₦airaland Forum

fabianiyobosa:
Not going to lie, TEMS was flat. Like she was trying to breathe.

The only 2 Naija act that can perform live without struggle is Wizkid and Tuface.

She wasn't the only one; Rema was also finding it hard to catch his breath, and that is because Utah has a very high altitude. The first time I played soccer here I almost passed out, which was weird, given in Nigeria I could play soccer all day without breaking a sweat.

Akexstinger:
Application portal need not contain the specific job position a candidate applied for. In the beginning you were told of only two categories "EH and GT" and those disciplines that should apply for either of the two.
So if you are Mechanical Engr and you applied for EH, during the interview they are gonna ask you things related to mechanical in oil and gas, your claimed years of experience and then some general questions.
That was why everybody wrote the same aptitude test, no distinction.

Really?

Well, we shall eventually see to that.
And I'm quite certain that some persons will be shocked of the outcome. It's a given.

Application portal that doesn't contain the position a specific candidate applied for, is that one a portal?

And it seems no one noticed this unusual difference.

Naijasinglegirl:
Dear Nigerian boyfriends

We hope that you and your ATM card are getting ready for Sunday?
In no particular order, below are a list of items we WOULD NO LONGER accept as Valentine day gifts.

BBM BC’s
Whatsapp BC’s
BBM PM Shoutouts
Instagram Woman Crush Sunday.
Romantic sms except it is accompanied with a credit alert.
Card: Soft and hard copies. This is not applicable to recharge cards. Please note the s.
Leaves/Flowers: Fresh, rubber, dried, scented, unscented, cooked and uncooked.
Perfumes from an unnamed designer: That type that stains cloth and produces rashes.
Cheap jewelries made out of copper, steel, zinc and iron.
Cheap chocolates.
Rice & Chicken in Mr Biggs nylon.

However, while we are still saving for your Bentley, we expect that you’d receive your regular valentine pack of a handkerchief, a singlet and a boxer with sincere appreciation as these three items connotes a deep meaning that has more value than silver and gold.
A white handkerchief signifies gratitude. We are indirectly apologising for all the times we made you sweat and thanking you for sticking with us.
All the wonderful things you could use your handkerchief for
You boys never have more than three singlets. This is why we keep adding another one year after year.
We wouldn’t be giving you briefs/boxers if we haven’t envisage a future with you. We care about your body & the packaging of reproductive organs.
Extras of ties and cufflinks, who doesn’t like a perfect gentleman?

In addition to the above, you are expected to observe the following rules from now till 15th February.
– You are not allowed to take any one week impromptu trip to the village to visit your uncle’s brother husband. No fake business trips! No disappearing acts!
– You are advised not to fake any form of terminal disease or sickness. Be warned.
– No bad phone, bad network, bad battery, phone speaker is bad , power button is not working excuses.
– No ‘ATM is not working or card has been blocked’ excuses. You have from now till Friday to register your BVN.
– You are advised to increase your tolerance level for all our excesses. No ‘we should go on a break’ ‘It’s not you, it’s me’ or ‘I have been thinking about this relationship’ speech will be accepted.
– Third service, fourth service, prayer meeting, youth meeting and fasting MUST NOT be used as an excuse come Sunday the 14th.

Please pass to respective parties. We thank you in advance for understanding.

Signed:
By @Naijasinglegirl,
On behalf of girlfriends in Nigeria.

http://www.naijasinglegirl.com/open-letter-nigerian-boyfriends

In Akpos' voice: E no rhyme joor. Try part 2












So stale; You can do better

Exxon Mobil Graduate Recruitment?

Increase or fall in crude oil price, who cares.

What is here to delight in when the strength of the economy depends strongly on crude, and at the same time a foreign country like Russia defines the strength of our economy?

It is crystal clear that it is high time we diversified the economy.

Truckpusher:
You obviously failed the aptitude test .

What aptitude test? Aptitude test I was never invited for or the one you scheduled for me?

mtcheww

In Jesus' voice: "It is finished". Thank thee Lord.

Any GT in the house that has received a success mail yet?

The wait continues.

Blessedgurl:
congrats bro......oluwa pick up the call.....

Na wa o! Which call Oluwa wan pick again? You buy phone give Oluwa ni?

You better keep working hard.

Congrats, Djake.

Frankaka8:
Are you a young graduate and seeking for a rewarding professional international working experience? Through Totals’ Young Graduate Program AMO, offer you an 18 months opportunity in our subsidiaries, within the Africa / Middle East, to discover one of our three main business lines (commercial , finance, technical).
 

Within the framework of Totals’ diversity policy, the Young Graduate Program aims at improving the representation of the young graduates (Bac+5 having less than a year’s work experience after graduation) of African or the Middle East origin within our subsidiaries in this region.


Title:  Total Young Graduate Program (AMO) (10057567)
Company : Amo
Contract : Fixed-term 6 Month (local)
Business : Marketing & Services
Location : Worldwide – Local
Interviews will take place in : Local
Starting date : As soon as possible
 
Salary: According to profile and experience :
Innovative and attractive, a structured 18months course program
6months +12months in other total subsidiary in Africa or middle east

Required Skills
A bachelors graduate, with technical, business or finance backgrounds
Be fluent in French and / or English
This program is dedicated to graduates with less than one year post graduate experience
Be geographically mobile
Have the right Total attitude attributes, being innovative, easily adaptable to different environments, flexible, open minded and a good team player

How to Apply
Interested and qualified candidates should Click Here to Apply
http://www.jobzilla.ng/2016/01/total-oil-and-gas-fresh-graduate.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=Feed:+recentnigerianjobvacancies+(JobZilla+Nigeria)&m=1

T0T0 oil or Total oil and gas, or whatever you call yourself, "go and die".

Playing with the hearts of young graduates since 2013.

monacobull:
Let me start off by saying at this point i believe Nigerian graduates have a lot of work to do. Its taking a lot of effort for me to contain the level of disappointment im currently feeling towards our university leavers. I work in a multinational company and i have had the chance to partake in the interview process of some roles the company advertised. Most of the time im usually appalled at the errors and goofs i see on CV's. So let me get to the main story.

Six graduates came into the office this morning to interview for an internship position. Which was going to pay a basic salary and also some nice commissions. All the interviewees were very disappointing despite the very easy questions which was for a very simple role. In fact none of them showed enough quality to half consider them for the job.

After the last person left, I and my colleague had already given up and hoped to do a fresh advert for the role. But 1 other person that was present at the interview was a senior staff from our foreign headquarters. And he suddenly suggested that we give the office cleaner a chance. At first i thought he was saying it out of frustration but this guy was damn serious. Long story short, we called the cleaner in and he handled our questions well and even scaled through 80% of the objection statements we threw at him! Whats more is that this guy isn't exactly educated and he even stammers! WTF !!!! Agreed he might have had better answers because he knows some more about the company having worked with us for a while, but still on still!...to outshine 6 graduates!...ah.

Finally finally we have decided to take him on a trial role and give him the required training. Im still shocked beyond belief.

Naija graduates, please get your shit together.

I am astoundingly nonplussed on how you used the words "Nigerian graduates" so loosely when you happen to be one.

I'm afraid you are a big disgrace to the universe.

shedik4real:
Bro, any info?? Boiz body dey hot o. This wait don dey turn sthelse o

It took them 4 months to get back to us after the test. Perhaps, same thing is about to repeat itself. LoL

MEDOLAB:
please, what is the nature of their training

Have you gotten an offer?

sonofthunder:
this your moniker though...

What about the moniker?

Demianski:
True! And information reaching me said there was physical exercise for the technical trainee guys at the head office today. Was it part of the interview or its those that av bin interviewed b4?

Does the information you've got also answers when they (BEDC) will eventually get back to the GT guys?

iavokeo:
15 on d list only 7 came for interview,I tink dey didn't get d message or dey already have an offer elsewhere.questions r d same.

15 on the list, and only 7 showed up? Well, the odds that you are in is pretty high. They may probably take the whole of you.

Did they say when they will likely get back to you guys?

analice107:
OK sir. Am sorry, I step back.

The apology shouldn't be for me, but for the thread.
Thanks for your understanding.

You all have completely derailed the purpose of this thread. So many irrelevant posts.
What has 'laying on of hands' (something some of you have a weak understanding of) and the spiritual orientation of religious writers have to do with the title of the topic?
When this thread first started, it was a delight to read; but now? Some peeps have decided to deliberately derail it.

I plead you guys cease from this disgusting act, or perhaps open another thread for your discussion.

Thanks

iavokeo:
interview

When is your interview, and what position are you interviewing for?

Demianski:
interview or induction?

It can't be induction when they've not given out offer letters.

iavokeo:
baba God has don it oh,bedc has finally called me .....ヽ(*⌒∇⌒*)ﾉ

They've called you for what?

Busbar:
Please for those that will be going for the interview, kindly let us know after ur interview if its for GT or trainee technicain. Thank you.

Surely, it is for GT.

Thanks

wisdomguy4u:
This is a true story of an unforgettable near death experience I had on the night of 24th December, 2015 that changed my life forever.

After 2 days of serious traditional treatment, I regained consciousness. When I was asked to explain how I got bitten by a snake in the church, I didn't know what to say. I can't believe I nearly lost my life because of ....

I'm afraid you shot yourself in the foot. Your story lacks the basic ingredients of truth.

*The night vigil was on the 24th of December, and you claim to be unconscious for an absolute 2 days window; meaning, you should regain consciousness on atleast the eve of December 26 (The 2 days window of unconsciousness). Now my question is, how come you got conscious in the dawn of the 25th of December, posting comments on nairaland? Your comment history is there to implicate you.

It is clear you made up this story to hit the frontpage, and you got what you want. Nice one.

To some it is called LUCK, to another it is called GRACE. Both are not a function of Diligence.

eremy:
SSG(R& D ) Graduate Recruitment @ RECKITT BENCKISER

Requirements:

Are a Graduate of physical or Health Sciences (minimum of 2.1) and you have what it takes to join a performance driven organization like RB?

Method of Application
Send your CV's to chinuru.alex-efeyini@rb.com

ONLY QUALIFIED CANDIDATES WILL BE CONTACTED.

.

bodeoni:
Please don't limit yourself to just jobs in core science. There are very few opportunities for those without work experience. I would advice that you look beyond the core sciences and into the management sciences. I am not asking you to abandon your field. You have nothing to loose cos eventually when you do get a job in core science, you would have the advantage of being multidisciplinary. Cheers

.

eremy:
Great news. Success on your forthcoming interview.

.