₦airaland Forum

TheSkyIsBlue:
My Sister Is About To Commit A Serious Taboo All In The Name Of Marriage

Hello Nairalanders!

Please ignore any typographical or grammatical error. I just want to pour it out the way it is in my heart.

I am seriously confused and worried about what is happening in my family and I will appreciate your candid advice.

There is this guy my sister has been in a relationship with for over seven years now. so he actually asked her hand in marriage and decided to come see my parents for introduction, about some months ago. My family decided to take their time to find out more about the guys family background as is required in Igbo tradition.

After several questions asked, my family came to find out that the guy is an Osu (an outcast). On knowing this, everybody in my family told my sister to cut ties with him and discontinue the relationship because it is a big taboo to get married to an Osu in my place . If you do, no family member or friend will attend your wedding or even have anything to do with you again.

But my sister refused to listen to anybody claiming she really loves the guy, that they have been together for a very long time and that she is not getting younger anymore (mind you, she is in her early thirties). Everybody (my parents and extended family members) tried to talk her out of it but she still didn't listen.

After much pressure and her continues insistence, my dad decided to give them his blessings, although against his wish (my dad is actually not really deep into tradition). Now the guy has done all the traditional rights and paid for her dowry. Their wedding is coming up soon.

But the problem now is, according to tradition and from what I heard, if she was allowed to go with the guy without my dad giving them his blessings, the stigma would have just been on her and she alone would have been considered Osu, since she insisted to continue with the marriage. But now that my dad has given them his blessings, it is considered that all of us (her siblings) will also have that link of Osu too. Except if she decide to put an end to the relationship and discontinue with the wedding, which I don't think my sister is ready to do.

I am really worried and depressed about it, cause I don't want anything that will affect me tomorrow when I want to get married just because of my sister's mistakes.

I will really like to get opinions and sincere advice especially from those that are familiar with tradition, cause I'm seriously bothered. Thanks!

Techidence:
There has been many reports to cases like this. Almost all big tech companies are guilty of tapping users' information without users' consent. From Apple to Facebook, etc.

victorava:
Hello Nairalanders

Two weeks back, my friend was apprehended by DSS officers from his residence in Lagos state and we have not heard from him.

I was driving out with him, immediately they saw us, they surrounded us and started asking questions. We now discovered that it was my friend that they were looking for. They collected his phones and followed him to his room to change his clothes. When I asked them what his offense was, they told me that they would like to ask him one or two questions.

They told me to meet them at their office and when I got there, I was not allowed access to their office. The officer at the gate told me that there was no such arrest. It was on Friday. I went there on Monday together with his wife and brother which was the following week, we were still denied access. They officer at the gate told us that if he's truly here that nothing will happen to him. He told us that anyone who is apprehended is not allowed to see anybody until after investigation.

We paid a Lawyer to go there the following day and the Lawyer eventually gained access, he was told that my friend was taken to Abuja the following day they arrested him.

We contacted a Lawyer in Abuja to go there and he was not allowed to see my friend. They told him to submit an application that they would get back to him. After few days, they did not contact him. He decided to go there this week and was denied access.

My friend has a wife and two kids, the wife has not been herself since this incident happened. She's been traumatized. She just wants to be sure if her husband is truly there.

Please Nairalander, I need your advice on the necessary steps I should take to be able to see my friend. Sorry for the long write up.

Admin please help me move this to front page, it is very urgent.

BigGuyMan:
No its not advisable to marry all these expired old newspapers.

Go for young under 26 fresh laps all these old newspapers should go to Congo or Venezuela to look for their husband's.

Don't ever marry any lady above 27. They are all expired and useless

ijewejones:


For me "No" because fresh single ladies still full town...what do i know


Here to learn more..

madridguy:
Islamic view: Very good and you also get big reward for doing so.

Street wise: You won't have the fear of her going behind to see her ex like single mother.

The koko be say you must be sure she's really in love with you make he no be say she just dey look for who she go take train her kids...don't get me wrong, there's reward training and helping orphans too but no one will be happy to know say person dey hold him for work.

Have you also discussed this with your parents?

mezarddinny:
this vehicle for 50 million? even the latest model no sey sell for that money


see as dem dey pour satchel water on king head, he suppose finish work by knocking the head na

ursullalinda:
He is now eligible to share the national cake......Congrats sir

Gazzy88:
Abraham Lincoln never attended any school, yet he ruled America.

Flye:
You think success is about certificates?
What have the PhDs and Educated people voted in the past achieved with their certificates?

Average Nigerians always set wrong priorities.

Yebosola:
Tambuwal doesn't fancy APC?? Goodness,Tambuwal is a typical polical Olosho of the highest order,from PDP-APC back to PDP,and is that one u claimed doesn't fancy APC,I laugh in Swahili

holaxi:
My girlfriend and I have being together for almost three years now. We've had all the moments the good ,the bad and the ugly.

But recently she met a guy who asked her out, she refused his advances but the guy and her spend so much time on calls and chatting which I don't really like.

I've talked to her so many times about it but if she listens for a week the next week they are back in business.

Last week we were chatting and she just went offline I tried calling her to know what's up only for her number to be busy for like 20 mins. When she came back online and I told her she said she wasn't on call with anyone.

When I probed her further she said she wanted a two weeks break that I complain too much and I don't trust her.

I apologized to her so peace could reign but since then I've started losing interest in her.