How can you please explain to me?

Explain what Olodo, u being in love with ur cousin, na be sin?

Queenisha:
Tufiakwa!
does his wife know?

I don't think she is aware of his calls to me, but I am sure she knows about his "bed-hopping' ways.  The thing is when they were first started dating, soon after she returned from doing her Masters in NC, he introduced me to her as his "cousin", I had no problem,because as I said both of the families are very close.  But I know he has ulterior motives. I even heard he was at UWI in TNT, while she was in a delivery room in NC, When my mom confronted him, his excuse was, He had assays to complete, See me see wahala ooo,

Ah tings like dis mek me fraid de aisle business, contrary to popular belief here, had more than one opportunities too, I chickened out oo,

Feu:
My childhood crush was my cousin.

Abomination!!

@topic
My childhood crush was the son of one of my dad's colleagues, Man I had it bad for that guy. But the dude said I was a "lil girl", Well Karma did come back. By the time I got to Secondary school, with my bust and hips in tow, he was all over me like bubble bees, But by then, I was just NOT into him.

He's married today, but still calls periodically to inform of (according to him), what might have been, Que las ti ma

Hannibal:
What type of humour??
Blimey. . . . .women do this in Nigeria.
At least i saw a actress doing tNollywood hat in a movie.

so u see, it's NOT unheard of then,

@topic
You cannot make anyone fall in love with you. Love is unconditional, and it "bites" even the "tough nuts" amongst us,

@Eldee
wassup?

I have never met a nation more obsessed with Marriage, Gosh, It's a choice. I rather money in my bank account to a title, Education and wealth should be top priority, not a ring and title and pregnancies every 12 months,

superstan:
Tun tun water?? Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!!!!!!!!
Sometimes, a man needs to watch what he eats then. . . . . . .Can't imagine eating such with ma rice!!!!!
A woman does that to me, i would whack her legs when i find out.

LOL, chillax, It was meant to humour my dearly beloved above, I am just kidding oo

@topic
1. Have you ever slept with or have intimate feelings for a man??

2. Do you work?

3. Have you slept with animals before?

4. What is your religious views?

5. Acadamic achievements,

6. Do you drink, smoke or snort?

7. Are you good in bed?

8. Can you maintain me and my lifestyle?

9. Do your snore in your sleep?

10. Will you donate ( if we are compatible) a kidney in the event I may need one??

Hannibal:
Anyone?? What a dumb topic!!!!
How can u make anyone(including sexual deviants, tramps, vagrants, pederasts, onanists and all sorts) fall in love with someone.
Where are the mods for crying out loud??

LOL, what do u know dread? ,

You give the man tun tun water for a whole week. Em bong to fall head, eye, teeth and nail over in love wit ya