₦airaland Forum

also interested in football betting, email: benacademy@gmail.com

bin gbagbo:
1.Invite a pregnant woman to your house.

 2.Give her a purgative to drink

 3.Play "oliver" by D'banj for her

 4.Two hours later, direct her to your water-closet
 
 5.Let her shittz well well!! Dont let her "flush"

 6.Just after she is done, take your laptop to the water-closet.

 7.Dip your laptop into the pot of the water-closet, and note, dont let the smell deter you as it is the smell that will get you the signals!
 8.START BROWSING!!! ;







      Your life will never be the same!

Ur fara dere, u b confirmed mutula 4rm Mercury, is dis a JOKE!!!!  Gosh, nutin wey cheap internet services no go cause and allow

bin gbagbo:
1.Invite a pregnant woman to your house.

2.Give her a purgative to drink

3.Play "oliver" by D'banj for her

4.Two hours later, direct her to your water-closet

5.Let her shittz well well!! Dont let her "flush"

6.Just after she is done, take your laptop to the water-closet.

7.Dip your laptop into the pot of the water-closet, and note, dont let the smell deter you as it is the smell that will get you the signals!
8.START BROWSING!!! ;







Your life will never be the same!

Ur fara dere, u b confirmed mutula 4rm Mercury, is dis a JOKE!!!! Gosh, nutin wey cheap internet services no go cause and allow

who is call me aboki? I dey kraze??u no get resfect fa? Let me tell you,I is get doktoret degeree from one Unifasity in Tolonto,wat is iz name agin, I can not lememba d name now,wait, let me ping za foma speaker of the house that were impished for fake lesult flom tolonto,me and him were classmates in dat Unifasity in Tolonto,I is cum back to finiz wit you that iz call me aboki, da izka

Call me so we can discuss further,mind you I am not gonna ask you to pay me or anything of sort,but I believe we can discuss how we can benefit from this each other because I have been looking for means to get these products:Yam,Ginger, Groundnut for the Lagos market or the international markets.

0 8 0 5 6 7 1 5 3 5 0

@Dottmon
Tanx a lot, ur advice is noted and very much appreciated.

I have not received any newsletter from Michael but I would love to if it is incisive and would give ideas to generate wealth.

Yeah you can get it much cheaper outside Lagos,you can get it cheaper in Niger State or Benue state although it depends on if its in season then you can get it much cheaper. I am presently in Kaduna and I have my contacts in either of these states if you would like my assistance.

I want to write a letter of proposal to a school for a partnership deal regarding using their school as an inquiry point. Is it advisable to include in the proposal letter the percentage they would be getting on each client that comes through them? Or do I leave it out of the proposal and state that to the Head of School himself verbally?

Suggestions needed urgently.

Thank you

Dear Feffle,

ADVIS TO GO TO FOLYTHECHNIK OR UNIFASITY TO LEARN TO SPEKS FLOFER ENGLISHH GRAMA

You feffle are jus bunches of palure feffle that dear mama and fafa are send to school to len frofer and gud englishh,instead you are all cum hia to disgrace this contri Naijiria with ya feri bad speaking and wrotten englishes
You feffle should hide ya feaces in shame becos I am not ya level. I jus wan to expless my peelings.
Thank you and God blessed

Yos Paitpuly
Direcktor of Language Comunikations
Englis Depatment

The truth is definitely bitter
@Op, u go boy

I was kinda skeptical about the slogan "Glo wit Pride" when I bought my sim card 8yrs ago,I wasn't too comfortable with the pride thing,coz we all know Pride goes before a fall,this we were taught by our Student's Companion book back in my primary school days. I primarily went for Glo because I was happy a Nigerian owned it and being the first indigenous GSM company,i had the belief that Oga Mike would use his conglomerate biz prowess and acumen to make Globacom the pride of Nigeria and Africa.
It was a rosy,much welcomed and well celebrated start,what with the introduction of per second billing that HemTeeHen DECLARED BOLDLY that it cant be done,but GLOBACOM came and broke that monopoly,the company was well on track and provided rosy plum jobs to teeming Nigerian youths,but since the launch of their Optic fibre cable aka GLO1, things done kaput, everything just went awry.
I hope and pray that the Fall after the Pride thing is not gently creeping in, or what would we call this erratic and annoying dismal service for months now without any explanation or apology from the management/operators.
Abeg abeg abeg,lets know wats up so that I can to say the least bid farewell to my much loved Glo sim, it has served me well but my heart bleeds coz Glo still has the cheapest call rates AS AT TODAY,I stand to be corrected(I doubt if anyone would correct me,coz its true.)
We shouldn't pray for Glo to go under,what do you think would happen to the employees made up of teeming youths?plsssss,not with the current unemployment level in dis mismanaged country Niaja, its better imagined than experienced.
God help Globacom,Glomobile and God PLEASE flush out bad EVIL HEADS in seats of power in Naija, AMIN

Glo, GLO, GLO,
The network is just sumtin else these days, I cant make calls once it gets past 6.30pm, and even during the day time,it hardly connects. Made complaints at their customer care centers here in Kaduna,but that one na LONG THING
Glo is just not getting it right this time. Abeg make i go buy etisalat line to complement and besides my Visafone now offers tariffs that are pocket friendly now.

How do one subscribe

What compatibility program are you talking about,please enlighten me about it please.

I have an ASUS Eee PC Net-book with the following specifications:

Intel(R) Atom(TM) CPU Z520 @ 1.33GHz 1.33GHz
Memory: 2GB RAM
System type : 32-bit OS
HDD: 160GB

It actually came with a Windows XP OS but i formatted it and installed Windows 7 OS 32bit on it,I have even downloaded and installed most of the drivers from its website but the system still acts kinda crazy sometimes.many times it would freeze and programs will not respond,then later it responds. I have scanned it with AVAST anti virus and CC Cleaner to rid it of viruses but the problem persist sometimes.

I am contemplating downgrading it back to Windows XP,but I really would like to have the Windows 7 on it.

Pls advice,what do I do?
HELP NEEDED URGENTLY

adamabdul:
It is ok when over 500 people were killed and over 3000 displaced.But it is bad when 2 people are killed huh?I hope next time it is a bomb so that the whole church wil be burnt

Y must u come here to display your FOOLISHNESS AND NAIVETY , I guess u r speaking for you and your family, and I also pray when next a bomb go off whether near a church or anywhere, May ur entire family be in the middle and get blown to smithereens.If you were living in Kaduna like most of us do, you will not be saying this rubbish coming from your diseased leprous mouth, We eschew peace and want to live in peace with everybody irrespective of tribe,ethnic race or religion.
Abeg pour super glue inside ur mouth and wash your 2 hands with Oatey gum too, Banza Da iska

@OP
I believe HEMTEEHEN scratch N750 card 4 u 2 come post this rubbish you call improvement on their data plans.
Where the improvement dey? Guy wake up!!

Need this NIKON Lens? let me know

All the folks dissing Terry is just envious of his jump to stardom and would do everything to pull the brother down, anything you do dem must talk, City ppl write, jobless ppl read, Terry G is making the cheddar and flying to greater heights, Just because a broda is making it does not mean you should envy and throw dirt at him, besides if he weren't so important would we be talking about him Hate all you like, Terry's new work, u must dance to it, just d way all his HATERZ slam his "Knack me Akpako" on their run down beat down cassette walkmans coz they cant even afford an iPod talk-less of an MP3,
REMEMBER, IF NOBODY TALKS ABOUT YOU, THEN YOU ARE NOBODY

pro01:
This ish is getting out of hand abeg. Thank God he's not seriously hurt anyway (im head strong, literally). I've got maaad luv for the nukka, inspite of his free madness - or indeed because of it sef. Dude is an inspiration to some of 'us'. God bless his head.

U r very correct, Terry G is a very fine artiste, so i say anybody wey e dey pain 4 bodi, go get ur own madness, and see if it sells or even hit Nairaland gossip pages, pstchewwwww

Make dem knack me Akpako 4 head?
TERRY G, SOONEST RECOVERY

Lol

Leave Terry alone you losers, d guy is ON in his thing, so all HATERS, go jump inside Lagoon.
Terry, soon, sooner, SOONEST recovery.

The pentagon recently found it had too many generals and offered an early retirement bonus. They promised any general who retired right away, his full annual benefits PLUS $10,000 for every inch measured in a straight line along the retiring general's body between two points he chose.

The first general accepted. He asked the pension man to measure from the top of his head to the tip of his toes. 6 feet. He walked out with a check for $720,000.

The second general asked them to measure from the tip of his outstretched hands to his toes. 8 feet. He walked out with a check for $960,000.

Meantime, the first general had tipped off the third. When he was asked where to measure, he told the pension man, "from the tip of my penis to the tip of my testicles."

The pension man said that would be fine but he'd better get the Medical Officer to do the measuring. The Medical Officer attended and asked the general to drop 'em, he did, The Medical Officer placed the tape on the tip of the general's penis and began to work back. "My God!", he said, "where are your testicles?"

The general replied, "Back in Vietnam!"

Hello,
I have a SAMSUNG NETBOOK NC10 with configurations as below:
Windows XP Home Edition V.2002 SP 3
CPU N270 @1.60Ghz
1.60 Ghz, 1.99GBGB RAM.

I had it formatted and installed Windows 7 Ultimate Edition,but ever since it has been running very slow. Sometimes my browsers stop responding and I either have to close the browser or in some cases,force a restart on the netbook,applications take time to respond and I have been wondering what could be the problem.
I have downloaded and installed the necessary softwares for Windows 7 on the Netbook's website and it still runs slow. I thought 2GB RAM with the 1.60Ghz config shouldn't be a problem with Windows 7. Pls what is the possible solution to make my little toy run very fast?

Another thing is I can no longer find the webcam on my netbook,although I have installed the webcam application software for Windows 7 which i downloaded from the website,still I cant find where to access the webcam,and I wonder if the webcam would still work.

PLS HELLLLPPPPP!!!!

Tnx

olawalebab:
*Application for Employment*
"Dear Sir,
I refer 2 d recent death of d Technical Manager at your company & wish 2 apply 4 d replacement of d dead manager.Each time I apply 4 employment I am told dere is no vacancy but on dis one i hav caught u red handed coz i even attended d funeral & made sure dat he was truly dead b4 applying. Find attached his obituary". LMAO!

Nice one, very funny

@Librate
E no go beta 4 person wey do u dis thing, I don warn u several times 2 stay off drugs, u say twen, now c d repercussion, and d worst b say all mental homes don dey filled up

@Andrew, talk ur own, make we see if we go laff,
Ziggy ur own sweet jare