₦airaland Forum

fstranger1:
Haramu. . . what are you doing Isale_gan2?

I was blowing a kiss, not kissing.  Big difference. 

Do you work in HR?

That too. 

Badagry,

Don't make me reach into this computer O.  I'll grab your neck with one hand and slap your face off with the other!  Capisce?!

In this thread:

- We will delve into the challenges of living abroad - foreign affairs

- We shall provide therapy and support to our fellow Naijas abroad

- We shall attempt to answer general foreign affairs questions from all Naijas or send them somewhere else, preferably to the Romance secction - hehehehe

- We shall give advice on anything and everything to those Naijas living abroad or with family abroad

- We will tackle the age-old question, "what is the meaning of life and what is my purpose in the world?"  Or better still, "which came first, the chicken or the egg?"

- Using your very eloquent and timely presentation, we shall see if you and I can combine our resources and form an entity (be it charitable, for-profit, educational) that will bring together expatriate Naija bachelorettes with Naija bachelors looking to emigrate to Europe or the Americas. * This idea only occurred to me when I saw the below:

buzugee:
all my big sisters friends after years of not finding hubby in england all moved to nigeria in their late thirties. today they all live in lekki and victoria island with their husbands in big houses and 1 or 2 kids. their british 'glow' brought the men to their milkshake as soon as they landed in naija 
my milkshake brings the boys to the yard 

- I also wish to extend my very analytical and problem-solving mind to help Badagry; I see he is world-weary:

i currently live in america and it is an extremely stressful country. very harsh place to live. wouldnt wish it on my enemy.

If you fight me on this, Badagry, I will simply change the name and take away your 15 minutes of NL fame. 

* We will not be doing this; I am not a pi-mp.  I can't speak for Badagry though.

[quote author=eku_bear link=topic=589689.msg7583973#msg7583973 date=1295728538]What an informative post, @isale_gan![/quote] 

buzugee:
who be badagry ? abi you get conjunctivitis ni ?

That's your new name.  You got something to say, you know where to go.  I'm done with this thread until someone requests info or the OP returns.

buzugee:
lmao you know my intention was not to be misogynistic. i am speaking from experience. i have family members who are female in exactly the same predicament. middle aged, no kids, living alone, in america, and not too happy but dont want to go to nigeria for fear of the unknown. (extended not nuclear family)

Badagry, go here:

This is a general thread to continue our discussion re: America, Life Abroad, whether Buzugee is a misogynist or simply looking out for the womenfolk, etc.

This should get you started.  I have to go but will add to this when I return.  Meanwhile, it's your show, Badagry. Go on and elaborate.

buzugee:
i totally feel your pain bro. i currently live in america and it is an extremely stressful country. very harsh place to live. wouldnt wish it on my enemy.

buzugee:
so OP do not listen to any of these armchair psychoanalysts, psychologists, psychiatrists, mind benders and pseudo-soothsayers. go in search of your happiness in nigeria BUT PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE do not leave america until you have enough money to buy a small house for yourself in nigeria. dunno what house prices are like in nigeria but i am assuming you should be able to get a bungalow for 40 thousand dollars. so try to make some more money. do overtime or whatever it takes to get that money. then go off in search of your happiness.

buzugee:
best ever advice yet. and the person is a 'she' ? please dont spend your fertile and beautiful years in misery in america like so many nigerian women do. before they know it they are over 30, angry, no longer attractive, husbandless and irate in america. i see em in chicago all the time 

[quote author=isale_gan2 link=topic=589689.msg7578917#msg7578917 date=1295644323]Buzugee or Badagry or whatever you call yourself. I'm gonna rake you over the coals for your not-so-subtle misogynistic "utterances" one day when I'm feeling up to kicking some butt, ok? We'll meet again. [/quote]

buzugee:
lmao you know my intention was not to be misogynistic. i am speaking from experience. i have family members who are female in exactly the same predicament. middle aged, no kids, living alone, in america, and not too happy but dont want to go to nigeria for fear of the unknown. (extended not nuclear family)

oldbende:
Once again I thank your all for your contributions, I have lived in North Carolina since November 2007 and I think the best way to reduce the stress is to move to another city within the state.

Thank you all.

You're not alone.  A lot of immigrants are in the same situation.  Not just Mexicans or Nigerians.  Lots of Russians, Ukrainians, people from all over the world.  I think Somalis are the only ones that I haven't met with that problem. 

If you live in North Carolina and are able to be employed, kudos to you.  I know they adopted e-Verify and it is statewide, not just for government employees - private businesses have to use it too.  I know that if you're already employed, your employers cannot try to use it on you.  It's for new hires only.  Any employer that uses it are obliged to display a sign in the interview room or personnel office advising applicants that they use e-Verify.  In that case, just excuse yourself - say something like this place sucks and I've changed my mind.  If you apply for a job and somehow get notified either before you start or within days of starting, don't be intimidated into signing anything.  Do not sign anything.  You're not obliged to explain anything.  As far as you know, someone made a mistake somewhere.  Challenge them on why you were not notified they use e-Verify.  If you must, tell them you have an immigration attorney that is handling an ongoing matter, and you just want your paycheck now cos you don't know how long this crap will take to resolve.  Don't sign anything! Finish your day's work and don't go back.  They still have to pay your though, but be smart about it. Don't contact SSA and don't send anything back.  Don't panic and abandon your home thinking INS will come.  Talk to other people you trust.  I'm not aware of anyone that has been hunted down simply because of e-Verify exposure.  Congress and INS/Homeland Security have not decided how to handle at this time. If anyone has info to the contrary, they can post it, please. (Also, I do not recall if there is a maximum number of employees before a company is eligible for e-Verify.)

This is all assuming that you use a SS # of course - either yours that is not eligible for work, or someone else, or a madeup #.

If you want to move to another part of NC, keep it in mind.  Because you may be looking for a new job.

Of course, you can always do your own business, or work for someone who will not require certain things; work as an independent contract if you're able.  Even though the IRS and each state's department of labor are coming down hard on employers for that too.

If you choose to relocate to another state, definitely pick a state where they have not adopted it and there is no ongoing talk of the state legislators trying to adopt it. ok?

Of course, that is not the only consideration; some states are adopting restrictive laws like those preventing some immigrants from getting drivers license; empowering police to check your status in some cases; someone else mentioned job availablity.  I know where I am, the unemployment rate just went up, though we have yet to impose e-Verify on all employers.  Any company doing government contract work must use it, even, for example attorneys representing utility companies thst are partially funded by goverment funds.

I don't want to get too technical.  If this doesn't apply to you, it may apply to someone else out there.

Get more information direct.  This is abbreviated. If you have any immigration problems, contact an attorney listed with AILA - American Immigration Lawyers Association.

spyder880:
Somebody has wasted some years of his life in an unhappy environment and has only 13k dollars to show for it and you want him to keep enduring the punishment just because he will be smelling white sshit instead of black, you dont wish this guy well!
@ OP, hang on in there, by the time your mates have 5 kids each and you only have 20k saved + the stress, you will realize what you just walked into.

Where were you when I went solo, against the grain, to advice he follow his instinct ?  Dude was ready to buy his plane ticket for Pete's sake.  The very definition of "intent."
Just wanted to add: Also, $13k is not nothing.  Ask any American how much they have in savings - regardless of any high-faluting "income-level." Most people are living on credit.  I'm very proud our Poster saved that much money!  He must be very adept at avoiding western union though.

spyder880:
The holiday wont be cheap, the flight tickets and living expenses will kill him, couple that with our people's hunger for dollars from anyone who returns, else they label you a failure. Plus he will be out of work for six months?

spyder880:
For those asking him to take a vacation to naija, didnt he stay here before, what has changed, watch my siggy.

Dubious? Ambivalent? Devil's advocate??   

oldbende:
I thank all of you for your contributions, after reading your posts I have changed my mind to remain in the states, this forum have help me resolve one of of the most controversial issue in my life, moreover I'm a guy not a girl .

Once again I appreciate your contributions.

OldBende,

I'm sorry I thought you were a girl.  Not sure if it was something I picked up from your other posts.

So, you've decided to stay?  Are you staying in the same city?  Do you live alone or with family or friends?  You said you called a lot of people when your're stressed or depressed, how're you planning on fixing that - coping when next you feel down? 

I guess, for someone who 2 days ago, sounded so fed up to the point where he's already purchased his plane ticket, I wonder what's changed. 

All in all I am glad you made a decision with which you're confortable.  Just about everyone who posted thinks Naija is too messed up to relocate to right now.  So you can feel good about your decision. Take care! 

And you can always resurrect this thread to update us.

ola olabiy:
I don't like the way you make jest of Kobo. Please, stop.

She makes her point without abuse and discusses issues.

Please, guys.

I did not make fun of her.  I stated my opinion.  The other line you're looking at I was actually talking about a post in another thread.  Read my post well.

My only interaction with her was twice - one mindless and personal attack, one other which I didn't really mind.  But my general opinion is from reading her posts which at this time I rarely ever ever do.  No hard feelings.

I've given my advice to the OP and I'm done for now.

[quote author=eku_bear link=topic=590472.msg7580164#msg7580164 date=1295661223]More insight into fstranger1's sinister past! [/quote]You're on your own, bro.

[quote author=Kilode?! link=topic=590472.msg7580159#msg7580159 date=1295661164]It is a process bro, I see Nigeria moving to that level in the next few decades. Much faster If we get a benevolent, Ideological group of leaders.

One, Nigerians in the diaspora will probably become suffocated by the changing fortunes in the west and look more towards home, like Chinese and Indian professionals, I see them demanding and struggling for a greater share of the political and economic pie and in the process naturally drive changes. Unlike the diaspora generation of the 70's,  their number, the availability of instant information and the reduced opportunities in the west will be a major factor.[/quote]I like this man.

Becomrichn:
I lived up in lagos,I am from both Ondo/lagos state. Like I once said I am related to chief Gani fawehinmi/chief Alex akinyele. You can see both men are a mix of for and against ibb(left and right). (Against IBB and for IBB.). i have seen chief alex akinyele on several family occasion, but i was young then.   I also suppose to be related to me is  Bimbo Roberts (now Bimbo Oloyede) formerly with NTA news/channel. But I have never seen her in my life. I left nigeria along time ago. i knew they call her father daddy robert.that is all i know about her.

you have a problem nigerian, wake up.

Becomerich,

I think we have a few things in common.  Where did you go to Primary and secondary school in Lagos?

Also, until I get a response to my questions from yesterday, I refuse to take you seriously any longer.

[quote author=isale_gan2 link=topic=589851.msg7573378#msg7573378 date=1295576738]Yes, ignorance is a disease.  But I don't have a problem with you, Becomrich, except when you guerilla-post images of dead people.  At least, some warning would be good.

What political party would you run under?  How can you campaign to rule Nigeria while campaigning to break away one region to go join Benin Republic.

Wouldn't that inhibit creativity?  What about the architects?[/quote]
https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria?topic=589851.msg7573378#msg7573378

fstranger1:
Please go ahead!

That guy is definitely high on 3-day old kunu!

Am glad you approve.

[quote author=eku_bear link=topic=589689.msg7580063#msg7580063 date=1295658585]It is an almost passive-aggressive sort of love. Like I said, she is extremely weird, but means well.[/quote]You my dear can go sit in acorner.

frosbel:
Nairalanders, please forgive my rants.

It's now weekend after a stressful week at work. Please allow me pour my heart's inner felt turmoil.


Maybe I should stop reading news about Nigeria or try to look for a small piece of good news coming out of our dear country to cheer my heart.

All I ever see or hear is misery, death as cheap as Gari, children with no future, churches now focused on business, mosques focused on mass killing,

Are you insane?

[quote author=eku_bear link=topic=589689.msg7579957#msg7579957 date=1295656578]^-- I am a big fan of @Kobojunkie. She is extremely weird and fixated on some strange things, but overall a nice person. Very likely a heart of gold.[/quote]

fstranger1:
^^^^

She sounds like someone who believes in miracles in that quote from Isale_gan2

Very interesting!

Not a fan.  Always sounds like she hates Nigeria and black people.  I don't read her posts.

Hey. Am contemplating taking this guy out with my bare hands. https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria?topic=590541.msg7579955#msg7579955

buzugee:
lmao you know my intention was not to be misogynistic. i am speaking from experience. i have family members who are female in exactly the same predicament. middle aged, no kids, living alone, in america, and not too happy but dont want to go to nigeria for fear of the unknown. (extended not nuclear family)

yeah yeah no prob whatev carry on can't fight with you right now badagry. i'm too stupefied by what am seeing below. who'd a thunk it? kobojunkie may not be a robot but an actual person with feelings afterall. i'll be doggone!

Kobojunkie:
@Poster, there is a better Job market in the US today than you will be able to find in Nigeria for the next 20 years to come. Remember a couple of months ago when Stadiums around the country, Nigeria were filled to bursting with people paying N1500 to apply for jobs with the Drug Agency?

@Poster, I suggest you USE YOUR HEAD. For those of us from other countries, there is that notion that we have a place to go back to, and this is true but we also tend to forget what brought us out in the first place.[b] For years, I too felt nothing was going to work for me here, and that I needed to head back to Nigeria. I literally walked around with this gloomy outlook for years, until I started working on seeing that around me, and only then was I, not only able to get the right answers for my situation but solutions. [/b]So, thank God you are here, now, if you can, network with others who are already here to to see if you can find that one person who has been through what you are going through now and come out victorious in the end. If you are dealing with Immigration stress, I can tell you that only a couple of weeks ago, a lady, who had been illegal for about 8 years, finally got her green card. Another one, who had been trying for over a decade, got hers late last year, and this was after a lawyer in Nigeria helped her with the processing and directions she needed. I am not myself familiar with the struggle and how hard it is but if you are in similar situation, I could get you the information for these and many others who could maybe advice you on a thing or two you may not know now.

[quote author=eku_bear link=topic=589689.msg7579032#msg7579032 date=1295645492]Well, let's hear what her plan is if she goes to Nigeria. If she has some high-paying job already lined up there, then fine.[/quote]Bear, Are you grouchy today?

P.S.: Never mind. I just saw your profile pic. That is one moody bear. Anyway, you can be grouchy with me, I'll still adopt you as my bro.  No worries.

I'd like to know how the poster is doing.  Fill us in sometime, ok?

[quote author=eku_bear link=topic=589689.msg7578651#msg7578651 date=1295641581]Another option is marriage.[/quote]Are you gonna marry her?  

Very good thought-out response on your part.  Almost made me change my opinion.  But I'm not budging!

Anyway, I based my recommendation on what I got from her posts.  I could type a long missive but succintly, for her and a lot of people, I think it's the right thing.  Time flies when you're waiting for crud to turn to gold.  The only positive is the fact she was able to save $13k working the sort of jobs described in the time stated.

P.S.: Just wanted to add that even if "there are no jobs" in Naija, maybe our poster wants to setup her own small business, hence the money saved.

buzugee:
best ever advice yet. and the person is a 'she' ? please dont spend your fertile and beautiful years in misery in america like so many nigerian women do. before they know it they are over 30, angry, no longer attractive, husbandless and irate in america. i see em in chicago all the time 

Somehow I concluded she is a "she."  Now, I don't recall where she/he acknowledged that.  Probably a subconscious gender bias on my part, based on her emotive language.

Buzugee or Badagry or whatever you call yourself. I'm gonna rake you over the coals for your not-so-subtle misogynistic "utterances" one day when I'm feeling up to kicking some butt, ok? We'll meet again. 

grafikdon:
Let me give you a more believable Mapomeji rendition:

"Look I have post maps to explain how Yoruba, Edo, Bendle and Byelsa will be remove to Benin Republic. This is the only way to give North Majority and avoid civil war. See Jonathan is omo ale because he want 15,000000 to die in civil war. The North will become minority if you do not remove Yoruba, Bendle and Bayelsa to Benin republic. look the North is finish because they are now minority. See map. Map show that my village has about 100 million people and is more populated than Imo and Abia, my village has one local government while Imo and Abia has 50, this wickedness and Jesus and the Bible  says something specific about act of wickedness. Do you not want to save 15,000000 life? Give North majority by removing Yoruba, Bendle and Bayelsa to Benin Republic"

- Becomerich, The Alaafin of Canada.

Jarus:
grafikdo, who are you? who is your father? you dont know me, you dont know map. in fat my 3 yaer old son know map more you. you are illistarete, i know you, you are beaf.
see map. i finish from unilorin, jonathan come to canada and earthquake happen. what does that tells you? they know me very well, if i was president, i wil remove edo, delta, bayelsa and join with benin republis. who are you, you have bribe seun, i know, hausa is the owner of nairaland, becoause one hausa man is playing with your kini, you say we shoud not join benin republic. come to canada and see me, they want to kill me but i speak to god. see map

lol.  PRICELESS.

Subscribing. Will comment later.

oldbende:
I always think of going back to Nigeria , The stress here is just too much  maybe am not strong enough, meanwhile I open this topic to some of my friends, I called every body on my phone book to ask them if they think about the stress here or if the even felt the stress at all but was surprise to know that almost every body is tired of this country but just want to be regarded by people in Nigeria as one who lives in the states.

So I live in North Carolina for three years now and want to move back to Nigeria  with my little savings at least 2 Million Naira, do you guys think I'm running mad, [/b]I'm getting ready to purchase my ticket but I need to make sure am not making any mistake that's why I bring this topic here.

[quote author=eku_bear link=topic=589689.msg7573674#msg7573674 date=1295587177]At the very least, [b]get permanent residency/citizenship first before you leave so that if things don't work out in naija you have an escape plan/some flexibility.

Doesn't make sense to leave the US in haste. Act in haste and you'll regret in leisure  [/quote]If she is already out of status or without papers, it will be a long and arduous process to re-legitimize.  Her older posts indicate such.  Fact is the widespresd adoption of e-Verify by many states and private businesses plus the non-existent job market really does not bode well for someone in her situation.  And I can see why she is in the predicament.  Plus she is already terribly unhappy due to limited social and familial support network.

Poster,
this is an unpopular opinion here, but you really should follow your instinct and move back before you lose your mind.  I typed up a reply but held off, but once I read all your 12 posts on NL, I am convinced you are doing the right thing.  Another 3 years from now, you might be even worse off.  I don't see spineless gutless Obama (or congress) forcing through an immigration amnesty, which he promised, anytime soon.  That's at least another 2 years.  Even if they did, it may not cover those who have been in the US less than 5 years.

I'm not being pessimistic.  I just want you to do what is right for you, all of us strangers' advice notwithstanding.

[quote author=Ileke-IdI link=topic=589851.msg7573482#msg7573482 date=1295579562] "

black boys dont have freckles, so let's replace that with big bubbly acne spots  [/quote]bwahahahahaha.! Fits! hahaha. my face is starting to hurt from laughing.

[quote author=Ileke-IdI link=topic=589851.msg7573466#msg7573466 date=1295579083]fstranger is in his teens.

Just imagine a chubby cheek boy with knee-high shorts, belt up to his midriff. . . .a play boy book in one hand, a large ranboy lolipop in another. [/quote]Hahahahahaha.  What are you doing to me?  You're a hot mess, as the akatas say.

Put some freckles on his face too. 

And a clueless look on his face.  hahahaha.

I think Becomrich doesn't have the whole response/interacting thing down yet.  He's still in the presentation phase.  He wants to post his ideas but not really receptive to or ready to explain anything yet. 

Ileke,
He was just trying to say that banks will give you a loan to buy a house as a college graduate - and some people graduate at 20, 21. I understand what he was saying, even if he wasn't artful about it.

P.S. Ileke, I think he just mentioned his name because he is someone most people know had graduated by 21.

fstranger1:
Isale_gan,

You owe me a lap dance!

I told ya

OMG. I'm scandalized associating with the likes of you!  I made a big mistake!  Where is DK?  I'm gonna go run after him. 'Scuze me a minute.

P.S.: This is Becomrich's thread.  We better not turn it into something else. 

fstranger1:
You'd better stop indulging him before he starts posting his demented maps all over the damn thread!

Ha!  Here comes pictures!  Giant ones.  We forgot about the pictures.

fstranger1:
You'd better stop indulging him before he starts posting his demented maps all over the damn thread!

There's only a small chance he'll answer me anyway.  He's still composing his epic.