₦airaland Forum

Gay alert!!! op get tendencies

The tribe says it all. yoloba people!

PunkyVeer:
Yo mama.

my mama dey school dey lecture while ur mama dey count ceiling for her brothell room. fuuuuuuuuu yeye still dey smell.

misspicy:
Finally i saw a reasonable post on my over 50 mentions, yea,it was a joke n can be classified as joke of the year

5 orijins for you sir

yeye dey smell. you be okpa, d one weh get vegetables inside, as in u be compound mumu

PunkyVeer:
Even I make light of my own "situations" because life is too short (no pun intended). This is hardly a one way ticket to therapy, so spare me the lecture

yeye dey smell. another ill-mannered biitch

rocking my z10. passport on d way

holahmihdeh:
Nonsense! What are the Igbos thinking sef? Akure is not a "No Man's Land" they should respect the Yoruba culture

shut up!!!

Mine was taking my girl n her friend to the beach in school. My boxer was kinda transparent so I bought another one at d beach there not knowing that d boxers pee hole was bad. Omo as I was teaching my babe how to swim na im my di(k pop out. Come see laugh. Her friend n some other girls just dey laugh like mad people. Though my girlfriend no notice d embarrassment but her friend fit give her d tory for house. Since that day anytime I n my girlfriends friend come across, she burst out laughing. The fair bitch won't just give me a break.

Redlyn:
For all you know they are in your heaven and y'all are still here on earth. Who's laughing now.

. Pls don't make stupid assumptions.

frank317:
U Christians are so funny... U are like the 50th person to post this same fake shhiit on this section.

Once you see anything that excites ya all about your non existent God you quickly post without thinking it through or researching.

Now I get it... Christians live forever. You need the death of just a few unbelievers to prove your God exists. So the death of a pastor proves what? Your God is dead?

. Beware of your utterances young man, don't annoy God pls.

John Lennon (Singer):
Some years ago, during his interview with an
American Magazine, he said:
'Christianity will end, it will disappear.
I do not have to argue about that.. I am certain.
Jesus was ok, but his subjects were too simple, today
we are more famous than Him' (1966).
Lennon, after saying that the Beatles were more
famous than Jesus Christ, was shot six times.
Tancredo Neves (President of Brazil ):
During the Presidential campaign, he said if he got
500,000 votes from his party, not even God would
remove him from Presidency.
Sure he got the votes, but he got sick a day before his
inauguration as President and he died.
Cazuza (Bi-sexual Brazilian composer, singer and
poet):
During A show in Canecio ( Rio de Janeiro ),
while smoking his cigarette, he puffed out some
smoke into the air and said:
'God, that's for you.'
He died at the age of 32 of LUNG CANCER in a
horrible manner.
The man who built the Titanic
After the construction of the Cruise Ship, Titanic, a
reporter asked him how safe the Titanic would be.
With an ironic tone he said:
'Not even God can sink it'
The result: I think you all know what happened to the
Titanic
Marilyn Monroe (Actress)
She was visited by Billy Graham during a
presentation of a show.
He said the Spirit of God had sent him to preach to
her.
After hearing what the Preacher had to say, she said:
'I don't need your Jesus'.
A week later, she was found dead in her apartment
Bon Scott (Singer)
The ex-vocalist of the AC/DC. On one of his 1979
songs he sang:
'Don't stop me; I'm going down all the way, down the
highway to hell'.
On the 19th of February 1980, Bon Scott was found
dead, he had been choked by his own vomit.
Campinas (IN 2005)
In Campinas , Brazil, a group of friends, drunk, went
to pick up a friend.....
The mother accompanied her to the car and was so
worried about the drunkenness of her friends and
she said to the daughter holding her hand, who was
already seated in the car:
'My Daughter, Go With God And May He Protect You.'
She responded: 'Only If He (God) Travels In The
Trunk, 'Cause Inside Here.....It's Already Full '
Hours later, news came that they had been involved
in a fatal accident, everyone had died.
The car could not be recognized what type of car it
had been, but surprisingly, the trunk was intact.
The police said there was no way the trunk could
have remained intact.
To their surprise, inside the trunk was a crate of
eggs, none was broken
Christine Hewitt (Jamaican Journalist and entertainer)
said the Bible (Word of God) was the worst book ever
written.
In June 2006 she was found burnt beyond recognition
in her motor vehicle.
Many more important people have forgotten that
there is no other name that was given so much
authority as the name of Jesus.
Many have died, but only Jesus died and rose again,
and he is still alive....
"J-E-S-U-S"
PS: If it was a joke, you would have sent it to
everyone.
So, are you going to have the courage to send this?.
I have done my part.
Jesus said:
'If you are embarrassed about me, I will also be
embarrassed about you before my father.'
You are my 8 in 8 seconds.
I am not breaking this..
No way!
Just repeat this prayer and see how God moves!!
'Lord, I love you and I need you, come into my heart,
and bless me, my family, my home, and my friends,
in Jesus' name. Amen.'
Pass this message to 8 people {EXCEPT YOU AND
ME}.....You will receive a miracle tomorrow.
I Hope you don't neglect it.

A good lesson to learn on arrogance from the story
of Late Bode Thomas:
Bode Thomas whom street was named after
@Surulere, died on Nov 23,
1953 in a most mysterious manner. Bode Thomas
was born to a wealthy
trader, John thomas in 1918. Himself, FRA Williams
and Remi Fani-Kayode (Father of Femi Fani-Kayode)
attended Law School in London, and jointly
established the first law firm
in Nigeria called "Thomas, Williams & Kayode". The
law firm was
established in Jankara Lagos. Bode Thomas was an
excellent lawyer, but
also very arrogant. Because of
his education, he was made chairman of the Oyo
Divisional Council at one time while Alaafin Adeyemi
of Oyo (father of the current Alaafin) was a
mere member! On Bode Thomas' first appearance in
council after being
appointed chairman, all council members stood up
for him in deference, to
welcome him, except Oba Adeyemi, who, for cultural
reasons, should not
show deference to anyone in public, not even his
mother! Bode Thomas
rudely shouted at the King "...WHY WERE YOU
SITTING WHEN I WALKED IN? YOU DON'T KNOW
HOW TO SHOW RESPECT?" Then, Bode Thomas was
34 years while Alaafin was in his 60s. The Alaafin
felt very insulted and said "SE EMI LO NGBO MO
BAUN?" (Is it me you are
barking at like that?) Bode Thomas responded by
shouting in vocabularies
which Alaafin didn't understand, so Alaafin just told
him... "MA GBO
LO" (continue barking). This was on November 22,
1953. Bode Thomas
got home and started barking! He barked, barked and
continued barking like dog all night until he died in
the early morning of November 23,
1953. Bode Thomas was the Balogun of Oyo. So,
when next you drive on
Bode Thomas street in Surulere Lagos, note the man
who cut short his life
due to arrogance and naughtiness
FREE to SHARE
*****************
There's no safety outside of God.

Tallesty1:
I no wan born snake oga.






https://www.freesmileys.org/smileys/smiley-happy023.gif

. How tall are u?

No. Your dad is a criminal and we cannot allow a criminal to rule our great country.

annita19:
Oh shut up with all the curse bs. He was just trolling just like many of you hypocrites do here. He apologized and moved on.

i swear u be okpa, the one weh get vegetable inside

juianne95:
u b moimoi d one wey get egg inside

. See your uncle bellow

juianne95:
Wots ur job if not to provide tins..mind u,its minor tins(like credit) that counts

. You be okpa... The one weh get vege inside

2baba don dey smoke igbo

omokugbor4real:
Any Quantity Surveying student online, should pls tell me the numbers of year their course of study takes in minna. Its very important pls

. Its 5yrs

Gen.Muhammadu Buhari. Sir, let us examine
your service records. I consider your
generation a very privileged one, indeed. In
1975 at the age of 33, you were appointed
the Military Governor of the North-Eastern
State, present day Borno & Yobe states. In
1976 at the age of 34 you became the
Minister for Petroleum and Natural
Resources. In 1978 at the age of 36 you
became the Chairman of the Nigeria
National Petroleum Corporation (NNPC).
Today the reverse is the case. Most
Nigerians at age of 35 are still unemployed
and still living with parents. Many are still
not married. During your time you were
already Governor at this age. One major
reason for this unfortunate turn of events is
that many elders like you have refused to
voluntarily handover the baton to the next
generation. Life should be a relay race
where one runs his race and hands over to
the next. In Nigeria many elders like you
have run their races and are still holding on
tenaciously to the baton. But Sir, I have an
important question here for you. The
question is simple, MUST YOU SERVE
NIGERIA AS A PRESIDENT ONLY? IS THERE
NO OTHER CAPACITY YOU CAN SERVE US
EXCEPT THE PRESIDENCY? It is very
erroneous to imagine that you can only
serve Nigeria only in one capacity. During
the regime of late General Sani Abacha, you
accepted the appointment to serve as the
Chairman of the then Petroleum Trust Fund
PTF. The general opinion was that you
served faithfully in this capacity. Well done
Sir! But you never asked Abacha to vacate
office for you as your former subordinate in
the army. Never! In fact that would have
been a dangerous move, if not suicidal.
Rather you served faithfully under your
former junior in the army. Sir, imagine if you
take on another job like the Chairman of
EFCC or ICPC or NDLEA. Nigerians actually
need you to serve in one of these capacities
much more than they need you in the
Presidency. Mere mentioning your name as
Chairman of EFCC would drive many corrupt
men underground. But you wouldn’t . Either
the Presidency or nothing. When are you
going to handover to the next person? It is
either you do it voluntarily or risk disgrace
at the polls. In 1983 at the age of 41, you
became the Head of State. Most Nigerians
in my age have not had the opportunity to
serve, but we still remain committed to the
Nigerian project. You should rather be
graceful to God and to Nigerians for the
numerous opportunities that have come
your way to serve Nigerians. Others are
begging for just one opportunity to serve.
Sir, you have to accept the stark reality on
ground that you have served your time
already. That is life for you. You run the
race, you handover the baton for others to
run, you cannot hold on to the baton more
than is necessary. As a former head of State
you are already a member of the Council of
State Meeting. You have every avenue to
channel your views across. You don’t
necessarily have to be in a frontline role,
you can serve in an advisory capacity. That
is still service.
In conclusion, let me state that the greatest
beneficiary should you emerge candidate of
the APC would be President Jonathan. It is
crystal clear that you cannot defeat
President Jonathan in a free, fair and
credible election, even in Katsina State.
Sentiments aside, Jonathan would cruise to
a landslide victory should you emerge
candidate of the APC. In fact many political
analysts believe that President Jonathan
wants you to emerge as the APC flag bearer
in order to secure a cheap victory. In
fairness to you, any of your Children would
pose a serious challenge to Jonathan more
than yourself. I do not see Nigerians
electing a 72 year old former Head of state
to lead us in this Digital era. With due
respect to you Sir, you belong to the
Analogue age and therefore, will not fit in as
president in this digital era. This is the blunt
truth. Please do not enter the Guinness
book of world records on a negative note.
Losing four consecutive Presidential election
would not augur well for your reputation. It
is in your best interest to assume your
position as an elder statesman and allow
others to serve. Nigeria does not belong to
you alone. It belongs to us all !

Aktor365:
Omo which kind life, if u come do mistake caary dem go eatery nko. Na die o.

. Guy dem for order like say 2moro no dey. Na wetin make we cook for house.

firstEVA:
Hahaha so funny your analysis of fatima is so hilarious. But why so concerned about the food?

. we be poor students so na manage we dey manage

dechandel:
Awww
Happens that the girl was much more smarter than you.
Better luck finding a dumbo next time

. Smarter in what sense? because she brought a glutton along?

GboyegaD:
That you offered her food doesn't give you the right to abuse her friend. You felt you were smart but she proved to you she was a step ahead of your game. BTW, why did your friend not excuse Fatima out of the way? Guess, you were so concerned about the food right?

. You're right on the mark. I was concerned about the food. Bad spending = poor student = food management

Wow! Where do I start narrating this hilarious experience. I asked this gorgeous light skinned beauty out, took her phone number. I invited her to my house and she agreed without hesitation. I patted myself mentally thinking say I don land this knock-out babe. On the D-day I and my friend cooked rice and stew, fried chicken, then arrange our room wella. My friend was eager to see the gorgeous babe I described. Omo as d babe call me say make I come pick her for where I tell her make she stop. Na so my friend baf me with perfume say I need to impress the babe, the guy too like fine gals. When I got to the place I saw the stunning babe alright but she came with a friend, a very fat friend for that matter. Omo I come dey think for my mind whether this girl bring her bodyguard? I greeted the babe "Marian wow how can u be more stunning than the last time we met" omo come see blushing. "Who do we have here?" In my mind i was saying "who be this fat born fool weh this okpa gal carry come?" "Oh sorry, paul meet my friend her name is fatima" Are u kidding me? Her mama know say she go fat like this before she give her FATIMA? I said that in my mind. "fatima its nice to meet u" I no like as u come at all. I said in my mind. "Same here". "Ok babe let me take u to my house". As we were going to my house, the 'fatima' followed suit. I didn't need to be a rocket scientist to know that the 'fatima' is a glutton. So I was forced to ask marian "is she coming with us?" "Yes off course she is my close friend'' "ok no problemo" Big problem dey o! As we got to my house, I could see that my friend was impressed with marian judging by the look on his face. But that changed when he saw fatima. As I was introducing them to my friend the next thing I heard was "what is cooking?" You can guess who asked that question. I said in my mind "shey na your mama put the food for fire?" Where are the drinks? Marian asked. Yeh! Our pot of rice and drinks don finish today! "We cooked rice and chicken". I said. "Wow that is so romatic, I love guys who can cook" the glutton said. romatic kwa, love ke, I hope say no be me u dey love. Ha! Paulo stiles don suffer". My mind was saying. I asked them their choice of drink. Marian said stout, the next thing I heard from the glutton was gulder. No wonder she get big belle. When food was served, come see massacre, see as the glutton dey tear chicken, chicken weh she no buy. E just be like say them starve come. I swear that glutton can eat a whole horse. When they finished eating the next thing that I heard was "pls more" this glutton na oliver twist o, she want more after full plate of rice weh we serve." I said in mind. No shame, no self-respect just food. I gave the stunner credit here, atleast she didn't ask for more. How she got to be the glutton friend baffles me. They are opposites. One is a cutie the other is an elephant. After the glutton finished her second plate of food. She took a gulder and drank it all in one gulp. She took another and nursed that. The cutie nursed her stout. We dey there dey look with shock. No be our eye we use style discharge them before them start to dey order for more. On their way leaving the glutton said "marian your boyfriend can cook very well, tell him we will come again next week" we go don park comot, no be us una go meet. When I came back from escorting them out. My friend said ''stiles na gods of food u go carry come o, no be babes". "Guy no be lie o. I no get luck this time". So guys have u come across food eating machines like this?

NYSC!!! I dey do press-up for u

Guy you fall my hand.... Why you go marry this tooth pick

I'm busy here studying in france and u pple are telling me rubbish!

Very soon we go see a nairalander cooking human being. Na over feeding dey cause all this things.

A thrice encounter is enough for me to call it quit. Why I go put myself for that kind work? I dey craze??

EvilSeeed:
Guy!!

Abeg Vote TemiGracie Join abeg.

. Shuu! Why u carry this TemiGracie for head self? U be her campaign manager?