₦airaland Forum

[quote author=maxwello.yg]*laughs in English* this man be sharp guy. but, does he actually think Obama will help him very much if he isn't an illuminati member ? *just asking*[/quote]You are funny sha , what you think illuminati is ?

Please read if you eat shrimps - Very Educative:
A woman suddenly died unexpectedly with signs of bleeding from
her ears, nose, mouth & eyes.
After a preliminary autopsy it was diagnosed that death was due to
arsenic poisoning.
Where did the arsenic come from?
The police launched an in-depth and extensive investigation. A
medical school professor was invited to come to solve the case.
The professor carefully looked at the contents. In less than half an
hour, the mystery was solved.
The professor said: 'The deceased did not commit suicide and
neither was she murdered, she died of accidental death due to
ignorance!'
Everyone was puzzled, why accidental death?
The professor said: 'The arsenic was produced in the stomach of the
deceased.' The deceased used to take 'Vitamin C' everyday, which in
itself is not a problem.
The problem was that she ate a large portion of shrimp/prawn
during dinner. Eating shrimp/prawn is not the problem that's why
nothing happened to her family even though they had the same
shrimp/prawn. However at the same time the deceased also took
'vitamin C', that is where the problem was!
Researchers at the University of Chicago in the United States , found
through experiments, food such as soft-shell contain much higher
concentration of five
potassium arsenic compounds.
Such fresh food by itself has no toxic effects on the human body.
However, in taking 'vitamin C', chemical reaction occurs and the
original non-toxic elements change to toxic elements.
Arsenic poisoning has magma role and can cause paralysis to the
small blood vessels. Therefore, a person who dies of arsenic
poisoning will show signs of bleeding from the ears, nose, mouth &
eyes. Thus as a precautionary measure,
DO NOT eat shrimp/prawn when taking 'vitamin C'.
After reading this; please do not be stingy.
Its our duty to take care of our friends
Re-share to your friends.and family's..
spicy girl

BEST Friends community (fb page)

Alarmingly, the Nigeria market has recently been invaded with a
Swedish-made sex doll widely condemned and described as a sign
of end and the return of Sodom and Gomorrah by critics. With a
succulent skin texture equated to 99.8% of human’s body, the
silicone made sex doll is said to serve as alternative to sexual
intercourse with woman as it possesses all sexual attributes of a
woman.
The newly invented sex product according it’s investors possesses
the under listed qualities and advantages.This would be the best $
6000 you’d ever spend. It will last two years if used constantly and
consistently every day. Completely adjustable to any position you
want.There are 100 sensors spread around the body. There are 30
sensors on the private parts. Each sensor makes her move in a
specific way, up to 20 positions.
On penetration she emits a light gentle sound that echoes gently in
your ears.
Comes with inbuilt sound in the throat and recognizes up to 16
commands that are extremely personal up to two meters away
from her ears.
When there is any type of pulsation sensed in her private parts she
emits light moans of stimulation.
Above all that she gets wet with a slight touch over any of the
sensors.
Most important, she has a voice password, which should be
protected from disclosure.
Principal characteristics :
She does not speak
She does not get fat
She never has periods
She does not pass gas
She never goes shopping
She does not get pregnant
She does not have a mother
She never ever gets headaches
She does not go to the hairdresser
She does not watch soaps or Oprah
She does not care what we watch on TV
She does not frequent internet chat rooms
She will never get elderly human physical attributes
She will not get jealous if you bring home another woman
She will not nag if you go out and she won’t care
when you return.
Speaking with DailyPost, a woman identified as Mrs. Olawale said: “I
wonder what Technology is turning the world into. Even when my
husband saw it on the internet, he developed interest in the thing.
My fear now is that if by chances he gets it, that might be end of our
marriage.” She said sadly.
Another Mrs. Emenike said it’s none of her business. Her words, “I
know my husband would definitely go for it, because he doesn’t
have my time, but it’s none of my business, I know life would still
go on.” - Daily Post.
twitter handle @janecoolfm

koonbey: Hmmmn,that is so nice,and its so relevant to Nairaland ‎​Щњεяέ everybody wants to make front page...and this age of Blogging.. Kudos.

BTW,I think this post should make front page...

Thanks bros, i appreciate your commendation, you have just encouraged me to write more. God bless you

The three R's of Recognition
(The complete post)

To crave for recognition means you want to be great, or you want to move from your present state. But to be able to get recognized you must adhere to a particular principle, i call it "The three R's of recognition.

(1) Relevance:This the act of being connected to the matter and issue at hand, it is your relationship with the issue at hand.
I will tell you a short story about a man who is a mechanic of Citreon cars back in the 70's, this man was very good at what he does, almost everybody patronized in the city him . He has a big workshop with so many apprentice, this a man anybody even a blind man will label "A busy man". So he became rich and very relevant in the city, you would'nt own a Citreon car without visiting his shop, even my father did. As time goes by they gradually started phasing off Citreon cars, this results to disaster to the man . The Citreon cars that was in vogue then became outdated with time. Then the man who was a very busy man back then, was rendered useless, all his apprentice started disappearing one after the other . He lost virtually all of his customers because customers upgrade their cars. Because he has failed to improve on himself, he lost everything including his workshop . He hereby has no other choice than to pack his bagages back to the village because he has lost his relevance in the city.
Where ever or what position you are in life, be it in a firm, establishment, family or government let your relevance be strongly felt, infant improve on yourself to the extent that you will make the people around you belief that they can't do without you. I have someone today who works in a petroleum firm part time and they pay him the same salary as those who works full time in the same firm .
When you are relevant, there is a greater opportunity that you will be recognized.

Reliability: The English dictionary defines it as to be trusted, or to be dependable in terms of need. This is one of the vital ways to gain recognition, making them feel like you are a place of refuge in terms of need, i.e you are to be trusted in whatever task or not falling short expectations from you .
A person that cannot be trusted or not reliable are forgotten so easily with time and they are made useless in a long run, never forget this say " any worth doing is worth doing well" i.e if it is worth doing at all it deserves to be done well.
Nobody will recognize Jesus Christ if He is not reliable in terms of people's needs, reliability is also what is keeping most brand owner's in business because people can rely on their goods for reason bought. Sincerely you draw more attention and get recognized when people finds you reliable.

Responsible: means you exercise to do things within your capacity without being told to do It being responsible is also the ability of being responsive to call or duty. This statement above is self explanatory and it is a vital source for gaining recognition. You are not told before you do something within your capacity this is a wise way to gain people's trust and attention, this will make them also dance to whatever tune you are playing. Being responsible takes a lot of discipline and cautions to attain it. Responsibility is one of the major reason Christ reigned and still continues to reign on earth, when He was on earth, He was never told to carry out actions that was within is capacity. He did them all with diligence and truth, it requires for you to be solely responsible to attain greatness and recognition. An irresponsible man has no say in any institution, the bible also further more tells us that " a man who cannot provide for his family is worst than an infidel" .
Note : This three R's of recognition are measured by what you do for other people.

The Lord want's us to be recognised by the world, this was why He described us as "a hill set in a city cannot be hidden". Remember He is the vine and we are the branches, and the branches are the beauty, and the glory of a plant and it can never be hidden in a plant .
So my brother and sister's in Christ come out of your present state of comfort and get recognized as a royal ambassadors for Christ.

The three R's of Recognition
(The complete post)

To crave for recognition means you want to be great, or you want to move from your present state. But to be able to get recognized you must adhere to a particular principle, i call it "The three R's of recognition.

(1) Relevance:This the act of being connected to the matter and issue at hand, it is your relationship with the issue at hand.
I will tell you a short story about a man who is a mechanic of Citreon cars back in the 70's, this man was very good at what he does, almost everybody patronized in the city him . He has a big workshop with so many apprentice, this a man anybody even a blind man will label "A busy man". So he became rich and very relevant in the city, you would'nt own a Citreon car without visiting his shop, even my father did. As time goes by they gradually started phasing off Citreon cars, this results to disaster to the man . The Citreon cars that was in vogue then became outdated with time. Then the man who was a very busy man back then, was rendered useless, all his apprentice started disappearing one after the other . He lost virtually all of his customers because customers upgrade their cars. Because he has failed to improve on himself, he lost everything including his workshop . He hereby has no other choice than to pack his bagages back to the village because he has lost his relevance in the city.
Where ever or what position you are in life, be it in a firm, establishment, family or government let your relevance be strongly felt, infant improve on yourself to the extent that you will make the people around you belief that they can't do without you. I have someone today who works in a petroleum firm part time and they pay him the same salary as those who works full time in the same firm .
When you are relevant, there is a greater opportunity that you will be recognized.

Reliability: The English dictionary defines it as to be trusted, or to be dependable in terms of need. This is one of the vital ways to gain recognition, making them feel like you are a place of refuge in terms of need, i.e you are to be trusted in whatever task or not falling short expectations from you .
A person that cannot be trusted or not reliable are forgotten so easily with time and they are made useless in a long run, never forget this say " any worth doing is worth doing well" i.e if it is worth doing at all it deserves to be done well.
Nobody will recognize Jesus Christ if He is not reliable in terms of people's needs, reliability is also what is keeping most brand owner's in business because people can rely on their goods for reason bought. Sincerely you draw more attention and get recognized when people finds you reliable.

Responsible: means you exercise to do things within your capacity without being told to do It being responsible is also the ability of being responsive to call or duty. This statement above is self explanatory and it is a vital source for gaining recognition. You are not told before you do something within your capacity this is a wise way to gain people's trust and attention, this will make them also dance to whatever tune you are playing. Being responsible takes a lot of discipline and cautions to attain it. Responsibility is one of the major reason Christ reigned and still continues to reign on earth, when He was on earth, He was never told to carry out actions that was within is capacity. He did them all with diligence and truth, it requires for you to be solely responsible to attain greatness and recognition. An irresponsible man has no say in any institution, the bible also further more tells us that " a man who cannot provide for his family is worst than an infidel" .
Note : This three R's of recognition are measured by what you do for other people.

The Lord want's us to be recognised by the world, this was why He described us as "a hill set in a city cannot be hidden". Remember He is the vine and we are the branches, and the branches are the beauty, and the glory of a plant and it can never be hidden in a plant .
So my brother and sister's in Christ come out of your present state of comfort and get recognized as a royal ambassadors for Christ.

ghettodreamz: Who go read all these ? semid4lyfe....summary please?

"you wona hid a secret from a black man, write it in a book"

That quote is meant for people like you not black people .

I admire a certain priest, i admired him a lot because he did something worthy of emulation.
Here is what he did....
The priest drives a humble volkswagen beetle car happily, then one day, a certain member of his church drove in with a nice saloon car to his house. Before the priest knows what was happening the church member gave the car keys to the saloon car and say " sir this is ur new car, we don't want you driving that old saloon car anymore", and the man priest replied shaking his head and saying " son i'm contented with the car i drive, it serves the purpose i bought, thank you for the new car but i won't accept it. There are a lot people hungry out there, people who can hardly boost of a meal a day, people who can hardly take care of their welfare , pls take this car sell it then take the money and share among this people. I'm sure my heavenly Father will bless you more by doing this".
My question is how many pastors or priest can do this ?

This preachers also turn our young men into lazy dreamers, thinking and hoping through fake faith that manner will fall from heaven to them without them working or engaging into something that will fetch them returns. You can imagine a young man brain washed by one the preachers telling me that he does'nt have to save money to get a capital to establish his a biz, that he has faith the money will come, guess what till today the biz exist only in his speech.
Faith without work is void.

The three R's of Recognition

To crave for recognition means you want to be great, or you want to move from your present state. But to be able to get recognized you must adhere to a particular principle, i call it "The three R's of recognition.

(1) Relevance:This the act of being connected to the matter and issue at hand, it is your relationship with the issue at hand.
I will tell you a short story about a man who is a mechanic of Citreon cars back in the 70's, this man was very good at what he does, almost everybody patronized in the city him . He has a big workshop with so many apprentice, this a man anybody even a blind man will label "A busy man". So he became rich and very relevant in the city, you would'nt own a Citreon car without visiting his shop, even my father did. As time goes by they gradually started phasing off Citreon cars, this results to disaster to the man . The Citreon cars that was in vogue then became outdated with time. Then the man who was a very busy man back then, was rendered useless, all his apprentice started disappearing one after the other . He lost virtually all of his customers because customers upgrade their cars. Because he has failed to improve on himself, he lost everything including his workshop . He hereby has no other choice than to pack his bagages back to the village because he has lost his relevance in the city.
Where ever or what position you are in life, be it in a firm, establishment, family or government let your relevance be strongly felt, infant improve on yourself to the extent that you will make the people around you belief that they can't do without you. I have someone today who works in a petroleum firm part time and they pay him the same salary as those who works full time in the same firm .
When you are relevant, there is a greater opportunity that you will be recognized.

I will conclude this write up in my next post, this includes the remaining two R's .
Watch out !

The three R's of Recognition

To crave for recognition means you want to be great, or you want to move from your present state. But to be able to get recognized you must adhere to a particular principle, i call it "The three R's of recognition.

(1) Relevance:This the act of being connected to the matter and issue at hand, it is your relationship with the issue at hand.
I will tell you a short story about a man who is a mechanic of Citreon cars back in the 70's, this man was very good at what he does, almost everybody patronized in the city him . He has a big workshop with so many apprentice, this a man anybody even a blind man will label "A busy man". So he became rich and very relevant in the city, you would'nt own a Citreon car without visiting his shop, even my father did. As time goes by they gradually started phasing off Citreon cars, this results to disaster to the man . The Citreon cars that was in vogue then became outdated with time. Then the man who was a very busy man back then, was rendered useless, all his apprentice started disappearing one after the other . He lost virtually all of his customers because customers upgrade their cars. Because he has failed to improve on himself, he lost everything including his workshop . He hereby has no other choice than to pack his bagages back to the village because he has lost his relevance in the city.
Where ever or what position you are in life, be it in a firm, establishment, family or government let your relevance be strongly felt, infant improve on yourself to the extent that you will make the people around you belief that they can't do without you. I have someone today who works in a petroleum firm part time and they pay him the same salary as those who works full time in the same firm .
When you are relevant, there is a greater opportunity that you will be recognized.

I will conclude this write up in my next post, this includes the remaining two R's .
Watch out !

SELFWORTH: No! But I think you his followers do.

Its your problem not mine! I am merely expressing my God given opinion which I am allowed to do .

How is what you are saying God given ? We Africans mix our cultural believes with religion, where is it said in the bible styling your God given hair to suit you is wrong. Even a new born has curls, will you call that a sin from heaven, it is the harsh nature we are subject to face that changes our hair to be though and strong .

SELFWORTH: Also Famously known as "Jerry Curls " pastors!

And so what ? You gat a problem with that ?

Must we wait for the FG to produce them for us, Nigerian barkers and investors should see this as a gold mine.

Jellita: Meaning. . .their fingers may be tiny. . .but their grips are as strong like when death grabs your azze.
MEANING NO ESCAPE!

Them go win you for arm wrestling. . . AMAZING POWER THEY HAVE IN THOSE FINGERS I TELLYA!

Thanks for asking for 'clarifications'. . . not many can understand my post AT FIRST READING!

*opportunity to show of my well-shellacked' natural nails!

What re you feeling like mcheeeeeeeew.

The fat in his system might narrowed the blood arteries in his heart, so as he exercises it makes the blood flows with greater speed nd force with the fat blocking the pathway of the blood this causes burst of the artery.

To be sincere the best is the yoruba ethnic, the are very accomodative and tolerant . If it were the Igbo's who owns Lagos i'm sure they would'nt allow other tribes populate it this way, as a yoruba man try live or school in the eastern part you will understand what i'm saying.

you resemble omobaba the comedian

A man who was
looking for a job? He noticed there was an
opening at the local zoo. Upon inquiry, he
discovered the zoo had a very unusual
position that they wanted to fill. Apparently
their gorilla had died, and until they could get a new one, they
needed someone to
dress up in a gorilla suit and act like a gorilla
for a few days. He was to just sit, eat, and
sleep. Of course, his identity would be kept a
secret, and no one would be the wiser,
thanks to a very fine gorilla suit. The zoo offered good pay for this
job, so the man
decided to do it. He tried on the suit and
sure enough, he looked just like a gorilla.
They led him to the cage; he took a position
at the back of the cage and pretended to
sleep. But after a while, he got tired of sitting so he walked around a
little bit, jumped up
and down and tried a few gorilla noises. The
people watching him seemed to really like
that. When he would move or jump around,
they would clap and cheer and throw him
peanuts. And the man loved peanuts. So he jumped around some
more and tried
climbing a tree. That seemed to really get the
crowd excited. They threw more peanuts.
Playing to the crowd, he grabbed a vine and
swung from one side of the cage to the
other. The people loved it and threw more peanuts. "Wow! This is
great," he thought.
He swung higher and the crowd grew
bigger. He continued to swing on the vine,
getting higher and higher and then all Last,
all of a sudden, the vine broke! He swung up
and out of the cage, landing in the lion's cage that was next door. He
panicked.
There was a huge lion not twenty feet away,
and it looked very hungry. So the man in the
gorilla suit started jumping up and down,
screaming and yelling, "Help, help! Get me
out of here! I'm not really a gorilla! I'm a man in a gorilla suit! HELP!"
The lion quickly
pounced on the man, held him down and
said, OKECHUKWU NO FEAR, NA ME
CHIJIOKE "be quiet! You're going to make
both of us loose our job

I once mention it in an international chatting blog, that a some regions in Africa eat dogs, to my surprise many laughed so hard and it shocked some that they ve to ban me from the group.

Emphasis on Psalm 23
There is something about this Psalm 23 that tells us that truly David is a man of strong faith in God...

The Lord is my shepherd
I shall not want
(The writer recognized the fact that God is His provider and has this very strong assurance that he would'nt lack ).

"He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.
( King David is saying here that the Lord has blessed and provided him with a bountiful harvest)

He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake.
( The devil the prince of this world has taken possession of so many souls till date but David acclaimed and know's that the Lord has taken charge of his soul by restoring it).

"Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.
(David knew at this time he is passing through a difficult times but in all he is more than a conqueror through God. The success we achieve after a difficult trial makes us a better Christian)

Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.
( wow this is powerful, this the best prayer we should always be praying for our enemies. The writer knew even though he had alot enemies but the Lord lifted him in their presence and enlarged his coast).

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the LORD for ever.
(David also has a this great confident that he said "surely" he did'nt just said goodness and mercy shall follow him but he knew for sure they will follow him. And he ended it by saying he will dwell in the house of the Lord forever meaning " he will never leave God's presence".

But David could have decided not to serve the Lord because he has all the comfort and riches of this world, but he was wise, he never failed to recognise God.

Oh political stealing has become a normal phenomenon in this country
" The labour of our heroes past are all in vain now" May God helps us .

These are future Micheal peps

Can ur R2flies fill up a capacity in Nigeria ?

PetroDolla: Look, the two countries have a long history when it comes to music. Ghana music dominated the scene for most of the 1960s and 70s. Go ask your papa and mama dem. Go and do your research and you'll see the big impact Ghanaian music had of nigerian music during that period. So my point is that even if some of you think nigerian music is making waves at this time it is just a phase. So why get worked up and try to put down other people?

It still does not change the fact that I listen to only Ghanaian music and watch mostly Ghanaian movies-Agya Koo. Just as when it comes to football, I support only two teams- Accra Hearts of Oak and the Mighty Black Stars. I am not into Chelsea, Man U, Barcelona stuff. I am just Ghanaian in every sense of the word!

Still dwelling on past glory, wakeup man it's the 21st century.

8:52am
The on going road expansion at Ikorodu road Lagos is going
pretty fine, quick and smoothly, we have to give credit to CCECC
construction company for a job well done and not also forgetting
the federal government and Lagos state government for giving them the opportunity to serve.
If construction and development can continue like the way the
company is carrying out this project, Nigeria would have gone
farther by now.

Jutresbien: The answer is clear. Jesus is 'firstborn of all creation'-Col 1:15. He existed as a spirit creature in heaven long before Abraham was born.

God is the I am that I am, now Jesus telling the pharise and the people of Jew "before Abraham I am" got them so mad, He was suppose to say before Abraham i was. It was not because He existed before Abraham that got them mad, it because He called Himself "I Am" meaning God.