₦airaland Forum

vivianc: The lasT paragraph of your posT is so on poinT!
Why puT yourself in a posiTion where you would feel obligated To marry someone or someone would feel obligaTed To marry you even when eiTher party has reservaTions?

Not accepTable by me, I don't put myself in such situaTion neiTher do I allow such.

This guys case they started dating from High School. They were also family friends

So it was like the two families were already together sef.

In that situation how do you pull out without looking like a bad person

chaircover: Im starting this thread after reading a about someone who waited a number of years for a proposal and it got me thinking and So I have a few questions.
How long is a reasonable time to wait for him to propose.

It depends on the age of the people involved, the economy, several circumstance too. E.g a girl of 22 might be scared when a guy propose sef, but a girl of 27 is probably ready

When do you start giving ultimatums.

You can give ultimatums as you want when you are ready to see things from the guys side. If he doesnt have a steady income your ultimatums mean nothing unless you wan suffer.

Should you give ultimatums at all?

Probably NOT cos why coerce another person into a life decision if you are close enough and you know he doesnt fit into your timeline hint at it and start pulling back.

Must it always be the man that proposes?

A Woman too can propose as long as she knows what it entails and has the basics covered

What if the lady doesn't want to accept his proposal?

What are her reasons for not accepting? E.g Its useless proposing to a girl travelling for her masters when you are not even certain of what would happen to her there

Would you feel resentment if it takes him so long to propose and you had to give him an ultimatum before he finally proposes

Most people would feel resentment if they felt they were armtwisted into a life decision.

What are good enough reasons for a man to wait a long time before he proposes

Several things, Love is not enough to make a marriage work and it depends on their life plans. Economy, Career, and life plans e.g A guy who wants to travel has no business proposing until he has concrete plans of how the bride would be with him. .

Do all men propose or do some just assume that the woman will marry him

It depends on what you mean by propose. To me proposal is sending my parents to meet your parents. And making wedding plans. I can give several rings to different girls but I value my parents so much that I wont make a fool of them meeting a family I only intend to play with their daughter.

How can a woman extract that proposal without the man knowing that he is being coerced?

Yes . A girl once told me if a lady is over 27 and a guy isnt proposing she can do the proposal and one way is the PREGNANCY way which works with Nigerians

Do women feel vulnerable in the marriage if they didn't get a proposal before getting married to the man

Thats putting unnecessary relevance on the proposal, A guy proposes and he doesn't meet your family, He doesn't make plans for both families to meet and fix a wedding date is a useless proposal. Once a guy decides to meet your family that should supersede any proposal.

Proposals are not binding by any law.

Do many proposals often follow the "hollywood" style with man on knee, ring in ice cream etc or have people been watching too much tv and the reality is different

If you intend to have a Hollywood wedding then so be it. One of my friends proposed to his girl some weeks ago. And after the paparazi event with the surprise. I ask the guy say when be the wedding he say Dayo you no pity me. I still never know when I go finish paying for the 9k ring my fiancee wanted. So wedding is suspended for now. We spoke some days later and he said he has been dating the girl for too long and he feels obliged to marry her. He has several reservations about the girl but he just wanted to do it to avoid "Isolenu"

How do you know the guy is ready?

The requirements for a woman to be ready is not the same as a man.

Several women would marry without a job or just got a little job, But no reasonable man would try that.

Men are more calculative about the marriage thing because they know almost everything falls on them

He would be the one to but diamond ring, The one to pay bride price, one to sponsor the wedding, One to find a house and fend for the family while the lady just go online to look for best colour, best ribbon, Cake design etc

Ko easy lati je omokunrin, afi koluwa ko wa yo

You no see the senseless tackle from Marcelo that led to the penalty or the senseless crosses he was sending in

This is serious

How come all the Madrid players sucked asss yesterday

Casilass, Ramos, Marcelo and Arbeloa

Another desperate lie by the PDP exposed

So one of the few shining light of PDP wants to leave the nest of killers too

So a rehabilitated junkie like Fani Kayode can even make sense like this


I am surprised

What is wrong if he supports Manchester United?

Many Nigerians watch foreign football, movies and Music and have favourite clubs, actors and musicians

I am a Bayern Munich fan and I would do the same on my birthday

Ibime: I've never rated that fella cos he's too one-footed but im surprised his possession game has improved. That's what defensive midfielders should be doing not receiving the ball and running headlong into traffic like a headless chicken. . . . like one useless defensive midfielder at Chelsea called Ramires.

Quite impressed with the whole Brazil team except Hulk. Scolari just needs to add Willian, Diego Costa and Fernandinho to the squad and they are good to go.

I agree with you.

This last season at Bayern really refined his game because he had to compete with Martinez and being just a destroyer would not cut it

The dud wins Golden boot via calculator again

Since he scored 4 goals vs the Fishermen of Tahiti

AjanleKoko: It's so funny that the much-maligned Fernando Torres wins the Golden Boot yet again

Courtesy of 4 goals vs the 11 fishermen of Tahiti

shymexx: Bayern = Martinez + Gotze + Gustavo + Schweinsteiger

Surely you have eyes.

Add Muller, Robben Ribery and possibly Lewandoski

[size=28pt]Spain go home you are drunk[/size]

https://www.dumpaday.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/go-home-youre-drunk-meme.jpg