₦airaland Forum

okonyia:
You are right Peter.Your family first, if don't choose your wife and children who else. They are first. You didn't make any mistake, but I will advance you should also reconcile with your brothers.

He made a mistake because there is no option to choose wife and kids. His wife and kids do not share studio space with his brothers, they do not live in same house.

So what is the business with his wife and siblings. If you have problems with your siblings then solve it or keep quiet.

If you cannot manage/separate the relationship with ur wife+kids and siblings. Then u failed. The best you can do is to keep quiet and stop disturbing people with ur failures. Just shut up and mind ur fucking business that u have always wanted.

My wife and kids are family not my brothers or sisters. Lol as if the kids will not grow up and get their own partners, so they should abandon their family when they get married.

In Africa we are very shortsighted, selfish and greedy. Reason why we are still here in this century.

Failed mumus, to manage the relationship between u, ur wife(ves)+ kids and siblings is not rocket science.

Ordinary family u can't manage, keep quite and mind ur business u can't, always constituting nuisance. Tonto Dike wanabe.

Buy the ML. Yes you will spend more to maintain it than the Venza.

Unless u strictly want an SUV, If not, instead of the Venza go for Lexus Es350 2008-2010 and have some money left. If you are bent on spending all the money go for the 2012.

pimper24:
A masters degree holder friend of mine has regretted not joining the band .wagon way back in his undergrad days to buy marks in some of his courses, an act popularly known as sorting. According to him, a GPA of 2.80 still hunts him years after he graduated even when he managed to get a masters degree abroad. A PhD has actuality become an up hill task with most of the schools turning town his applications after paying huge application fees.

The crop of American schools subject him to GRE and other funny tests (of course not TOEFL/ IELTS, he makes good grades) that at times make him sit exams with people too young to be his children, then a mail regretting not offering him admissions. He needs a doctorate degree due to a career part he is craving for. For the schools in Nigeria, his course has got few professionals around and the fear of spending years for a three year program scares him stiff.

He has excellent research proposals and even wrote a proposal for someone I know that is presently in one of the top schools in the US. He has a midas touch and a professional in his area. The surprising this is that he made a distinction in his masters degree, but all the schools where he applied for phdin America and Canada and even Australia and NZ keep complaining of his undergrad. Crop of Canadian prospective supervisors he will manage to get in touch with will advise him out rightly not to continue applying and for US, a regret letter readily awaits him after a rigorous applications and fees. They actually mention the undergrad.

Also according to him, the 2.2 level grade is due mainly to some unfortunate incidents that befell him in school. A lecturer accused him of not buying his handout and swore to make him fail, which threat the lecturer effectively carried out. That was his first carryover. GST causes, two results got missing and no help in view, 2nd and 3rd carryover. Then the big bang, 400 level, he almost dropped out due to hard times and missed a whole semester, he managed to write the exam and bagged an f, 3rd carryover, and finally got sick and missed exam at 400 level 5th carryover. I personally know this guy as a very brilliant fellow ( at least for him to finish with a 2.2 despite these unfortunate incidents and without any extra year).

He is really downcast and heart broken. I have advised him to check schools in Nigeria, China, Malaysia (where he got his masters) etc if he must go abroad again for his PhD but he insisted on going to Europe or America.

I wouldn't know if anyone has a better advise.

This is not true, you don't have a PhD position yet is not because of your first degree CGPA. It is just because there are not many PhD offers these days to cater for the huge number of applicants. So these days it is very competitive, Professors get emails on daily basis from students.

I had first class from a Naija Uni and also distinction from an European Uni for my masters but I only got a PhD offer after like 43 different applications.

Many of my friends encountered the same, some got positions and some are still yet to get one.

Just know it is overly difficult these days and not necessarily what you think, is the only problem. Continue applying till something happens.

BUSHHUNTER:
South Sudan always felt North Is their problem not until disintegration, The Southern part resort to killing of themselves over resources and boundary issues.



The Northern part which is the Sudan now stable and peaceful.


I pray this won't be the case in Nigeria in decades to come.

Not really, they might not have over blown political crisis but there is inflation and serious hunger in Sudan (North). They really hv no resources now.

Nwanna2588:
I don't see those that don't have educational qualifications as a lecturer. I see them as an interlopers who have come to take what rightly belong to us. Let me put it clear. You're not a lecturer or a teacher if you don't have any of these qualifications: NCE, B.Ed, and M.Ed. Those with PGD can be managed but on the ground that the right teachers have been employed.

I guess you are a teacher and you are this ignorant. Is education programme the only discipline that exists?
Do you really know what it means to be a University professor/lecturer say in medecine, science, engineering or other art discipline ?

To have teaching skills not necessarily a teaching 'certificate' will be of great advantage, no doubt.

No matter the level of education certificate you have without the necessary knowledge/qualifications in a particular subject, you are the least qualified authority in that subject.

OreoPaschal:
This has been a career path I always admire. I have googled things about it online and possibly the nearest tutorial centre in Lagos but nothing meaningful pooped up.


Thanks OP for sharing this wonderful piece. I just need a mentor that will guide me properly.

You can have a look at https://www.coursera.org/browse/data-science/data-analysis

'Their pensioner father is not also helping matters, very difficult to please."

With this statement above, I will only ask you, are you mad?

Bro you have the money and you should call the shots. They should be the one trying to please you and not otherwise.

Take control man. Be mean. Don't switch your phones for them. Pick their calls. Anyone that calls you, tell him or her that he or she should go and die. Be rude men. You have to survive.

While at that, make sure you don't pick up that guy. Don't bother about him. Let him sleep wherever they want to.

Also for now, don't think of divorce and don't invite any of them to Abuja yet. So they won't know where you live.

Menn, you have to survive for yourself first before anyone. Change it for them. Start being verbally rude to all of them. With that they will know you are not in this world to play. Be a man. Stand your ground.

Abjay97:
High insecurity in this country.. Thank God his father is safe.. Mikel should take his old dad abroad.. so he can live a nice and comfortable life far from dirty dirty country

There is no nice life abroad especially if you have lived all your life in your country home. If Mikel's Dad leave Nigeria for just continuous 1 year. He will just die of depression.

Young people here who travelled out are battling depression and as such indulging in things they wouldn't on a normal day not to talk of old man that has lived all his life in Nigeria

BOOMnaija:
Imagine d kind of house mikel's father lives in

What's wrong with the house? You don't like it or you want to tell him where and how to decorate his house

Odey1997:
Wow this is so lovely he is such an inspiration to the community
I know the LGBT bashers would criticize
Live and let others live their lives
Whether straight
Gays
Bisexuals and their brothers let's leave them to be who they wanna be
As far as they don't affect me nothing concern me

What is abnormal and wrong is wrong no matter how the west tends to paint it. If you support gay people and then against incest and bestialism. You are a hypocrite.

amstamon:
I've Been Wrongly Accused By My Very Best Friend And I Don't Know What To Do

I just don't know what to do at the moment, I'm so emotionally down and confused.

A friend who's birthday was today, decided to host us at a bar close by. On getting there, I greeted everyone but noticed he was quiet and moody.

30 mins later, he asked that we should meet outside. next thing I heard was that I was sleeping with her girlfriend. I tried to prove my innocence but it all fell in deaf ears. with anger,I left without telling anyone.

An hour later, he called and was like "someone saw both of us(I and the girlfriend) coming out of my apartment".
I don't know how to prove my innocence and please I really need you guys input on this matter.
I don't know how to make him believe me.
I know my writing is bad, but that's not what matters for now.

Please I seriously need your advice guys.
I swear with my life and father's grave I cannot do such

It seems you are Innocent but did his girl visit your apartment? If yes, evenif there is no hidden motive, then you no try.

Hiphopnaija.com

hiphop9ja.com

akinsmyk:
I know what you're talking about. At times it's not all about what you're talking about. It's about being happy and having peace of mind.

Can you imagine how heartbroken one can be in a place where you are not appreciated. Where you are always told you don't merit the advantage you get from what you were part of the start up? Where was Jude when the twin decided to sing from there room. They invited Jude to manage them when they realize their prospects.

We fans don't have to be selfish. We just want to get hits from them, do we know if some part wants out coz they're no longer happy, heartbroken, emotionally trampled on and damaged?

How long can we as a person endure and be in a relationship we are not happy in but coz people love to see u together?

This is part of it. They are so stupid to undermine each other. They are greedy. Each of them wants to make money alone without the other. Each of them thinks 'I am the one making money in the group and not the other'. That is why they don't respect themselves. That is why they are stupid. That is why they are ndi iberibe. If you cannot find happiness within your twin and blood brother, then were do you want to find it. Imagine you want to be a boss over your brother not to talk of twin. They are all iberibe people. Iberibe runs in their family. They are all too greedy.

They are not happy in the relationship just because each of them thinks others are feeding off from them. Imagine. Blood brothers .


All of them contributed to making the brand. It might not be equally but no one not even them can tell TRULY who contributed most.

skales67:
Lola wanted Paul and Jude to be licking her and her husband's a*se simply because Peter is the lead vocalist and songwriter and that the proceeds from deals and concerts should be shared 60-40 (60% for Peter and 40% for Paul and Jude to share)...when Jude and Paul refused, trouble started. Who does that?

That overripe pawpaw that calls her self Lola is lucky that someone like me no dey their family. She for act "Run Lola Run Nigerian Version"

Who is the lead vocalist? Peter? Who dash am. Lol. That one get voice, check all his new singles, he has different voice for all.

[quote author=akinsmyk post=68686631][/quote]So all these their chewing gum endorsements, business and shows is what you are comparing to their psquare days.

Lol. Imagine psquare being a brand to one nonsense loyal milk abi petri kitchen. Psquare was way richer than those brands even.

Do you know how much they collect for endorsement and shows as psquare.

If you know, then you will understand they played themselves. Idiot brothers who will rather downgrade than allow themselves win together.

Let me give you an example, the cars, houses and investments they all have now were acquired when they were together. Since then, have you seen any tangible material improvements from them? They can't even afford to change their gwagons, to a latest one now. Even Peter has sold his Bentley.

They played themselves. Greed took over them. Instead we all win, we rather go down mentality.

Later they will say they are good businessmen. Stupid brothers.

Imagine

Jude is now hanging with small small G boys to learn work.

Peter singing what I don't know and stealing songs from upcoming artist with the nonsense brand endorsements that they were even richer than.

Paul singing like their Danfo drivers and famzing all these young artists like Tekno, with his useless local hero beer shows.

The Okoye brothers are ndi iberibe. Iberiberism runs in their family.

Las las na shit go comot from am

Poster I do understand you. I won't judge you. The mistake is made already.

As a commenter rightly pointed, the problem is not only that you don't carter for the family financially but you are not 'bold' enough.

My advise forget about getting the control of your family back now. What you need now is to be smart and find a way to stand up financially. Option 1 is hustle your way out but this is going to be diffcult considering the state of the country. Option 2 which I will mostly do my self is to turn to an overly sweet and loyal husband/inlaw and then 'scam/obtain' the hell out of them. Look for a business and invest in it. Give yourself say like 2 to 3 yrs. And while at it forget about who calls the shots at home. Don't even care about what happens at home and your kids now. They will make good decisions that won't harm anyone. Neglect all those domestic roles, allow them do it. Focus on succeeding financially, you have the means around you just get smarter. It is a better option than leaving your home.

Bro, just get smart, very very.

Ipfreely:
You should be careful with some of these claims you make.

I don't think you are fair with your judgement. It's obvious this is not the type of accidented cars we don't like to buy in Nigeria.


The accident reported above can be anything including very minor accidents like small scratches on the car as one drives out of narrow parking spaces.

Also, it also seems the car was allowed to run in US after the so called accidents. So it most have been something very very minor and negligible for an 18 yr old car.

Let us be fair enough in our judgements. The seller is truthful enough for having provided the VIN.

fxjunkie:
A car means nothing here in the US, all this noise about a common car gift boils down to one thing: there's so much poverty in Nigeria.

Lie Mohammed. Car gift means nothing. How many car gifts have you given. Your siblings and parents in Nigeria how many have you gifted them.

Even if you have a car, are you done paying for it. And you want to compare with people who pay full in cash for their cars.

This is the mentality of broke foreigners in US. The rich ones do understand.

tripoli007:
Architect abi Yahoo BOY .. No salary earner or well learned person will customize his car this way

Lazy Nigerian youth, ordinary thinking you can't do. He is talking of Architectural yahoo boy.

maxwell767:


Igbo names are jst too unique


I also like some Yoruba names like

Ramotu
Jinadu
Sule
Olagide olaniyi etc

Isi ka a raa gi otu?

Lol, they must read oo.

ok oo

When is UNN matriculation date for 2017/2018 session. I saw 16th December 2017 on the school calendar.

All I can say is, men should learn to seperate their immediate family( wife and kids) with their secondary families (sibilings) from day one. Your wife has no business knowing details of personal activities with ur siblings and ur siblings have no business knowing ur private activities with ur wife and kids. These two boundaries have to be separated clearly from the first day you start thinking of getting married.

How did Amara have the idea that the ticket Ogbonna has, was bought by Nwankwo. How did Ogbonna get to know that Kanu bought a ticket for his son. This is all Kanu Nwankwo's fault. Separate the two and you would never see something like this. They get to meet and hear about each other only at family gatherings and ceremonies. With that everybody will be good.

some clarifications. Why are all the cars parked in a garage, dusty and already registered in Nigeria.

Omofunaab2:
Lol, i can't believe this

So Anambra sef get mud houses


Kudos to all the anambra supremacists and Ipod chest beating miscreants, you guys really got me on this

Yes we do. My grand father's mud house is still there. No one lives there. As a kid I used to wonder why my father and his siblings still left the house standing. Now, I know better.

The Igwe's are very comfortable. This is not their house. They have a very big family house just that it needs re-painting abi renovating.

He is just appreciating nature in those pics, I guess.

Sometimes you dont have to blame our parents, that is how they understamd life.

To break away from this entitlement mentality, you have to do it wisely and aggressively too.

My idea:

Stopping discussing the marriage with them. Put it on hold for now. Form annoyance with them. Withdraw all financial support to them for the meantime. Insist you are not happy since no one respects your decision and therefore even the little support you do offer, you cant afford it and you don't see reasons to continue. Try to pretend cutting off comminication for sometime. Initially , hell will let loose. Just pretend as if u dont care. They will start the blackmail on your wife. Don't even bend, insist they have to support you. Insist you are not happy that they should learn respecting ur decision. After some rough months they will get to listen to you.This is also good for you in future. Do everything possible to take off that entitlement mentality from them. Then go back to ur former responsibilities.

Then after that, start planning your wedding. Cut down a lot your wedding cost. If possible insist to ur fiancee on a very low key wedding and just a small celebration. You have to man up wisely to her.

With this, take the remaning money from your initial budget and start a foundation of a small house in the village . On a serious note dont hand over the money for the house to ur Dad because you will be suprised he wont do anything near building with the money.

You have to man up. Do everything possible to take away that entitilement mentality from your family. Help them to your capability because it is your responsibility but it shouldnt cost you necessary things you should do to stay happy.

Sorry this post is coming a year after. This is my morning.

I am in love with your WIRES idea especially the WC part which already is part of me.

However, till now I am unable to differentiate between empowerment (family expenses- fees and rents), Investment, reward and savings. Also, note that I think I am very disciplined. I already 'save' 60 percent of my earning every month (280k naira). However, I save with a target to get something. For Instance I was able to get a 2m car and a 1.5m land within a year and 7 months. I am not married though. I have no investments yet.

Right now, I am left with just the last 60% of my salary for the last two months after buying the car. Reading your post, I have now understood the full meaning of savings. This I already mapped out. I intend to open a new account and transfer the money I have to a new account as savings and then start life again by January. Following your idea.

However, I have a question. I intend to get married (+- 2 years time,1.5m budget) and then start building (atleast to be completed in 5 years,) on the land which of course is not an investment (residential house). Aside the WC and 'real' savings which are non-negotiable. How do you advise I best split my .IRE. (45 %) to be able to achieve this goal within the time limit since I am not even convinced if they are needs or just wants.

You and Evans who be elder brother?