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Jobs/Vacancies / Re: For Job Seekers: Where You Can Find Jobs Online In Nigeria. by checkdate(m): 7:38pm On Sep 13, 2014
THANK YOU FOR THIS HELP.
Family / Re: Funny Pictures Of Kids And Their Dads by checkdate(m): 7:03pm On Sep 13, 2014
timawoku: here are some cool funny pics of father and son
see his own

39 Likes 2 Shares

Culture / Re: Funny African Proverbs by checkdate(m): 6:42pm On Sep 13, 2014
Only a courageous woman can fry a bunch of
plantain without tasting any-
Albert Marcauley (1872)
.
He who says nothing last forever has never tried Hausa perfume- Nelson Mandela (1973)
.
He who completely unwrap moimoi and gala b4 eating cannot keep a secret-
Abraham Lincoln (1864)
.
Any man that uses his teeth to cut shaki from
pepper soup, with his eyes wide open, is not afraid of anything- William Shakespear (1900)
'
Anyone who graduate without expiriencing strike, has never been to Nigeria-
Lord Lugard (1904)
:
He who refuse to mix agege bread and akara as a type of sandwich is a racist-
Martin Luther King jnr (1788)
.
Any man who drinks Alomo bitters without
squeezing his face, is capable of murder- Michael Faraday (1899)
.
Drinking Garri doesn't mean u're poor, but allowing the Garri to swell b4 drinking is poverty- Queen Elizabeth (1893)
.
He who runs around looking 4 scissors to cut
indomine seasoning sachet is not hungry-
Dr Nnamdi Azikiwe (1947)
.
Anyone who read this without laughing is either looking 4 job or Needs Jesus Badly- Arch. Namadi Sambo (2014)



.



.


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BIKE MAN: Where are you going to?

PROSTITUTE: I'm going to the mortuary.

BIKE MAN: Sorry it's late, I can't drop you there except you pay me 3000 naira.

PROSTITUTE: No problem, when we get there, you'll be paid. (When they got to the mortuary, the prostitute said,) "Wait here a second, let me go get you the money."(When the man waited for an hour without seeing the prostitute, he decided to go in search of her. He pushed open the gate of the mortuary a little bit, took some steps in, before noticing someone,who appeared to be the mortuary attendant, lounging around)

ATTENDANT: How can I help you sir?

BIKE MAN: I gave a lady a ride to this place, she asked me to wait for her to go inside and get the money for the ride, but didn't come back.

ATTENDANT: No one entered here! So I don't know what you are talking about.
(The bike man insisted and decided to stay and wait for the lady. The attendant thought for a
while and asked him to follow him into the mortuary room. When they got there)

ATTENDANT: (He picks up a stick beside him, and points it towards the bodies) If you know you entered a bike and didn't pay, quickly raise up your hand and bring it out or else I will beat all of you with this stick! (Quickly, one of the dead bodies raised up her hand and threw the money at the bike rider.)

If you were the bike man, what wil l you do?














A M P R O U D L Y N I G E R I A N !
Sports / Re: No Eagles Without Mikel — Keshi by checkdate(m): 11:01am On Sep 12, 2014
msmon: Nigeria national team coach Stephen Keshi says he still believes that John Obi Mikel is a vital cog in the Super Eagles side, despite the midfielder’s lack of game time at his club, Chelsea.
Mikel has not been overly influential during Nigeria’s first two 2015 African Cup of Nations (AFCON) qualifying games, which have seen the Super Eagles picking up just a single point from their opening two matches against Congo (2-3) and South Africa (0-0).
Against Bafana Bafana, Mikel was outplayed by Man of the Match Andile Jali, the 24-year-old Belgium-based midfielder who South Africa will build their future around.
It was Jali’s speed, tenacity and skill on the ball that won him most of the one on one battles against the Super Eagles
midfielders.
Mikel appears to having fallen down the pecking order at Stamford Bridge, having only had 23 minutes of action so
far this season for the big-spending London club, but Keshi remains adamant that the 27-year-old is an important part of the national team.

“Just because he is not playing in his team (Chelsea), that does not mean I cannot use him in my team, that’s the coaches’ choice,” Keshi said after
Wednesday night’s 0-0 draw with Bafana Bafana in Cape Town.
“But in my team, if I think that he is good shape, with the wealth of experience he has, all his years in the Champions League, I think he’s very important for us in the team, and we just have to make the best of the situation.”


www.vanguardngr.com/2014/09/cant-without-mikel-keshi/
USELESS IDIOTS BLABBING TRASH

1 Like

Religion / Re: TOP 7 Facts About Pastor Chris Oyakhilome by checkdate(m): 11:32pm On Sep 02, 2014
LaRoyalHighness: Pastor don enter one change...
ONE WETIN ?
Politics / Re: Where Is Gwoza Sef?” Jonathan Asks At Meeting With Emir by checkdate(m): 3:51pm On Sep 01, 2014
NgeneUkwenu: In a bizarre tale that illustrates how Nigeria is run, President Goodluck Jonathan arrived two weeks ago at a top secret meeting with the exiled Emir of Gwoza, the newly-named headquarters of Boko Haram’s so-called “Islamic Caliphate,” with no knowledge of the location of Gwoza, presidency sources at the meeting said.

Suleiman Abba stands next to President Goodluck Jonathan on the scene of a deadly bus station bombing in Abuja
The Emir, Muhammed Timta, escaped after the militants invaded Gwoza on August 16 and took over his palace.

He arrived in Abuja after first making his way to Maiduguri to escape further attempts on his life. His father, Idrissa Timta, had died in a Boko Haram ambush on May 30, 2014 as Boko Haram ambushed his convoy on his way to the burial of the Emir of Gombe.

Shortly after Timta’s arrival in Abuja, President Jonathan sent for the Emir, who was accompanied to the meeting by a Borno Senator, Ali Ndume. However, to the utter shock of the Emir, President Jonathan did not know where Gwoza was located: Adamawa or Borno State.

Presidency sources said silence enveloped the room after the President, apparently lacking basic research or a briefing by his numerous aides and security agencies, asked in condescending pidgin, “Where’s Gwoza sef?”

Mr. Jonathan then promised to ‘liberate’ Gwoza after Senator Ndume told him Gwoza was his home town and that it is located in Borno State.

Gwoza remains under the control of Boko Haram after the sect took over the township in a raid and declared the town the headquarters of the “Islamic Caliphate” in the Northeast of Nigeria.

At least three attempts by Nigerian troops have been repelled by the militants. Several soldiers and innocent civilians were killed.


http://saharareporters.com/2014/09/01/“where-gwoza-sef”-jonathan-asks-meeting-emir
hmmmmmm !

3 Likes

Education / Re: Pictures:do U Remember This? by checkdate(m): 1:32pm On Sep 01, 2014
wowwwww ! BACK IN THEY DAYS WHEN GOING TO SCHOOL WAS A WHOLE LOT OF FUN.
Politics / Re: Battle For Bama -boko Haram Strom Bama, Borno, Nigerian Army Repelled Attack by checkdate(m): 1:23pm On Sep 01, 2014
amiskurie: And a fool never resign undecided
HOW BEST WOULD YOU DEAL WITH THE SITUATION/MATTER IF YOU ARE THE COMANDER IN CHIEF OF THE ARMED FORCES ?
Politics / Re: Battle For Bama -boko Haram Strom Bama, Borno, Nigerian Army Repelled Attack by checkdate(m): 1:21pm On Sep 01, 2014
Fash20: THIS SPACE IS NOT FOR SALE BEWARE OF 419.
YOU NEED SERIOUS HELP FROM MOUNTAIN OF FIRE DELIVERANCE MINISTRY

1 Like

Phones / Re: Stop Paying To Send Message Now by checkdate(m): 5:27pm On Aug 27, 2014
Please do not post adverts in this section, to
avoid being banned.
Autos / Re: Meet The Six Bulletproof Cars You Can Buy by checkdate(m): 5:10pm On Aug 27, 2014
dotna:

i agree. i just love the Audi A8 for WOW interior. It is so sweet. The simple exterior shows it is for only discreet expensive personality. No wonder it is Russians favorite car










HONESTLY !
Romance / Re: 5 Facts About Sex One Needs To Know by checkdate(m): 5:08pm On Aug 27, 2014
desess: Hmmmm, remember those days when the word sex was mentioned in awe, when one who made fuss about the word was considered to be immoral

well, d story is different today... even kids in primary school knows what goes on in the sex world... our media have made matters worse than they were.... for one to make waves in the music industry, it takes a few well composed lyrics with d sex content..

Well, sex was meant to be enjoyed in the confines n security of marriage... before u sleep with dat guy or girl, consider d following facts.

1, A man who has self control over his sex urges can exercise self control and discipline in other areas of his life.

2 The paradox of sex is d more u indulge in it, the less u can control yourself... or can u explain a scenario where a lady or man who had sex after many years of abstinence can not control his or herself.

3 Sex especially among youths makes them to be arrogant, aggressive and wayward... after all, they don't see d difference between them and their elders.

4 Ladies take note, a guy can be promiscous n have his way,but that's not so for ladies.. everytime u sleep with a guy, ur vagina undergoes wear n tear, ie you lose ur elasticity that makes sex pleasurable for a guy.. a guy that sleeps with u will not tell u dat ur vagina is loose, in fact it destroys ur relationship with them..... in their mind, they are wondering how many guys have slept with u...

5 Sex makes u lost zeal and direction....now,this may account for the level of failure among students. Guys, do u know dat d calories of energy burned out during a single act can be channeled to profitable acts.. if u want to focused, if u want to make it 2 d apex,then u should think less of sex... a guy once told me dat his main distraction while in school was because of d girl he kept...

So what,s ur take on dis.... .add urs if possible.
Sexkills come and see another bad market news ohhh
Romance / Re: 5 Facts About Sex One Needs To Know by checkdate(m): 5:07pm On Aug 27, 2014
i warned her
Celebrities / Re: OMG!!! You Won't Believe This Is Actress Nkiru Silvanus![photo] by checkdate(m): 4:59pm On Aug 27, 2014
contactmorak:
Sexy and charming are the first words that came to mind when we saw this pix. The actress who recently premiered her Red Camera-Shot film "The Voice", used this photo as her BBM DP last night. We've never seen her this alluring.

www.splendormag.com/2014/06/omg-you-wont-believe-this-is-actress.html

SO WHATS THE BIG DEAL !

1 Like 1 Share

Autos / Re: Meet The Six Bulletproof Cars You Can Buy by checkdate(m): 4:55pm On Aug 27, 2014
LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT !


dotna: Audi A8 L Security


Don’t be fooled by Audi’s spiel that the base of this A8 features aluminium and the whole Audi Space Frame tech – this car will still stop an explosive.

Its body panels and passenger cell are strong enough to withstand the might of NATO sub-caliber ammunition rounds, and in some areas, even complies to the highest ballistics protection against explosions. You’re talking materials like heat-formed armour steel, aramide fabric, ceramic, and multi-laminated glass.

It can prevent against military hand grenades, and can be optioned not only with a cool stereo, but also pressurised air cartridges that pump breathing-quality air into the cabin during a smoky zone.
Autos / Re: Meet The Six Bulletproof Cars You Can Buy by checkdate(m): 4:53pm On Aug 27, 2014
LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT !

1 Like 2 Shares

Culture / Re: Awareness On Ebola Virus Made In Igbo Language by checkdate(m): 10:14am On Aug 21, 2014
Okeikpu: Kitikpa gbawaa gi onu there! Eghu!
i
wish
you
the
same.
Culture / Re: Awareness On Ebola Virus Made In Igbo Language by checkdate(m): 9:47am On Aug 21, 2014
Okeikpu: What's Ebola ??
GOOGLE IS CREATED FOR THIS KIND OF QUESTIONS.



good some where else with your dirty username.

*****pervert*****
Culture / Re: Awareness On Ebola Virus Made In Igbo Language by checkdate(m): 12:05am On Aug 21, 2014
swizzle: This is an ebola awareness video made using Igbo language. I think this is a good thing. I hope it inspires some people to do similar a thing with their own language. Kudos to him! smiley

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QMRE4BlCdvo

Mod front page please!!!
W I S E M E N F R O M T H E E A S T

35 Likes

Travel / Re: Malaysia Airlines Flight Mh370:Pilot Killed Passengers,Sank Plane Intact-EXPERTS by checkdate(m): 11:51pm On Aug 20, 2014
widowhusband: like 3 or 4 days ago i read from yahoo news that the bank of 4 of the lost passengers reported to relevant authorities abt some activity in their account recently. so they r followin the lead, lets see what they'l get
I SOW THIS SAME REPORT ON CNN.
Travel / Re: Malaysia Airlines Flight Mh370:Pilot Killed Passengers,Sank Plane Intact-EXPERTS by checkdate(m): 11:50pm On Aug 20, 2014
oskaaay: Malaysia Airlines Flight MH370 pilot Zaharie Ahmad Shah is the man responsible for the plane’s baffling disappearance, brilliantly executing a sinister plot to prove his superior aviation skills by ensuring that the Boeing 777-200 would never be found. Those are the conclusions of Ewan Wilson, an aviator, accident investigator and founder of Kiwi Airlines, who conducted an independent, four-month study of the Malaysia Airlines mystery.

“Ahmad Shah was a man known for his methodical, thorough nature, for his love of the technical, and probably for his ego, too,” said Wilson, whose findings are detailed in his new book, Goodnight Malaysian 370: The Truth Behind The Loss Of Flight 370. “This would have been his final sad act to his family and to the world: ‘find this one.’”

Wilson says he and co-author Geoff Taylor investigated “every conceivable alternative scenario” before arriving at the shocking conclusions in the book, in which he argues that Shah locked his co-pilot out of the cockpit then deliberately murdered all 239 people on board by depressurizing the Malaysia Airlines Flight MH370 cabin, which would have deprived everyone on board of oxygen.

While oxygen masks would have automatically dropped, Wilson acknowledges, he says that with many of the passengers asleep they may not have been aware of the masks, which provide only about 20 minutes worth of oxygen anyway.

But Shah, described by Wilson as mentally ill, put his twisted plan into effect a full four hours before finally ditching the Malaysia Airlines plane in the Indian Ocean, the independent New Zealand investigator says.

Malaysia Airlines Flight MH370 vanished from radar and ground contact during an otherwise routine March 8 flight from Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, to Beijing, China. But despite a multimillion dollar search involving numerous countries, not a single trace of the plane or scrap of debris has turned up.

Wilson says he has a solution to that mystery as well. After killing everyone on board, Shah either re-pressurized the cabin or survived on is own, more plentiful oxygen supply for the final four hours.

At that time, Wilson says, Shah landed the plane on the surface of the Indian Ocean in what Wilson calls a “controlled ditching,” similar to that executed by US Airways pilotChelsey “Sully” Sullenberger on the surface of the Hudson River in New York in 2009.
But instead of attempting to save the Malaysia Airlines plane, Shah simply allowed the Boeing 777 to sink to the bottom of the ocean in one piece — leaving no debris or evidence, Wilson says.

“We could never have foreseen the information we uncovered, or their implications,” Wilson says. “Neither could we have imagined the horrific scenario that our research suggests took place on board that

Culled from http://prowlingeagles.com/blog/malaysia-airlines-flight-mh370-pilot-killed-passengers-sank-plane-intact-ocean-expert-says/
No Wahala .


Bring This Up To The Front Page Lets Analyse The Claims.
NYSC / Re: Nysc 2014 Batch B Stream 2 Three Weeks Orientation Camp Cancelled by checkdate(m): 8:00am On Aug 20, 2014
blessingnnam: This people just rubbis themselves and not me, imagine after buying things. May God have mercy on them
IS FOR YOUR OWN BETTERMENT

1 Like

Politics / Re: Boko Haram: Soldiers Mutiny, Demand Better Equipment by checkdate(m): 4:38pm On Aug 19, 2014
9ja4Change: A group of soldiers in north-eastern Nigeria is refusing to fight Boko Haram militants until they receive better equipment, one of the mutineers has told the BBC.

The soldier, who requested anonymity, said at least 40 of his colleagues would refuse orders to deploy.

The military has not commented on the reported mutiny or the demands.

A state of emergency that was declared in three north-eastern states last year has failed to curb the insurgency.

Boko Haram has stepped up its attacks after being pushed out of its bases in Maiduguri, the capital of Borno state, targeting towns and villages in deadly raids.

“Soldiers are dying like fowl,” the soldier, who said he and his colleagues were just outside Maiduguri, told the BBC service.

“The Nigerian army is not ready to fight Boko Haram,” he said, explaining that soldiers were not being given enough weapons and ammunition to take them on.

“Boko Haram are inside the bush, everywhere,” he said “They [senior commanders] are sacrificing soldiers,” he said.

Even the vehicles the soldiers were expected to use were old armoured cars that were not up to the job, he added.

A general in the army, who asked not to be named, told the BBC that he was unable to confirm the mutiny, but said “cowardice” was not uncommon in times of war – and any mutineers would be punished.

When the solder was asked if he feared being court-martialled for taking part in the mutiny, he said that a soldier could only be taken to task for refusing to go to war.

“I joined the army to defend my country”, but you cannot defend it without being equipped to do so, he said.

In April, Boko Haram caused global outrage by abducting more than 200 girls from a boarding school in the remote town of Chibok in Borno state.

The group has also carried out a wave of bombings and assassinations, including that of moderate Muslim leaders opposed to its ideology.

SOURCE: BBC News
GIBBRISH !

2 Likes

Sports / Re: I Will Never Bite Anyone Again— Suarez by checkdate(m): 4:31pm On Aug 19, 2014
Alishachris:

idiota!!
Bros. How market.
Sports / Re: I Will Never Bite Anyone Again— Suarez by checkdate(m): 4:15pm On Aug 19, 2014
Pergrace: Barcelona striker Luis Suarez said he has received professional help after receiving a four-month ban for biting an opponent for the third time in his career
“The quality that Leo and Ney have is amazing, they are players you admire. Yesterday I was watching them in the first half and they make you want to stop and applaud.”

- See more at: http://www.vanguardngr.com/2014/08/will-never-bite-anyone-suarez/#sthash.oh9ajM1T.dpuf


I will say an Amen to that... cheesy cheesy cheesy
ONCE A DOG; ALWAYS A DOG.

CHARACTER IS LIKE PREGNANCY; THE MORE YOU TRY TO HIDE OR CHANGE IT THE MORE IT BUILDS UP EXTRA MOMENTUM INSIDE THE BEARER.

Just like
Alishachris:

!!

11 Likes

European Football (EPL, UEFA, La Liga) / Re: Besiktas Vs Arsenal :Champions League Playoff : (0 - 0) On 19th August 2014 by checkdate(m): 12:11pm On Aug 19, 2014
luvola: Arsenal left-back Kieran Gibbs will miss both legs of the Champions League play-off against Besiktas with a hamstring injury.

Gibbs, 24, could be missing for up to three weeks after suffering the injury in Saturday's win over Crystal Palace.

That could mean a recall for Per Mertesacker, who returned late for pre-season training after helping Germany to World Cup success.

Striker Yaya Sanogo has not travelled to Turkey for Tuesday's first leg.

But defender Laurent Koscielny is fit after recovering from an Achilles problem.

On Mertesacker's possible inclusion, Wenger confirmed: "It was our plan to bring the Germans back in contention for Everton on Saturday, but in case of emergency I will take Mertesacker.

"It is a bit early for him.

"Ideally we would need one more week preparation, but he is willing to play, no problem."

Arsenal will face Slaven Bilic's side at the 72,000-capacity Ataturk Olympic Stadium, where Liverpool beat AC Milan in the 2005 Champions League final, as Besiktas's Vodafone Arena is being redeveloped.

Besiktas, runners-up in last season's Turkish championship defeated Dutch side Feyenoord 5-2 on aggregate in the third round of qualifying, with former Chelsea striker Demba Ba scoring a hat-trick in the second leg.

Midfielder Atiba Hutchinson has a hamstring problem and is rated as only 50-50.

Arsenal defeated another Turkish club, Fenerbahce, at the same stage last season.


http://www.bbc.com/sport/0/football/28784340
I LIKE SOCCER
Health / Re: Nano Silver Can Cure Ebola – Manufacturer by checkdate(m): 3:45am On Aug 19, 2014
THIS FELLOW WHOSE POST IS BEFORE MINE IS MENTAL PATIENT

BadBoy25: I am very disappointed that the ebola disease hasn't wiped out the entire west and central africa shiithole. nano silver should be shipped in bulk and circulated in west africa . I endorse and support the bathing and drinking of salt.
I can't wait for millions of people to die .


--------- -------------------------------------------
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bennygreat1: Good!!! But where's the source of this newz


Noah13: I wonder












http://www.punchng.com/news/nano-silver-can-cure-ebola-experts/

4 Likes

Jobs/Vacancies / Re: Wanna Works With Union Assurance Of Union Bank? by checkdate(m): 2:47pm On Aug 18, 2014
georgee:
.
I don't owe you any explanations about who i am
.
THREAD CLOSED.
.
Bad/Terrible grammar from the Op (Subject)
YOU HAVE FAILED TO GIVE AN ACCOUNT OF WHO YOU ARE.


IT IS CLEAR YOU DO NOT HAVE WHAT IT TAKES TO CLOSE A THREAD.

AM SURE THE OP IS NOT THE FIRST PERSON TO MAKE THAT KIND OF MISTAKE YOU NOTICED.
Jobs/Vacancies / Re: Wanna Works With Union Assurance Of Union Bank? by checkdate(m): 10:31am On Aug 18, 2014
georgee: THREAD CLOSED!
.
BAD ENGLISH
PLEASE WHO ARE YOU ?
Politics / Re: How Ebola Patients Survived – Experts by checkdate(m): 9:00am On Aug 18, 2014
WOW oooooooooo !


http://www.newsday.com.ng/churches-raises-prayer-warriors-ebola-virus-anambr/


. . .TO HELL WITH AMARICA


. . .TO HELL WITH SERUM & ZMAPP


. . . TO HELL WITH W.H.O


. . . TO HELL WITH ANY EXTERNAL AID/HELP


. . . WE NIGERIANS WILL WIN EXTERNALY INDUCED INSURGENCE ( TERRORISM )


. . . WE NIGERIANS WILL WIN THIS EXTERNALY INDUCED ebola virus.


GOD BLESS MY COUNTRY NIGERIA

3 Likes

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