₦airaland Forum

hey i posted this joke here, did you search before posting or are you the girl's boyfriend?

TO BE HONEST, THAT THING DOESN'T LOOK STRESSED OUT, IT LOOKS STRESSED IN. HAHAHAHAHA

O4real:
@afroboy alias afrodonkey
Or r u still drinking urine?

damn! u got me falling with that one. hahahaha

what? i will put the hand back and tell him to leave my privates.

that is funny.

this is the most interesting murder case i have ever heard. nice one.

i always wanted to play golf. now i think i will really play golf, the benefits are too much.

for the last one, before you do it, make up your mind that you wont get night action for one week or more. if you fit hold body then go ahead.

@ tamia

Ross and Pheobe are also funny but Joey is my best. he crackes me up all the time. i also love everybody loves raymond. his grandpa is very funny. same goes to Robert.

do me i do you, nobody go vex.

Test for Smart People
Below are four (4) questions and a bonus question. You have to answer them instantly. You can't take your time, answer all of them immediately. OK?


Let's find out just how clever you really are, 



Ready? GO!!! (scroll down)

















First Question:

You are participating in a race. You overtake the second person. What position are you in?






















~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~




Answer: If you answered that you are first, then you are
absolutely wrong! If you overtake the second person and you take his place, you are second!

Try not to screw up next time.
Now answer the second question,
but don't take as much time as you too! k for the first question, OK?





Second Question:
If you overtake the last person, then you are, ?
(scroll down)



























~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~







Answer: If you answered that you are second to last, then you are wrong again. Tell me, how can you overtake the LAST Person?


You're not very good at this, are you?





Third Question:
Very tricky arithmetic! Note: This must be done in your head only.
Do NOT use paper and pencil or a calculator. Try it.



Take 1000 and add 40 to it. Now add another 1000 . Now add 30.
Add another 1000. Now add 20. Now add another 1000
Now add 10. What is the total?


Scroll down for answer, 




















































~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Did you get 5000?

The correct answer is actually 4100.



If you don't be! lieve it, check it with a calculator!
Today is definitely not your day, is it?
Maybe you'll get the last question right, 
, Maybe.



Fourth Question:

Mary's father has five daugh! ters: 1. Nana, 2. Nene, 3. Nini,
4. Nono. What is the name of the fifth daughter?















































~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Did you Answer Nunu?
NO! Of course it isn't.
Her name is Mary. Read the question again!



Okay, now the bonus round:

A mute person goes into a shop and wants to buy a toothbrush. By
imitating the action of brushing his teeth he successfully
expresses himself to the shopkeeper and! the purchase is
done.
Next, a blind man comes into the shop who wants to buy a pair of
sunglasses; how does HE indicate what he wants?



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



He just has to open his mouth and ask, 
It's really very simple,  Like you!











PASS TH IS ON TO FRUSTRATE THE
SMART PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE!

What four animals does a woman like to have in her house? A tiger in bed, a mink in her closet, a jaguar in her garage and a jackass to pay for it all.

Girl: Do you believe in puppy love?
Boy: I tried it once, but their assholes are too small.

Husband says; "When I'm gone you'll never find another man like me".
Wife replied; "What makes you think I'd want another man like you!"

When I was young I used to pray for a bike, then I realized that God doesn't work that way, so I stole a bike and prayed for forgiveness.

Innkeeper: The room is $15. a night. It's $5. if you make your own bed.
Guest: I'll make my own bed.
Innkeeper: Good. I'll get you some nails and wood.

In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.

Love thy neighbor all through the day, but first make sure her husband's away!

Wife: Give me some money. I want to buy a bra.
Husband: Why? You have nothing to put in it!
Wife: You wear shorts!

A Fulani man had a quarell with an Ibo man and was slapped by the Ibo man.

He collected his stick (shepherd stick) to take vengeance, but was advised against it and encouraged to take the matter to court where he will be paid some money (compensation).

The Fulani man promptly registered his case at a local court and during the court proceeding the judge adviced him to go for an out of court settlement.

The Fulani man politely enquired about who was to pay him the money?

The judge sensed he meant compensation, ruled on the case and awarded ten naira as compensation. He now told him to come the next day (Tuesday) to receive his money. The whole idea was to frustrate the Fulani man into forgetting about the money.

He came on Tuesday as instructed and was told to come back on Wednesday. On Wednesday - come on Thursday. On Thursday, - come on Friday.

Friday came (he now expected to be told to come back next week). When the judge now said come next week Tuesday, he approached the judge as if to tell him something and slapped him in the face saying, "if the other man bring the ten naira collect am!"

never conclude without reaching the end. nice joke.

he copied very well. serves him right.

i hope the dude has written his will because he is so dead.

i will also like to know.

she wants something that will go from 0 to 200 in seconds, come on now, bathroom scale does more than that in a micro second. hahaha

[quote author=hot-angel link=topic=11323.msg312636#msg312636 date=1145936291]wowo + wowo= Atutupoyoyo.[/quote]guess you have seen that baby dancing. she is so hillarious.

his gonna give the king head. that king must be gay.

you totally got me. bravo

what the hell? where on earth did they get that kid?

eze nji aga ogu (the king i fight alongside with)

my best friend

daddy

my all and all

omakasiri (the finest)

most high

oku na elele  (the burning fire)

anu ana agba egbe ona ata nri ( the animal that is being shot and he is eating)

onolo ihe nolo ihe nolo enyi  (what that swallowed what swallowed an elephant)

oseburuuwa (king of earth)

king of kings
Lord of Lords
Ominipotent, Ominiscience, Ominipresent GOd
God of Abraham Isaac and Jacob
God that answers by fire

in my case, i think you should cut it down to after 4 years. lol

all of you that are making jokes with Igbo people, kiss my ass.

tamia:
yo momma's so fat when she passed infront of the TV i missed a whole season of friends.

hey girl, u killed me with that one. that was so funny. i tot i was actually the only one that love friends.

nice one. why didnt he throw them away? i would have been drinking wine by now.

i have seen this joke before. still crackes me up. granny didnt explain it well.

@ 04real

you got me all cracked up man. damn. nice joke.

@ africanboy

boy did you drink urine before reading this joke abi you just wanted to cause problem.

@04real

thanks man.