₦airaland Forum

chaircover:
Are we all missing something here.

Women have been indirectly proposing to men for centuries (according to Nollywood anyway)

What do you think she is doing when comes over to your house, cooks you a good meal, puts on her shortest nightie, lies down in bed and the moment you try to touch her she says you cant do that until you pay her brideprice!

What do you think she is doing when she directly or indirectly asks you what are you doing with her and what are your plans for her?

What do you think she is doing when she travels miles just to go and "greet" to your mum or other important powerful ladies in your family? (note I said ladies cos they are the ones who really have the power to give a Nay or Yea verdict on a girl their son/brother/cousin is currently dating.

In reality how many men get on one knee during afternoon tea at the Ritz & with an engagement ring hidden in the cream cake

My thoughts exactly, as for me nothing wrong in that, I actually asked my hubby out on a date first time we met. I was 22 and not desperate but I really like him. Did all my investigation about him and I knew in my heart he was the one so why waste my time, He was 27 then, I walked up to him and asked him to give me a min of his time, funny enough, he asked me to stop once we got outside and asked me out before I completed my sentence. We got married 2 year after. It been 10 yrs and 2 beautiful boys now since we met and I still confirm I was right to ahve made my move.

So ladies u see what u like, u go for it, why waste time feeling like u can't talk when u know what u want.

I think he is just playing on ur feelings for him. If he did care about u, he would have called u before now. If u keep going over to his place, u know he will continue to use u until he no longer needs you around. Its a shame that some people act like that but *hit happens

[Exactly. Maybe the weaklings aren't the ones who don't sleep around, but are strong enough to choose who to sleep with.
[quote][/quote]Exactly

Don_Ese125:
I don't think there's a definite time for that. It depends on the parties involved. If i were a single parent,i'd introduce my child to my boyfriend when i'm sure we're serious,when i'm sure our r/shp is going somewhere. I certainly wouldnt parade a long train of "uncles" in my child's life,but on the other hand,i wouldnt wait until we're talking about marriage because the way my child relates with him would be a crucial factor in deciding whether we cld have a future together or not. I guess the whole idea is to find the perfect balance between too early and too late. I'd do it when i would be sure i loved him and he loved me,all of me,including my child,because he/she would be a part of me.

My thoughts exactly,

I will support my father/ I love my hubby but damn there is something about politics that makes people feel like they do not have to abide by any law, including vows to their spouses. I am waiting for my fatehr to show his true colors if the election he is in now favors him, I don't even trust him either.

If I it were American politics then I would support my hubby. No fear of having 2nd wife. Politicias here try there best to make their marriage work.

JJYOU:
I don't SUPPORT SOME GOOD FOR NOTHING WOMEN. my brother which of this 2 options would you choose for your daughters?

Abi ke, which would u choose for your daughter.

As for me non is acceptable. I am married and will fight to keep my marriage but once he starts to beat me or cheat constantly, I am out. Several women have been killed either by been beaten to death or getting some incurable disease.
Life is too short, I'd rather focus my time to taking care of my children than trying to save a marriage that may end up being the cause of my death.

Damn girl, okay may I ask what school u attended?
You educational background is highly questionable. Unfortunately, here u are belittling this guy like he is next to nothing because of ur "HIGH education" and u can't even construct 1 good sentence. Oga Oh. ROTFLMAO.

I don't even have any advice for you but I do feel sorry for your fiance though. He does not deserve someone like u. Not that I condone him lieing to you.

Sorry about your predicament. Before giving u any advice, please answer the questions below including what actually caused this to happen and then maybe I can give my 2 cents.

Are u legally married to him?
Have u called ur husband about this?
Do u have relatives you can put up with while you find a place?

ima1, I thought this through again and I think you should completely put the police issue aside, I don't know ur sister-in-law but i don't think she will actually do anything to harm you here. Try whatever you can to make peace.

First pray before you take any step on this issue asking God for knowledge in how to handle this situation.
Start by calling her (don't thank her anymore, just ask about her and her family's welfare).
You may be busy but make time, 5-15 mins of visitation should be fine.  
If she has children, take snacks or small items to her house for the children (it does not mean you are trying to show off but it shows u are trying to make peace).

Doing all these does not mean you are giving in or letting her be in control of you but it shows you are putting in the effort to clear the air. Even her family members will be pleased that you are trying your best. Try to speak to your hubby as well to calm down and try to resolve the issue. It will be in YOUR BEST INTEREST to settle this amicably. You don't have to be close to her, just do what you have to as a 'wife' in the family. Trust me you don't want to be the reason why both siblings aren't getting along.

Sea~Goddes:
first no matter what, you should have called her and thank her when you left her house, no matter how she treated you saying thank you wouldnt have taken anything out of you. you stayed in her house for free and eat for sometimes though she would have said no at the beginning but she didnt. it was bad on your path.

I absolutely agree with you Sea-Goddes

Regardless of how she treated u, you should have told her when u were moving and thanked her at least helping you out for the short while.

Try to talk to your hubby to get ur family together first if possible to help in this matter. If you have to pay her for your peace of mind, do so and if after all these she still harrasses you, then take up a restraining order against her.

@ Poster, why is it so difficult for you to care less about this woman, Not sure why you are stressed over trivial issues like this.
This is as clear as black and white, if you don't like her attitude or behavior, stay away from her afterall she is just your neighbor, not family that you will have to deal with.

iice:
[color=#9900ff]Una no dey pity us? Just dey cause brain aneurysms anyhow [/color]

LOL,

I don't believe in 50/50, I believe in a relationship, you do your best 100% and expect the other person to do the same,
If your partner isn't doing his or her best and you know it for sure, then u can make a decision to leave or stay after you have made you observations known.

iice:
[color=#9900ff]You say twist like it's a bad thing [/color]

my sentiments exactly

@ Poster, age has nothing to do with it. If he can handle been with a celebate woman, then by all means all is well. Because he is younger than her does not mean he cannot do without sex.

Ah girl major mistake, just like Davidlyn said, that was way too much too soon. If you are just dating and she is already demanding, what more she will do when you get married to her son.

Stop digging your self a major hole, I wouls advice you not take the bag of rice to her and cut back on some of the things you got her abroad as well. Stop sending recharge cards too. Girl please this woman is already taking you as a slave, it will seem as though you are the one trying to marry her son by all means by getting on her good side.

1 more thing, you need to call your boyfriend and tell him everything at one, it will be worse if he hears this elsewhere. You are just his girlfriend not his wife.

Ben20001:
"Kill" your half brother first.

she can't kill his half brother since both of them are at fault, \

@Poster, not even sure what I can say to you, You made your bed, now lay in it, ode oloju kokoro

Arlington:
If that was my case i will gladly pay for someone to help me .and if it is my sister or best friend that has such situations, i will do it without even thinking about it.

My thoughts exactly

ajilete:
Chisomquee is absolutely correct!!
i managed to potty train both my children at about 9 to10mths. Once they can sit up properly on their own.All you need to do is put him/her on the potty at the same time every morning, preferably after a drink of warm water. you may need to amuse your child so she will stay, i had to sit there in front of each with a toy, something rattly and noisy but i wasnt working full time at the time. if you have a house help you can get her to stay with your child and amuse her with a toy or music. When he /she has done the big one make a song and dance of it, ''Good boy,etc''. Then make sure you take her off so she doesnt associate the potty with a chair! if you are patient and do this for several weeks she/he will associate the potty with poopoo and eventually start asking for the potty. it worked for me and my children are of both sexes, and there was not much difference in their attitude to the potty.

That is exactly what i did. I potty trained both my boys at 10months, started when they were 9 months old. I took them to the potty once every hour, a lot of work but well worth it.

There is no big deal in this issue.
Whenever hea skes you for money, if u can, send him some and if u can't tell him u don't have any at the moment. Don't worry about whatever else he says at least he is not with you. You can ignore his 1 million text messages until u can afford it.

Confess to your wife about your wrongdoing, Make sure you apologize with all of your heart and MEAN IT. However, I will advice that you leave ur sister in law out of the story.
You have to do this rightaway, she needs to get treated because it could lead to much more complicated medical issues for her.
After this, behave yourself and be loyal to your wife.

mohawkchic:
~Me thinks her guardians meant for you to talk to her about boys!!"The Birds & The Bees" Not The How-To-Put-On-Sanitary-Pads speech!!

~She's got to that stage where unprotected sex will end up in Unwanted pregnancy,so without scaring her silly,talk to her from the heart,like you would your own sister,tell her the pro's & cons of having sex!! Coming from a man,and one she looks up to,i suppose it will make a heck of a lot of difference!

Mohawkchic, my thoughts exactly.
@ poster, I think what they want you to do is talk to her about boys and *ex. How to not have intercourse and or wait till her wedding night kinda talk. It could mean more to her coming from the opposite sex that she admires so much as opposed to parents. Her parents might have noticed that she respects and thinks so highly of you, hence why they are asking you to speak with her.
As per the cleanliness, her mother or a grown female can help her with that

Sisi Jinx:
Wow!!!! You are a better woman than I am.

Sisi Jinx, I wouldn't say that.

Remember there could be something else you could that I would not even dare. For some reason, I just feel so strongly about this, of course I pray it will never come to that, but if it is as a last resort, I would not hesitate.

I believe that used to be the case in the "olden days"

I can't speak for other tribes but in my tribe 'yoruba', the bride price is usually given back to the groom. This is just to show that they are giving away their daughter because of love and not for the money. The man accepts the money back and puts in the the brides' purse.
Leaving ones husband is frowned upon but no one will forcefully make you go back to the man if you don't want to.

I never understand any of your posts.

In a heartbeat,

Not a good way to die at all.

Actually this is not till death to they part.

This is even in death, they will never part.

I have a male child as a first born, not that I prefer it but that was what I asked God for. I always missed having an older brother as a child and always prayed for my first and 2nd born to be males. I got my wish on both requests,

Now I want a girl for my 3rd but I'm not sure if I want anymore children, lol, Time will tell.