₦airaland Forum

Argh.
I wud forgive my mum for abandoning/leaving me at a tender age.
The woman that brought me up,i wud still appreciate.2 mums for me then

Lagosboy:
Our dear Habeebah

My humble take on this issue of pre nup polygamy is i incline with the scholars who have rejected this notion in its entirety and i respect the opinion of those who have said a woman could choose to opt out of the marriage.

To your personal question Habeebah and subject to me consulting more learned scholars on this issues. However the marriage contract you had was probably based on civil vow or christian vows. Both of you are now muslims and the only agreement that stands is your vow to be husband and wife and the dowry. OThers things like polygamy etc is not subject to those vows as you now accept that the quran in syour guide, that your lord is Allah that the sunnah of the prophet PBUH is your way. If AR says he wants a second wife you cannot invoke your vows as christians to stop him as that would be double standard and believing in a part of islam and rejcting some part the quran says " Enter into islam whole heartedly".

Your second question as to when the divorce clause is included in the contract and th ehusband chooses to get a second wife, they would not be commiting aldultery in any way as the taking of the second wife does not invalidate the marriage. What invlaidates the marriage is when the husband pronounces the divorce or when the shariah council or court dissolves the marriage. It is the wifes choice to either use the clause at the shariah court to invalidate the marriage.


The man is in no way dishounoring the contrat if he takes another wife as like i said the contract can never be valid in islam if it states that the husand cannot marry a second wife. LEt us be clear on this again this pre nup agreement relating to polygamy sounds like this " I have a right to file for a divorce if my husband decides to take another wife". It is that . The agreement does not prohibit the man but what it does is gives the woman the option to opt out of the marriage or stay if she so pleases.

The contract of marriage needs two witnesses for it to be valid and the marriage is called aqd which is to tie a knot on something based on an agreement for them to be husband and wife.

Please my poeple this pre nup relating to polygmay and wife optinog out should be threded with caution as there is so much trouble relating to it. There is no gurantee that the second husband of the wife would not marry again. She divorces him and marries a third who might do the same and thre is no end in cycle. If required we could take time to explain the benefits and positives of polygamy and address the potential pitfalls and misconceptions.

For the sake of information it should be noted that also there could be a pre nup where the wife gives up some of her rights like rights to maintencce , right to eual number of days as other wifves etc. Such was the case of one of the wives of the prophet who gave up her night rights to Aishah as she was a bit old but just wanted to be a wife to the prophet PBUH . In the middle east some of the richer women who do not have husbands go into this kind of marriage with men and waive their rights to maintenance as they are richer than the men but just want husbands of their own.  etc . it is called zawaajun misyaar.

And Allah knows best

@bolded,not in this generation anymore,no one wants to share.IMO
@Lagosboy,I noticed it seems u personally dont like Pre-nip  
Anyways,sometimes it looks like a bad idea,as if one is waiting someday for the marriage to break up,then pick up whatever is due for him/her and find his way.lol
Personally,i did not do the pre-nup thing but i have friends who did,from every story they told me,it seems they are not too comfortable with it ie the ladies.I dunno why  
AR, think of another wifey?   Allah ki aiye .

Lagosboy:
What a shame! I feel for the sister and may Allah ease her burden and ease her pain. My claim was never to accuse women of claiming to be wiser than Allah in anyway. What i meant was you have the option of opting out of a marriage already set out in the quran. We do not need to pre program ourselves of opting out of a marriage you have not even gone into. This kind of agreement leads to more stress for the woman as she has inserted the clause into the contract thinking that it will deter the husband from doing such. However this contract is really a plus for the husband if we look at it in more detail.

Some men are players and will be happy to keep exchanging women in the name of marriage and would be happy for the wife to invoke the clause so he could have one woman at a time which means less expenses etc. Believe me i have seen men change wives like changing  cars. The crux of my arguement is Allah has protected women and islam is a complete package which when a structure is not upheld others might fall like a pack of cards.
Divorce is permitted for a woman with or without the contract, why should we allow our women pre program themselves to the notion of divorce when a sunnah is practised. A woman could talk her husband out of polygamy, she could practise it  and if she feels she cannot cope she could opt out of the marriage. However , pre programming means a threat to the husband that "i will leave if you take another wife" . If you fall into the hands of a man who is not really sincere with his lord and himself, such a man would trigger the woman invoking the clause herself and it would be like "she wanted the divorce not me" when he really wanted to divorce her because he has seen a more attractive woman outside,

I hope you understand my point of view sister zayhal, above all duah is a powerful tool to deal with all these problems for or lord indeed hearkens to the call of his slaves when the call unto him.

And God knows best.

Nice to know.

@Topic,Not a good idea.
What happens when the addict turns a new leaf?
Uju and MBJ . . match made in heaven.

apocalypse:
@bettymafy
I'm totally with you on this and we share the same view(s).
I think my mum , altho with good intentions , stepped out of line.
All those castigating the poor girl have done worse or would do worse than her or me.
I should have handled my business better and told the girl to leave when mum arrived but
this is first time such would happen and I didn't expect my mum to act as such. I thought she would respect my own privacy in my own house.
No I can not stop my mum from coming over but I can plan for future occurence

Wait.
I dont know if u are intentionally dragging this issue 
Your mum came thursday night,she did not complain,she ignored u and the girl and turned a blind eye.
Friday morning,common guy,if that your babe was sensible,she need not be told to pick her things and clear out first.
Mama waited for sometime,this babe was still parading the flat in shorts.As a mother,a pastor for that matter,your mum called the girl(thinking and assuming the girl has some wisdom in her head) as a wud be DIL,gave her a good lecture and ofcourse with Bible quotations abt fornication and keeping the marriage bed undefiled and your babe saw that as an insult 
Did your mum throw away the girls stuff ?How does having a mother to daughter talk translate to throwing out things 
Your girl get issues ooh.
If it were to be her OWN mum that came to that flat and met her there,had that lecture with her wud she be harping on it like this?
Your mum i guess did not bother discussing this with u cos she believed there was no problem,she assumed her little tete-a-tete with her future  DIL was taken in good faith.
Your babe is on a guilt trip although its safe to conclude she get correction issues,haba.

. . . .Now im longing for a kiss.
@OP,get a job!

jennykadry:
^^ Dayo I say cool down and wait until you marry woman put for house

Do you know how many women end up with miscarriages every year? Do you know how many women that have died during childbirth? Why won't a woman receive a medal abeg if hers went well for her?

She is doing everybody a favour; i tell you why

Country/Community/home(Environment as a whole): who knows how much help that child is going to bring into an environment.

Husband: Not only has she made him a MAN but also made him a VERY PROUD ONE @THAT: She has helped your parents(father esp) through you continue the lineage, she has made you a future grand pa, great grand pa and great great. . . . She has made your manhood something to relate with and not some piece of thrash. she has made you the collector of brideprice/dowry in the coming future. The product of the nine months bla bla bla if female will make you one day walk boldly down the aisle holding your daughter's hand and giving it out proudly to her husband in the church on her wedding day.

Wife: She has been marked off the register of barreness, Shes been vindicated from family members who might call her a witch or a woman whose womb has been destroyed due to countless of abortions. She has made a day of "omugwo(after birth visitation)"

Lastly she has made you a man that will help teach/train your boys on how to become men and tell your daughters what to expect from men as they progress in life.

How dare you call it nine ´months bla bla bla?

lol
lol and lol.
This made my day

dayokanu:
I wish I knew. Havent seen her here for close to a year.

Maybe if you know someone who speaks to her offline

wow.
Its hopeless then,if u dont know,i doubt anyone else do.
I have missed her.

. . .Those Teeth

Chelukwa nu
Imakwa iri ji a e jiri style mepee anya m
U guys needed to be there ihu ebe Darfur na abo nri Chei,ahuhu ga egbukwa mmadu na london.Nwa darfur buchara ji o ga eri in d next 3 weeks
Ikomus,a huru m gi oh.I gara poose-ue ga ezigbo mmadu,na a-target nwanyi
Dede Andrew,i kotaghim gi?ole udika akwa i yi?
Presido,ole onye nwe nwa ahu iku?lol,i mere onwe gi nanny throughout ,enyim nwanyi mechara juo m ma i biara omugwo
E sekwara m foto ooh,any denials m postu-e all the pinshures ebe a
@Nadneth,ndewo.I bu nwoke ka i bu nwanyi?

@Dayokanu,Pls,where is Toyosi?

Amychike:
your girlfriend should have left immediately your Mum came.It shows respect.

This is just it.
Respect the woman and respect urself,quietly give space No one needs to tell/teach anyone that.

johnwell:
From the look of things and as a man, the mum is wrong, she should have discuss this with the son. it is the son that brought this lady, not the mum, she has no power to do what she did, she was wrong, except she wants to or she is married to the son.

Am Married, anybody that comes to my house no-matter the relationship, you're a stranger and you have no right to decide in my house. whether you like it or not, you have to abide on what you see or ,

In addition, if in-case the son gets married to this lady how do you think the family will be? will there be peace between the parties involve? we all should let our mothers know that; when they come our house, whosoever, whatever the see they should let it be or they ask their child what they don't understand.

"sosongo k'mkpanutong"

Very sick.
If ur mum comes to ur house and sees u shagging a mad woman she wud keep quiet?
Heavens be praised,u are married and hopefully have kids. .
i dont know what u guys are fabricating,the mum and the sons GF have not had any problem b4.
Arrgh,cos we are priviledged to enjoy freedom and our eyes are open one shld just flush down decency down the drain  

asha 80:
Ify read the poster's posts carefully.It is not just this incident but there seems to be in the posters mind that he has been caged by the mum activities for a long time.Agreed that the mum took good care for him and even suffered for him but there poster also seems to feel that he needs some space in his life.I do not know about ladies but as a guy i know that feeling of wanting to do your own thing without the feeling that your mum is breathing down your neck.In one of his posts he said that the mums actions prevented him from being streetwise and i guess for him to say that he is a bit dissappointed in that.

The guy says he is in his early thirties so there is that urge in him to feel independent.This action by mum has deflated that a bit and if you are a man you must know how it feels.The issue here is the approach by the mum in doing it.i personally believe the best approach is calling the man aside and telling him how she felt about the whole situation and reasons for feeling so.A man must never be made to feel he is incapable on managing his home in a blatant manner his own unless he admits it.

Dont imagine things.
I dont how or saw where the OP said he felt or think that hes caged by the mum.
i dont still see how her mums action translated to "hes not man enough to run his home"
Lets just deal with the matter as it is.she talked to the girl,she did NOT throw her out puleaseeee.
Tell me Asha,if ur mum comes to ur house and see a girl sleeping over,what wud she do?

asha 80:
This statement is what differenciates a matured way of handling issues and an immature way of also doing so.

so now the mum is immature  
Jeez !
This woman has always been a strict woman who calls a spade a spade unlike most of us here.
O ma se oo.

zayhal:
about the prenuptial agreement, a lot of scholars do not hold the position you hold here. most of them say it's a quranic verse and anyone who says he/she doesn't agree with it is going against what Allah enjoins. Personally, it confuses me as we do not have any clear verse from the quran or any Islamic history to point at (as far as I know) where a woman and her husband held this pre-nuptial agreement and the man upheld it. This would have made it easier to have a firm position on the issue.

Now my own question is this: if the wife didn't know about this pre-nup till after the wedding and she wishes to have it with her hubby, is she allowed to still do it? or how does she go about it?

Lagosboy and Zubeyr,u are needed oh.
If the pre nupital agreement deals with polygamy, my dear brother Zubeyr i think you are mixing the issue here. Some scholars have the opinion that a woman could include it in a contract of marriage for her to have the right to divorce if the husband takes a second wife but NO scholar can say it is allowed in the contract for the wife to refuse the husband the right to take another wife. The issue here is simple , no one can make haraam what Allah has made halal for us in the quran.
@Lagosboy,Ok,assuming I and my hubby had a pre-nup b4 marriage and becoming Muslims and that Pre-nup covers death of one partner and Polygamy.
Now,we are,Muslims,what happens to the old pre-nup?
If a woman can include ih her contract of marriage that she be granted divorce IF the hubby decides for another wife in future,the hubby later deflects and goes for another wife . . what happens to both woman and husband?wud it be counted as adultrey for :
the woman if she leaves the man and marries another man?
The man for not honouring his first bond/agreement and taking another wife?
The contract of marriage,does it need any witness/es ie couples parent/s,an Iman,a lawyer
Btwn,lagosboy,thanks

asha 80:
+1

The people supporting the mother do not seem to realize the problem that is going to brew in the future here.From the poster's history it seems that the mum has had a very great control over his life till now that she cannot really believe that the son is now a grown up.

Why not sit the guy down or both the guy and girl and voice her views?By the action she just took she has zilch confidence in the ability of the boy to make his own decisions.Also going by the the way he was brought up he seems like a classic mummy's boy.How many ladies to be honest want a typical mummy's boy?

It is good that the mum went through a lot for him but there comes a time to draw the line.

I dont see this problem u guys are seeing.
The poster did not say the mum threw out the girl.
The mum told the girl to stop sleeping over till they are legally married.
Now,which mum in Nigeria wud not say that,not to talk one that is born again  
The GF prolly filled with guilt,got ashamed of herself,packed her things and left.
You ppl need to show me how that describes to being bossy  

apocalypse:
@ chaircover :
I thank you so much for all you have said. I'd never talk back to my mum rudely even if I were insane , I can only try to explain to her how I feel about her approach and if she fails to see reason I'll just have to live with it.
I know mum wants the best for me and I appreciate her concern but I'd be happier if she can direct all the rebuke to me , I have lived with her all my life and I can tolerate her. It's quite differend for someone coming from a softer background. Like I said my girlfriend is afraid my mum might still want to dictate what goes on in the home after we are married

Now,shes preparing to marry you,now is the best time for her to wake up and accept mama the way she is.Love is not all abt expecting someone to be what we want them to be,its all abt accpeting someone,all their faults and extremes included.
and Nope,mama wont be intrested in what goes on in your home after your mariage,she wud be too soaked in her bible to give u guys a thought . . she just does not want to condone any form of sin now that u are yet unmarried.
Moreso,if mama was the bossy type,she wudnt have accepted that your gf seeing shes neither born-again nor a deeper-lifer like her.
My mum is a pastor and i know what it was like growing up.
she wont just force u to be like her but she wont still be part of or see any appearance of evil and keep mute.Till date,i and ny hubby love and adore my mum but we are not born-again or even share same religious views with her and guess what . . .she has nit changed and we have not stopped loving her  

apocalypse:
@ dayokanu
lol. I looked back and I remembered all what my mum went through to raise me. I had a difficult childhood :
I was born premature @ seven months
I didn't start talking until way past my third birthday altho I understood all words spoken to me , needless to say I had a speech problem
I was always falling ill in boarding school so she had to put me in a day school close to home so she could tend to me.
Being her last issue , I'd like to see it as being her only issue cos of the stress she went thru raising me , she took special care in raising me.

What was I even thinking

lol
You were thinking of the humping u missed that day.
Sweetie,im married and we love swinging on the chandler,those sexy lingerie et all but when mama is ard,i compose myself in my matrimonial home as a good married woman shld.
I and my hubby even make jokes out of it,laugh abt her and we call her names like CCTV and feel bad anytime shes leaving cos inspite of everything,we wud miss her.
She loves to pray room to room midnight though silently so we mind ourselves while erhm . .
This is real life,your mum is your mum come what  . . u and your girl have to adjust and accept and love her . . she and her dislike for every form and appearance of evil,illegal humping esp.lol

[quote author=pres-elect link=topic=413608.msg6951483#msg6951483 date=1287230429]Nnaa ka m ga rie free food Biko. Ahuhu akariala[/quote]lol

Andre Uweh:
Biawa. Nri ka nku. Ji di iche iche ka I ga eri. Ma Ugba, ma osikapa (rice).
Ozokwa, udi egwu di iche iche.
Ona akpotu na Edmonton, London taa.
I wu onye Igbo mara nma nke ukwu.

eziokwu
Kam hazie my programme lee ma m ga abiari.
Bikonu,unu e nwere ji mmiri oku?o di available then ejim oso abia.

@OP,that Zambia girl pics,is it my eye or  

slap1:
JTF should start packing if they've nothing more to do. That priest is innocent, I know him. He only came back from London last month.

You know him as a friend or u know that he is innocent ?
If he is innocent,let him defend himself,shikena.

This is not good news.
I remember reading one of Chioma Ajunwas interview somewhere abt her reported drug usage and ban when she was saying it was "gworo"consumption that made her fail the dope test. .What do these ppl have to say now?
I hope the others yet to be tested wud come out clean.

Andre Uweh:
I think at this stage, you should be charged a fee for those answers.

seconded
Footprint . . Nzo-ukwu.
joints . . Njiko okpukpu.
to cool . .iju oyi
soft . . nlo(more of anambra)

If at this stage in this your relationship,your girlfriend is still yet to know and accept your mums direct approach to life and issues,then just prepare and make up your mind on who to throw out of your life. . your mum or your wife?
For Gods sake,whats hard to accept  Your GF shld by now have known and mastered mama's way of life rather than sulking and expecting mama to change cos of her,mama wont change.
I dont think mama is the controlling type,from everything u said here,she does not appear so,shes just one of those few blunt ppl who expects chastity and moderation from everyone at all time.IMO

pslm23:
Granny does not know oh! no be me go tell am! the couple are both out. She is in my home and he is at their home but the kids are still with me because DYFS says they haven't completed their investigation. I was asked if i want to continue caring for them until the investigation is over and if i can't they wld have to be placed in foster care. Of course i said yes. All this rubbish could have been averted if her husband had bothered to consider his wife's feelings in his terrible decision to send 5 year olds back to the village, not even town but village. I'm sorry, and i know most men will dis-agree here, but why are MOST (not all) of our  Nigerian men so stubborn? what makes them think that ALL decisions must come from them and whatever decision they make FINAL!; no questions asked; and if you dare to challenge them they decide to beat you so u remember your place and remember that they are the HEAD of the household? I just don't get it.
I would think that after living here for years, this man would have picked up a little change in culture and know that women have a say in almost everything now especially in their homes. Yes, he went back to Nigeria and got a wife but she was an educated wife not a village one. She is a graduate of UNIBEN majoring in Community Health. She is quiet, submissive to an extent and a good wife and fantastic mother. Why can't he listen to her? When they argue, he threatens her with "i will send you back to the village where u came from". Before she got pregnant, it was always one threat after another, "what kind of life did u live in school" i will marry another wife, i need children, my momther needs to see my children" and it just goes on and on. The day she told me these stories, i was boiling mad.
For all those supporting him, since they both got out of jail this morning (he bonded himself out of jail) he has not come to see his kids or asked me how they are. His wife is now at my house and really considering taking out a restraining order against him. Lets see how he will ship them off to Nigeria now!

hmmn.
My Sis,na wao.I wud say u too tread carefully,u are a friend,a good friend but dont let ur feelings directly or indirectly affect ur friends decision abt this issue.Let her think well,reflect wellu wellu before she take actions.Shes been through alot with this man to let go of everything now.
Children are blessings from God,the heritage of God and pride of every marriage so why shld theirs break their home or bring them pains after all the long wait?
Both Parties have tried to flex muscle and it landed them in jail They shld pleaseeee,try to talk as adults,each one doing away with all pride and find a way to resolve this non-issue.
@OP,Since ur friend came back from Jail,have she made any attempt to reach the husband?
Encourage her to call her husband or set-up a meeting for them,I know the hubby have been difficult but still,Things can be worked out UNLESS ur friend have decided she wants to leave the man.

apocalypse:
@ ifyalways :

The point I'm getting at is the fact that I don't think she should still[b] boss me around[/b] in my own home. I don't think you get it , she wants to order me around as if I were still a kid in my own home , tell me what to do or not and ENFORCE IT. This incident just happens to be the breaking point. I just don't want to relate how she sent her packing but it wasn't in the nicest of ways , and believe me my girl isn't one to get angry over such an issue but the way she did it would make the meekest person get hot , if not inflamed. I recall a name my friends used to call her back in my uni days : Honda Halla.

Being strict has its advantages , at least I turned out well amongst my peers who had a more laxed  upbringing but it still wasn't the best overall. I couldn't garner enough street sense and I generally was unaware of a lot of things.

How did she boss u ard  
Omo,u narrate ur tori,i said my bit ie how i wud react to that if it was done to me.
Your confessed u knew ur mum was one of the few direct no-nonsense ppl _{well-meaning deep down,if i may add} so why are u acting like she had another thing in mind and blowing things out of proportion as if she did it out hate  or anything.
she came on thurs,expected ur girl as a wise girl to take style leave on friday morn but she did not,she decided to have a mother-daughter talk with ur girl _{as usual using her direct no-nonsense approach} and u guys are acting
anyway,its ur problem,ur life,u can see and handle it anyway that suits[b] u[/b] best.

zubeyr:
"And among his signs is  that he created for you mates from among yourselves that you may dwell in tranquility with them and he has put love and mercy between you (hearts) verily in that are signs for those who reflect "Koran 30:21
In principle prenuptial agreements are accepted in Islam both spouses are allowed to have prenuptial agreements once is done it becomes binding upon them the violation of an agreement is forbidden in Islam however the terms of the agreement should not be against the teaching of Islam
A great deal of heartache can be avoided by women in her marriage if she is as the  bride to be agrees to and signs a carefully considered prenuptial agreements
I think the prenuptial should focus mainly on those points which have bearing on protecting women rights
1-Polygamy :if a woman  doesn't feel  she can allow her husband to marry more than one woman at the same time  then Islam allows her the right to refuse him permission to do this at the outset of their marriage however she must indicate this preference in the prenup Agreement or she will forfeit this right under Islamic law
2-Ma hr (dowry)
Ma hr is a gift from the groom to the bride of either fixed financial amount or Property and usually given immediately at the time of the marriage
however the woman can ask some of it may be deferred until later time where it will  be payable to the wife either upon the death or divorce of her husband
3-Financial  Independence
According to Muslim family Law the responsibility of the wife maintenance (Nafaqa)always remain with the husband the wife has no corresponding obligation to support her husband in Islam the woman property is hers alone Period and it is not subject to division or sharing with the husband in the event of marriage break down this clause should be included in the Agreement especially if the couple live in the west where some law require the couple to split their assets in case of divorce
The Koran lays down rules set out in the Koran that are essentially simple if applied and above all it enjoins people to write a will for the equitable disposition of their assets after their death however the Person is restricted to willing a maximum of one third of his estate and mainly to others than his legal heirs
The inheritance laws in the Koran are to be found mainly in chapter 2 of Albaqara and chapter 4 An Nessaa a total of 14 verses there are several verses that relate indirectly  to  inheritance such verse 106 through 108 in chapter 5 in Almaa idah which dictate that the  will be witnessed  by two witnesses other verses deal with the administration of property of infants

Hmmn.
Are u very sure of this or is this what u believe/think/pratice?
Assuming the man of the house is broke or unemployed what happens?
Please,i wud love to see/hear more of ur Muslim Family laws.

zubeyr:
"And among his signs is  that he created for you mates from among yourselves that you may dwell in tranquility with them and he has put love and mercy between you (hearts) verily in that are signs for those who reflect "Koran 30:21
In principle prenuptial agreements are accepted in Islam both spouses are allowed to have prenuptial agreements once is done it becomes binding upon them the violation of an agreement is forbidden in Islam however the terms of the agreement should not be against the teaching of Islam
A great deal of heartache can be avoided by women in her marriage if she is as the  bride to be agrees to and signs a carefully considered prenuptial agreements
I think the prenuptial should focus mainly on those points which have bearing on protecting women rights
1-Polygamy :if a woman  doesn't feel  she can allow her husband to marry more than one woman at the same time  then Islam allows her the right to refuse him permission to do this at the outset of their marriage however she must indicate this preference in the prenup Agreement or she will forfeit this right under Islamic law
2-Ma hr (dowry)
Ma hr is a gift from the groom to the bride of either fixed financial amount or Property and usually given immediately at the time of the marriage
however the woman can ask some of it may be deferred until later time where it will  be payable to the wife either upon the death or divorce of her husband
3-Financial  Independence
According to Muslim family Law the responsibility of the wife maintenance (Nafaqa)always remain with the husband the wife has no corresponding obligation to support her husband in Islam the woman property is hers alone Period and it is not subject to division or sharing with the husband in the event of marriage break down this clause should be included in the Agreement especially if the couple live in the west where some law require the couple to split their assets in case of divorce
The Koran lays down rules set out in the Koran that are essentially simple if applied and above all it enjoins people to write a will for the equitable disposition of their assets after their death however the Person is restricted to willing a maximum of one third of his estate and mainly to others than his legal heirs
The inheritance laws in the Koran are to be found mainly in chapter 2 of Albaqara and chapter 4 An Nessaa a total of 14 verses there are several verses that relate indirectly  to  inheritance such verse 106 through 108 in chapter 5 in Almaa idah which dictate that the  will be witnessed  by two witnesses other verses deal with the administration of property of infants

If the groom dies,whos gonna pay the remaining dowry

zubeyr:
"And among his signs is  that he created for you mates from among yourselves that you may dwell in tranquility with them and he has put love and mercy between you (hearts) verily in that are signs for those who reflect "Koran 30:21
In principle prenuptial agreements are accepted in Islam both spouses are allowed to have prenuptial agreements once is done it becomes binding upon them the violation of an agreement is forbidden in Islam however the terms of the agreement should not be against the teaching of Islam
A great deal of heartache can be avoided by women in her marriage if she is as the  bride to be agrees to and signs a carefully considered prenuptial agreements
I think the prenuptial should focus mainly on those points which have bearing on protecting women rights
1-Polygamy :if a woman  doesn't feel  she can allow her husband to marry more than one woman at the same time  then Islam allows her the right to refuse him permission to do this at the outset of their marriage however she must indicate this preference in the prenup Agreement or she will forfeit this right under Islamic law
2-Ma hr (dowry)
Ma hr is a gift from the groom to the bride of either fixed financial amount or Property and usually given immediately at the time of the marriage
however the woman can ask some of it may be deferred until later time where it will  be payable to the wife either upon the death or divorce of her husband
3-Financial  Independence
According to Muslim family Law the responsibility of the wife maintenance (Nafaqa)always remain with the husband the wife has no corresponding obligation to support her husband in Islam the woman property is hers alone Period and it is not subject to division or sharing with the husband in the event of marriage break down this clause should be included in the Agreement especially if the couple live in the west where some law require the couple to split their assets in case of divorce
The Koran lays down rules set out in the Koran that are essentially simple if applied and above all it enjoins people to write a will for the equitable disposition of their assets after their death however the Person is restricted to willing a maximum of one third of his estate and mainly to others than his legal heirs
The inheritance laws in the Koran are to be found mainly in chapter 2 of Albaqara and chapter 4 An Nessaa a total of 14 verses there are several verses that relate indirectly  to  inheritance such verse 106 through 108 in chapter 5 in Almaa idah which dictate that the  will be witnessed  by two witnesses other verses deal with the administration of property of infants

Wow.
Inna-res-ting
Im begining to wonder,it indirectly implies that many Muslim married women does NOT know anything abt this.
Is there a hadith or sura to support this?
Wow.

pslm23:
Hi everybody.

It's 4.05 pm Thursday and I just want to give you an update. Last night, aapparently the screaming and fighting between my friend and her husband reached another level. this morning the fighting got more physical and he beat her, she hit him back but of course he beat her up more. She called me to come over and the cops were already there thanks to the neighbors who reported a domestic dispute going on.
She pressed charges on him and he also pressed charges on her showing the police marks and scratchings on his face, neck and chest. She claimed self defense but they still hauled both of them to jail.
i have the twins staying with me for now. My friend and her husband are both going before a judge on Friday. that's all i know for now

Old boooy
How did it get to this point?
Now,i hope grannie flies from 9ja and come have the twins by force?
Simple matter wey dialogue,understanding and compromise for solve.
Something gud might still come of the this,they might reach a peaceful agreement whilist at jail.lol
@Op,does grannie have any idea of the latest update?

Girls sef 
If i were your GF i wud Thank God that i got a motherly and caring woman as a wud be MIL.
You mum did not insult her or throw her out she only said what she expects of a well brought up lady.
Times have changed and its NOW norm to fool ard and sleep together b4 marriage but Common,_{im assuming u are in 9ja} your babe need not be told to accord herself and mama a lil'respect and quietly give space when mama was ard.Some things need not be said out nowwwww.
If she decides to spend 2 weeks at your parents house,Im sure your mum wud not bat an eyelid.If your girl really saw this as an insult then she get issues ooh.
Mama is actually telling her to easy with the weekend-ing and sleeping overs,just incase things go wrong and she sees that as an insult 
I believe what u said abt stoping ur mum from visiting cos of this non-issue is a Joke ?

excanny:
Try to vomit as many times as you can. Brush your teeth and you'll be fine. Declare a state of emergency against all roaches. Prepare for military action.

snthesis:
Did u chec if it twas female or male. If female check if its pregnant or not. If pregnant den I guess u hav a highly nutrtious meal-d envy of a billion chinese

hahahaha

queeneve:
If she is a christian, then she need to pray and ask for direction from the Most high,

She also need to write a letter to her husband detailing her exact feelings and offer seperation, not divorce so that she can fast and work on self while she is seeking direction,

Seperation isn't always bad and does not always lead to divorce but sometimes when things aren't going in circles, you may need to step out and see what you are not getting,

If the husband is not for the seperation, then you will need to get the help of a sex therapist who can assistance in both of you communicating the sexual issues or desires. IF your HUSBAND love you, he will want to work it out,

GOOD LUCK,

rofl
abeg which section was this thread moved from?

LOL
Becomrich ,abeg where i fit get ur gift abi money ?lol