₦airaland Forum

This is very subjective and so there's no right answer. Its all about balance, every relationship needs a small break allowing the couple to miss each other. Just because you leave close by doesn't mean you have to be under each others noses.
I have been in one in the past and that didnt stop us from living our own lives. Its good to have a life outside of your relationship.

See confusion! You know your heart belongs to the first girl so fight for her, show her you care by spending time with her and her folks and with ur folks as well. It's been a year and probably she feels its all happening too soon so be patient with her. Marriage is a big decision and i guess she is trying to decide who is best for her.
If all ur efforts fail to get her to decide soon you can tell her you both need a break for a month or so where you do not communicate with each other or see each other. Only she knows whats in her heart, so this should help her prioritise, sort out her feelings and come to a decision. Maybe the fear of loosing you will help her realise its you that she wants.
As for the other chic, I can only advise you go real slow so that you do not lead her on and end up breaking her heart. You do not want to end up losing them both.

[quote author=~Killz~][color=#000030]Things like what? [/color][/quote]LOL! Things I don't want to repeat to anyone else! You know what they say, lady in the street and a ......

Sweetlemon, some guys are attracted to innocence because they feel they can make a good wife out of her. Others see it as a way to manipulate girls for s.ex alone. Either way it means they see you as a delicate person, soft spoken and gentle and this is me speaking from experience. It used to annoy me alot till date. My man has changed his mind because sometimes he is shocked at the things that come out of this mouth
Next time ask the guys to explain don't just take their word for it. It means different things to people.

I don't know why you still refer to this as a relationship. Its sad that people change but this is a lesson for you. Let her go when she realises what she has done to herself she will come back apologising.
On the other hand, you sound very controlling by checking her phone and this public displays of anger. Is this the space she's talking of? Have there been an history of this in the past? Please check urself as well so that you don't unintentionally damage the next relationship.

This is very serious. You need to open up about this issue now before it takes a turn for the worse. Your father seems like a very smart man so I'm sure you can confide in him before bringing the matter to your wife. There is no easy way to break this news to your wife but you can careful with your words and attitude when talking to her. Since you are involved in the ministry I would suggest talking to your pastor honestly about what happened and seek counsel. I am glad you know what you did was wrong but how you react now will determine how this ends. Good luck and oh congrats!

You have received good advices already. I am just surprised at the sudden change and wonder what cud have happened. I know its hard not to call and tell him what you know but pls let him wrap up his business and get in touch with you. Talk to him calmly and get tot the root of the problem. If he's still elusive then leave him, at least you tried.

Idowuogbo: Harmless? Emmhhh.... Do u put meat infront of a tiger and expect it to smell it and walk away? Noo!!!!! Na u dey jonz o!



Sharrrrappppp!!!!!!

Goat!

@Idowuogbo, you will not kill me with laff on NL!!!

[quote author=De~Blunt]My girl subjects me to a routine phone check on regular intervals, in which she checks my call logs, chats and texts. Last week I refused her from such checks and she got mad, I opted to leave her house but she insisted on throwing me out naked (it was abt 8am, I had just a boxer-short on). I refused and suggested to her that I dressed up first but she got violent and tried to push me out. After much tussle I decided to let her win cos she was creating a scene and she had scarred me badly with her nails. I was thrown out into the corridor with just a short on(embarrassed) and she kept releasing a piece of my clothing to me every 5mins (not funny) but she never released my phone and insisted i give her the unlock password.

I have decided to call it quits with her as this is the third time she has gone physical on me and I am afraid I might retaliate someday and get myself into serious trouble. The problem is she still has my phone. So I ask does a girlfriend have any right over her guy's phone?[/quote]LOL! Go back and get your phone, she's in the wrong. Just make sure you're in tight leotards so that there is no part 2 to this story

They say Karma is a bitch!

ronkebp: This money issue, is what is still causing misunderstandings between my dad and mum, my dad feels he needs to know the in and out of my mum's money and she is like; No!!! you can't know what i earn and how i spend my money.

That is their own wahala, i don't hide what i earn from my hubby, he knows how i spend my money and not that he cares a bit, at least when it comes to money, we are open to eachother, that will be '-1' of marital problems.

I do not think any woman should hide her earnings from her hubby,only for reasons that might affect their pockets, example, if the guy is a compulsive gambler, a drunk, a sex addict (who loves to visit brotels), and so on and so forth, apart from these reasons, i really do not see any other reason a woman will be financially stingy to her hubby.

I had a friend who lost her boyfriend over a pack of cornflakes,can you believe that? the guy came over to her place and wanted to have some, and she lied to him that it was mine, as God would have it, i was actually going to her room at the same time she said no to that guy, on getting there, the guy asked me if he could drink some, (meanwhile my friend was stepping on me) and i innocently removed my feet and said the cornflakes was not mine but hers' and i was looking at her, like 'why would you say it was mine, the guy got up and never came back, who knows if he was just testing her. Well, i felt bad afterwards, not for me though, but for her.

LMFAO! What a cheapo! Common cornflakes! LOL! How will she even start to tell people the story of her breakup

I believe the husband's role is to provide for his family but whatever money I make he should be aware of it. However, when things are hard it is partly my responsibility to help out in any way I can, If its to help out with foodstuff and other things to give him peace of mind to focus on getting back up and paying other major expenses. If he needs my help then why not, is it not for us? I will NEVER ask for the money back, if he insists on paying back when things get better, then fine (personally I feel its insulting to ask for the money). I am not doing him a favour.
This is what works for me, I don't know about others.

ogugua88: You only live once lol

Abi o!

TroyJay: Boy. . . Do i love when ladies come out of the closet.

I'm not locked up in any closet I don't know the women you know but the ones i know will and have done it!

lefulefu: eyaaa
but why chidi mokeme go just break madame ita giwa heart nah upon all the money and contract wey she dey give am
ehn so pictures of the wedding dey?
i be hear say the wedding na low keyed wedding and dem be do am in secret make madame bakassi no craze come spoil the wedding

No too low key o!

ogugua88: I expressed my feelings to my bf first. It was very awkward putting myself out there because it was something I'd never done before. I'm so glad I did though! Wasn't about to let that one slip away at alllllllllll lol. Sometimes, you have to go with your gut instinct.

Lol! Exactly. When its the right guy you screw those tradition bullshit and just go for it.

onye ego: don't generalize, not all men cheat on their women.

I am sure not all men cheat. Else I wouldn't be where I am

lefulefu: yes nah like nollywood actor Chidi Mokeme cheating on Ita Giwa.Omo i heard that Ita Giwa has been breathing fire and brimestones ever since she head Mokeme dey get married to one sweet looking igbo girl from im village

The marriage is done, do you want to see the pics?

Men prefer to do the chasing and most men don't like it when a woman ask them out. I have asked my male friends this question and this is what they told me, only a few don't mind. I think most women are open to this but don't just to avoid criticism from men only because she expressed her feelings. I have done it and I don't regret it one bit because now he keeps saying he's at his happiest since he met me

LMFAO!
There is nothing wrong with dating an older woman but HOW OLD is old?? The issue is that men being men will still cheat on her whether its for love or financial reasons

gegee: the president was just plainly stating a fact to let them know why he thinks nigeria needs their help with our army. that i think is doing something about our below standard army

With his history I'm not holding my breath. I'm still waiting for him to make his real mark in Nigeria, hopefully good luck will be on his side

gegee: nigerians like self deceit too much abi our army no dey below standard ? abeg make unna park ! and unna think say the foreigners no know say everything for naija don rot finish na news ?

A civilian like you can scream it out for the whole world to hear but the president has higher obligations and much is expected from him. If he feels its not up to par then do something about it instead of being a sitting duck or criticising. Just my opinion.