₦airaland Forum

Like I always say, you accept the baggage or swerve. No time!

Hello LS,
I need an advice because I feel stuck and I am tired of fighting.
I met Yaya (not real name) in my new place of work. He liked me and started flirting with me, eventually, we had s*x (which I wasn’t proud of because I know premarital s*x is wrong and not an ideal lifestyle for a true Christian and has been abstaining from it) and decided not to indulge in again.
As time went on, he told me he loves me but can’t date me right now because his life is in a mess(so many personal and family issues) which he didn’t divulge to me at the moment.

Yaya and I remained friends at work, went for lunch breaks together and always seen together( we are jokingly called couples)In the space of one month of being close to him, we eventually started dating and I found out a lot of things about him.
I learnt he lies a lot, and that he lied about his age, (he is 28, same age with me but he lied that he is 33 and his reason is that he didn’t want me to dump him because he is my age mate).

Yaya has an addiction for porn, masturbates,(which he is fighting)smokes weed,prefers a s*xual relationship,doesn’t go to church and I hate all of these.
I also found out he has such a good heart, he cant hurt a fly, infact he has the heart of a child. He forgives so easily and cant stand a quarrel, he would always want to talk to me first and make peace with you when we have a misunderstanding,even when I try to ignore him.


Yaya is equally very humble and smart,humane with a very good singing voice…. and all these good qualities I fell for, especially his heart.The problem is, I can’t stand his addictions and I have not been able to love him past his bad side(especially the smoking weed habit).
I have told him how I hated it and would want him to stop and he would promise to but he continues. I have preached and advised him but no avail, I have also stopped talking to him a couple of times because of it but he will always beg me to come back to his life as if his life depends on me and promise to change, which he never does( he is only deceiving me to see if I can accept him that way but I cant)
At a point, I even threatened to report him to his Father but it didn’t help. When I couldn’t stand it anymore, I reported to HR of the company about (though I didn’t mention names) some colleagues smoking within the company premises’
That made the company run random drug test which made Yaya stop smoking for a while and at work so he doesn’t test positive but he still does when he is not at work.I have been patient with him, praying and hoping he would change and become a better man for me but I am not seeing that yet.
He doesn’t want to quit smoking weed,(he doesn’t see anything wrong with it) not even for my sake and yet he professes he loves me so much and would want me to be the mother of his kids.
I love him and I hate him at same time, he is not the kind of man I prayed for(because of his bad sides),he has lured me into pre-marital s*x couple of times (which I regret after each act).
Sometimes when praying and asking God for forgiveness, I ask why He let our paths cross?
Why He let me love trapped with a person with a lifestyle I hate.
It’s not like I can’t break up with him and move on but it will be difficult because we share the same space at work, and he won’t stop trying to get me back which will make it obvious to other colleagues that I am ignoring him.
A friend suggested I ignore his smoking weed habit since he is faithful to me, not a drunkard and cares a lot about me, but what if he graduates to using drugs? I can’t accept a weed smoker as a husband or as the father of my children.
Please ma, how do I get out of this, it’s causing me great concern and it makes me cry, I wish God will bless me with the man of my desire.
I will be expecting your reply.

Things you should have done during upbringing

People and stupid mistakes... And she calls it "....just because"

OP the words "sack" and "1000" is enough to garner empathy. Which one come be "loyal staff" again? How have you measured their loyalty, considering you even know all of them which I doubt.

Digitiminimi:
Sir, not all requests are good. Example: Death penalty for Hate Speech is a no go area. Turn Back on that. We Nigerians don't want that. No one wants that. Thanks.

You get time o. The guy is drunk in misplaced loyalty.

I won't say more.

No content, just beating around.

Guy tell nobody nothing and stop picking her calls. let hell drop on everybody.

Wetin?

Nobody go blackmail me...

3rdavefarms:
You are the only one with reasonable question and I will help you out

To get the loan it’s so easy and all you need is bank statement of 12 months of your company that has already been registered with CAC

AND 2 guarantors

Thegoodone13...try what he just said and I guarantee you, that's just the beginning. You will come here and open another thread explaining to us. Go and give it a try!

If you know you know

kennosman:
if not legally married, no need for the Prayer then?

Oh!! you mean to say, you want to commit fornication but want to know whether to pray for forgiveness before the deed or afterwards? You for specify na....hahahahahaha

haba bros!

Johnson5258:
Money eligible candidate can access.

Na today?

Rosskiki:
NIGERIA: The construction of a rolling stock rail assembly plant at Kajola in Ogun state was launched when Vice-President Yemi Osinbanjo attended a groundbreaking ceremony on November 9.

https://d1c4d7gnm6as1q.cloudfront.net/Pictures/780xany/1/8/2/28182_nigerianrollingstockplantgroundbreakingceremony1_899513.jpg
Nigerian rolling stock plant groundbreaking ceremony

Minister of Transportation Chibuike Rotimi Amaechi said the plant on the Lagos – Ibadan railway would be the first of its kind in Nigeria.

It is to be used to assemble locomotives, coaches, wagons and diesel multiple-units for domestic use, as well as for export to other countries in West Africa.

The plant is being built under a March 2018 agreement between the Ministry of Transportation and the local subsidiary of China Civil Engineering Construction Corp.

The Chinese company selected the site for the plant, which it said would undertake production processes including welding, assembly, painting and testing, with a capacity of 500 vehicles per year.

https://d1c4d7gnm6as1q.cloudfront.net/Pictures/480xAny/1/8/4/28184_nigerianrollingstockplantgroundbreakingceremony2_984969.jpg
Nigerian rolling stock plant groundbreaking ceremony

The first batch of wagons to be built would be used for freight services on the 1 435 mm gauge Lagos — Ibadan and Abuja — Kaduna routes, with passenger vehicles to follow.

‘By linking our ports to rail lines and now, building the rolling stock locally, import and export business within and outside of Africa’s largest market will be completely transformed’, said Osinbanjo. He said a commitment to local recruitment ‘affirms the President’s directives on prioritising Nigerians and Nigerian businesses in the innovation, production and procurement of engineering projects.’

https://www.railwaygazette.com/business/construction-of-nigerian-rolling-stock-factory-begins/55094.article

Excellent and thanks for sharing.
I pray it's a success

Sad

Jabioro:
The life and the world itself was wicked to some..the spherical circle call planet was good to some and it was called favour while some suffered for what they knew nothing about and some enjoy what they didn't work for..May we be at right place always..

Well said

Lmfao

OP this kind of question should come from someone who's legally married. At least that's what many sane minds would assume.

No offense

No mind am...return you to where?

Let's invest similar interest in our rail transport system. Our roads are over stretched/used

Money nobody can access!

Mrop:
After the video of the Babcock university students went viral online, the video has since then being receiving attention on adult site, praizenews report.

According to a twitter user, the viral video is the most popular video people have being searching for on adult site.

However the student has been reportedly expelled from the school and some twitter users are against the school decision.

Watch The 18+ Video below



Cc lalasticlala Mynd44 Seun

And you're helping her by creating more thread?

How Are you different from the boyfriend?

Omonken:
ice block production business is been overlooked by many... but has proven to be second to oil and gas nusiness in terms of money.

Nice but seasonal

How have you come to love someone who doesn't communicate? Are you sure it's love because my understanding is that love is a two way traffic...

Your mind/heart strong sha

And you couldn't narrate this without mentioning your creator up and down abi? Continue...

Don't ask me why we won't win it!

Hope my comment doesn't qualify as hate speech?

maynation:
May God punish the whole world expecting more good souls.

buhahahahahahahahaha
now this really cracked me up

Jyde89:
na because of people like you that senator dey propose that mumu bill.

buhahahahaha you no go kee person aswear

drnoel:
No on the contrary, I left her. I allowed her those liberties cos I needed a live in person to take care of the house, only selfish reasons on my part. At that time I was hoping a girlfriend one could upgrade in the future would be the best line of action. Anyways when she showed her streaks I let her have her liberties till it was time to replace her. I just packed her stuffs and sent it to her workplace via a friend's taxi service with a note never to comeback to that house. Knowing she would, I changed the locks and keys and instructed the other tenants not to let her in.

That's the spirit...i'm sorry about the name calling

seankafor:
I'd u can't get it from the government, why not source other means to get the electricity you crave for?

I hate people that complain too much with little or no work to show for it

And you're an all seer

drnoel:
U are pathetic and have no sense of strength in the right sense of it. U are quick to insult and it shows ur weakness. Also I pity u if ur reference is that sad charlatan Ubunja who streaks of pure bitterness.

buhahahaha

That's why she left you because you channel your energy in the wrong direction.

Go and face her with same energy

Impressive... Meanwhile here we can't get simple things as stable electricity right.

Or is it hate speech?