₦airaland Forum

Hi there, I'm interested.

Ujuhot:
The most difficult time to be in a relationship as a guy is in your early twenties.The period when you are stuck in a limbo, trying to figure out yourself and who you want to be.

At this age, you find it a herculean task asking money from your parents, considering your dad will always remind you of how he was self sufficient at your age. So you are always left with "Nkechiyere" anyone that comes from them willingly. To compound your "woes". You have a girlfriend whom you love so much, you are 24 and she is 23. And guys being wired to want to take control, you are frustrated at your inability to take care of her like you want to.
I mean where is the money??
You are still jobless, still hustling, still finding your feet.
Still putting hands in to many things hoping for good. All of a sudden, she starts acting out and showing attitude. You call, and she takes forever to pick or return your calls. When she finally does pick, the call is like an interview session with those annoying and frustrating one word replies. Yes, no, fine, okay, nothing.

Then finally she ends the call with a flimsy excuse like " wait let me close the fridge", i will call you back. And the call never comes back. Then one day she calls you and asks you "where is this relationship heading to?.
You don't even know where your own life is heading to, not to talk of a relationship. Then she drops the bombshell. Tells you that she met a guy who wants to marry her. And how age isn't on her side, and you are almost compelled to scream "But you are just 23". Can't you wait 3 more years let me make it.
You just hold yourself and play the good guy. You ask her if she loves him, she dodges the question and replies you with " He treats me well". Well since she wasn't informing you to take permission, she was simply telling you.

You have to be the cool guy and wish her well. One week later, she gives you the traditional wedding card. And then you do the math yourself. She was talking to the guy a long time before now.

Then you realise that for every "K" you got on WhatsApp, the guy was getting a long epistle.
You have been played. Worse is you cant even blame her, you are just a prospect who no one knows what will become of your life in 4years time. Would you have made it or not? She has gone for the real deal, someone who has already made it.

In footballing terms, you are a "Anthony Martial" ( prospect) while the guy is a Messi ( has made it already). I mean you were sending her cards of N200, and the guy was telling her to manage 10k for the weekend. No comparison there.
And then you go through that silent heartbreak guys go through, the ones they don't talk about. And unceremoniously you get inducted into the special hall of fame where members are young guys whose childhood loves and friends or girlfriends they thought they would end up with left them to marry someone else. Your heart is broken into smithereens. In this hall of fame, you are all victims. Victims of not having found your path in your early twenties.
At the wedding, no sight is more heartbreaking than seeing "the love of your life" say "I do" to this guy she just met 6 months ago.
To make matters worse, you get an alert from Diamond bank telling you how N13 have been deducted for bank charges. You are mad.Your N4000, is down to N3987 rendering that N1k useless, you can only withdraw N3k now. And that's your home and abroad. Can life be more unfair at this moment?

6 years later. You are 30 now. Congratulations, you finally made it. You are as rich as you hoped you will become. You are one of the happening guys in town. You go to a wedding. With your friends, the men on suit. Those guys that just intimidate everyone in the hall. You are seated scouting the hall, and the bridal train passes by. Of course, bridal train and ashoebi ladies always show themselves. That's part of the job description. Sampling. And you spot one, she is beautiful, elegant and tall. You walk up to her, chat her up. Exchange numbers and you leave. She is 24, ripe for marriage. Three months later, you are sounding marriage to her ears. She loves how it sounds.

You are on chat with her always.
And somewhere else, a 25year old boy still finding his way is wondering why the girlfriend is becoming distant these days.
Why is he getting those one worded replies which is unlike her. Why do there chats seem more like interview. And fast fast, you have proposed and simultaneously she is asking the 25year old boy that question of
"Where is this relationship going to". And then you marry her, and somewhere a boy gets heart broken.

You see we are always going to do this to ourselves.

Written by @jaetomz


What goes around...

This piece almost brought tears to my eyes. Thanks. That was an emotional journey I wasn't ready for.

keishik:
Frankly, I'm not so keen on outsourcing any job here anymore. I had a horrid experience doing so just now. One of the reasons I feel gutted about this whole job going awry is because of my experience outsourcing or trying to outsource a job. But issorai.

Hi , I understand how you feel as not everyone can deliver what they promise. However, I can assure you that working with me will be a positive experience. I'll be anticipating.
Thanks.

keishik:
To think the number of jobs I shelved for this now floundering task! SMH

Hello there,
Do you still need writers to handle any of your projects?.
I can be of great help to you.

Pocahontas

enshi:
Nairaland.com is a forum for socio-economic, sport, fashion et. Cetera interactions... Yes people meet here for diverse reasons and yes people have married as a result of this. In same vain people have become life time enemies for same reason (their meeting here)..

Someone created a thread somedays ago about how broke guys treat their baes... But I thought Instead of creating a counter thread i should creat an identification thread for the very big girls on here...


1.. THEY DONT HAVE A PROFILE PIC

I tell you this group of girls are very concious of what the Public think about their reputation... Therefore they rather not risk having their images scattered or saved on the phones of many knowing fully well that they May never get to meet any of these people


2.. THEY ARE REAL WITH THEIR COMMENTS

these ladies comment, quote and respond to quotes just the exact way it is in their minds for instance for a post that asks "do you love anal sex??" if she does she says yes and leaves the thread.. This is because she loves anal sex... No pretence

3.. THEY DONT BASH... I MEAN THEY AVOID QUARRELS

when they air their views on matters and you are not satisfied about it then you try to argue it out with them, they Simply let the matter die.... They do so by replying epicly with words like THANKS, OK, NO PROBLEM, or most times with a full stop (.)

4.. THEY ACCEPT PMs

Yes surprisingly they accept PMs even if its from the opposite sex.... They can still go ahead to accept whatsapp adds but will not hesitate to block, delete or shun you when you cross ur boundaries...

5.. THEY ARE MOSTLY WORKING CLASS

6.. THEY MOSTLY DO NOT CREAT THREADS...

7.. THEIR PROFILES DONT HAVE INFOS LIKE LOCATION, YIM, SKYPE, TWITTER, ETC

8... THEY ARE MOSTLY ON THE FRONT PAGE...


9.. YOU CAN NEVER FIND THEM ON THE "MISS NAIRALAND" THREAD... unless ofcourse she is a mod or May be her business / work is fashion oriented
ADD URS THE LIST GOES ON

Bro I think your post is a bit narrow,nairaland is a forum where most people come to have fun without necessarily making any meaningful attachments. just because a girl creates a thread or posts her profile picture or even engage in a little bit of harmless "online" back and forth provides no idea of what her personality really is.
if everybody decides to follow this definition of matured, we'll end up with a boring forum. Variety is the spice of life .
Abeg make we all catch fun any how we like,life na one.

Good idea enshi... CC: Pristinemuscles

I'm interested.

Forget all these FBI advice.... trust the choices you make,if she messes up, then you made a bad call

To be a man, you've got to believe in yourself... make your self so valuable that she can't afford to lose you,and stop paying so much attention to her friends, if she's sleeping around, you'd be the last to know.

Typical ,girl has a crush on guy,guy doesn't seem to reciprocate .....guy must be gay.

TruthMustBeTold:
Hello, are you an avid writer? I mean can you write unique blog articles of 400 words every weekday(Mon-Fri) for a top blog in Canada? at a near native English level? If so then read on,,blog posts are on android and you will be given specific website to source your content from. Plagiarism isn't allowed as the client has already given me access to his copyscape account already. Blog posts are in two phases. The first 200 words blog post will be delivered in d morning while d second 200 words blog posts will be delivered in the afternoon US time. This is a long term job and the pay is $60. Send me a pm and i will reply u immediately. Thanks.

Hi,I just sent you a pm,awaiting your reply.

That's a girl?,damn.

He died doing what he loved....RIP brave one

enshi:
A year 3 months and some days.... Plus regular morning jogglings over 100 poles

Good work, amazing progress,I started a year ago myself.
the gains are therapeutic.

Hey bro,how long have you been lifting?

look at it from the Father's perspectives, your 16 year old daughter comes home late and on questioning her she tells you she was raped by an adult man.do you expect him to go shake hands with your friend?,I know I wouldn't.
your friend messed up,period. He needs to stay away from them !

Don't you just hate it when a woman messes up and starts talking about how women's right matters just to get sympathy.I love women but come on.....
GUESS WHAT? every body has rights!dammit!

Double standards,would you give your attention to ugly guys?
and why tag some as "unimportant?".... attraction isn't a choice, it just happens.

You look amazing ,pay no mind to the people saying you are ugly... you are not . you look better, healthier and happier, now hit the gym and add some muscle definition to your frame,if you can't subscribe to a gym(this is naija),try using body weight exercises.
you are used to being fat,lose that mentality and that posture and watch your confidence shoot through the roof. start by 30 push-ups a day and slowly progress to 100.
once again, Great job on the weight loss,people envy what they can't do.
BEST REGARDS.

This is "how to become her best friend".

fixed.

The link is broken

Dressing in camouflage is not wrong,impersonating an officer is.that being said,don't go arguing with a military man.....for your own safety.

Who says she's broke...do u know how much a lawyer costs?...