₦airaland Forum

ARareGem:
Someone get me a plate of roasted snake guts

hehe. .roasted snake-chips don finish oh. Hot on our menu today is barbecued lizard and goat intestine sauce. Should I?

and a bottle of Amarula, please.

*serves her the sexy bottle of Amarula*

*grabs a chair and dumps my arse there*

Nebulae:
*_{nibbling one shrimp after another.}, *
Corrrrr. . . You must tell me whatya put in these babies! They're ey-way-leh-able.
About the peppersoup. . . Catfish.
Thanks sugar.

[color=indigo]you're welcome, coffee[/color]

Ha!

Yes.
Do you bedwet?

^
I've given up taking you to the hospital. The doctor now thinks I am also a patient. _{*just kidding*}

^
I've given up taking you to the hospital. The doctor now thinks I am also a patient. _{*just kidding*}

Mr--Why:
@Jackpot

Is that a justification and the best you can offer?

Besides, is there a word called "harrassingly" Mr Lecturer?

harassingly is what I wrote and yes it's an English word. Why are you getting silly erections easily?
Come on guy, which planet do you come from?

^then nobody is indecent from your definition cos everybody has a bad past.
So, if I bed a girl the first time, then she played me? Hehe. No, I don't wanna believe that, Sir

^Useful? That uncontrollable pencil that he self-services and dangles and entice them grandma's at a certain fee?

MRbrownJAY:
let me educate you a minute bro:
no DECENT woman will fukc a stranger, no DECENT woman will meet you now and fukc you straight after the introduction, NONE!
i think the first thing you must do is understand that there are many wolves in sheep costumes out there (aka skanks who pretend to be decent women). any woman who will go to bed with you in this instance, will do so because she is "open minded" like that. . . . . . .  .and although there is nothing wrong with that, she surely aint someone you will describe as DECENT (especially if everyone had her on the first date).

the fact that a man "has the gift" or not is irrelevant here because, if she is willing to do it but doesnt because the guy didnt say the right words, it wont change the fact about WHAT KIND OF WOMAN SHE IS!

she may not be willing to do it but guess it boils down to your ability to mesmerize her. You've ever heard of the word "bargaining power"?
The first step is make her feel at home. Then, take it up from there. You too have to feel at home even though you're at home. Compose yourself. Make use of every presenting opportunity. Don't be caught off-guard cos some people are always caught unawares like excusing oneself to go and buy "rubber" outside.

here is a simple clue for you: if your future wife told you that she fukced men on the first date (after the introduction), would you still qualify her as "decent"?! lol

lol, i may call it off of course. I think the rule here is "don't ask, don't tell." Everybody has an ugly past, innit?


Every decent lady has an off day! That single sexcapade/promiscuity doesn't make her indecent. It's as simple as that.

**calls him out like a pet dog**

Guapo Guapo, catch that

**throws out a bone**

*picks my briefcase and walks out of thread, disappointed*

MRbrownJAY:
i was gonna spend the next 30mins read that long assss exposé but then i saw the below bolded point:


how can any sane man expect to go past the introduction stage and STRAIGHT into bed?! only a delusional person or someone meeting a hooker.

I disagree. Even if she's a decent lady and you know your onions well, say the right words at the right time (there & then), and off she goes like a deck of cards. Not everybody has that gift though.

[color=indigo]Get married to her and all those big sexy butt would be yours to smack. . .as you want it. [/color]

[color=indigo]er, another thing cousin B. . .
you fit reverse your Escalade and jam El Guapo's left leg for me?
Don't worry about consequences; I have SANs on me payroll. [/color]

^
[color=indigo]yes oh. I'll print the invitation cards for them and you'll help me deliver them.



*brings out a cigar, lights it up and blows some smokes towards El Guapo's face!* [/color]

^
I'll have to invite great dignitaries like my friend Prince Francis of Paris, King of Scotland, Empress Mai of Malaysia, etc. .and not forgetting all you wonderful peoples!

So, you see it'll take time before the ceremony actually holds so that they can all attend.

Nebulae:
Alright sugar,

Fried shrimp it is with that fiery peppersoup on the double.
It's a raining oxen out there man.
*_{Makes herself comfortable}*

Serves her 2 bottle plates of fried shrimps!

Er. .sexy hips, which kind of pepper-soup? We've goat-head, sheep-head and lizard-head pepper-soup.

*takes time to 'observe' the fine creature before me. .her lip-gloss & mascara, that killer waist, those 2 pointed cones on her upper abdominal region. .remembers I'm still at work. .tries to focus. .*
er which one, miss?

Mai-suya:
See me see wahala, So u did not see NO in the whole sentence it's only the suya part saw

Btw I said I want to share experience with other lecturers not to answer question from journalists,

I'm in Mathematics. We're resuming very soon. Courses already assigned and I'm making notes now.

jlegemah:
Please do any one in d house have an idea 4 lecturing job vacancy in any institution.

Federal College of Education, Kontagora Niger State. www.fcekg.com

Federal Polytechnic Ado-Ekiti.

Hope this helps.

FEMARY:
How much do lecturers earn in nigeria universities(public/private).

be specific. Which cadre?

Samunosuke:
Just want to know (on average) how much lecturers earn.In particular,a Professor who has been H.O.D. and Dean of Engineering.Thanks all.

sorry, but are you targetting a Prof to kidnap?
How much to demand as a ransom?

moremi2008:
Why do lecturers like harassing young girls?

because they dress harassingly.
Next!

Finally! Where my fellow Maths Teachers at? Rare species. . .

ARareGem:

what's the problem, sissy? Them kidnap your purse?

^cow wings is still on fire now. It'll be done in 45 minutes. Meanwhile lemme serve you the drink.

**brings a bottle of Satzenbrau, looks for opener for 2 mins. .then gives up**

bros me, er. .you fit use your teeth open am first.

Efemena_xy:
why the blank pic?

abeg just face your front and continue to dey waka away jor!

er. . no - actually since I don arrive, can I have my usual pls?

1 Devil on Horseback and a shot of Bloody Mary. . .

^that was the smell from the Bar Kitchen. I thought you've taken melicine for your catarrh

Nebulae:
Yo!
Word from tri- sis says you serve fried shrimp?

welcome, sexy eyes.
yes oh. . .we serve them: hot ones

El Guapo:
That got me wondering, do they actually serve meals at bars?

come on, those cuisines go with drinks. .kind of kpomo & booze. Need I explain more? But wait. . .what's that your years age?

^You shouldn't underestimate me! I went to School! Lol

^boy, when will you get tired of sniffing people's butt?

Efemena_xy:
*** Snatches her hand from him. . . and slaps him hard on his face!!***

hell hath no fury like a lady scorned

Na ashewo you dey find - not Efe  

asha wetin? No oh. . .it's you Efe.

but thanks for the offer - my answer is a firm No.

[flash=200,200]http://www.youtube.com/embed/6nr8hPnZfMU?rel=0" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>[/flash]

^

Efemena_xy:
^^ Shut up El!

Efemena_xy:
Nope, I'd long given up listening to the rantings of nland's demented lunatic El . . .

verily, i tell you, his song resembles that of an irredeemable mad man picking 'properties' from garbage heaps and humming some alien tunes

sylve11:
, the reason i don't coming here, besides, where's lysabello?

You disappoint me with your clap crap grammar, Sir.
You of all grey-headed people!

Meklex:
Dgunners maybe your right, but still no beard yet, am dying to have it,

[color=indigo]after a clean bath, rub some spirit or ethanol (kai-kai) on the desired region. Verily only 3 days and beards'll sprout out there! [/color]

firestar:

^[color=indigo]Er. . .madam, worry not, we also have wide variety of continental dishes to chose from:
fried shrimps,
roasted lizard eggs,
spiced snake steaks,
duck-flavored lemonades,
snail barbecue and
fresh gizzard sauce, etc.

you don't find those special dishes just anywhere!!! [/color]