₦airaland Forum

jeromestarks:
Word of encouragement?
Oh! You want me to tell her Well done?
Or I should lie to her that she did a good thing and it doesn't matter?
I simply told her the truth. It is wrong to "encourage" evil deeds.

this matter strong �...

Brendababy:
YOU'RE A PATHETIC IDIOT TO ARGUE WITH STRANGERS! FØØØØL. EWU GAMBIA

haha, you must be an ibo gurl...

LadyD22:
I am not in her shoes but i have succeeded in cutting off my ties with toxic relatives and friends , I was also a teen so I know things like that could happen but as an adult you become 100% responsible

The thing I would do is to open up to someone I trust preferably my age group , they will understand better , there are some things you know but you need to hear someone else say it to understand what it really sounds like

Self love is the key and it is a luxury, when you love you , noone can bullshit you , not even YOU ,
I am a living witness and I respect me , more than anyone can respect me , and noone can make me do what I don't want to or feel what I don't want to feel

So I cannot imagine myself in her shoes

Your point is very clear and understood.... For me, going for rehab and counseling would be a good step. I don't trust opening up to anyone about such sensitive issues.. People's mouth leak...that's my opinion.

How old are you now?

jeromestarks:
You don cast!
That guilt you feel is a sign that you documents are with the gate keeper of hell; nothing for you on heaven.

For the record, he will bleep you again and again. You will get pregnant and you foolish boyfriend will be held responsible. This is how he will train children who aren't his just like most Nigeria husbands are doing today.

these things happen in real life but please just have some sympathy for the poor lady... A word of advice and encouragement isn't too difficult..

deekseen:
This information is not for your boyfriend. You didn't sin against him but against God.

Asking God for forgiveness is the best start to healing from this. Things like this are abominations and they trigger generational curses. You have already set a faulty foundation (Psalms 11:3).

You can attend any Dominion City Church and go for Encounter Retreat. There's a deliverance session that deals with situations like this.

very good advice...

LadyD22:
Funny thing is two of my cousins have made advances towards me when we we were younger, it's very common and I had elder cousins who experimented with themselves and would tell me about it but I never got a chance to sleep over at their houses so I could only hear about it , but I can't say that I would've not made the same mistake that they made if I was given the chance , children are very curious

But if you're still doing it as an adult , then that is you , you're responsible for yourself now and I'm sure you don't want to get pregnant for a married man , a married cousin , it isn't worth it

It would be easier if you loved yourself but you don't , if you did I'm sure you would have cut ties a long time ago , he's a toxic person and it's dangerous continuing to have anything to do with him
It's not about incest , or sin or married man , it's just boundaries , when you know that something is bad for you and you continue to do it , it slowly kills your self respect and you'll just be carrying on so much emotional baggage and have to live with it
If you have a trusted friend , speak to them about it , I have a few friends that can hear I killed someone and still not react " she probably did it out of self defense"
Me: "No I really wanted to just kill him"
Friend :"Well he was going to die sooner or later "
My most valuable friend opened up about something similar but she was a child and it could've been anyone and now she has phobia for sex because of the experience and she still sees that cousin , acts like it never happened

Don't be leaving your children with just anyone , some people need to have their reproductive organs confiscated because if we start to talk about family members , especially uncles , lemme not talk

it's okay,it is what it is..your advice is good but... Saying too many things @ a time... You're a lady,if you're in her shoes.how can you cope with this?

frankyfranky:
Oga, if u love ur wife, just find away to travel with her... No union is perfect either but she might be feeling lonely n ur so called friend took advantage of that ..
Avoid ur Frd, he is not a Frd.
Even if they have not done something, they do it soon.

you have a point.. Women are very vulnerable.. That's why I have issues trusting women... Honestly...

Osama2478:
Nairalanders,

Please I need you to help me have a third eye into a personal matter. Although, I have taken a position, I just wanted to be sure I never overreacted.

I am a guy based in Europe and my wife is in Nigeria. I have only been away for a year.

There was a day I was calling my wife on phone and her other phone was ringing which I asked her to pick up but she never did only to say that it was my friend calling her. I was surprised and asked her immediately how did my friend get know her other number. She gave some not-so-convincing explanation but I let it slide.

Curiously, when I returned to Nigeria, I discovered that this friend sent money to her and she never told me about it. The so called friend also didn't tell me anything. In fact, he has always acted as if he wasn't having any contact with my wife.

When I saw the transaction, my wife wanted to manipulate the situation to make it look like I was invading her privacy. I stood my ground to know what purpose the money was meant for but no reasonable explanation.

I called the friend too to know what the money was meant for but only retorted if he couldn't give my wife money as a friend. He couldn't offer any reasonable explanation. With high sense of modesty, this is a guy that would wish to be in my position economic wise and I have always been very generous to my wife when it comes to money. Therefore, financial lack could not be an excuse.

After this experience, I severe my friendship with the guy and rein in on my wife too. I felt that was not the kind of friendship any reasonable person should keep because I felt betrayed by his actions and inactions in relating with my wife behind me. I also see both of them (friend and wife) to be dangerous to my well-being.

Please I will like to know if I overreacted.

Thank you.

MOD please take it to front page for wider views and opinions

You're indeed a good man. You didn't overreact... That your friend is a beast... Cut all ties with him asap.. He's a snitch... No friend will try to be closer to another man's wife behind his back, he's a betrayal and can murder you just to be with your wife... End that friendship now ... Sit your wife down, make her completely delete all contacts with your snake friend.. Give her options, its either she chooses you or she's free to move on... If she agrees to stay, she must cut all ties with him, probably change her contact number... Then watch her..if she crosses that boundaries, let her go...

KingKO22:
Zombidients and Obituarists running from pillars to post like a desperadooo

Jumping from one political party to others


A man of zero integrity

Beside OBI is IBO agenda which will fail before arrival of elextio

i disagree

Let's see pictures, seeing is believing..

Don't force sex on a man, if the man is worrying you for it too much, you ladies will still complain...it's not every time, man is sexually aroused, he needs time to balance, rest, being in a happy mood helps too... Stop pressuring him...

When you don't have direction in life... Serves her right... I won't make this waste of space popular, my mind is fixed on Obi/Datti 2023...

Hands shaking tinubu supporters again... When Obi-dient speaks, agbadorian followers should shut up...

This lady isn't the woman for you bro.. Accept it and live longer to testify..it is very clear she's gone deep in the game... God loves you and has shown you all need to know about this dellilah.come to think of it, how can a young lady be comfortably sleeping with a married man with five kids, sending her privates to a stranger and still strongly denying it.. You better run for your life oo.. They no dey teach this 1 for school.. This is reality.. There are better well behaved,God fearing ladies out there you haven't discovered, narrow your search, you will surely find that special 1...Let God lead you...

Persephone1:
Rule 1: Never personalize a public hole or pole

Rule2: Never be serious with anyone at his or her whoring stage

Rule 3: Forgive a cheat at your peril!

nice piece

SAMBARRY:
I will see good news all my life in Jesus name amen

same here in Jesus name. Amen.

DukeNija:
Did you read the part where the wife is unrepentant and going spiritual to silence him? Amos 3:3 - Can two work together except they agree? How can this marriage work?
We need to be practical when dishing suggestions and back them up with scripture.
One man alone cannot be in a marriage, he’s wasting his time or worse, digging his grace.

well, you have a point right there... Some women can be very terrible, you are very correct sir.this case strong... Let the man cut her loose because this kind of woman may end up sending him to an early grave... Honestly... After God i fear this women....their ways no be here...

False teachings...

DukeNija:
Take back his marriage how? Please explain how he could take back his marriage when his wife is sleeping with other men? We learn everyday.

Let him handle this issues to God, I'm sure God will fight for him... This fight can only be won, if God is involved... Humanly speaking, he can't take this marriage back without God's intervention... I would suggest separation but children are involved... If they separate, those kids will suffer... For the sake of the kids, let him try to make it work... This isn't easy... God can still heal this marriage no matter how broken...

pinkPUSSY:
I don't want him to be disqualified, I want him to be on a ballot paper so that urchings won't have an excuse to give like saying he would have won if he was allowed to contest that he's a jagaban..


I want him to face the last and final political defeat in his life come Feb 2023., after that nobody will advice to go and stay with his grandchildren and great grandchildren ...

thanks..

Clearly you brought this mess upon yourself, why didn't you set boundaries for her when you started this relationship.. You let her do whatever she wants... A married woman in her right senses is supposed to cut male friends out entirely regardless... Allowing males friends around her will make her vulnerable... A woman isn't called the weaker vessel for nothing... When you are away,she will be tempted, now it's difficult to reverse this because she's already gone deep into this... No wonder, her friend is avoiding her.. Be the man and take back your marriage by force...harder times indeed contributes to this mess... Your wife is just too loosed, man... May God help you...

jeromestarks:
You should have married a virgin.
Divorce her and "find" a virgin.

now i see the gains in marrying a virgin...

Wetin this hooka gain? Nothing.. Going back to square 1...maybe this 1 would end up in nollywood..

Who will send such a vulnerable kid that's mentally unstable,that person does not really care about the poor girl.. The devil is really @work this times.. God please save us... The man is mentally unstable and should rot in jail..

ASAPFERG1:
Igbos again

na dem dem...

Cadamlk:
I love Nigerian mum. They don't take shit from kids . I am not talking about young mums of today,many of them spoil kids by trying to copy the western life.

Reminds me of my mum ,a very strong disciplinarian.

much love to real moms out there...

H0didon:
I talk am . As soon as i saw in the news that she did ass surgery, i knew instantly that it was for men's attention. Women ehh . They love attention diee.... Its like a daily medication for them.
Even God sef go don tire. They are never contented. God created them,gave them eye bra, they shaved it and replace it using pencil to draw their own. He gave them eye lashes, they use scissors and cut it so that they can fix artificial one. He gave them boobs, ass yet they meet doctors to redo it . All for what? Men's attention. They are never satisfied.

Well, its Simps i usually pity the most. They always try to please them not knowing that that gender can never be satisfied.




As our Ancestors would say "'Attention' and 'cloutchasing' is another hidden cure to a woman's mentall illness and irrational behaviour".

you have said it all... They are insatiable creatures indeed...

PussyOdour:
Atiku and Tinubu are the same just that Atiku is more strong and smart than the ugly frog eyes agbadorian BATstard.

Both Atiku and agbadorian will never smell our Aso rock. Buhari is the last calamity. Enough is enough.

i totally agree �... I like the line ugly frog eyes agbadorian BATstard... Aka Hands shaking Tinubu

Prostitution doesn't pay... Just a waste of time and your strengths... Buharist government really brought pains to Nigerians.. We never saw this coming...