₦airaland Forum

Standing on the sidelines during a football game at my son's high school, I saw one of the players take a hard hit. He tumbled to the ground and didn't move. We grabbed our first-aid gear and rushed out onto the field.
The coach picked up the young man's hand and urged, "Son, can you hear me? Squeeze once for yes and twice for no."

Mary was having a tough day and had stretched herself out on the couch to do a bit of what she thought to be well-deserved complaining and self- pitying.

She moaned to her mom and brother, "Nobody loves me, the whole world hates me!"

Her brother, busily occupied playing a game, hardly looked up at her and passed on this encouraging word: "That's not true, Mary. Some people don't even know you."

--------------------

The crusty old managing partner finally passed away, but his firm kept receiving calls asking to speak with him. "I'm sorry, he's dead," was the standard answer. Finally, the receptionist who fielded the calls began to realize it was always the same voice, so she asked who it was and why he kept calling.

The reply: "I used to be one of his junior associates, and I just like to hear you say it."

There was a pilot flying a small single engine charter plane, with a couple of very important executives on board. He was coming into Seattle airport through thick fog with less than 10m visibility when his instruments went out. So he began circling around looking for landmark. After an hour or so, he starts running pretty low on fuel and the passengers are getting very nervous. Finally, a small opening in the fog appears and he sees a tall building with one guy working alone on the fifth floor. The pilot banks the plane around, holds a sign up to the window that says, "Where am I?" In response, the office worker holds up a sign saying, "You're in a plane." The pilot does a 275 degree turn and proceeds to execute a perfect blind landing on the runway of the airport 5 miles away. Just as the plane stops, so does the engine as the fuel has run out.

The passengers are amazed and one asks how he did it. "Simple" replies the pilot, "I asked the guy in that building a simple question. The answer he gave me was 100 percent correct, but absolutely useless, therefore that must be Microsoft's support office and I knew where the airport was from there."

Johnny, a very bright 5 year old, told his daddy he'd like to have a baby brother and, along with his request, offered to do whatever he could to help. His dad, a very bright 35 year old, paused for a moment and then replied, "I'll tell you what, Johnny, if you pray every day for two months for a baby brother, I guarantee that God will give you one!"

Johnny responded eagerly to his dad's challenge and went to his bedroom early that night to start praying for a baby brother.

He prayed every night for a whole month, but after that time, he began to get skeptical. He checked around the neighborhood and found out that what he thought was going to happen, had never occurred in the history of the neighborhood. You just don't pray for two months and then, whammo- a new baby brother. So, Johnny quit praying. After another month, Johnny's mother went to the hospital. When she came back home, Johnny's parents called him into the bedroom. He cautiously walked into the room, not expecting to find anything, and there was a little bundle lying right next to his mother. His dad pulled back the blanket and there was -- not one baby brother, but two!! His mother had twins!

Johnny's dad looked down at him and said, "Now aren't you glad you prayed?"

Johnny hesitated a little and then looked up at his dad and said, "Yes, but aren't you glad I quit when I did?"

Dyt:
I dont get dis

Try again Dyt.
If you still don't get it, pass - it wasn't mean't for you.
For me to explain takes away the punchline. Cheers

John was in trouble, really big trouble. You see, he forgot his wedding anniversary and, if you're married, you can imagine what he's probably going through. His wife was really pissed.

She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE!" She was serious too, so John got serious.

The next morning he woke up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped, right there in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife threw her robe on and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house and opened in with much anticipation.

Inside she found a brand new bathroom scale. John has been missing since Thursday.

It got crowded in heaven so, for one day and one day only, it was decided to only accept people who had really bad day on the day they died.

St. Peter was standing at the pearly gates and said to the first man, "Tell me about the day you died." The man said, "Oh, it was awful. I was sure my wife was having an affair, so I came home early to catch her with him. I searched all over the apartment but couldn't find him anywhere. So I went out onto the balcony, we live on the 25th floor, and found this man hanging over the edge by his fingertips. I went inside, got a hammer, and started hitting his hands. He fell, but landed in some bushes. So, I got the refrigerator and pushed it over the balcony and it crushed him. The strain of the act gave me a heart attack, which caused my death."

St. Peter couldn't deny that this was a pretty bad day, and since it was a crime of passion, he let the man in. He then asked the next man in line about the day he died. "Well, sir, it was awful," said the second man. "I was doing aerobics on the balcony of my 26th floor apartment when I twisted my ankle and slipped over the edge. I managed to grab the balcony of the apartment below, but some maniac came out and started pounding on my fingers with a hammer. Luckily I landed in some bushes. But, then the guy dropped a refrigerator on me!"

St. Peter chuckled, let him into heaven and decided he could really start to enjoy this job. "Tell me about the day you died?” he said to the third man in line. "OK, picture this; I'm naked, hiding inside a refrigerator, "

My husband is wonderful with our baby daughter, but he often turns to me for advice. Recently, I was in the shower when he poked his head in to ask, "What should I feed Lily for lunch?"
"That's up to you," I replied. "There's all kinds of food. Why don't you pretend I'm not home?"
A few minutes later, my cell phone rang. I hopped out of the shower to answer it and heard my husband saying, "Yeah, hi, honey. Uh, what should I feed Lily for lunch?"

After living in the remote wilderness of Kentucky all his life, an old hillbilly decided it was time to visit the big city. In one of the stores, he picks up a mirror and looks in it. Not ever having seen one before, he remarked at the image staring back at him, "How about that?! Here's a picture of my daddy."
He bought the mirror thinking it was a picture of his daddy, but on the way home, he remembered his wife didn't like his father. So, he hung it in the barn and every morning before leaving for the fields, he would go there and look at it.
His wife began to get suspicious of these many trips to the barn. One day after her husband left, she searched the barn and found the mirror. As she looked into the glass, she fumed, "So, that's the ugly woman he's runnin' around with."

A small boy is sent to bed by his mother.
[Five minutes later]
"Mom."
"What"?
"I'm thirsty. Can you bring me a glass of water"?
"No. You had your chance. Lights out."
[Five minutes later]
"Mom."
"What"?
"I'm thirsty. Can I please have a glass of water"?
"I told you no! If you ask again, I'll have to spank you!"
[Five minutes later]
"Mommm."
"WHAT"?!
"When you come in to spank me, can you bring me a glass of water"?

If you don't get the joke kpokpoti(?), no need to stress. Just move on.

I'm really hoping Element will not come in here and start another 'romantic' overtures

On the outskirts of a small town, there was a big, old pecan tree just inside the cemetery fence.
One day, two boys filled up a bucketful of nuts and sat down by the tree, out of sight and began dividing the nuts.
"One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me," said one boy. Several dropped and rolled down toward the fence.
Another boy came riding along the road on his bicycle. As he passed, he thought he heard voices from inside the cemetery. He slowed down to investigate. Sure enough, he heard, "One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me."
He just knew what it was. He jumped back on his bike and rode off.
Just around the bend, he met an old man with a cane, hobbling along.
"Come here quick," said the boy. "You won't believe what I heard! Satan and the Lord are down at the cemetery dividing up the souls."
The man said, "Beat it kid. Can't you see it's hard for me to walk"?
When the boy insisted though, the man hobbled slowly to the cemetery.
Standing by the fence, they heard, "One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me."
The old man whispered, "Boy, you've been tellin' me the truth. Let's see if we can see the Lord."
Shaking with fear, they peered through the fence, but were still unable to see anything. The old man and the boy gripped the wrought iron bars of the fence tighter and tighter as they tried to get a glimpse of the Lord.
At last, they heard, "One for you, one for me. That's all. Now, let's go get those nuts by the fence and we'll be done."
They say the old man made it back to town a full five minutes ahead of the kid on the bike!

Written by Abiodun Awolaja Monday, 23 May 2011

Yinka Odumakin, the spokesman of General Muhammadu Buhari, the ex-soldier who ran for president on the platform of the Congress for Progressive Change (CPC), has been very busy since the conclusion of the April election. When he is not castigating the CAN president, he is busy denigrating Dr Jonathan. However, one is not interested in Odumakin because he is, really, like some human rights activists, parasites who should have been jailed in saner climes, a nobody. He is like Femi Falana, the alleged successor of forthright Gani who has, (like ASUU members, the castrated columnists of the Lagos newspapers, etc) found it convenient to keep quiet when revelations of Ayo Salami’s heinous crimes started emanating from the NJC probe panel. Those who feel no sense of shame should probably not be called upon to search their conscience.

Buhari, the political almajiri who asked his supporters to kill whoever rigged their votes, is enjoying a quiet time in Daura, but parents of the slain NYSC members are having the most sorrowful moment of their lifetime. Despite the magnitude of the tragedy instigated by Buhari and members of his party, he has not addressed a press conference. Instead, he sends jejune Odumakin on what the Yoruba call the errand of the toilet. And Odumakin obeys, loyal acolyte of a demon. In ‘’Deconstructing Buhari and his apologists,” I warned that Buhari’s utterances would signal doom in Nigeria. They did. May Buhari reap the fruits of his doings.

Since the conclusion of the April elections, certain persons have been making strenuous attempts to impugn the integrity of the process. First was Chief Bisi Akande, national chair of the ACN who said the National Assembly elections were not free and fair, thus indirectly castigating the victory of his own party. Somehow, these ‘progressives’ always do things badly. Then, there was constitutional lawyer, Prof Itse Sagay, who delivered this verdict: “Jega should stop deceiving himself and the international observers should also stop deceiving themselves. The 2011 elections were a failure, far from any international standard and comparable to the 2007 elections when Iwu allocated figures.” This kind of comedy—I dey laugh o—from a respected professor of law! Were the international observers also “deceiving themselves” in 2003 and 2007 when they criticised the elections? Lest we forget, this was the same SAN who, evidently without reading the judgement of the Appeal Court, said Segun Oni should be jailed for rigging election in Ekiti.

But hear Abubakar Malami (the name sounds like Salami), explaining the post-election violence in the North: “ Our national history has taught us that the determination to win elections by incumbents by any means (sic) has always given birth to spontaneous reactions in the form of breakdown(sic) of law and order.”

To Malami, the murder of 10 corps members and burning of houses were a “spontaneous reaction,” but to me, they were not. They were carefully orchestrated by the CPC bigwigs, and their principal, Buhari, had no kind words for the parents of the corps members who were killed, and for those patriotic northerners who suffered loss of lives and property, including the Emir of Kano, His Eminence, Alhaji Ado Bayero, whose palace was torched by the murderous lunatics in the CPC.

And then listen to Buhari, speaking through Odumakin as usual: “It is galling that a president who has not shaken off the allegation (sic) that he distributed dollars within Nigeria will value a slain corp member who would have been a breadwinner for life for his family at a token of N5 million.”

This is hypocrisy, Buhari’s stock-in-trade when he is not shedding crocodile tears. One, it wasn’t the president who asked lunatics to take the law into their own hands. Two, the president never said that the N5 million represented the value of the dead, nor did he even call the money a form of compensation. Three, while the president was saying “Don’t rig for me; my ambition is not worth the life of any Nigerian,” Buhari was saying “Ku gama da shi.” Four, it wasn’t the president’s party men but the CPC who unleashed violence—indeed, PDP men were prime targets in the mayhem unleashed by Buhari’s supporters. Five, what compensation is Buhari prepared to pay the families of these corps members, even if it is only a kind word?

And then the issue of dollars. Is Buhari angry because he did not get his own share of the dollars which he said the president distributed? Does Buhari want to pretend that he didn’t spend ‘dollars’ during the election? Were his newspaper advertisements placed on credit? Were his campaigns funded by the N200 a certain citizen donated? Were his posters printed with sand? Why does this fellow always pretend to be the most honest Nigerian? Was he not the same human being who said Sani Abacha didn’t steal Nigerian money? Was PTDF totally run without corruption? Buhari should be careful how he rides his moral horse. But he will not be careful because the dog that will get lost never heeds the hunter’s whistle.

Buhari and his gang may continue to denigrate the person of the president and crucify Jega, but Nigerians and the international community know the truth. Indeed, as Bolanle Babawole has said: “No more will this country be taken as anyone’s fiefdom and no more will anyone be allowed to ride roughshod over the popular will of the people. Nigerians have spoken—and they did so without any ambiguity.”

Awolaja is on the Politics Desk of the Nigerian Tribune.

http://tribune.com.ng/index.php/opinion/22309-2011-elections-and-enemies-of-nigeria

Daddy? Do all Fairy Tales begin with Once Upon ATime? - No, there is a whole series of Fairy Tales that begin with 'If
Elected I promise’

Useless Medical Advice

A patient was waiting nervously in the examination room of a famous specialist.
"So who did you see before coming to me?" asked the doctor.
"My local General Practitioner."
"Your GP?" scoffed the doctor. "What a waste of time. Tell me, what sort of useless advice did he give you?"
"He told me to come and see you."

Alligator Shoes
A blonde was on vacation in the Everglades. She wanted to take home a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking.
After becoming very frustrated with the "no haggle on prices" attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, "Well then, maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator, so I can get a pair of shoes for free!"
The shopkeeper said with a sly, knowing smile, "Little lady, just go and give it a try!"
The blonde headed out toward the swamps, determined to catch an alligator.
Later in the day, as the shopkeeper was driving home, he pulls over to the side of the levee where he spots that same young woman standing waist deep in the murky bayou water, shotgun in hand.
Just then, he spots a huge nine-foot gator swimming rapidly toward her. With lightning speed, she takes aim, fires, kills the creature and hauls it onto the slimy bank of the swamp. Lying nearby are seven more of the dead creatures, all lying on their backs.
As the shopkeeper stands on the bank, watching in silent amazement, the blonde struggles and flips the gator onto its back. Rolling her eyes heavenward and screaming in great frustration, she shouts out, "Rats! This one's barefoot too!"

What has the Nigerian soldiers done to the Northern villages when Northern fundamentalists who wantonly killed thousands of Nigerians, including security operatives? There is no military plane to raid anywhere because there is no oil in the North to engage in illegal oil bunkering in the name of peace keeping operation. JTF is a criminal organization and should be checked.

This decision is not out of cowardice, but it was reached basically on humanitarian reasons as many Ijaw and Urhobo communities have had untold suffering with over hundreds of people lost their lives in Ayakoromor 1st December 2010, in the hands of Nigerian soldiers who killed innocent community as reprisal for their lost soldiers in battle with NDLF soldiers .

It has come to our knowledge that the Ayakoromor community and neighbouring villages have fled their homes for the past few days over the bloody confrontation in the creeks and are suffering in our fight against federal authorities for barely seven months. Therefore, we want them to return home to start their normal lives without fear as law abiding citizens. Federal government by this notice should demilitarize the region for happiness of the Ayakoromor community and environs. We want to also assure the multinational oil companies NDLF has de-activated and neutralized all planted time-bombs in oil installations over the months. Therefore, their equipment is safe with NDLF.

While we have abandoned our barracks in the creeks, the government should know that these boys are no longer in the NDLF control which if, urgent step is not taken to integrate them into the federal government amnesty programme, the resultant effect could be imagined than said. We therefore, appeal to the federal government to make a quick decision so as to withdraw the weapons from NDLF. Don’t forget JTF did not destroy and capture any NDLF weapons. NDLF armoury is still intact and shall be surrendered unconditionally at federal government’s demand for permanent peace in the creeks.

please read the full text here:

http://www.saharareporters.com/press-release/press-statement-niger-delta-group-ndlf-led-john-togo-declares-end-militancy

Saharareporters received this press statement from "Mack Anthony" the spokesperson for a MEND affililiate declaring that the "End of the last battle" in the statement Niger Delta Liberation Force (NDLF explained why the last band of its fighters surrendered and abandoned Israel Barracks after incessant bombardment by the Joint Military Taskforce (JTF) since last week.

See full statement below:

We have fought a good fight. This is dawn of a new day. Nigerian army will make a great historic diary about NDLF soldiers led by General John Togo. This war is avoidable war; but criminal injustice by the Nigerian majority ethnic nationalities on the minority ethnic nationalities has turned everybody a casualty of war. And things fall apart. We are aware JTF is still counting their monumental losses just as NDLF counts its losses in the battle. NDLF gave JTF a great fight. The world has known that the Niger Delta problem is still unresolved, despite federal amnesty.

This is much like a speech of a fallen hero in battle with tears and heavy face. Today, we hereby declared that the Joint Task Force (JTF) has won the final battle in the creek. Though, the war is not over yet in Niger Delta. People of Niger Delta shall win the final war one day against criminal injustice and marginalization over 50 years of forcefully taking our God given blessings of oil and Gas wealth from the people to build distant rocky villages in the north to modern cities, leaving the people of Niger Delta in abject poverty and penury. The future battle may not be with NDLF or General John Togo with arms and bombs again, except justice and fair play reign in Niger Delta.

The historic Niger Delta struggle is a process and in stage by stage. Many have come and played their roles and have left the stage. Today, it is the turn of NDLF, led by General John Togo with the theme “post amnesty conference” between federal government and arms agitators in Niger Delta to address the grey areas of federal government amnesty programme.

Among key areas to address are; state creation, abolishment of military land use decree, equal sharing formula of oil and Gas wealth and measures for rapid infrastructural development in Niger Delta. These were the issues late President Yar’Adua wanted to discuss with us before his death.

The NDLF leadership in line with the gentleman agreement with the authorities of the federal amnesty programme which was directed by President Goodluck Jonathan for enduring peace in Niger has hereby directed all soldiers of NDLF in our camps, including the Israel barracks to vacate the creeks to their various towns and villages, waiting further formal prouncement from Mr. President to hand over unconditionally all NDLF weapons to the Nigerian army through the coordinator of the federal amnesty programme and special adviser to the president on Niger Delta Mr. Kingsley Kuku and his team on a later date.

rasputinn:
[size=16pt]rasputinn blasts Buhari[/size] !

Abi o
Battle for the Presidency; scene 1 act 2

From the stable of Thisday:

Jonathan Not Attacked in Uganda, Says Niboro

By Ahamefula Ogbu

13 May 2011

"The Presidency has denied reports that the convoy of President Goodluck Jonathan was attacked in Uganda where he is attending African Union (AU) meeting.

In a response to THISDAY inquiries on the reported attack, the Senior Special Adviser to the President on Media and Publicity, Mr. Ima Niboro, said the report was not true and advised that it be discountenanced.

So who is telling the truth?

"There was no attack. We only passed by opposition elements, whose leader returned to Uganda today (yesterday), during a peaceful procession on our way to the airport", he explained.

However, some wired reports claimed that the convoy of Jonathan was stoned and pelted with pebbles. They did not advance reasons why what they claimed happened."

Guys, don't get your adrenalin up over a non issue please

From the stable of Thisday:

Jonathan Not Attacked in Uganda, Says Niboro

By Ahamefula Ogbu

13 May 2011

"The Presidency has denied reports that the convoy of President Goodluck Jonathan was attacked in Uganda where he is attending African Union (AU) meeting.

In a response to THISDAY inquiries on the reported attack, the Senior Special Adviser to the President on Media and Publicity, Mr. Ima Niboro, said the report was not true and advised that it be discountenanced.

So who is telling the truth?

"There was no attack. We only passed by opposition elements, whose leader returned to Uganda today (yesterday), during a peaceful procession on our way to the airport", he explained.

However, some wired reports claimed that the convoy of Jonathan was stoned and pelted with pebbles. They did not advance reasons why what they claimed happened."

Scott and Tom went camping. After they got their tent all set up, they fell sound asleep.
Some hours later, Scott wakes his friend and says, "Tom, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."
Tom replies, "I see millions of stars."
"What does that tell you?" asked Scott.
Tom ponders for a minute, then says, "Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies, and potentially billions of planets.
Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three in the morning.
Theologically, it's evident the Lord is all-powerful and we are small, and insignificant.
Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow.
What does it tell you, Scott?"
Scott is silent for a moment, then says, "Tom, you idi*t, someone has stolen our tent."

A lady lost her handbag in the bustle of shopping at the mall. It was found by an honest little boy and returned to her.
Looking in her purse, she commented, "Hmmm, That's funny. When I lost my bag there was a $20 bill in it. Now there are twenty $1 bills."
The boy quickly replied, "That's right, lady. The last time I found a lady's purse, she didn't have any change for a reward."

FAITH UNDER FIRE
Muslim-on-Christian violence expands in Africa
In Nigeria, pastor killed; in Egypt, Copts die
Posted: May 10, 2011
9:55 pm Eastern

By Michael Carl
© 2011 WorldNetDaily

http://www.wnd.com/index.php?fa=PAGE.view&pageId=297357

Violence against Christians in Muslim regions of Africa is on the rise, and advocates for religious freedom are expressing concern over the deaths of 17, including the family of a Nigerian pastor, as well as the deaths of a dozen Christians in Egypt.

International Christian Concern's Nigeria specialist Jonathan Racho says there is no known motive for the Nigeria attack.

"Seventeen Christians were killed, including that pastor's family, and we were not told the reason," Racho said.

"This was a Christian village in a Muslim state. Christians have been attacked in the past and it's a part of the campaign to drive Christians from the northern part of Nigeria," Racho said of the attack in the northern village of Aurum.

Racho says he's spoken with a pastor from the village who laments that justice is not being served.

"Since 1999 in Bauchi state, several Christians have been killed, but no one has been brought to justice. The government has to intervene and the government has to be fair to all of its citizens," the pastor said, according to Racho.

Racho said the pastor's concern is well founded.

"Thousands of Christians have been killed in northern Nigeria since 1999 when Shariah law was introduced. But unfortunately, no one is being held responsible for the attacks on Christians," he said.

Listen to Racho:

He said the death toll in Nigeria – since Muslims started a terror rampage on the election to a second term of Christian President Goodluck Jonathan – has topped 600.

There also are reports that some 300 churches have been burned down amid the violence.

Racho said the actual numbers probably cannot be verified.

"The Nigerian officials arranged a mass burial of the victims because they didn't want the news to go out," he said, noting Muslim officials have good reason for keeping the casualty numbers quiet.

"They were concerned that Christians in the southern part of the country heard about the level of the brutal attacks against their brothers and sisters that they may retaliate," Racho said.

But Racho says his sources in Nigeria confirm that the attacks have been carried out by Muslims against Christians.

Nigeria isn't the only battlefield, though.

While the violence in Nigeria continues, 12 people were killed and more than 200 were wounded in Salafi Islamic attacks against three churches in a Cairo, Egypt, neighborhood.

International Christian Concern's Aidan Clay said the situation is continuing to deteriorate, and there is a reason.

"The Christians don't have protection. There are no military forces guarding their churches or offering the protection they had to an extent under former President Mubarak," Clay said.

He also said the Egyptian violence is being whipped up largely by the militant Salafist sect, using an incident from last year.

"A very large group of Salafist Muslims went outside a large Coptic Church in Cairo and began protesting. The protest was over an incident that occurred sometime last year," Clay explained.

"They claim that a couple of women who are Coptic priests' wives had converted to Islam and were being held against their will by the Coptic Church," Clay said.

Clay said when the Salafis tried to enter the church, the priests forbid them from entering. The refusal was the pretext for the Muslims to open fire.

"We're getting conflicting reports. We're not sure of the gunfire on the Coptic side but there was definitely gunfire on the Salafist side," Clay reported. "Two other churches were burned the same day."

"Again the issue was security. One report says it took security an hour to respond to the incident and the fire department an hour to respond. In that time, one of the churches burned to the ground," he said.

The reports said this is the second time in the past two months that churches have been burned by the growing militancy of the Salafists, a group that has made it clear members want Egypt to adopt Islamic law.

The Egyptian newspaper Al Masry Al Youm reported over the weekend that a group of about 200 Copts staged a sit-down strike at the U. S. embassy to call for international protection and for the government to compensate victims of the recent church burnings.

The Salafists who recently have asserted their political power have called for prosecution of the Coptic Pope Shanouda III.

Clay said the Salafis have an agenda and may be financially supported by the Saudis.

"They're trying to bring Islam back to the way it was after the death of Muhammad. It comes from the Wahhabi doctrine of Saudi Arabia and many believe they're supported by Saudi funds. So they're ultra conservative Muslims who want to impose Shariah," Clay said.

"What we're seeing now is a growing lack of trust between the Coptic Christians and the military," Clay said.

WND has reported that Nigeria is at least the third nation in recent years where there has been Muslim violence on Christians following a presidential election.

Earlier violence erupted in Ivory Coast and Kenya.

In Kenya, President Obama campaigned for the Muslim challenger, and in Ivory Coast, a Christian president was re-elected but was removed from office and replaced by a Muslim challenger earlier this year at the behest of the United States and the United Nations.


Sen. Barack Obama with Raila Odinga

It was in 2007 when the election battle and massacres developed in Kenya.

Then-Sen. Barack Obama campaigned for now-Kenyan Prime Minister Raila Odinga, a Muslim. Obama barnstormed on behalf of Odinga, a socialist who hails from the same tribal heritage, Luo, as Obama.

Appearing with Odinga at campaign stops, Obama gave speeches accusing the sitting Kenyan president of being corrupt and oppressive.

On Aug. 29, 2007, Odinga signed a secret Memorandum of Understanding with Muslim Sheikh Abdullah Abdi, the chief of the National Muslim Leaders Forum of Kenya. In exchange for Muslim support, Odinga promised to rewrite the Kenyan constitution to install Shariah as law in "Muslim declared regions," elevate Islam as "the only true religion" and give Islamic leaders "oversight" over other religions, establish Shariah courts and ban Christian proselytism.

Even with strong Muslim backing, Odinga was beaten in the December 2007 elections. He then accused the incumbent president of rigging the vote and allegedly incited his supporters to riot. Over the next month, some 1,500 Kenyans were killed and more than 500,000 displaced – with most of the violence led by Muslims, who set churches ablaze and hacked Christians to death with machetes.

Odinga eventually ended up as prime minister in Kenya through a power-sharing arrangement that was enacted in an effort to appease the rioters.

In Egypt, President Hosni Mubarak's regime fell shortly after the U.S. withdrew support. Since then, the Muslim Brotherhood has developed into a political force in the country as Christians have been attacked and killed.

Read more: Muslim-on-Christian violence expands in Africa http://www.wnd.com/?pageId=297357#ixzz1M8bRURFk

FAITH UNDER FIRE
Muslim-on-Christian violence expands in Africa
In Nigeria, pastor killed; in Egypt, Copts die
Posted: May 10, 2011
9:55 pm Eastern

By Michael Carl
© 2011 WorldNetDaily

http://www.wnd.com/index.php?fa=PAGE.view&pageId=297357

Violence against Christians in Muslim regions of Africa is on the rise, and advocates for religious freedom are expressing concern over the deaths of 17, including the family of a Nigerian pastor, as well as the deaths of a dozen Christians in Egypt.

International Christian Concern's Nigeria specialist Jonathan Racho says there is no known motive for the Nigeria attack.

"Seventeen Christians were killed, including that pastor's family, and we were not told the reason," Racho said.

"This was a Christian village in a Muslim state. Christians have been attacked in the past and it's a part of the campaign to drive Christians from the northern part of Nigeria," Racho said of the attack in the northern village of Aurum.

Racho says he's spoken with a pastor from the village who laments that justice is not being served.

"Since 1999 in Bauchi state, several Christians have been killed, but no one has been brought to justice. The government has to intervene and the government has to be fair to all of its citizens," the pastor said, according to Racho.

Racho said the pastor's concern is well founded.

"Thousands of Christians have been killed in northern Nigeria since 1999 when Shariah law was introduced. But unfortunately, no one is being held responsible for the attacks on Christians," he said.

Listen to Racho:

He said the death toll in Nigeria – since Muslims started a terror rampage on the election to a second term of Christian President Goodluck Jonathan – has topped 600.

There also are reports that some 300 churches have been burned down amid the violence.

Racho said the actual numbers probably cannot be verified.

"The Nigerian officials arranged a mass burial of the victims because they didn't want the news to go out," he said, noting Muslim officials have good reason for keeping the casualty numbers quiet.

"They were concerned that Christians in the southern part of the country heard about the level of the brutal attacks against their brothers and sisters that they may retaliate," Racho said.

But Racho says his sources in Nigeria confirm that the attacks have been carried out by Muslims against Christians.

Nigeria isn't the only battlefield, though.

While the violence in Nigeria continues, 12 people were killed and more than 200 were wounded in Salafi Islamic attacks against three churches in a Cairo, Egypt, neighborhood.

International Christian Concern's Aidan Clay said the situation is continuing to deteriorate, and there is a reason.

"The Christians don't have protection. There are no military forces guarding their churches or offering the protection they had to an extent under former President Mubarak," Clay said.

He also said the Egyptian violence is being whipped up largely by the militant Salafist sect, using an incident from last year.

"A very large group of Salafist Muslims went outside a large Coptic Church in Cairo and began protesting. The protest was over an incident that occurred sometime last year," Clay explained.

"They claim that a couple of women who are Coptic priests' wives had converted to Islam and were being held against their will by the Coptic Church," Clay said.

Clay said when the Salafis tried to enter the church, the priests forbid them from entering. The refusal was the pretext for the Muslims to open fire.

"We're getting conflicting reports. We're not sure of the gunfire on the Coptic side but there was definitely gunfire on the Salafist side," Clay reported. "Two other churches were burned the same day."

"Again the issue was security. One report says it took security an hour to respond to the incident and the fire department an hour to respond. In that time, one of the churches burned to the ground," he said.

The reports said this is the second time in the past two months that churches have been burned by the growing militancy of the Salafists, a group that has made it clear members want Egypt to adopt Islamic law.

The Egyptian newspaper Al Masry Al Youm reported over the weekend that a group of about 200 Copts staged a sit-down strike at the U. S. embassy to call for international protection and for the government to compensate victims of the recent church burnings.

The Salafists who recently have asserted their political power have called for prosecution of the Coptic Pope Shanouda III.

Clay said the Salafis have an agenda and may be financially supported by the Saudis.

"They're trying to bring Islam back to the way it was after the death of Muhammad. It comes from the Wahhabi doctrine of Saudi Arabia and many believe they're supported by Saudi funds. So they're ultra conservative Muslims who want to impose Shariah," Clay said.

"What we're seeing now is a growing lack of trust between the Coptic Christians and the military," Clay said.

WND has reported that Nigeria is at least the third nation in recent years where there has been Muslim violence on Christians following a presidential election.

Earlier violence erupted in Ivory Coast and Kenya.

In Kenya, President Obama campaigned for the Muslim challenger, and in Ivory Coast, a Christian president was re-elected but was removed from office and replaced by a Muslim challenger earlier this year at the behest of the United States and the United Nations.


Sen. Barack Obama with Raila Odinga

It was in 2007 when the election battle and massacres developed in Kenya.

Then-Sen. Barack Obama campaigned for now-Kenyan Prime Minister Raila Odinga, a Muslim. Obama barnstormed on behalf of Odinga, a socialist who hails from the same tribal heritage, Luo, as Obama.

Appearing with Odinga at campaign stops, Obama gave speeches accusing the sitting Kenyan president of being corrupt and oppressive.

On Aug. 29, 2007, Odinga signed a secret Memorandum of Understanding with Muslim Sheikh Abdullah Abdi, the chief of the National Muslim Leaders Forum of Kenya. In exchange for Muslim support, Odinga promised to rewrite the Kenyan constitution to install Shariah as law in "Muslim declared regions," elevate Islam as "the only true religion" and give Islamic leaders "oversight" over other religions, establish Shariah courts and ban Christian proselytism.

Even with strong Muslim backing, Odinga was beaten in the December 2007 elections. He then accused the incumbent president of rigging the vote and allegedly incited his supporters to riot. Over the next month, some 1,500 Kenyans were killed and more than 500,000 displaced – with most of the violence led by Muslims, who set churches ablaze and hacked Christians to death with machetes.

Odinga eventually ended up as prime minister in Kenya through a power-sharing arrangement that was enacted in an effort to appease the rioters.

In Egypt, President Hosni Mubarak's regime fell shortly after the U.S. withdrew support. Since then, the Muslim Brotherhood has developed into a political force in the country as Christians have been attacked and killed.

Read more: Muslim-on-Christian violence expands in Africa http://www.wnd.com/?pageId=297357#ixzz1M8bRURFk

Nigeria: Where the Congress for Progressive Change (CPC) got it wrong
Author: Dangari | May 11, 2011
Perhaps no other political party in the history of this country has to its credit a strong tsunami wind like the Congress for Progressive Change, CPC, which berthed boldly in the murky Nigerian political water under the captainship of General Muhammadu Buhari. In less than six months became a force to be reckoned with in the country’s politicking.

The party at inception came in at the time the Nigerian electorates, especially the masses, were agitating for a shift and an ultimate change in the country’s democratic setting. And from the beginning the party without doubt had the sympathy of most Nigerians, irrespective of political, religious or ideological differences. majority of Nigerians were really fed up with the ruling PDP and wanted a change from the un-focused and unstable policies of the party over the past twelve years. They wanted a change from the Katakata and internal wahala that was then bedeviling the party and some of its corrupt and myopic party officials.

And like God sent, the CPC berthed at the stormy political season and a majority, especially here in the northern part, where the party had a cult-like followership, saw it as a final liberator from the hardship and poverty that have continued to ravage them over the years. They saw the sincerity and patriotic zeal of its leader, General Buhari, to take them to the Promised Land and as expected most of them willingly boarded the phenomenon fast moving political train of the charismatic General and the whole world waited to see the outcome of the much expected April elections.

The party,as predicted by most analyst, did not disappoint its followers in the first election, where they swept most of the seats in the northern parts of the country and uprooted the all- powerful and money inducing PDP. The majority of the talakawas were really happy and most Nigerians, I believe, thought that at last the Nigerian political arena now has a formidable opposition party that could boldly tackle the PDP ;this is coupled with the emergence of another phenomenon party the Action Congress of Nigeria, ACN ,under the guardianship of Ahmed Tinubu,whose party gave PDP a bloody nose in all the south-west states. And then came the now controversial presidential election and without warning the CPC under some of its misinformed and undemocratic supporters took a fatal step that set them tumbling backward disgracefully, a step that cost them all the anticipated seats across the states where they hitherto had a strong patriotic support.

The CPC got it wrong from that very moment when the leadership failed to checkmate the barbaric post-election political violence that shocked every right thinking human being across the country. They got it wrong for allowing some hoodlums to hijack the goodwill of the Nigerian people; especially some of the struggling masses who got their houses burnt and lost their lives in the orgy of madness that took over sense of reasoning of some of the so-called party supporters and sympathizers.
The CPC got it all wrong for not appreciating its sudden rise and gains in the 2011 election, despite its short sojourn into the political arena.

They failed to consolidate on their victories at the grass roots and nurse their patience silently to prepare and fight democratically another day. They got it wrong and failed to understand that Nigeria is bigger and broader than being popular and famous in only a section of the country. They got it wrong, for the leaders failed to see the huge resources and manpower being deployed by the ruling party and the desperation of some of its candidates to win at all cost. Importantly, the CPC got it wrong for allowing itself to be painted with regional, religious and tribal coloration.

They failed to comprehend that globalization is fast breaking down the walls of segregation and regional sentiment and the PDP were quick to capitalize on this weakness, which saw them bounce back confidently to snatch the various contested positions across the country, with a superlative collaboration with the ACN during the presidential race. Again the CPC failed to see the writing on the wall that the party was not at peace with itself in most of the states across the north, where some of its members were busy rumbling with each other and the glaring shame of lack of internal democracy among its candidates. They folded their arms and watched as other parties were getting set and ready for the gubernatorial elections, while their own candidates were busy slugging it out in various courts across the country.
http://www.ngex.com/news/public/article.php?ArticleID=1888

A young man was walking through a supermarket to pick up a few things when he noticed an old lady following him around. Thinking nothing of it, he ignored her and continued on.
Finally he went to the check-out line, but she got in front of him. "Pardon me," she said, "I'm sorry if my staring at you has made you feel uncomfortable. It's just that you look just like my son, who I haven't seen in a long time."
"That's a shame," replied the young man, "is there anything I can do for you?"
"Yes," she said, "As I'm leaving, can you say 'Good bye, Mother!'? It would make me feel so much better."
"Sure," answered the young man. So, when the old woman was leaving, he called out, "Goodbye, Mother!"
As he stepped up to the check-out counter, he saw that his total was $127.50. "How can that be?" he asked, "I only purchased a few things!"
The clerk replied, "Your mother said that you would pay for her."

I was helping a friend of mine with his roadside farm stand when a man stopped by and asked how much the eggs were.
"Sixty cents for the small, seventy cents for the medium, ninety cents for the large and thirty cents for the cracked ones," I answered.
"All right," he said. "Crack me a dozen of the large ones."

At the end of their first date, a young man takes his favorite girl home. Emboldened by the night, he decides to try for that important first kiss.

With an air of confidence, he leans with his hand against the wall and, smiling, he says to her, "Darling, how about a goodnight kiss?"

Horrified, she replies, "Are you mad? My parents will see us!"

"Oh, come on! Who's going to see us at this hour?"

"No, please. Can you imagine if we got caught?"

"Oh, come on. There's nobody around. They're all sleeping!"

"No way. It's just too risky!"

"Oh, please, please. I like you so much!"

"No, no and no. I like you too, but I just can't!"

"Oh, yes you can. Please!"

"No, no. I just can't."

"Pleeeeease!"

Out of the blue, the porch light goes on and the girl's sister shows up in her pajamas, hair disheveled.
In a sleepy voice, the sister says, "Dad says to go ahead and give him a kiss. Or, I can do it. Or, if need be, he'll come down and do it himself. But for crying out loud, tell him to take his hand off the intercom button!"