₦airaland Forum

What's wrong with being 30+ and not married yet? People like this might be polishing up their careers,running their business and some might not want to get married @ all. Congrats to poster thought, the journey has only just started.God be with you and (me too) on this journey we just embarked on

21 but then im not 21 anymore

Like one of my ex good friend used to say, if Halle Berry, Cheryl Cole and Collen Rooney can be cheated on, the rest of the women of the world has no hope, Some men cheat some men don't, so if you are lucky enough to get a man that won't cheat on you GOOD!, if you are unlucky to get one that will cheat on you, when it happens cry me a river build a bridge and get over it! Its not the end of life! There are some men that you will believe that they will never cheat on their wife, but trust blud, these men are the worse, if some women wanna be naive, let them be, no one wether man or woman is immune to cheating i say no more!

what kin quesion b this one,    what about the man has a job n after they got married he lost his job? i have seen it happen wid my two korokoro eyes oo, n also i have seen a man that ddnt have a job, n 2 months after their wedding he got a very good job, moral of my story, only baba God sabi tomoro if him no get job wen yu marry him, u never know your marriage cud b a blessing that will open heaven shikena!

ehn ehn 5million ko, 5 million ni, mscheew

omo alaro:
I am 47 and i married at 26 (after NYSC and working). My first son is in his 2nd year in the university and my second son is writing his school cert exams right now. my colleagues are envying me now because most of them have their first born in primary schools now. The question i asked them is were you still not sleeping with women at age 26?.
God willing my boys will get married between 25-27 and my girls between 20-23.
If need be i will support them for a while just like my parents did for me and am happy for it today.

Kudos to you mayn, but what if your dawtas r not ready @ 20-23, i definitely believe this is a relatively good age for a woman to marry

one of my sis friends cuz had a baby by femi kuti early this year, apparently they r planning on gettin married soon

GOD DEY OOO, aafa n sanra, omo ijo n ru,

Hello peeps, just wondering how easy it is to get into a Nigeria Pharma company, I have some experience and I have a good degree from a reputable uni and also about to start my MSc in sept as distance learning. I am about to relocate back to Nigeria, but I want to know what the pharmaceutical sector is like, Any info will be helpful thanks.

Thanks for everyone that has replied,

@ kandiikane, he without a sin, cast the first stone, if you were not a virgin until you got married, please no need of been judgmental

@ Megastreet, I did not force him to impregnate me, check the first post again, I said it was  semi-planned by both of us

@ Lady T, I was suppose to join him in Nigeria by September

@ redman44 he relocated to naija cos he got a better job opportunity there and its not rushing cos like i keep saying we already started the planning

@ jenny i said we already started planning our wedding for next year,  we have already done the introduction

and finally @ Tee-Jay I reject been supported by the social services IJN, i don't blame you, when that is how u are being supported,

I hope these answers everyone's question plus if you check one of my first posts on NL I asked whom was suppose to ask how much my brideprice is to be, cos that was when his parents were gonna come ask my father my my hand in marriage and i was discussing it with him!!!

Ujujoan:
That's funny . . . .You have a 'target' for getting married and yet NONE for having babies

If you can't afford a wedding now, what makes you think you will one year from now when you have a baby to take care of.

We started a child fund like 2 years back, that is currently sitting in an ISA,

We have already started saving for a summer wedding nxt year, and because of the way we are, we wanted to pay for the wedding ourselves, with no help at all from any of our parents, we only just reached half our target for the budget,

Me personally, I will like to wait till next begfore we get married, so we can still reach our target, but i know both parents will now say that they will contribute if we decide to get married before the baby comes, I hope this makes more sense now,

at T-J of course I am Nigerian, but like jay bee sed its frowned on to get pregnant before getting married because of what "people will say" not cos of anything else

Argggh, so i just did a pregnancy test, and there were two lines on the stick this was semi planned by my fiance and I by the way. He was moving back to Nigeria, and i didn't want him to leave me in jand just like that, eventhough he has always promised no matter where he is its me n him. So now that im pregnant I kno my parents will be upset and want me to get married as soon as before i start to show, this doesnt leave a lot of time, although we have been saving up for getting married, me personally would like to have the baby before we get married, so NL what will you advice, do it my way (I.e get married after the baby) or do it my parents way (i.e get married in the next 2 -3 months) Please urgent advice needed from mature people. Thanks!!!!!

thats a good write up, I applaud you, please I too need a job in Nigeria , i have a year's experience and currently working in cambridge, how can you help

i do not understand why most Nigerian parents are like this, I must confess that my parents have never talked to me about sex and i am 23 .

The only talking they gave to me was DON'T HAVE SEX!!!! And in my teens i was wondering why they did not want me to, cos other things they say do not do this because, but sex was JUST DON'T DO IT NO JUSTIFICATIONS, I wished they had the the talk with me in a more informing way,

Even now my mum talks to my fiance about sex instead of me , I swear i so do not get that, n all she says is ''ema mo bi ese ma se oro ara yin, esha ma ti je ki omo woh"

Ok, so I'm in the office and I was just talking to this woman (she is in her 50s i believe)who never says anything when everyone else is talking about their kids, so I asked her how come you don't talk about your kids, do you not have any? (Cheeky I know ). She said no and I said, aww, did you not want any? (me and my big mouth) She said, I wanted, but I couldnt have any.

Anyways so this got me thinking I know about 3 people that are in their 40s and beyond and they have no kids because they have been told they cannot have any, , I pray this never happens to me, but I know it can happen to anyone and moreso, I think i have good reasons to be very worried

SO TO THE ULTIMATE QUESTION, WHAT WILL YOU DO IF YOU ARE TOLD YOU COULDN'T HAVE KIDS

Blazay:
No English names please!

I nor dey for 'colonio-religious' mentality abeg!

Most-def nothing with 'Olu'. . .'Chi'. . .'Osa'. . . and all that 'God this' and 'God-that' rubbish in them.

Sooooooooooooo archaic and trite!

All those LOCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAL names of 'virtuous' standings DID not appear on the birth certificates either.

Such annoying names like 'Faith'. . .'Hope'. . . 'Endurance'. . . 'Courage'. . . 'Chastity'. . . .'Joy'. . .'Peace'. . .'Fortitude'. . .

Not to mention those houseboy and housegirl names of perpertual sufferings and long-suffering and endless 'maltreament' from step fathers and mothers or indentured servitude like . . . 'Boniface'. . . 'Donatooose'. . . 'Ignatoose'. . . 'Aloyshoose'. . . .

Oh! Days of the week and months of the year. . . .buuuuuuuuuuush names!


Soinday. . .
Moinday. . .

NO "TARDED" BIBLICAL NAMES EITHER. . . Samuel. . .Moses. . . Joshua. . .Peter. . . Sarah. . . Deborah. . . RUBBBBBBBBBBBISH!!!!

your shindren are in trouble, as after all these ones, the ones you wont name them, there are no names left!

everyone wants a big wedding oo, but ppl that will come n munch jollof wid yu will not remember you n u will have your debts to pay, so be wise! Getting married is not about that one single day oo, its about the rest of your lifes and yu don't wanna be suffering after weddin day trust!

God Willing, 10; 9 boys and 1 girl or 8 boys and 2 girls

Eh ya, life is tough ooo, @ OP, abeg just keep praying, GOD is a God of possibilities, he will surely come through for you!!!!

Blazay:
Eeeyah.
Kpele.
If she is rare. . .do not let her go ooooooooooh. 
Me sef nor get job when I marry.
Just "DO IT" like Nike says.
Na dis kain suffer-head marriage dey sweeet pass.
You will both look back and cry and laugh at these days.


Do a small wedding. . . do not start having babies yet o!

I hope your parents can help you out like they helped me.


Please, reach out to your immediate family first.

@ Blazay, so you mean it So how did you cope, wow that must be a good wife, most ladies nowadays will not even give yu face, "yu no have job and you wan marry me, I don't think so" snm

@ poster, just see all these things you are doing as if yu are doin them all for God, hopefully yu guys will soon become husband n wife. @ Chaircover, words of wisdom ooo,

I know so many friends of mine that says to me that they will never date a man that doesnt have a good job, a house of himself etc, n me i tell them that in future imagine u wanna have a say, he will say to you did we make the money together, we ddnt so u have no say, n most of these women ends up bein maltreated, where as yu date a man cos u love him n u r with him tru thick n thin, trust me wen he is made it, you can say remember wen we dey suffer together ooo,

maybe if we have more women staying at home to bring up the kids, maybe the society would be much better than it is now, of course having said that, me i think staying at home to be a full time mum is harder than a 9-5 job, so when the time comes, i reckon i will stick wid me 9-5 job

Your girlfriend that cheated on you and you forgive, chai, me i yam very sowei, wen she come b yur wife nko, she will say he will kuku forgive me, so why not? hop on Brother, n then yio wa ma feyin bi sho wa lale wen they r doing it, then wen she reach yu, crocodile tears will begin comot, I am a woman of pride, its abomination for two ppl to be hoping on me @ the same time, mo taka oshi danu loruko Jesu, AMIN!!!!

Finally, our parents are meeting, My fiancé parents are coming over to meet mine, and at this meeting they want to ask my father my hand in marriage,(and also discuss bride price n prop pick a date for the wedding) I know this is the man I wanna be with for the rest of time, but I am Nervous as hell, because now it all seems to be happening for real, because before, it was just dreaming. How can I calm my nervousness??

Also I am scared our parents might disagree on so many things(his parents are more open, whilst mine are reserved), how do I make sure everyone gets along?

LadyT:
I dont see the point of putting an age to marriage. Yes we women have limited fertility time but I would rather marry age 30 or later for life then marry age 23 and divorce by age 45!

I don't know why people think if they get married at 30 (summin) they won't divorce. I know people that got married when they were 18 and they are still very much together and happy and I know people who got married in their late twenties and early thirties and guess what they are freaking divorced! Divorce is not based on age. Marriage is all about compatibility and love, If you ask God before you get married and He says that his ur husband, then its till death do you part

LadyT:
Big time I hate how Nigerians rush their children into marriage due to age. Marrying before 25 is too young for me. Because you know as soon as you marry the next pressure is to have kids.

people that their parents rush them to have pikins are mumu, no one can rush you to do anything!

LMAO, I cannot stop laughing, it seems like there is no hope for naija ooo, So what hope do people like me have for working in NNPC when there are thousands other out there,

^^^^^^^^Amen ooo, but even so he beats me, i beat my own back (the little i can do sha), i will even organise people to batter him outside the house anytime, anywhere,

afrikwin:
@ ifeluvely.
Oh sweetie , its coz someone said that ALL Naija girls don marry by 30

So not true, but the odd examples here and there i would say majority are waiting to "make more money"

why between age 25-30?

I so do not understand why people don't take marriage seriously anymore nowadays, Oga oo, personally I do not believe in divorce, I will rather die in my husbad's house than divorce, Call me naive, i dont care

@ everybody, he is definitely the one, i cannot imagine my life without him, I am gonna say whole heartedly that this is the man God has given me, no dispute. Just for the fact that he is going to naija, his friends have started advicing him to get me pregnant and go and do the trad wedding ASAP, but he said he wants the best of the best for me, and what his friends are advising is not. I am planning that i will be going to naija every three months till everything is sorted, I have no plan B ooo and i do not intend to have a plan B or C, he is my plan everything, so in this case, am i making sense?