₦airaland Forum

englishmart:
Yesterday was my birthday. I'm so happy I witnessed another birthday in sound health..
All thanks and appreciation go to those who wished me a happy birthday.
May y'all witness many years of good health and success. Amen!

I also thank God almighty for finding me worthy of being among the living.

I didn't throw a very big party though. Just a little party of 4 at summit villa..

[color=007700]]My special shout outs go to [/color]
Rozzay
Tosyne2much
Kelvingraphics
Franchise21
Caseless
Lalasticlala
Eyepencil
Evilseed
Joseph1832
Jbluv55
Kachisbarbie
Lagunna
Naijaboiy
Onila
Xynerise
Samflexxy
Obinoscopy
Idowuogbo
Vivly
Teeo
Jennimma (miss nairaland)
Krone
Iyabode
Ferano
Seun

www.nairaland.com/attachments/1847806_mrenglishmart1_jpege8d4601041e49e0fbbd3767a2e364675

Wishing u more prosperous yrs ahead

englishmart:
ROZZAY pls.
Thanks

I vote Rozzay

englishmart:
bros abeg, visit this link and vote rozzay 4 miss nairaland. Just type. I vote rozzay.
Thanks

www.nairaland.com/1986755/miss-nairaland-december-2014-contest/8#27829189

Where's ma bribe?

engrsyer:
On Friday, 7th Nov, we all watch the official commissioning of a stadium built by Gov. God'swill Akpabio. Again Gov. Rotimi Amaechi of Rivers State used his newly built Rivers State Stadium (Abiyesimaka) stadium to host APC for his seven(7) years in office. What can we now say on comparism between the two(2) stadia in South South of Nigeria which is better?

Incomparable... one is a sporting complex while d oda z just a stadium. Both r magnificent

englishmart:
you should know I'm a very nice guy. I don't do stuff like those

Lolz... Trust no one, so I don't believe u

englishmart:
It's world Sperm Day Today, let's have a moment of silence in honour of those children who were not born, but were.....

1. Swallowed during a Mouth Action.

2. Thrown away in a condom.

3. Left behind in trousers after Masturbation.

4. Dropped on someone's breast and died in tissue paper.

5. Slipped on someone's hips and washed away with the bath water.

Consider yourself very lucky to be alive.
Happy Global SPERMS

Don't ask me the source

Lolz... Englishmart, ain't u guilty of all?

Sijo01:
I don't gerit.

op, review your post.

Fixed

Thirteen people died in Friday’s deadly bomb attack on
Azare town in Bauchi state, the police have said.
According to the Force Public Relations Officer, Emmanuel
Ojukwu, 10 other people suffered various degrees of
injuries in the explosion.
Mr. Ojukwu, a commissioner of police, also said detectives
have begun investigation into the incident, with five
suspects already arrested.
The identities of the suspects were however not disclosed.
A twin explosion had occurred at the premises of the Azare
branch of First Bank earlier today.
A witness said the bomb blast occurred at the Automated
Teller Machine (ATM) of the bank as customers were
queuing to make withdrawals at around 9a.m.
He said eight people were killed instantly while others died
as they were being taken to hospital.
Other witnesses said mostly affected were Bauchi State civil
servants who were waiting to collect their salaries.

Two people are feared dead while 20 others suffered
various degrees of injuries during a stampede at the
inauguration ceremony of a new stadium in Akwa Ibom
state, the News Agency of Nigeria is reporting.
It is not clear yet what caused the stampede but an
international friendly between the home-based senior
national team of Nigeria, Super Eagles B, and the U-23
National Team of Ghana, the Black Meteors, was fixed to
mark the ceremony.
“It is possible football fans were scrambling to enter the
stadium to watch the match. That’s what I heard,” an Uyo
resident, who said he is on his way to the facility, said.
But while the NAN correspondent at the stadium reported
a stampede, the state Commissioner of Police, Isaac Achong,
said, “there was no stampede, there was only crowd
control. We are only controlling the crowd entering the
stadium.”
When told that journalists at the stadium reported a
stampede, he said, “I’m not aware” and terminated the call.
The President of Ghana, John Mahama and the Ivorian
Head of State, Alassane Ouattara were all expected in Uyo
to open the new edifice.
Apart from Presidents Jonathan, Mahama and Ouattara, a
number of governors from across Nigeria are expected,
while the President of the Nigeria Football Federation,
Amaju Melvin Pinnick and some Executive Committee
members and Management staff arrived Uyo on Thursday
evening.
The 30,000 – capacity venue, with a bullet –proof State Box
that has 70 seats, has been described by the Vice President
of Ghana Football Association, Fred Crentsil (who was sent
by CAF to inspect the venue) as being “among the best you
can find anywhere in the world”.
Governor Godswill Akpabio, who is the chief host, is
showcasing the majestic facility, which has already been
approved by the Confederation of African Football for the
crucial 2015 Africa Cup of Nations qualifier between
Nigeria and South Africa on November 19, as one of the
key infrastructure he has delivered for the oil-rich State.

StrongPenis:
MILF! MILF! MILF! * runs to get his vaseline*

Wat u gonna use it to do?

Jarus:
It was obvious Musa was going to make the list. He even made Top 10 last year and emerged 9th Best Player in Africa in 2013.

Unfortunately, that's how far he could go this year again. Maybe a little up, to like 5th.

Martins should have made this 25 man list and even a top contender if that performance was in Europe.

An average year for African footballers, compared to when there used to the time of the Drogbas and Eto'os of this world.

If Okocha of 2003-2005 and Essien of 2004-2007 had enacted the performance that didn't win them the award in those years (no thanks to Eto'o and Drogba), those performances would have easily won them the award this year.

My prediction for Top 3
Asamoah Gyanq
Pierre Agyuemang
Slimani (Algeria)

Asamoah Gyan may clinch it.

Meanwhile, FTC. Dedicated to Musiwa, my Nairaland menthol.

Then where u keep Yaya Toure?

The Nigerian military and a mobile police unit have started
advancing to the commercial border town of Mubi,
Adamawa state.
The town along with some other communities in Adamawa
and Borno states were taken over by Boko Haram in the
last few weeks.
Sources say that the police unit, which appeared battle
ready, was headed to the troubled area not only to flush
out the terrorists but also to liberate Vintim, the home
town of the Chief of Defence Staff, Alex Badeh, one of the
communities currently under the control of Boko Haram.
One of the fleeing residents, Bitrus Gajere, said the mobile
police special anti-terrorist unit had already reached
Marraba Mubi Junction, about 18 kilometres from Mubi
town.
Other reports say the Nigerian military backing the police
unit and led by a colonel was at Pella Junction, 80
kilometres from Mubi.
Mr. Gajere expressed his happiness at the development.
“It may lead to the end of the trauma occasioned by the
dismal performance of Nigerian troops who always flee
whenever insurgents strike, leading to the fall of many
towns and villages,” he said.
Two residents of Marraba Mubi, Yohanna Gambo and
Sanda Zira, told reporters in Yola that they saw a
detachment of mobile police officers keeping vigil at the
junction leading to Mubi and Michika Local Governments.
“In fact, we are shocked and surprised to see a handful of
mobile police officer because since the fall of Mubi, we
have not seen a security man,” Mr. Gambo said.
Meanwhile, efforts to reach the spokesperson of the
Adamawa Police Command, Othman Abubakar, a deputy
superintendent of police, were unsuccessful as calls to his
mobile phone were diverted.
Contrary to the claim by the Nigerian military that it was
on top of the situation in Mubi, reports say Boko Haram is
consolidating its position in the captured town and indeed
renamed it “Madinatul Islam” meaning the city of Islam.
Trapped residents said the insurgents were having a field
day; holding open court and preaching sessions as they
threaten to marry off spinsters to bachelors and open shops
that were closed by their owners.
Musa Aliyu, one of the trapped residents, said: “They asked
us to go about our normal business without fear of being
killed. They warned shop owners to come back and open
their shops; if not, the shops would be opened by force.
The insurgents are now holding public courts and
preaching at the emir’s palace and threatened to marry off
girls in for a dowry of N2,000 to N5,000. For now there is
calm in the town, though we could hear gunshots at the
outskirts.”

The Borno state government on Thursday received 42
suspected Boko Haram terrorists captured by the Nigerian
army.
The military said the 42, after months and years in
detention, were cleared of all suspicions following thorough
investigations.
The military said three of the 42 released suspects were
foreigners from Chad, Cameroon and Burkina Faso.
The deputy director, Defence Information, Sani Usman, a
colonel, who handed the freed suspects over to Governor
Kashim Shettima said they were arrested during various
military raids.
Mr. Usman said each of the freed prisoners were given
N100,000 to enable them continue with their normal lives
as free citizens.
“We in the Nigeria army will continue to do our best in the
ongoing fight against insurgency until we get rid of this
problem,” he said.
Mr. Shetima commended the military for its magnanimity.
“We commend the fairness, equity and justice displayed by
the Nigeria Armed Forces towards releasing anybody found
not to be involved in these terrorist activities,” he said.
“Amongst them are students, tailors, mechanics, provision
stores owners and of course, quite a handful of them are
drivers. We have a moral obligation to ensure that these
young men at this time of their lives are actively engaged.
Along this line, I wish to direct the road maintenance
agency to include those that are drivers as employed truck
drivers, while those that are tailors should be engaged in
sewing uniforms for students and pupils in line with our
education transformation program.
“Those that are farmers should be given the resources to
improve their farming; while the traders would be given
some token in addition to what the military gave them to
boost their trade. The students among them should be
assisted to return to school.”
Some of the freed prisoners had spent detention times
ranging from three years, two years to some months. They
were full of gratitude to get what one of them, a 300-level
student of Chemistry, said was another chance at life.

I wonder y ppl will come out en masse to rally wiv dis bunch of polithiefcians... Wen dey get into power, dey wud all forget d masses dat voted them in n enrich their pockets. Nigerians!!! grow up

Crystalsemerald:
Wetin you taking the money do then ? Clean yiansh ?

I rebuking him n his money

englishmart:
All I see is one gay from the east

How u take knw?

Aizebioje:
Oga oooo. Uniben has been offering animal science since ooo don't say what you don't know pls. Always make research before commenting biko.

If u say so

Thewhizzkid1:
Animal science nko? I was given dix course last year instead of med at Uniben. Some schools wicked sha..Thank God I have med now..

Oga, if u wan lie, lie with code. when Uniben start to dey offer animal science? Dey offer zoology and not animal science

WTF!!! N50,000 fine? Will she also replace d tenant's Properties dat were destroyed?

Royat1:
. Whenever I score late goals while playing pes I move around d house shouting goal, mummy mo ti no pa .no play again

Dats an exception, whenever I score late goals, I just move my hands in d way managers normally do

lekjons:
punchin or tryna hit smtn/sm1 while playin....1 day @ a game-house,i lost d final pk,out of frustratn i punched 1 horrible-lookin guy wey sit beside me,blazin him own weed jeje..d way he turned 2 look at me wit dat his rabbit eyes(red eyes),i knw in ma mind dat dere's gon b trouble,damn! i'll never 4get dat day,dat modafuker turned me into a punchin bag..chai!..come c hw pple dey help me beg!

Hehehe. See gobe!!!

No weird habits at all. Just sit down, smile n enjoy my soccer... Dats all

Crystalsemerald:
Does he knowing anything ? Wait Mr lesural, don'tu you do floging in the university ? He's making noise and you can't asking him to wash student toilet and he's giving u bribe nd u collecting !!! My money !!! ? Chai ! Mr lectural i killy you, you better Usain Bolt for your life......., Crocz ooo, bring my Bajinantu !!!

I never said I collecting d money

Crystalsemerald:
Date you ? Oga you don take everything naah. I cook soup, you no let me eat yet you still block my nose frm perceiving the aroma. Oga you know say warri pikin no dey carry last ooo.

Den Bini pikin dey always carry first

Crystalsemerald:
And after we vote for u, what is our 'my' own commision ?

My own is, if I vote for her, wud she date me if she wins?

Crystalsemerald:
Choi !!! 3rd whaaaaat !!! ? Crocz !! *red eye* come here, you and ur lecsural who is tolding me liar ? What did u told me when u came bak home, that u finished with 1st class ? And u know say Warri boy no dey carry last.

Lolz. Does he knowing book? He only knows to make noise in class. Carrying expo to exam hall, and wen I catches him, he coming to my office later to bribing me so dat I passing him

Crocz:
But I already studied Franchising na

Cos of ur low grade, u gats do post graduate diploma, PGD, before u can apply for Masters in Franchising

tit:
this is the work of APC corpoters

U seff. Lemme reserve ma comnents

The Minister of Foreign Affairs, Aminu Wali, on Friday
protested the continued discrimination and profiling of
Nigerians by some countries over the outbreak of the Ebola
disease in West Africa.
At an interactive session with members of the diplomatic
corps, Mr. Wali named 22 countries that had targeted and
discriminated against Nigerians, since the index case of
Ebola in Nigeria.
He said it was regrettable that discrimination against
Nigerians persisted, in spite of the World Health
Organisation, WHO, declaration that Nigeria was Ebola-
free.
He said it was regrettable that some countries had chosen
to flout WHO rules and protocols on preventing the spread
of the virus, through deliberate policies of stigmatisation
and discrimination.
He said the foreign ministry has received unpleasant
reports that Nigerians have been targeted and
discriminated in Bahrain, Cote d’Ivoire, Equatorial Guinea
and Cameroon.
Other countries discriminating against Nigerians are Cuba,
Gabon, China, Egypt, Hong Kong, Kuwait, Qatar, Sri Lanka,
Turkey and Zambia.
Also in the list are Mauritania, Sao Tome and Principe,
South Africa, United Arab Emirates, Ukraine, Namibia,
Seychelles and South Sudan.
The minister expressed dismay that even top government
officials on working visits abroad had suffered
discriminatory practices by the countries.
He noted that it was “intriguing’’ that it took time for the
international community to acknowledge the valiant and
effective measures taken by Nigeria to contain the spread
of the deadly virus.
“It is therefore, my hope that this briefing will assist in
expunging any negative notion about the Ebola Virus in
Nigeria,’’ he said.
Mr. Wali called on the international community to increase
assistance to the countries afflicted with the deadly virus.
He pledged that Nigeria would continue to assist
neighbouring countries and share its experience on the
successful control of the virus with the rest of the world.
A Nigerian, Suleiman Mohammed, who is the Honorary
Consul to Mongolia, recounted how he was detained for six
hours in Seoul after alighting from his flight.
He said he was detained for several hours by the
immigration authorities in South Korea alongside with
Nigeria’s ambassador to South Korea, Amb. Desmond
Akawor.
Mr. Mohammed said the incident happened on September
9.
He added that he was subjected to the same treatment
when he was transiting through South Korea even after he
had shown no symptoms of the virus.
In his remarks, the High Commissioner of Trinidad and
Tobago partly blamed the discrimination against travellers
from West Africa on the international media and
ignorance.
“From Trinidad and Tobago and the Caribbean, there is
mass hysteria and ignorance on this issue (Ebola).
“The international media is constantly reporting that there
is Ebola in West Africa and some people think West Africa
is a country and not a region and in the Caribbean that
understanding is not clear.’’
He cited an incident where union workers at a port in
Trinidad and Tobago refused to board an oil-tanker that
berthed in his country from Gabon.
He said there was hysteria that the vessel that arrived from
West Africa may have been exposed to Ebola.
Meanwhile, South Sudan has refused entry to Nigerian
Foreign Service officers deployed to the country because of
Ebola.
In his contribution, the South Sudan Ambassador to
Nigeria, Parmena Mangar Riak, claimed that after the WHO
certification on Oct. 20, some Nigerians received their visas
to travel to the country last week.
Dean of the Diplomatic Corps and Cameroon Ambassador to
Nigeria, Salaheddine Abbas-Ibrahima, claimed that many
countries had lifted restrictions on travel from people from
Nigeria after the WHO certification.
He assured the minister that “in a matter of days” there
would be total lifting of the ban on restrictions of travel by
Nigerians by the remaining countries.
The ambassador who did not name the countries that had
relaxed the ban said that Cameroon would take advantage
of the Ebola information centre, established by the Federal
government.
He said the centre would serve as a source of information
for countries to plan their national response to the deadly
virus.

Girls, d easiest n fastest way to a man's heart z thru his stomach. If u decide not to be cooking frequently wen u visit, trust me there r oda girls outside willing to do so

pasqal09:
So what's the girlfriend suppose to do when she visits? Balance on his bed while he cooks for her?

Confirm question

Crocz:
Seriously?

Gats apply for PGD in Franchising