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Davland's Posts

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EventsRe: Four Sisters, Medical Doctors Marry On The Same Day (Photos) by Davland(m): 11:00am On Jul 31, 2016
Dis is wat d parent meant cheesy

CelebritiesRe: Bidemi Kosoko To Toyin: Let Them Say Whatever They Like, All You Did Was To Help by Davland(m): 8:53am On Jul 31, 2016
Toyin's leg caught my attention
RomanceRe: My Funny But Painful Breakup Story by Davland(m): 12:27am On Jul 31, 2016
& she neva smell sch gate

Dat part got me grin
RomanceRe: Someone Sent This To Me On 'whatsapp' & Could Save A Female Life by Davland(m): 12:11am On Jul 31, 2016
Hope dey listen
RomanceRe: Why Do Women Only Want A Guy They've Rejected When He Starts Dating another girl by Davland(m): 11:58pm On Jul 30, 2016
Sexxkillz:
[color=#000030]Simple: [/color]
Seconded
RomanceRe: The Wrong Step I Took In Love. by Davland(m): 2:16pm On Jul 26, 2016
iLegend:
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

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Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

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Breathe breathe breathe breathe

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Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha


Listen guys, breaking a girl's heart is not good. When I got mine I felt like assassinating somebody.

Laugh again.

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Alright, let's be serious. Sweetheart, the journey is not easy.

A short story I went through.

A girl lost her mother in a an auto crash. She cried and cried. After the burial, a guy she met on 2go and fell in love with told her he slept with another girl and he was sorry.

This girl was so fúcking heartbroken. She was 18 an a virgin.

So, I asked her a simple research question.
iLegend: I know you're going through pains right now, but I have a question for you.
She: What's the question?
iLegend: Which is more painful. Losing your mum or the heartbreak you're going through now?
She: Paused and pondered! You don't know how hurt I Am right now. This one hurts more.
iLegend: I opened my mouth like Sam Loco and couldn't alter a word for some seconds.

This girl loves her mum. The only thing she doesn't like about her mum was "lack of freedom." They never let her express her sexual urges. So, her best friend was másturbation.

(As a guy man, I needed to initiate her cuz the supposed boyfriend had already misbehaved).

After some days I asked her if she had másturbated before and she confidently told me she can NEVER do that. She's very religious. (In my mind — iffa hear or agree make I know wetin cause am).

So, I decided to change my plans and played like a sucker to catch a sucker.

While on phone I told her I want to stop másturbation and how do I go about it. She said she too wants to stop, but it's very difficult. (When you open up, a woman will open up too). She said we should put it in prayers. She forgot she denied this same question some weeks ago.

Inside my mind who wan pray with you. Na fúck I wan fúck you.

She gave me her flash drive to copy some PDFs and videos. I copied them but refused to return it. After some days she came to my house to collect her flash. The moment she got in I grabbed her as if I was about to rape her and launched and kiss on her lips. Then, I stopped and warned her NEVER to come to my house to kiss or rape me. She wanted to caution me, but I had already taken her power. This girl was so hórny after some minute. I could see her pupil dilate. I knew I have created a monster, but I ignored her body language.

(She's cute, got shapes and very religious as the parents).

After some days she came to my house uninvited. I kissed her but didn't do anything. She wanted to KILL me with anger for not proceeding (I was only teasing).

She left unhappy.

Some days later she came to my house looking all hórny and frustrated. I knew what she wanted.

She said to me, "Do you remember what you told me about hating girls who are not BOLD enough by taking the bull by the horn?" I concurred and she said she's not that kinda girl. Before I knew it, she had grabbed me and started kissing me.

(Crazy parts skipped).
I tried opening her door, but it was locked. My parents and siblings were at home and they always love to check on me. I hurriedly try to insert my dick but it was locked, so I gave up.

A month later she came to my house and my thing went in straight. I felt bad and heartbroken too. Someone had already opened it. Now, she'll associate her first with someone else. It sucks.

The moral of the story is: enjoy your heartbreak, cuz we've all been there. Though, this isn't my main heartbreak. I'll call this one jealous chest break.

halfricanadian, let's start something new. No strings attached. The problem is: you'll fall in love along the line. I don't want I hurt you the second time, so forget it.

Please asshole-men, STOP hurting women, it's bad and God go judge una o! I don talk my own. Stop giving women hope when you want nothing but sex

Wipe your tears my sweet darling.
Mummy, boys go SUFFER.

iLegend
Here he comes again
RomanceRe: by Davland(m):
iLegend:
There's a way the brain interprets information or texts. While reading, after 4 lines the brain will ask some questions.

Brain: Sir, are you sure you like what you're reading?
You: I never dey sure o! But make I no quit yet.
Brain: Sir, are you learning something new from this write-up?
You: E bi like o!
Brain: Sir, sorry for disturbing your brain. Does the write-up make you laugh or smile?
You: Abeg, you dey disturb me. Wait make I read finish.
Brain: Sir, are you still reading?
You: Wow! Op, When you dey drop part 2? This is one one the best posts I have read so far.

That's how the brain probes us when we read. The job of a good writer is to master how to navigate around and fulfill the curiosity of the brain, then leave the editing for proof readers to correct errors if you want it published.

Wait a minute, I'm writing an article already. I thinks I'll write a full article on this.
.
RomanceRe: by Davland(m):
[quote author=iLegend post=47895439]...continuation 2

...MEHN! I was almost in Heaven. I never wanted it to end. I felt hórny and sleepy at the same time.

When she finished (the message) I got up and felt relieved and pain-free. It was as if I was a new born baby. (Massage sweet abeg).

She paid and we left the place. We bounced from one shopping mall to another (she converted some thousands dollars to Malaysian Ringgit. I bought a white suit and shoe — (see image below. That iLegend on suit — mehn! I hate suit), a black blazer and different brands if shoes — some pictures are not there).

We went to an open night bar and ordered one of the biggest fish. She doesn't eat much, but she bought things as if we were celebrating something (Omo when you fúck a woman well she go pay you back with favors and even with her last borrowed or stolen cash). Be warned: I bought those shoes and suits myself. As a student, me I get small money too na and I always spend them judiciously NOT pussiciously #winks.

We couldn't finish the food and it was a lot to dispose. We didn't touch he fish because there was no space in our stomachs for the fish. (I hate to waste food and the fish was roasted with spices, so I ain't gonna waste that). I told her to package the fish and we're taking it to the hotel room. We took some pictures, rode a camel and lots of adventurous shíts like that. (Women love adventures).

We went to a night museum and so many "attraction" centers. We got back to the hotel around 11PM exhausted.

Time for sex:

One thing led to another we had a misunderstanding in the hotel room. I can't remember how it started, but it just happened.

Whenever she's hórny that's how she behaves and I don't take bullshíts behaviors — every little thing will cause trouble and I'm a trouble evangelist for that matter, haha.

She angrily stormed the bathroom and showered. The AC was too cold, so I covered myself (náked) with the duvet/comforter and switched on the TV while browsing with the hotel's high-speed WiFi. She finished taking her bath and walked in náked with her pointed apple breast and fat ass. I entered too and took my bath.

I came out and saw her folded at the edge of the bed with more than half of the duvet on her body. As a náked man, I took the remote, reduced the AC, and used the other remote to switch off the television, then folded myself too at the other edge and slept. The bed was a king size bed, so the center was empty. (Wicked Love in Malaysia will be the name of the movie).

I couldn't hold it, so I woke around 2AM and went inside the bathroom and played with my James Bond's riffle — I shot two bullets. grin We woke the next morning as enemies. No sex, no touching, no gisting, no cuddling, no hugging and no kissing. Hmm! She dey form Porsche me I dey form Lamborghini, so...

typing...
[/..
RomanceRe: by Davland(m): 2:47am On Jul 26, 2016
Really helpful

Can't believe I read it all through cheesy
NYSCRe: Corpers' Lodge In Bori, Rivers Attacked By Armed Men, One Injured by Davland(m): 2:21pm On Jul 25, 2016
What did they want to steal frm corper's sef huh
RomanceRe: by Davland(m):
iLegend:
Hahaha! Is she good looking?
It's easy naaaaa!

Be naughty and don't reply always. Guys always rush to reply girls and it's boring. Learn to reply some msgs after a day or two. I do reply some messages after a year self. I do it a lot.

So use my SMH system (sexual misinterpretation (with) humor). Chat like a bad boy. At night ask her what she's doing with her hands. She'll probably say "chatting" and you you'll say, "Hmm! Only chatting? Naughty girls don't just chat with their hands o! They use it for other things too." wink

Just be naughty and with an "I don't give a fúck if offend her or not attitude." Offending a girl is the best thing a real man or a player can ever do, because he'll convert her anger to good emotions and love.

Don't ever start a message with hi or hello. Go STRAIGHT to the catchy punchline.

Sometimes the first thing I send a girl in the morning is "fúck you and your sexy lips — I can't wait to bite 'em. Hope no one raped you in your dreams last night?"

Boring guys will start with: how was your night?

Listen, I have mastered the system, so I don't memorize I just say what's on my mind. Some days I chat boring chats.there are 7 girls I haven't replied their messages, cuz they're too boring.

They keep sending me "how was your night?, have you eaten? Them be my mother? I want caring people, but not too caring. Even my mum pisses me off sometimes, cuz she's too caring. She treats me like a Prince. I love her to pieces, but she should reduce the amount of attention she gives me. When the love is too much it gets the opposite effect.

Chat naughty and if you get stuck I might help if I have spare time.

Now you can reply her with:
You: I only know of Dami Duro by Davido, are you Davido's cousin?
She: Confused, laughs or ask a strange question:
You: Hahaha, See ya head naughty girl. I heard you're married?
She: Nooo o! Where you hear that one? Or whatever comes out of her mouth.
You: I was only pulling your legs — Oya close your legs make I go see wetin I no suppose see. grin

Improvise my brother. I have at least 10 different replies if I were in your shoe.

Keep it fun and naughty, then don't reply when she asks another question. Go offline and reply in some minutes, an hour or two with something naughty. Once in a while reply like a pastor and act all spiritual and Godly. Then, turn naughty again.

Interchange from SMH (the naughty chat) to matured guys chatting. (The boring chat).


It's in you. Just follow your instinct and no worry if you fúck up, cuz it's allowed. Man wey no fúck up no be man at all.
.
RomanceRe: . by Davland(m): 5:28pm On Jul 23, 2016
"for a successful relationship."

cheesy cheesy
RomanceRe: by Davland(m): 2:05pm On Jul 23, 2016
iLegend(f)

But i thought iLegend na male oo grin
CrimeRe: This Man Died Inside A Taxi In Ilorin This Morning, Let's Always Prepare (photo) by Davland(m): 11:10am On Jul 23, 2016
admax:
RIP to the man.

OP: You can't post about death and still want us to congratulate you on your birthday on the same thread! How do we greet you; RIP then Happy Birthday or Happy Birthday then RIP? angry
I hail u oo
RomanceRe: by Davland(m): 11:46pm On Jul 22, 2016
So true.




Always on point
RomanceRe: This Relationship Advise Might Save You Part 2 by Davland(m): 5:30pm On Jul 20, 2016
I hope dey concur cheesy
PoliticsRe: Women Protest In Ondo Over Dino Melaye’s Attack On Remi Tinubu by Davland(m): 8:03am On Jul 19, 2016
Not again

RomanceRe: An App Worth Having In Ur Phone For Players.... by Davland(m): 8:01am On Jul 19, 2016
Vincent41:
for now its an apk fime meaning it works in Andriod,will look for BB own...
Ok Thanks. Patiently waiting
PoliticsRe: Remi Tinubu Supporters Protesting In Ikeja, Lagos by Davland(m): 11:47am On Jul 18, 2016
undecided

RomanceRe: An App Worth Having In Ur Phone For Players.... by Davland(m):
huh
FamilyRe: Would You Choose A Good Marriage Over Career? by Davland(m): 7:58pm On Jul 12, 2016
100% good marriage cheesy
FamilyRe: Would You Choose A Good Marriage Over Career? by Davland(m): 7:57pm On Jul 12, 2016
100%. Will go 4 a good marriage cheesy
SportsRe: Felix Ifeanyi Nwosu Displays AK-47 Rifle On Facebook, Fans Blast Him by Davland(m): 9:41am On Jul 10, 2016
As he don display it

D rebels will ve to get a superior gun b4 going to his place.
RomanceRe: Am Scared,she Just Gives it To Me No Strings Attached. by Davland(m): 1:46pm On Jul 08, 2016
cyberguy72:
she can suck my nippillles non stop for like 30mins while moaning.At times i fear she's just sucking my star away to oblivion
Lolz. Dat means u re now starless grin
RomanceRe: Why I Became A Player TRUE STORY!!!!! by Davland(m):
.
EventsRe: John, Peter And Jamie Obidiegwu's Birthday (Photos) by Davland(m): 2:01pm On Jul 07, 2016
Twin,triplet is gud if d parent has money


Cos using dem to beg is not romantic @all
RomanceRe: Just Because She Gave Me One Round... by Davland(m): 11:08pm On Jul 05, 2016
Lolz. Den send her 2950 grin.
RomanceRe: If You Meet These Creepy Guys, Run And Never Date Them! by Davland(m): 8:50pm On Jul 05, 2016
Wetin una con want sef undecided
CultureRe: Oluwo Of Iwo, Akanbi At African Fashion Week 2016 by Davland(m): 11:17am On Jul 04, 2016
I think I sighted Ooni's wife
RomanceRe: My Little Collection Of Crazy Memes----some Stolen BTW. by Davland(m): 1:34am On Jul 04, 2016
tongue

Forum GamesRe: Who Would You Call At Gun Point? by Davland(m): 6:51pm On Jul 03, 2016
Na dat man wey owe me money ooo

E go think say I wan ask about his gbèsè
RomanceRe: See What A Girl Accidentally Sent To A Guy (screenshots) by Davland(m):
It remind me of d day I sent "Hi dear" to my Area Manager grin
Him -Who is ur dear?
Me- sorry sir,d msg was meant for my younger sister

Like I ve any younger sis cheesy

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 (of 18 pages)