₦airaland Forum

Nihilist:
Old soldier no dey die. You carry the bloodline of countless warriors from ariaria. Your DNA will live on after you are deceased. And your words are already immortalised online. Go forth and cöpulate to your hearts content. You are undying

I want to say this, Fvck You Nihilist, and it's official

Nihilist:
Don't worry Your manhood will live on.

Hehehe. What's the guarantee?

nateevs:
Hollup! This was the prerequisite for £100.

And we are discussing Jamie Vardy in the same team, even though there is doubt on Mahrez.

Trust me it's not about being dishonourable. You haven't won. If you have, I pay you right away.

Jamie Vardy isn't prolific sir.

His output isn't abundant enough to suggest he is a prolific striker.

diggz:
This man don decide to latan no amount of preaching can help d third leg from committing sin tonight

As we don drive enter Uyo town, come dey chill for G-Park, na en Bimffo dey preach about AIDS so?

Work has eaten up all the time I've got in the world, I have lost touch with my social life, why can't I just make this count?

The best ride I have ever received was dished out by an efik woman, I want to relive those memories. If I give up the ghost in the process, please Diggz, make sure Cobham Express keeps delivering.

Airmark no even try threaten my man Simpledawg again.

We at Cobham Express go just drop decorum and beat you till your eye turn red.

Shey you no know say na from street we start before this hustle come show. Abi we resemble all these Lekki boys wey dem papa leave wealth for before they kpeme?

Bimffo:
AIDs is real.

And so is Durex bro.

Hehehe. Diggz have you tasted an Ibibio punny before?

I am having one for dinner.

Say NO to TV games. Go to the stadium, celebrate with a chick, tap her asss and take her home.

diggz:
Griffon you have a mail sir

Attend to my mail HR. I am spending the night in Uyo.

I just tapped that asss for the third time, and the chick just smiled to that!

Moses the man!

diggz:
Omo African football dey pepper person for eye

Only on TV. I dey enjoy myself in Uyo like this.

Two goals, two celebrations, two deliberate tapping of a lovely asss before me.

That Zappacosta better come good.

Two late signings, not bad.

Oasis007:


Someone created 41 Chances, and only 5 were converted?! For the whole Season, he scored just a Goal despite being a Free-Kick Specialist?!

LMAO!

I guess analysis isn't really your turn.

Are you supposed to be blaming Zappa for his team-mates profligacy or the man for the poor chances created?

21m got us a player with 74 Clearances, 38 Interceptions, 41 Chances Created, 48 Crosses, 5 Assists and 1 Goal last season.

On paper, he is a beast, just like his unshaved beards suggests.

diggz:
Just got back from my YouTube waka.....the major positive about him is that he puts a lot of balls into the box which actually meets the target. If you check the number of times moses uses the ball to stamp the opponent you will actually not mind having Zappa around. Especially now that we have a striker who can only score with his heads

48 crosses, 4 assists!

This might turn out to be decent business.

Nihilist:
Zappacosta is literally the best right back I've ever seen play.

Amazing player, quick , strong, good tackler and crosser.

Better than Kyle Walker and Valencia combined.

Quote me to chat shït and watch thunder strike your blokos with alacrity.

How good is this nigga?

My younger brah just showed me a pic of the Italian then asked me why we're settling for a ninja that looks like he works for Al Qaeda.

Elnino4ladies:
stop giving me false hope oh

My source works in Cobham, not our Express Delivery company but Cobham Chelsea.

Mahrez is coming and so is Drinkwater.

f you are a religious person, pray to whatever you worship.

diggz:
It will shock u

They will bring in two faces, that I am sure.

Mahrez and Drinkwater I think.

It's all pointing towards Mahrez. Looks like we have had a bid of 45m accepted by Leicester for the winger.

Coming in is the report that Chelsea has also made a fresh £30m bid for Drinkwater.

Wetin Leicester do us?

Greatihex:
and they said he is beta than hazard bt he cnt dislodge a 30+ Amf frm the position. Mtcheew

Sir Bobby Ibime, Please confirm the receipt of this mail.

Cobham Express - Dedicated To Serve.

Nihilist:
That's why we said you should scan the archives.

Griffon you need to fire this man for dereliction of duty.

Scan the archives and locate the owner of that contemptuous mail, post haste...

Dear Mr Nihilist,

Thank you for bringing our attention to Order #125. We apologize for shipping the wrong item to the wrong man and acknowledge the mistake. We are shipping out the exact order per exact specifications. It should arrive no later than the next 10 mins.

Thank you for your feedback and again, we apologize for the error.

Sincerely,

Griffon Ortega Shakitibobo
Cobham Express Delivery

eph12:
Buahahaha

I no envy una job aswear. And I be don submit CV before o. Abeg help me find my CV destroy am before your boss begin shortlist names

Dear Eph12,

It is with great pleasure that I am writing to you to offer you the position of North-Site Delivery Man with Cobham Express Delivery. This entails that you will operate here in Manchester and within the north.

Your experience, enthusiasm and sound knowledge of this territory will be an asset to our company.

The starting salary is £50,000 per year and is paid on a weekly basis.

Full family medical coverage will be provided through our company's employee benefit plan and will be effective on September 1. If glaucoma or mouth odour is your case, you don't have to worry, dental and optical insurance are available.

Cobham Express offers a flexible paid-time off plan which includes vacation, personal and sick leave.

If you choose to accept this job offer, please sign the second copy of this letter and return it to us at your earliest convenience. When your acknowledgment is received, we will send you employee benefit enrollment forms and an employee handbook which details our benefit plans and retirement plan.

We look forward to welcoming you as part of the Cobham Express Team!

Regards,
Diggz Obanikoro Lulu Fadiga
Human Resources Director
Cobham Express Delivery.

How come we are chasing Mahrez?

I thought the idea was to work with 4 wingers this term?

After extensive talks, we have agreed to sell Costa to A'Madrid.

Still can't believe I've got the name Oxlade Chamberlain in a Chelsea related talk.

This is a steal people.

Ibime:
For those league cup games etc, Kenedy, Oxlade or Moses can be the winger, not to mention playing both strikers instead, or a diamond midfield. Loan is best for Boga while Musonda eats all those minutes.

I wish him luck at Birmingham then under the great white Harry!

diggz:
Funny enuff airmark, danilo ain't looking bad in that city's team at the moment and if not for bad luck, he would hv registered 2goals to his name already.

Griffon is looking right on this one tho!

Cobham Express have got no room for YouTube analysts, you should know better hombre

Ibime:
Musonda is first in line. Boga loan is sensible, otherwise he will be the 5th winger.

Hazard, Pedro, Willian, Musonda and Boga looks pretty much like a good mix for a team competing in four different competitions.

I am looking at our numbers and the dampening effect it may have on our performance as the season wears on.

Xlpacks:

You don't expect him to start in the UCL or even against any of the title contenders.

What's the rationale behind the decision to send Boga out on loan?

There are FA Cup, Capital One and couple of EPL dead rubber games that boy could have featured.

Chambo's acquisition doesn't double us up numerically, so why are we still depleting the squad?

28 chaps out on loan already! What are those fellas sniffing in that glass house?

nateevs:
You still think he will flop in the EPL? If I have £80m, I buy him. End of!

Not after you must have signed a £58m Morata, the new focal point of the team.

Unless you are PSG, it's almost crazy to spend nearly £150m on one position.

We could have bitten the bullet and gone for Belotti though, but then again, we have Morata now and he doesn't look like he is going to do a Torres.