₦airaland Forum

FromZeroToHero:
"Dad, can you loan me N500,000?," Kola asked his father.
"What for son?," his father asked.
"For my wedding.
"By our calculations, we're falling short meeting the cost."
Kola had come to meet his parents with his fiancé.
"Your wedding?
"How much is the total cost of the wedding?," his father asked.
"N3.6 million.
"We're thinking of starting the committee next week.
"We can together give about N800,000 and expect our friends to help us raise about N2 million.
"I remember you told me if ever I need help, I can come to you," Kola answered.
His father held him by the shoulder and said, "Go get your wife and come meet me in my study room."
"Yes, dad," Kola obliged.
Minutes later, Kola and his fiancé, Tomilayo, walked into his father's study room.
"Having a good time, my daughter?," Kola's father asked.
"Yes I am.
"You and your wife are so hospitable.
"I pray that Kola and I can emulate your marriage.
"You are an admirable couple," answered Kola's fiance.
"Thank you.
"I am delighted to have you as my daughter.
"This is your home, you're welcome anytime," said father.
They sat down.
"Thank you dad."
"So, I hear you want to spend N3.6 million for your wedding and you need me to help with N800,000?," asked father.
"Yes, we will greatly appreciate," said the fiancé.
"The wedding will be at the Total Garden, Ibadan in about six months time," said Kola.
"Why do you want to have a big wedding?," father asked.
"Well, it's our big day.
"She's always dreamt of a big wedding," Kola replied.
"Have you dreamt of a big wedding or a strong marriage?," the father asked the fiancé.
"When you put it that way, it's more of a strong marriage," said the fiancé.
"Good.
"You've answered wisely.
"So who do you expect to come for your wedding?," asked the father.
"Friends and relatives.
"About seven hundred people," answered Kola.
"How many true friends do you really have?
"I mean friends who have been tried and tested to be there for you through thick and thin?," asked the father.
Kola and Tomilayo looked at each other.
"Countable," the fiancé answered.
"So who are these other people who will come to your wedding?," asked the father.
Silence.
"OK. Let's go to the relatives.
"I know you love your relatives, but how many are really close to you?
"You barely talk with the many relatives you have," said the father.
"What are you trying to say dad?," asked Kola.
"My son, my daughter; why do you want to spend N3.6 million on a wedding, a one-day event, yet you need the money in your marriage
"Look, you are actually coming to ask me for money, you will form a committee to ask people for money; all to show off and please people, who will not even matter in your marriage!"
Silence.
The father continued, "Let me share with you my experience.
"When I married your mother, we spent about a million for the wedding.
"That was a lot of money then.
"We fed people, got stressed by service providers, just so that we put up a wedding that will win the applause of a crowd.
"But as soon as we got married, the crowd disappeared.
"All the issues that your mother and I went through, no one cared, even family couldn't do much.
"Every one is busy living their life.
"When things got tough, the crowd gossiped about us, some even seemed happy that our marriage was in trouble!"
Silence.
"I have seen this script repeated over and over.
"Brides get stressed on their wedding day, they can't even enjoy, couples being angry at friends who don't support them financially, the worst part is starting marriage in debt or struggling financially.
"Do you know a wedding doesn't have to cost so much, it doesn't have to be stressful, it doesn't have to be full of people who perhaps will never talk to you again?," added the father.
"But dad, what will people think if we do a small wedding or we don't invite them?" asked the fiancé.
"Are you getting married for people?
"If you have a small wedding with only the witnesses who matter, will you two not be married
"What is all this competition of who has a grand wedding for?
"People are competing on Facebook, in weddings; why this need to show off?
"You know that money you are about to blow in one day, you can use it to invest in your marriage, you can start the process of buying or building a home, you can save up for the needs of the children you will have because you need money to raise a family.
"Why not start your marriage financially healthy and not in debt?
"Marriage is what is more important than a wedding," continued the father.
"Dad, if you don't want to support us it's OK," said Kola.
The fiancé stopped him, saying, "No my love, dad has a point.
"I actually find the idea of a small wedding not just wise and economical, but also intimate.
"Marriage is just you and me, not people."
The father spoke, "My son, in all the years you have been a man, you have never come to me asking for money, but now you are asking for money to put up a show?
"I look further, I look at your marriage.
"I admire how people come together in a wedding committee to raise money and I wonder, what if couples and people use that same energy to put up a business that will uplift families.
"Those members who will be part of your wedding committee, imagine if they become your investors, imagine if you build a company where you can make profit and feed your homes.
"Something sustainable."
Kola and his fiancé nodded.
"My son, I have longed for the day you would come and ask me to invest in your business idea.
"But today I will make the first move," the father said taking his cheque book from his drawer.
He wrote on the cheque then gave it to the fiancé.
"Here my son, this is a cheque of N5 million, not for your wedding, but as start up capital for a business of your choice.
"I am giving the cheque to your wife, because as Proverbs 31 said, she is to walk with you in building an empire for your family.
"Focus on your family, give your family the best; forget about the public and opinions of people who don't matter.
"Build a future for your family.
"Build your family on a foundation of surplus not debt."
"Thank you so much," said the fiancé.
Kola stood up with tears in his eyes.
His father stood up too.
The father and son hugged.
"Thank you dad for being a great figure and your counsel.
"I don't know what to say.
"You have challenged me not to merely get married but to have a vision, a vision for my family.
"I don't know what to say" he said.
The father held his shoulder, "You will make a great husband and father.
"I wish I had the same counsel when I was getting married, all those people I fed on my wedding day didn't add value to my marriage.
"In fact, if I was to organise an event and feed multitudes, I would do so for the less-fortunate and those in need.
"Marriage is not for show." May God give us the wisdom that we need to build a happy marriage.

Very thoughtful and insightful but most ladies these days love elaborate wedding without minding the cost

Magnoliaa:
June 55th...

Do you mean 25th or what?

[quote author=ikhileomotayo post=78973147]June 26th[/quote









Happy birthday in advance Omotayo

Emmxyl:
June, 3rd
Abakaliki.

That's today oo, pls lets celebrate our brother here. Wish him a happy birthday. You also send him gift too

Phenomenal16:
I rep 16th

Just a week from mine, happy birthday lady

blinkz4real:
June 6th.

Wow,that's on Thursday. Do you have any plan of celebrating or just marking it? Happy birthday in advance

virginboy90:
I rep June 18

Is virginboy still a virgin, lol? Happy birthday in advance big man

What to do w people who fake their identity and their personality?

What to do about people who fake their identity and their personality?

Phenomenal16:
All these men that will be pressing the stuff..like mango.. Smh.....

Don't mind them, they are the one that makes the mango over ripe and spoil on time

Preshy561:
Lol.

I too like money

Then work for the money and enjoy the money biko

phil0:
I don't really like the month even though it's my birth month, terrible things normally happen..... I rep June 8 though

Happy birthday in addy to you

phil0:
I don't really like the month even though it's my birth month, terrible things normally happen..... I rep June 8 though

Oh no that's terrible, am so sorry for that, but its always a sweet month for some peeps.

Oshin56:
Kwara state

Ok, all the members that are in lagos would celebrate their birthdays together

Oshin56:
June 4

Wow, happy birthday in advance bro, are you based in Lagos?

Happy new month to all everyone. If your birthday is in this cool month of June signify and let's celebrate ourselves.







Mine is June 22nd

goodnewscliff:
na wa ohhhh......dis topic got to me..... d guy is a sidechick

No the guy is an assistant boyfriend, if you know, you know

Hardheolar:
Can we just stop bashing the lady. It takes a brave lady to do such. I actually don't see anything wrong in a lady proposing to a guy the same way a guy propose to a lady. My problem with this proposal of a thing is why must we make it a thing of public.

Abi o, must it be made in the public where if he or she rejects, it becomes the talk of the world. Nothing bad in a lady proposing at all

Hmmmmm, upright boob and tight punany

MissRaine69:
If it’s presence is not there no amount of beating about the bush will change that fact....we both cannot have a clitoris.

Is your clits as big as that?

GraGra247:
How to know who suffers more heartbreak is by knowing who suffered more in a relationship.

1.Guys are rejected and humiliated several times by girls before finally accepted.

2. Guy will spend money calling several times even when he can't afford to eat.

3. Guy sends her recharge card several times and still she will flash afterwards.

4. Guy transport regularly to go visit her and also pay her transport, feeding and all if she will visit.

5. Guy buys expensive gifts always and give her.

6. During sex (if ever she agree) guy will be on top several hours suffering and sweating and at last still say thank you.

7. Guy will help her get job or open business.

8. Guy send money if she's sick.

9. Guy will fight anyone that harrasses her and help her if she's in trouble.


Chai!! Guys don suffer.

Hmmmmmmmm

SIR0:
Love is indeed a between thing, especially when a relationship is still very fresh. Most of us decide to address our relationship with the word 'courtship' in place of the generally used word 'relationship', all because you see the relationship going far beyond dating. Then you begin to address her as your fiancee & she also sees you as her fiance. A courtship is not always a bed of roses, so you are likely to face some challenges along the line and the two partners may decide to face them all with all their strength, in love & unity. The challenges may be as a result of individual differences, natures, backgrounds, negative feelings & external influences (like strange calls, chats, advice).
Back to the subject of this post, a fiancee starts to become a girlfriend when:
1. she loses interest in phoning/texting her fiance,

2. she asks his fiance to lower his guard on her as they are not married yet. This is a two-edged sword, if you know, you know.

Feel free to add yours

You are talking from experience bros, this happened to me recently

EVILFOREST:
It appears you are heavily affected.??
U can still FIX yourself

Sandrazima:
Stop using rare probabilities to support your argument. How many times have women committed abortion because the baby was threatening their live? Abortions are usually done disproportionately because women simply don't want to take on the responsibility of having children.

Don't mind the people supporting abortion with rare cases like rape and life threatening ones. What happens to the use of condoms and other preventive measures when you know you are not ready to parent a child. Just think about it, if these people supporting abortion were aborted by their mums will they be here supporting it?

........

AnalQueenluci:
Sorry dear ...nt u am talking 2 , Am a military health scientist from cross river in cam/amba military

Its ok, I understand. But, pls what's cam/amba?

AnalQueenluci:
Enjoy urself provoking me

Like seriously? Is the question provocative? Hmmmmmmm

AnalQueenluci:
A lot of myths have been spread about women in the military (Absurd) while some ignorant men believe they have been made rigid through the rigorous trainings they go through ,A big LIE though

These are some main reasons you should date an army lady rather than shallow brain mamas : -

,Emotional

Women in the military have been trained to be brave and courageous .They are by profession fighters who have been toughened by various phases of trainings ,however ,the trainings they have gone through haven't shielded them from the traumas accompained by love.

They embrace motherhood easily,


While so many people share an unreal belief about military women been wrecks when it comes to marital bliss ,some of them are married and they embrace motherhood with a shocking interest .
NB: They put everything they have into use to ensure their children live normal lives...GREAT.

They are supportive

Most people believe military women are mean and therefore avoid them. They could be excellent friends when people get to know them more. Same way they could be tough and intimidating ,they could also be fierce when it comes to fighting for their friends and their loved ones ~ this is what all guys want!

Physical beauty and sexual favours : -

Army ladies always look sexy(figure with a firm and well Cupped breast due to yoga-like trainings (yummy).
Not every woman in the military sleeps around ,some are virgins unlike slayqueens we see at lekki or VI , know it that most military ladies have dignity and have been able to maintain healthy non- sexual relationships with their superiors

Long live Army ladies gang(A.L.G)

Are you a military lady?

How real and true this be? because I am in need of a serious minded working class lady who resides in Lagos cause long distance relationship doesn't work for me.

Furiosa:
I know it's not a cow that gave birth to you.
Direct your questions to the woman you call mother.

SHM

Hmmmmmm