Porn0addict:
I had to create another account to type this.

Help guys!!! I am a 25 years old guy who is seriously addicted to pornography. I spent 5 hours watching pornography and masturbating yesterday. 2 hours in the afternoon. 3 hours at night.

It started 10 years ago with a porn DVD a friend lent me after I finished secondary school. Since then I have been in this mess. It affected my results in the University. During normal school days I miss some lectures due to masturbation. When it is exam time, I partake in it even more. Thereby I procrastinate reading till the day before exam or some hours before an exam starts. I was very brilliant in secondary school and even in my Part 1 days.

Even during my NYSC days, I continued.

I am a freelancer and I work from home. I was supposed to be working on projects worth hundreds of dollars with a various deadlines but I spent 5 hours out of that time watching porn. Working at home has been a sort of disadvantage like I have power on my laptop and I have access to good internet too.

I don't think working outside will solve it. When I was on 400 level IT. I wake up as early as 5 am to get to work early. Yet I can watch porn from 11 pm to 4 am. Valuable time that I could have spent perfecting my web design and programming skills. So, I sleep in the bus in the morning and the evening. I also sleep at work during my break time then. Getting an outside job won't solve it.

I am an introvert who hardly talk to girls. I am kind of shy and hardly look anyone in the face. But I am financially comfortable, average looking with taller than average height. I dress okay but not flamboyant. Girls try to talk to me at times but I don't respond well due to my shyness.

I feel like an hypocrite. Among my friends, I go to church the most and they have a kind of respect for me since I don't sleep around, drink or indulge in other vices. But I masturbate almost everyday. These guys may not sleep with their girlfriends for a week. But me, I hardly go without masturbating. Deep inside me, I know I am far worse than them.

When I gave my life to Christ, the urge went away for about 2 weeks and I was very happy with my life generally. But I fell back to it again. A lot of times, I feel so guilty that I can't pray. I was one of those mocking our chaplain in secondary school when he talked about the hazards of masturbation. This was because I hadn't engaged in it then and I didn't know the consequences.

Now I am so unproductive. I used to be very innovative and creative, brimming with several ideas that a lot of people look up to me. But now, I hardly have time for anything. It's just from one deadline to another. I know I can finish my jobs comfortably but pornography takes a huge chunk of my time. Plus after you masturbate, you get depressed and you don't have that deep motivation to work fast and accomplish lots of things in little time.

It's been 10 years now. My life is wasting away. I have started facing that marriage pressure from my parents. On the outside, I look perfectly okay and many people admire me. They come to me for advise and financial aid. But on the inside I am dying. I know I have a lot of potential in me. I know I am not meant to be mediocre. I don't want to live that average life of just earning some money, marriage and death. I know I am meant to impact a lot of people. I had a lot of plans that went dead.

Sometimes I even have suicidal thoughts. I feel death will be better rather than this misery. I have tried a lot of things but I can't just stop. The worst part is pornography make me see women as sexual objects some times. A lot of Nigerian men also hold this viewpoint but I know it is terribly wrong.

Sometimes after listening to Christian tapes and messages, the urge goes away for two days but it comes again and I fall. I don't to fall at all.

Maybe I will just start listening to Christian tapes and music 24/7. But I can't concentrate on work if I do that. Or I could just take 2 hour breaks to listen to Godly messages.

Guys please what do you think. I need serious help. You could be saving a brother from a miserable life or even suicide.

Thanks in anticipation of your response. Feel free to bash and insult me. I need it.

cc

Lalasticlala
Seun
Ishilove
Mynd44

Khostlybeauty18:
So.... erhm....there's this guy that approach me for my number sometime back, I didn't give him and I think I responded rudely kind of...I was really tired that day...But since then, I've had this huge crush on him...We make eye contacts alot wheneva we're at the same place, but I can't see him making another attempt to come...Now m leaving the area soon....How Do I Get Him?

Green222:
Please Candid advise needed.

On the 8th Dec. 2017, I was gisting with my Best friend (we have been friends now for 17years) about a guy I dated for 7years. We parted ways because he was a chronic womanizer and was not ready to change. I have caught him on several occasions with other women in action; I have cried myself to sleep because of his actions and in-actions. His actions affected my grades while in school. my relationship with him was well known by his family and mine. The relationship almost caused me my life during an abortion I did for him; he never abandoned me, he was with me thru the ordeal. He is a loving fellow that can do anything for me and defend me anywhere. He can go Xtra miles to please me but that does not stop him from cheating on me. The emotional trauma was becoming too heavy for me to bear, I quite the relationship.

Back to my friend. On this particular day, we decided to search the guy on Facebook, we saw him and my friend sent a friend request. He accepted the request the same day and they started chatting. He requested for her mobile number which she gave to him and they started talking on the phone. The guy requested to meet with her during Xmas as we are all from the same locality. She agreed to the request even though she knew she will be traveling home. I was still in the picture of their discussion at this stage.

On the 22nd, my friend travel to spend the Xmas with her brother's family in the West while I traveled to our Hometown in the North Central. We constantly speak on the phone and she never mentioned her communications with my Ex again. Only for her to call me yesterday that she has changed her travel plans. She has traveled back home on the request of my Ex to meet him in our hometown; they have met and he has introduced her to his family and she has done same and both families accepted them. Their wedding has been fixed for March 2018. She said she has asked my EX to call me

She called this morning to asked if my Ex had called to inform me of his intentions to marry her. I said NO. She said my Ex said he does not have the courage to talk to me.

I feel betrayed by my friend's actions. I have a lot of friends that know my Ex and I and also know me and my Girl friend.

Please I need Candid advise on her to handle this issue

Your story is not adding up well oh my sister. 1st there's absolutely nothing wrong with your best friend marrying your ex. Is a free world.

2nd- How can you have a boyfriend of 7yrs and a best friend of 17yrs and they have not seen or met each other in the course of both friendship?

Its your story anyway!

pleasantplaces:
Ok.
Please i take God beg tonto and Churchill, this is 2018. make una let us rest na. since 2015 abi 16 you people have been in our faces with your boyfriend/mr x, marriage, drama life, divorce, after divorce drama.
Marriage don end since last year, now 2018 you guys have started again.

mtcheeeew!

asuustrike2009:

Last paragraph got me laughing. Their extravagant lifestyles had made the essence of private defeated. If not it is useful for evangelism. Mind you evangelism isn't restricted to Nigeria alone

asuustrike2009:

I think you too generalistic. Not all churches allow their pastors to own private jets. It all boils down to the structure of the church. Owning a private jet isn't bad as many people see it. It is very easy to condemn from outside until you are inside. The jet are used for church programs especially when the pastors need to get to different locations the same day. The cost in waiting to book ticket and other logistics are saved. However, it is possible for a pastor to be payroll. The essence is to curtail their excesses since many are living extravagant lifestyles. Many churches do place their pastors on payroll. To me it is the best thing to do but your pastor must be comfortable. At least he should be able to cater for the needs of his family. Many churches lack good structures that is why their pastors behave as they lack. Thank God for most orthodox churches and catholic church were structures are in place. This is lacking in many Pentecostal churches because their founders are the boss in charge.

Harrynight:
Shepherd and sheep who should pay or feed who?

was Jesus get paid?

Peter, John, Timothy, Apostle Paul and other early christians who were taking the lead in the early churches then were they paid?

Op! they (Pastors) are not meant to be paid!

Lirqur:
Make dem still chill. Shebi dem dey form slay queen now. Isaiah 4:1 go soon fall on them.

"In that day seven women will take hold of one man and say, "We will eat our own food and provide our own clothes; only let us be called by your name. Take away our disgrace!" Na then una know say slay king sef get value

Salaam.

coolcharm:
Chai.... 'Afraid' dey catch me whalai.

You mean.... The two boys kolobi this girl all through the night?

Na person future wife so o. If at all she hasn't started praying for a rich and God fearing man already.

Person go just marry ashewo him no go know.

God forbid!