@gigitte
No one said your observations aren't valid. just stating a fact as a Hausa person, the fact that you have interracted with them doesn't mean you know everything there is to know. bear in mind your observations are as an outsider, there is only so much you will know

If you're not a muslim Hausa, you're unlikely to get along with another Hausa

Not true, as long as you respect their religion and their beliefs.

I cant believe the posts i have just read! for real? i am half hausa and half yoruba an idea mix. i grew up in the north and so speak hausa fluently but my yoruba is not too bad (i think) but its interesting reading the myths about hausa people. they are just like any other tribe and not all are muslims I am a christian.
So ask your questions, I am sure I am qualified to answer them.

Comeon, you really didn't expect him to stay did you? lol
never mind, plenty of fish in the river (just make sure he is single though!)

@idiot, i like that
@Chatter box, i feel what you mean

Goodluck. i would suggest changing your number though. it helps when there is no contact at all. been there before. thing is when u eventually get yourself together, you will find someone worthy of you probably sooner than you think. also hook up with your close girl friends and hang out. trust me it does wonders and takes your mind off things.
let us know how you get on.

i think working girls have other preoccupations than just hanging around clubs and parties. As a working girl myself, its not about the clubs or parties, its about the quality of entertainment,mental stimulation or networking one can achieve that apeals most. mindless clubbing and partying are things i did in my teenage years. so why carry on doing it? Dont get me wrong, i attend parties and go to clubs but its always where like minded individuals would be.

I think he has a hidden agenda......since u hate his guts, i think you should walk it girl! of course you are allowed to b civil...erm only when it suits you.

Now my question, what do I do? is it proper to insult a lady after sleeping with her?

Nope, its a very immature thing to do. if its any consolation....he was just hurt and in his tiny mind he felt that by belittling something which would have been special and intimate between you two, he was getting back at you.

So move on, i am sure there are more men out there with some decency.
Good luck!

what are they called ?
Fantsuam Foundation- www.fantsuam.com

what do they do?
They work with rural communities in southern kaduna, women in particular

how do they help u with accomodation,
They would be able to provided you are being sponsored

how many volunteer can they accept at once?
it depends on what projects they have at the time you apply

do they help with travel n all that?
unfortunately no, you will need to sort that out yourself.
they are a charity so their volunteers are self sponsored or have sponsors.
By volunteering, you are taking on the costs.
The monetary rewards are not great, its more the satisfaction of being able to make a contribution and give something back to the society. So if thats what you are interested in, then do contact them. if not, perhaps other organisations may be able to help.
Best wishes

and no you dont need a degree...just a willingness to share what knowledge you have and learn.

@Seun, yes you can opt for the programme and still work in your own company. you just volunteer your spare time and work with the NGO.Its based in Kaduna state and they have volunteers from all over the world. so its a case of getting in touch and discussing what skills you have.

@loverbwoy...lafiya.
I think you misunderstood. i didn't attend NYSC, and dont intend to. I found out about the NGO when i got to the UK whilst doing some research for my dissertation, their work helped me with my dissertation and so i decided to work with them as a volunteer and still do. I work with them from the UK.

I have heard so many conflicting statements about NYSC mostly discouraging but i am glad to say I didn't bother with it. Instead I spent the year working for an NGO in Nigeria .Not only does it look good on my cv and i can account for a missing year professionally, but i learnt alot too.
My experience with the NGO, i think certainly took me away from my comfort zone ( i hear NYSC does that too)
I still work with the NGO and its opened so many doors i would never have thought. So if you fancy a stint with an NGO instead of NYSC, i would be very happy to share my experience.

jeje ni mo joko to wa ri ibi oh!- someon translate please?

Back to the topic at hand- Darn! this would make some Jerry springer show!!!
i think you need to hear what ur sis has to say but in the mean time i hope you are not still seeing this sorry excuse of a man! He's not worth the shirt on his back. Your sis did overreact. make your peace with her.Life is short...and nope you are not to blame not unless you knew he had a thing with ur sis.

Bad boys are the ones you parents warn you about....and bad boys represent our defiance of the accepted norm- its almost like there is a power that comes with the deviance- women like that power or the idea of it...just my opinion...i think gentlemen are the way forward personally with a hint of that danger women crave!

In my opinion, Not possible, you could be in love with one and be duluded that you feel the same about the other, or simply in love with one and in lust with the other!

erm...@terdoo....i think that is a rather juvenile way of telling if a lady likes you! I would like to think that men out there do not practice this. Not only is it not mature and would more than likely ensure you loose the lady, but also the most ridiculous thing one could do!
Stick to something simple and easy- Ask her. it saves both parties all the mind boggling scenarios you have just mentioned!
Best wishes in trying the way i suggested, its more likely to yield results.

its certainly a very personal decision. I have been contemplating the same question but where do you think you feel the happiest? then write down the pros and cons...(of course include financial stuff and work) that would help. As touch feely as it may sound, where does your heart feel at home?

"Real Men not crying" oh puleeeez!
Can anyone tell me what the defination of a real man is? or is it just accepted that a "himbo" is the societal defination of a real man.
My defination, i prefer not to use "real" but "good"
A good man cooks, he cleans and he changes diapers oh.... and he cries- its called being human and its also called being responsible.
Crying shouldn't be seen as a sign of weakness when a man does it but it should be seen as dignified.

Love aint that blind trust me! it wears bifocal lenses to ensure it sees what is approaching

well in this day and age i dont think there is any need for subtle signals etc... since its much harder than rocket science lets save the men some time ladies and just spell it out! because honestly some wouldn't even know if it hit them between the eyes!

I like Seun's analysis but if you are observant enough, its not rocket science to know if a girl fancies you or not!

I think he still has feelings for her. otherwise why else would he entertain her phone calls etc? you either enjoy the fact that she is still running after you and the attention you get from her or you are too scared to tell her to back off! ever considered dating someone else just to show her you have moved on?.....or have you.....