Jokes Etc › Re: D Otunba And Angel by EFCC1(op): 3:11pm On Mar 17, 2012 |
Three rats were arguing in Don Henry's house about who get swag pass and the 1st rat said: "I chop rat food wit poison I no die."2nd rat: "I dance awilo on top trap for rat, nothing do me."The 3rd rat:"just laugh, u both nah mumu "u see dat cat over there, nah me give am belle". |
Jokes Etc › D Otunba And Angel by EFCC1(op): 3:08pm On Mar 17, 2012 |
OTUNBA FRED and his wife ONYINYE UMEH were sleeping. OTUNBA started dreaming of heaven. Here is what happened there with the angel: OTUNBA and angel were going as dey reached the first gate of heaven, OTUNBA told the angel he wants to urinate, the angel said,we don't allow dat here but i permit you. As they were abt getting to the second gate, OTUNBA told the angel again he wants to polute, the angel looked at him and said, we don't allow it here but i permit you, as dey were about geting to the third gate, OTUNBA told the angel again that he wants to defecate (shit), the angel permitted him again. After OTUNBA finished shitting, he saw a rose flower by The gate, as he took the flower to clean his buttocks, a heavy slap landed on his face on bed. it was his ONYINYE. ONYINYE UMEH said;you piss for bed i no talk, you mess for bed i no talk, you shit for bed again i no talk, you won cum use my wrapper clean yansh you be mad man?.... |
Nairaland General › Re: "Nairaland 2.0" Is Live! Any Questions Or Feedback? by EFCC1(m): 7:04pm On Mar 11, 2012 |
[size=16pt]bull-shit[/size] |
European Football (EPL, UEFA, La Liga) › Re: Chelsea Sack Villas-Boas by EFCC1(m): 3:22pm On Mar 04, 2012 |
In as much as i dont like poor result. . . .I hate to see him go |
Travel › Nigerian Passengers Denied Entry Into South Africa by EFCC1(op): 11:52am On Mar 03, 2012 |
Many Nigerians aboard Arik Air and South Africa Airways flights were refused entry to South Africa on Friday.
The Southern Africa correspondent of NAN reports that the passengers were denied entry by the South Africa Port Health authority and the immigration service on the ground that they had invalid yellow fever vaccination cards.
One of the passengers, Olaminde Olaofe, told NAN that they obtained their cards from government authorised health agencies in Nigeria and added: ``This is very embarrassing and dehumanising. ``It is an embarrassment not to us as passengers alone but to the Federal Government of Nigeria that another country will say the document we, as Nigerians, obtained in our country is fake. ``We had arrived here about 5.30 a.m. and until now we are still kept at the airport by the immigration officer under the claim that our yellow fever cards are not recognised. ``Some of us are not first time travellers to South Africa and we had used the same yellow card before to enter the country. ``I obtained my card from Eti-Osa Local Government along with my brother. While I am allowed entry, my brother is held by the immigration people.’’
Olaofe said 33 school children on execution were also affected. Arik Airline Zonal Manager in South Africa, Kinsley Uzor, said 28 of the airline’s passengers were returned to Nigeria on Thursday. ``It is an unfortunate incident, 28 of our passengers who came on Thursday were returned back to Nigeria today by the immigration and the Port Health authorities.’’
He added: ``50 of our passenger in today’s flight are still at the airport right now, we are still trying to sort out the problem. ``The South Africa Immigration and Port Health are saying that they don’t recognise the yellow cards and that signature on the cards are irregular. ``We are not the issuing authority for yellow cards, our responsibility is to carry our passengers once they are cleared by the Nigeria port authorities. ``Before now, even if a passenger does not possess yellow card, at the airport he or she will be given vaccination, with payment of 50 dollars. ``But the new South Africa law says there should not be entry into the country without the vaccination card. ``Their argument is that the law stipulates that intending travellers must get vaccination 10 days before they travel.’’ Uzor said the Nigerian High Commission and the Consulate were already intervening in the matter. A Nigeria consulate staff, who spoke with NAN under condition of anonymity, confirmed that Nigerian authorities were aware of the matter. ``We are aware of the incident and we are working with the High Commission to resolve the matter,’’ the official said.
Meanwhile, Arik Air issued a statement on Friday temporarily suspending all flight operations between Nigeria and South Africa with immediate effect. A statement signed by Isla Moffett, Sales and Marketing Manager of the company, stated that the decision to suspend the daily B737-800 service between the two countries was taken due to the ongoing dispute with South African Port Health authorities on yellow fever documentation. ``Many of our Nigerian passengers have been detained and refused entry into the country in the recent month. ``The Port Health authorities cite as being incorrect or unrecognised batch number on the documentation which is mandatory proof before entrance to the country.’’
The statement said the situation had escalated ``culminating in over a hundred Nigerians and West Africa passengers travelling from the region being refused entry ,including 50 Arik passengers today. ``Arik have reached the conclusion that the irregular and obfuscating nature of this protocol is having an impact on its passengers and does not wish to proceed with operation into a country where its customers are at risk of detainment or any other measure meted out arbitrarily by the authorities.’’ In the statement, the Chairman of Arik, Michael Arumemi-Ikhide, said the airline would not stand-by and watch its passengers reach their destination after overnight flight only to be met with a protocol and procedure that was at best haphazard and at worst discriminatory to many passengers. http://www.businessdayonline.com/NG/index.php/news/latest/33876-nigerian-passengers-denied-entry-into-south-africa |
Family › Re: What Dettol Advert Did To My Nephew by EFCC1(m): 5:23pm On Mar 01, 2012 |
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Education › Re: Please, Jambutme Exam Date Is When. by EFCC1(m): 7:07pm On Feb 29, 2012 |
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Education › Re: Please, Jambutme Exam Date Is When. by EFCC1(m): 7:06pm On Feb 29, 2012 |
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Education › Re: Please, Jambutme Exam Date Is When. by EFCC1(m): 6:46pm On Feb 29, 2012 |
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Politics › Re: Police Defuse Bomb Planted In Suleja Market by EFCC1(m): 6:07pm On Feb 29, 2012 |
kola oloye: ^ So you believed? Until I see the video of how it was carried out i will not blf Nigeria Police. Arosa: Me too! Thomas n Thomases |
Romance › Re: Old Man: Romantic? by EFCC1(m): 6:04pm On Feb 29, 2012 |
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Romance › Re: A Poem For Her! by EFCC1(m): 5:45pm On Feb 29, 2012 |
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Romance › Re: What Is The Best Compliment You Ever Recieved? by EFCC1(m): 5:25pm On Feb 29, 2012 |
handsome charming prince |
Nairaland General › Re: Lagosians Feel They Can Outsmart Everyone by EFCC1(m): 4:18pm On Feb 28, 2012 |
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European Football (EPL, UEFA, La Liga) › Re: UCL: Napoli Vs Chelsea (3 - 1) On 21st February 2012 by EFCC1(m): 11:45am On Feb 21, 2012 |
Blues is ma colour |
Politics › Re: The True Cost Of #occupynigeria by EFCC1(m): 11:14am On Feb 21, 2012 |
useless topic why must feeding and other expenses (fueling,newspaper)be on the national budget? were they not being paid salary? |
European Football (EPL, UEFA, La Liga) › Re: Should Wenger Be Sacked? by EFCC1(m): 4:55pm On Feb 20, 2012 |
Arsene Wenger believes a top-four finish would be like winning a trophy this season after Arsenal's mid-season revival suffered two serious setbacks this week.  |
Webmasters › Re: Nigerians Became The Top Internet Users In Africa by EFCC1(op): 10:57am On Feb 20, 2012 |
lonamy: No wonder why stuents are failing WAEC/GCE. They will tell their parent they want to go and register WAEC online and will never read for the exams. They will continue to YAB GEJ on Face Book. LOL   |
Travel › Re: Does Travelling Within Nigeria By Air Require Any Document by EFCC1(op): 10:41am On Feb 20, 2012 |
really interesting. . .I applied for national id two years ago (2010). up till date it still not ready |
Travel › Re: Does Travelling Within Nigeria By Air Require Any Document by EFCC1(op): 6:45pm On Feb 18, 2012 |
steve_101: valid ID thanks for your reply. . . just any id? (student,,,temporary work id) |
Travel › Does Travelling Within Nigeria By Air Require Any Document by EFCC1(op): 4:16pm On Feb 18, 2012 |
Please let me know |
Education › Re: I Got Admission But by EFCC1(op): 1:16pm On Feb 18, 2012 |
deolub: My friend, You can go due to the fact that life itself is a risk, But have this in mind, make sure you are always inside the school premises and face what you are doing squarely, and Most importantly you can always pray about it thanks broh Emzybrown: Buy a short gun,remember the police and military cant help u,better protect your self frm this moronic sect u are not serious o  actually we will not be resuming until September . . . .thanks @all |
Webmasters › Nigerians Became The Top Internet Users In Africa by EFCC1(op): 7:02pm On Feb 17, 2012 |
Nigerians became the top internet users in Africa as their number reached 45 million, according to the Internet World Stats web site.
The latest updates were made in December, 2011, and statistics suggested that Egypt comes second at 21.7 million internet users, followed by Morocco which recorded 15.7 million. According to the global web site, African internet users represent nearly six per cent of world users, who amount to 140 million. source for Thomas n Thomases http://english.ahram.org.eg/NewsContent/3/12/34774/Business/Economy/Nigerians-are-the-top-internet-users-in-Africa,-Eg.aspx |
Education › Re: I Got Admission But by EFCC1(op): 5:09pm On Feb 01, 2012 |
u people should please reply na  anyone schooling in d north should tell me d situation over there. . .tanx |
Romance › Man Call Police To Complain About Prostitute's Bad Service Rendered To Him by EFCC1(op): 4:54pm On Feb 01, 2012 |
saw this funny news somewhere and decided to share Jerry Eugene Streng- Jailed After Calling Police To Complain About Prostitute's Bad Service
Berlin, Pennsylvania - Jerry Eugene Streng, a 63-year-old Berlin man was jailed after he allegedly called 911 to complain after two hookers charged him for sex, but failed to include him in the act.
According to Pennsylvania state police, Streng hired two Berlin area hookers, Jacqueline Eubanks, 50, and Tonia Good, 34, for $400 under the agreement that he would be in the middle of the women as they all engaged in sexual activities at his residence.
The women got undressed, and began smoking Streng's marijuana, but when it came to sex, they seemed to be more interested in pleasing each other rather than Streng.
Investigators say Streng took off his clothes and got into bed with the women. However, instead of being in the middle of the women, he was relegated to a corner of the bed as the two women had sex with one another. 
When the women were finished, they reportedly took Streng's money without giving him the 'full service' he had paid for.
Streng called 911 to report what he referred to as a robbery. When officers arrived on the scene, they arrested Streng. Eubanks and Good were also apprehended.
A few hours later, Steng called 911 a second time when one of the prostitutes returned to his home to use the restroom. She and Streng were taken into custody.
Streng was booked into jail and charged with patronization of prostitution . Eubanks and Good were also booked into jail on prostitution charges.
Web Page: http://www.theweeklyvice.com/2011/12/jerry-eugene-streng-jailed-after.html |
Education › I Got Admission But by EFCC1(op): 7:33pm On Jan 31, 2012 |
i just checked jamb admission status and i was given admission to study engineering in Plateau State polytechnic but due to crisis in the-North, (Jos in particular) dunno what to do. . .though i had bought another jamb form but i don't know if i should take up the admission pls advice me cos i don't wanna remain at home.
[size=14pt]Mod.front page please[/size] |
Politics › Re: Nemesis! Blast Kills One, Injures Two In A Bomb Factory In Damaturu. by EFCC1(m): 5:49pm On Dec 20, 2011 |
it shall continue to be like dat IJN |
Family › Re: Help! He Can't Beat His Wife Anymore (She Learnt Karate) by EFCC1(m): 5:37pm On Dec 20, 2011 |
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Family › Re: Help! He Can't Beat His Wife Anymore (She Learnt Karate) by EFCC1(m): 5:30pm On Dec 20, 2011 |
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Romance › Re: I Need A Serious Advice Pls. by EFCC1(m): 7:28pm On Dec 03, 2011 |
D subscriber u are dialing is having s3x with d other guy. . pls try again later  no mind me o mayb u no get skills or doings |
Politics › Re: The Dumbest/not So Smart Statements Of Our Leaders by EFCC1(m): 7:34pm On Nov 16, 2011 |
Funny thread |