₦airaland Forum

INFOTECH2:
Finally, the water broke! Since 10:05pm last night it's been coming in trickles but but 3:40am it has been increasingly more with cramps.

Another painful cramp by 4:10am and I decided we must leave home by 5am for the hospital.

Got to the general hospital by 5:40am and she has gone into the labour ward. Nurses still a bit sleepy but have asked her to use sanitary pad(panty liner already in place) and have a seat.

Main question is what exactly should I be doing now as her husband apart from praying. Dont want to call family members just yet.

Our first baby.

Bro. How far na? Let's hear the good news please...

What if at delivery she brings forth a female child regardless of what the scan must have said?

Wanti wanti no get, getti getti no want! Na so life be...

Opistorincos:
To be candid, I will choose stopping a moving train over this, I am EXTREMELY shy and I dont knw how to start a Conversation unless its an online convo

You will one day graduate, serve, apply for jobs and stand infront a panel of interviewers to answer questions.
You may come out with good grades but at a point your demeanor will be evaluated especially with your course of study...
So task 1: speak to 5 males, 5 females today. Engage them in such a manner that when you promise them you' all check them up they'll be glad. The clock is ticking...
I'm going off line now, I'll see you around 7pm with enough gist from you...

Opistorincos:
m patiently waiting for your recommendations ma cos its already getting boring, in a class of 100+ students, I don't talk to anyone

Let's start with this task: Talk to 10 people today. I mean walk up to them, initiate a conversation, make sure you get their hostel address, hobbies, department and favourite course. That means you really have to go into conversation with them as you cannot approach and jus ask. Keep me posted. Some may not be in the mood so move to the next person. It's their loss ( anyone that wouldn't want to'gist' with you)

Opistorincos:
thank you so much for the great advice ma

You're welcome. I wish to get progressive reports from you. Make sure you read books. I'll check out some inspirational books for you.
Later...

Opistorincos:
Thats the worst part, I get intimidated easily and I am too nice, I rarely say no to requests even if its at my own detriment

No people will tend to take advantage of you
First of all be yourself. Everyone must not be your friend thus you must not please everyone ( this doesn't mean you should be nasty or rude but don't displease your self always to please others)
Don't let any one on this earth excersise undue influence over you.always take your stand. Know what you want and go for it no matter the obstacles. Don't let any situation scare you. Look into the mirror every morning and speak constructive words into your life.
You may crave for love and acceptance but don't let anyone enslave or exploit you. You are great, the only being greater than you is God, work with this. God see you through... You are the best. Be confident in yourself. Many are wishing to be like you.

Bia nwanyi a, come knack person tori jor!

INFOTECH2:
Thanks for the advice. Though I just got chased out by the nurses. It's truly not an easy task for women oooo.

Wifey is in such a state that I could not bear to see but am praying for safe delivery.

It's not easy but natural. Anyway keep praying, don't stress yourself. Since they chased you, you cannot do much. You guys can talk on phone. Cheer up, you'll soon be a daddy. I'm praying with you too..
I suspect it's a boy. Boys will always be boys y'know

Opistorincos:
strict to the core... jambite ke, m in 300lvl already

Then work on yourself. I know it's not easy. I once had a friend who was strictly brought up by his uncle. Even as a director where he works the traces show but he tried and his efforts yielded reasonable success. Sha hope you don't allow people intimidate you?

RadicallyBlunt:
I cannot forget d day my mother flogged me naked to bleeding point just because I stole garri.

Who did you steal the garri from first! I had always know that the only punishment given to thieves is violent beatings. Maybe she did that to deter you from trying it a second time

Opistorincos ipost=43263004:
the best for where?? strict parenting made me an introvert and now its affecting me as a mass communication undergraduate student

Oh dear, maybe yours were too strict. Though I believe a little slap here and a pinch there would do good. With time you'll loosen up. Are you a jambite?

Like seriously?!

FlawlessRebirth2:
."

Yes!!!

There is basically nothing to do. Pace ( that's what you guys do) pray, chatting is good though you may not enjoy it.I guess she's in the ward and general hospitals I know don't allow men inside except if the child has come or if you paid for a private room but whatever the case stay a bit far from her, her cries will destabilize you. Talk to her on phone. You can call her mum only to intimate her. Try and be calm
But they said it's not adviceable to announce that a woman is in labour sha

Haha! But it brought out the best in us

ahnie:
Mehn Boy o boy,the church stood still.the bandboys had to stop the beatin of the drums.pheeeew,mehn i felt like the ground shud burst open and devour me....Brethrens my Wrappin skirt Fell of my waist oh.come n see drama,i was on my mimi birthday suit.the kind of pant i wore,it has one hook by the left side.....i cudnt even bend down to pick my wrappin skirt again o.i was just starrin sheepishly.it was a fellow co- kwaya..oops sorry choir that bent down and picked my skirt n fixed it back on my waist.i cudnt even wait to kontinue the service of songs with my fellow kwayas..sorry choir members,i jex stood up,with wobbling legs like a weather beaten hyena,i left the church that sunday.when i came home,my Dad was like...Ahnie what happen'di was like...papa we dey on break,dad was like...break as how?that was why i left assemblies of God church oilfield road,warri.trust me,i never passed that street again,because the news did go viral.....!brb time for morning devotion.

Oh boi!!! You no remember to tie am well well abi na your spiritual gyration loosen am??
That brown powder...

ahnie:
My daughter can scatter for africa....xpecially her chest of drawers.lately she has transfered her scatterin passion into my kitchen,i'll be in the livin room,only to hear bangin aluminium sounds emanatin from the kitchen.my neibor wil be shoutin...mummy zino!mummy zino!!!last two weeks she went to scatter electronics....my neibor has this local dog(ekuke)that gav birth recently,so i carried one of her Pup,and stationed it around the electronics,in a bit to scare lil Zino from scatterin the electronics.the first day,she saw the lil2 dog,she was scared and she ran to me.i was so happy that,finally the electronics would rest.yesterday i was insid the kitchen bakin,when i hear the frantic cries of the lil Dog callin for help.i rushed to the parlour and met little Zino,my 7months plus daughter Beating the livin hell outta the poor lil2 dog that i borrowed from my neibor seriously,pantin n murmurin to herself.i fathom that in her lil2 mind,she was like.......so my mummy hired yu,to come scare me abii?in my own father's house,settin boundaries for me abi?the lil2 dog,didnt wait for me to rescue him,before he ran out of the house barkin and cryin @ same time....zino z quiet a handful.

hahaha!!!

ahnie:
My dear,there z not big deal in giving...i could remember when one woman brought her lil2 baby not less than 2years to me....she said i dash yu.i was like...ma'am please No.

No no! I want to hear this story. Person attempted to dash you pikin? Oya wetin happen next?!

Pls what was the question?

ifyalways:
Stay on topic. Thank you !

I guess it's no then

ifyalways:
Tough luck!

If the man is not happy with the old wife anymore, he's free to go and the new wife is free to marry him. They are both consenting adults.

The old wife should suck it up and move on. You can't force anyone to stay with you.

Ain't blaming no one here. My empathies goes to the kids only as this divorce/separation/new wife ish is likely gonna affect them.

YOLO.

If the table were to be turned would this have been your reaction?

vicque:
I do not blame the new lady. some men are really just enduring their wives.but I blame the husband.he should do the proper thing and give her a divorce. if he is tired of his loveless marriage.

How do you know it's a loveless marriage?

A thousand and one curses on all the husband theives around who will never toil with a man but will want to live in already furnished house as second wives. Thieves!! The curse of Jehovah is already on all of them! AMEN!!!

bukatyne:
Does God love unconditionally?

Yes

Mindfulness:
The question is whether you would still love him if he did.

The question has to be real

Why do good men end up with selfish women?
Why do decent women end up with irresponsible men?
However, how strong willed are you? I believe a man ought to be stronger than the wife, I believe a man should be in control. So are you in control of your home? It's your spiritual responsibility to determine the course of your home.
When she chats what do you do/ say?
When she compares you to others , what do you do?
Didn't you notice some of these traits you don't like during courtship? What did you do then?
You have to gradually let her know you can't be any other person but you. Communication matters.
Don't be harsh
Take your stand and be as firm as permissible.
Do you guys do morning devotion? Be the pastor during the devotion, always refer to scripture passages that frown at her wrong deeds...
God help you
Though challenges come up in marriages; don't give up/ in, marriage is very sweet!

raumdeuter:
If he does a Caitlin Jenner starts smoking becomes physically abusive and abusing drugs would you still love him unconditionally?

One thing you should consider is his type of person from day one. He drinks occasionally not more than a bottle. Doesn't mix with people of questionable character etc etc.
Why will he wake up suddenly to smoke and do drugs? There are certain habits that cannot be picked up at certain age.
However if he comes home tomorrow with even a bottle of dry gin(God forbid) the love I have for him will compel me to work on him and assertain the cause of the new habit then followed by enough binding and casting!

mykaboo:
Yes, I love my fiance unconditionally. SOmetimes he lies to me a lot and sometimes makes the dumbest decisions but in my heart, I cannot hate him. He has unrealistic expectations of love in that he assumes that I am to give him money whenever he asks without question and hesitation. We argue but at the end of the day, I continue to pray for God to give him love in his heart and wisdom and understanding in things. It really hurts to truly love someone and to wonder if they can ever really love you back the way that you love them.

I feel you and I wish you the best. In most cases they love you back but aren't good in expressing it. If your heart is positive and large ( accomodating)enough, you break all barriers

PresVA:
Nobody is praying for such.. just to let you know that love has conditions. .
You may love him because he doesn't abuse you..then his other good qualities..
But if he ever beats you, your love for him will never be same again...eettccc

There are reasons we love! There must be some kind of attachment. ..

I understand you love your spouse a lot but.....

If your child, God forbid indulges in any manner of vices will you disown or let the love diminish? The answer in most cases is no! Why will you then love your spouse less if he misbehaves?
Love hopes for the best. I don't see him hitting me because I love him. It takes a weak man to hit a woman, and I know he's not weak, I don't wish he becomes weak, I pray he never hits me because it's an irresponsible man that does that and he's not that
Another side of the coin is this, what must I have done to make him hit me? If I do my part as a dutiful and loving wife, why then will he hit me?
Love is a reciprocal, there is no way you'll be committed and get beatings in return. I try to do stuffs that promotes peace in the home why then must they beat me?

PresVA:
Op,.....Hmmmm, really don't think there's anything like unconditional love because there are things/qualities/conditions ettcc, that make us love who we love!

will you still love your husband as much as you do now if he cheats or abuses you? (God forbid though, just a question)

Physical and verbal abuse isn't part of it. He will never do it. I trust him and God willing, he will never betray that trust.
As for the cheating part, leave matter o. I don't want to raise dust here but believe me when I say I love him deeply, unconditionally!!

raumdeuter:
No. I doubt anyone does unless they really dont understand what it means

Love is usually based on certain conditions. Unconditional love means regardless of what happens to the person or what the person does, even if the person kills your child you would still continue to love them equally

There is always a reasonable man's standard. Murder is huge yet you don't expect the one you love most to kill your child.
Howbeit, I've seen where a man's son mistakenly killed his elder brother's first son. I don't know what transpired between them but they still lived together for years without retaliation. I mean they lived in the same compound, ate from each other's pots. That my friend spells unconditional love. Ability to forgive grevious offences