₦airaland Forum

Depends on where there you are. My bro is in Cape town and as far as I know he mos def fits the "Good Nigeria brother" description. I would know, I guess I was a good influence on him. haha. holla back and lemme know ur bio and if I can/should hook u 2 up.

The fires are not only limited to Lagos/Nigeria, but I think there have been a few major fires the world over: In Germany where that baby was thrown from a 4 story building, in the US during super tuesday, and a few others. The sad part is that there will be many such major fires this year The cause? It has something to do with astrology and the planet Mars being close to the earth or something. A friend of mine who studies/practices astrology predicted it would be so and all these fires are proving him right.

Of course the mention of Astrology and it's seeming 'non-relevance' to fire outbreaks will sound stupid/absurd to most people, but those who know it know it. The major question/issue is not that fire fighters in lagos/nigeria just about don't exist, or that people don't do more to prevent fires, or bad kerosine, or any other such reasons you give, those are valid reasons no doubt, but the "root cause" is what we need to find out, and someone has linked this root cause in Astrology. Anyone else has a valid/logical/sensible explanation, especially those who will rubbish this astrology theory?

Can anyone here please give me the correct phone number of Federal Min of Education Abuja? The # given on their website doesn't go through and I've sent several mails to the address on their site. Or maybe you know someone who works there? that would be good enough too.

Thanks anyone.

", Please don't blame me in just taking the bulls by the horn." if only more women would do more of this statement with regards the subject matter, they would be so much better off for it. Alas they would rather live by "misguided" notions.

Well myomy, your last post made me do this, I would normally have a few questions to ask but I guess that can wait, if at all. View my posts on NL and if they seem like coming from someone who might be worth your while, then check my profile to see how to get in touch.

Baffles me why you "need" to know me in person. It's either you can help or not.
And it's either you know the answers to my questions or not. It's your call.

Howdy,

Does anyone here work at Afribank? Or can you refer me to someone who works at
Afribank? I need some info general info like org structure, principal officers, etc etc.

Thanks for any help.

Well I'm feeling a little 'bold' at the mo' and that's why I'm willing to do this.

I'm looking to meet/make friends with a woman who's between the ages
of 38 and 45. Preferably located in Lagos, but otherwise located in Nigeria.
It's a 101% no strings attached friendship (possibly even an e-friendship.)
Nothing more.

My reason? The best relationships I've had in the few years I've been online
have been with women in that age bracket. Most memorable among these
relationships has been my 2+ year friendship with my 46 yr old lady friend
in Canada. And another with a 43 yr old dutch woman. Not sure exactly how
to describe it, but there's somewhat of this mature, mutual respect that exists.
There's also the stimulating conversations, that perhaps stems from the flow of wisdom
'downwards', that I have with my friends that makes me always want to talk 2 them
and enjoy their company.

HOWEVER, I sometimes think that my relationships with these 2 women is as good as
it is mainly because there is en element of "culture" involved. For example, there isn't
that need to say "good afternoon" (in the respectful way) the way I would to a Nigerian/African
woman of that age. Perhaps a few more of such issues and examples. What I'm trying to do here
is basically see if I can have as good a relationship with a Nigerian woman with the same age
statistics as I do with my friends from beyond these shores.

My Bio: All I will say about my bio here is that I'm in my late 20's. And also to have a 'feel'
of my personality, so to speak, just browse through my past posts on Nairaland to get a feel
of how I think and talk. You can of course contact me to ask me questions about me.

Again, if this sounds interesting to you, or if you know someone who you think fits the
profile, please be reminded that even if you have a child as old or older than I am, married
or single, I will think of and refer to you as nothing but my friend and at such will talk to and act in
that way around you.

So if you will, respond here and give me a way to contact you, or you can send me an
email to m_kanayo2020 at yahoo dot com

Phew, I did it. LOL.

If I may add, if you are willing to read a few articles on the link I gave above,
you can start with this one: http://www.rosicrucian.com/zineen/magen203.htm
and possibly this: http://www.rosicrucian.com/zineen/rebirth.htm
which talks about the theory of rebirth which is one of the most common of their
doctrines that people know about. Now, if this was my first time of hearing about
reincarnation, and I read that article, it surely will give me food for thought, and since
they give Bible passages to prove what they say, I will be more likely to accept it as a
possiblity. However, what argument have our 'everyday' churches given to prove or
rubbish the theory of reincarnation? NONE. All they say is that it there is no such thing,
end of story. Where as the rosicrucians say it exists and gives you some proof.

There are many many such instances where they give a doctrine and either try to prove it
in the Bible or in any other way, rather than ask you to accept it as a finality.

Another one I like is the topic of healing. Our churches, especially the penticostal/new
generation churches teach us that God does not wat us to be sick, and the "devil is
a liar" and such statements. How often do you hear them say that God does not want
you to abuse your body, by eating bad foods, or thinking bad, evil thoughts, etc.
All that happens is that you fall ill, for example cancer as a result of smoking, and
they ask you to come for healing and miracle service. While miracles do happen and
all, the rosicrucians will counsel you and caution you on your lifestyle before or while
they try to heal you. I can go on and on, but better than that read for yourself.

Ndipe:
My take is this, what's the belief of the rosicrucians? is it attuned to the beliefs of Christianity? Do they believe in the existence of God, (and I just don't mean a "higher power" as some organizations are apt to term it that way. Do they believe in the physical death of Jesus Christ, as well as His Bodily Resurrection? What is your take on this@k9?

Yes their beliefs are attuned to the christian beliefs. Yes they believe in God,
and it makes no difference how they call Him, different religions refer to God
by different names. In my opinion, those who refer to God as higher Power
are just trying to tow the line of "neutrality." For example, in a congregation
of muslims and christians and Hindus, etc. How would you refer to God when
all these people call Him by different names. If you call God, the muslims and
others could very easily take it you are not referring to their God, just on the
basis of name. That is my most simplistic explanation.

Yes they believe in the physical death of Jesus Christ and His resurrection.
BUT and this is perhaps one of the things that makes their ways resonate
with me. They don't just tell you something and ask you to believe it line and
sinker. They want you to experience these things yourself, which is very different
from what our churches teach us, including my catholic church. I have found
this to be the same with Hinduism.

When they tell you about karma, they tell you the hows, and why's, and give
you examples to try prove it to you. For example, when my catholic church talks
about purgatory, they ask me to take it as a finality with no further explantion.
When the rosicrucians talk about purgatory, they go deeper to explain it from
a different perspective, and by so doing, you have a chance of believing it
heart and soul because it "makes sense" to you, not because someone said so.
I should also state that their doctrine is somewhat a combination of science and religion,
if I can put it that way. In other words, many of the things that say can be verified
by scientific means, so that for the lay man, when faith and belief alone is not enough or
won't do the job, you can get your answers from a scientific standpoint. But then again, I'm
probably not explaining it in the best of ways.

I challenge anybody who is open minded and willing to grow. Simply visit their website
and read some of their articles, and see if you will see anything evil. For example read
some of the articles on this webpage: http://www.rosicrucian.com/zineen/pamentoc.htm
and see if you won't find at least one article that will make sense to you and that you
will learn something valuable from it. Again, remember that some of the things you will read
may sound like outright rubbish, but then again, a scientist talking to farmer will be talking
rubbish, but all the scientist has to do is take the farmer to his lab and let him watch you turn
air into water for example.

Now I just gotta add my voice to this. The only person who has said
anything meaningful is grafikdon.

This is my take on the matter: It has been said that people usually criticize
what they don't know and understand. In this case, and in the Nigerian/African
setting, the word occult has been so 'stigmatized' and smeared that it can easily
pass as a synonym for evil. Well I was as ignorant as many of you guys in the not too
distant past. I will have you know that I was born and raised in a catholic family and
my mother is one of those people they refer as being more catholic than the pope.
The message there is that because of my religious upbringing, such words/people as
"occults" were the same as evil/devils to me. Until I "saw the light," to put it in the
words of my "born again" christian brothers and sisters, especially those who left their
church and went to another. I "saw the light" when I started to read books from other
religions/denominations, INCLUDING books by so called occultists. I will probably always
consider myself a catholic, even if I stopped attending a catholic church today.

I have read a variety of books from other religions- hinduism, occult (including books by
rosicrucians), etc, and other non-religious book, and regarding the rosicricians I can tell
you authoritatively that there is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING evil about them. For those
of you who say they are an evil group, have you personally experienced or read
(as against HEARING) anything that suggests they are an evil group? I can guarantee
that all your comments are based on what u have heard, and as I'm sure you know,
and as grafikdon has stressed, stories get distorted as they travel from one person
to the other. Take also that fact I stated earlier that people don't understand what
they don't know.

I'll give an analogy to explain the last sentence. For you non-science students, who know
nothing about Physics, do you think you would understand a thing about physics or chemistry
if people knowledgable about it were talking about it. Similarly, do you think you would
understand anything that programmers and such technical IT people would be saying
if you know nothing about the subject. Therefore until you have personally come in contact with,
and had a chance to weight for yourself, such matters as "occultism" or any religious matter
at all, it is best to hold your peace rather than negatively judge them. Or at least hold remain
impartial on the subject.

Now regarding the Rosicrucian, in all the literature I have read, I have never come across
anything negative or evil in their ways, and I have read quite some of their literature. On the
contrary, I have probably learnt more about christianity and God and being a good person
from the little I have read of, and know of them, than all my 'catholic' years. I won't bother
going into specifics here about them and their doctrine -which I might add is much more
christian and Godly than what is being taught in many many religions/denominations,
but all I will advice anyone is to refrain from negative talk about the occult and anything you
know little or nothing about for your own good.

Like grafikdon, I have also read enough about them (but not personally been with them) to
know that they have a lot of good things to teach you about christianity that you most likely
will never learn about in your church, and while youu most likely will think you would rather
not learn anything of their "evil and occult" ways, all I will say is 'you just don't know.'
Anyone who is willing to set aside their preconceived notions and beliefs about the occult,
and let reason and their prior knowledge of christianity prevail, will see that there is a lot
of similarities in their doctrines and what we are taught in churches. BUT the occult tells
you the deeper meaning of things and lets you see it in a different light.

Yes many of their doctrines may sound strange and are hard to swallow because you have never
heard of it before, or it sounds strange or it clashes with your present belief system, but is it
impossible that they may offer a different way to look at the same subject, for example the
theory of reincarnation? Even I still find many of the rosicrucian teachings to be strange,
but just because it is strange to me is no fact or argument that is it incorrect. Just like
if a scientist tells you he can turn paper to gold, does it mean it is impossible and that he
is talking crazy if you don't believe him or dont think it is possible?

But of course, there will still be many more of such (ignorant) comments as previously posted,
even in light of what I have said above. All I can do is wish such people well and hope you
see the light someday.

Nigeria (and perhaps Africa as a whole, save South Africa) does not quite have a market for such product. My guestimation is that less than 0.5 of the physically challenged populace can afford a motorized wheelchair, and of those who can, an infinitesimally small amount of them own and/or commute in a van. Perhaps when the market arrives (in another lifetime), you can then come with your product.

Just my 2 cents.

The email address also bounces from my end. The two viable options I see are going to this link: http://www.ng.celtel.com/en/about-us/careers/cv-registration/index.html and filling out the
form there. I want to assume it will go to the relevant department for this specific opening.
Alternatively you can call their customer care and hope someone can tell u the correct addy to
send it to.

That being said, while I'm not applying for the opening myself, I did help my friend draft her
CV and application. She of course got wind of it from this page. My observation, from the
sample cover letters on the site given below is this: In my humble opinion, those 'cover
letters' in the state they are in (and all its derivations) are really very poorly written and do a
very terrible job of selling yourself for a job opening. I seriously doubt that any of those letters
sent in that state will convince any employer that you are the candidate they are looking
for. The wordings of the letter just don't do it, it lacks a certain 'bite' that can give you an
advantage over other applications. Maybe I just don't know how to word what I feel is 'wrong'
with the applications.

Having said that, a little while ago, I was actually writing a little article about CV's, the types of CV'S
and what/how you can write a CV that can grab attention. But I sorta lost interest along the way.
This episode with my friend and her CV just might make me go back to finish the article. If I do
decide to finish the article, I'll try post a link in this thread linking to the article.

There's absolutely nothing to be scared of. Your fam and friends talk mainly out of ignorance and of course that's fed by the CNN's and co of this world. People travel to 'strange' lands all the time and this with no incident, and even to this land called Nigeria.

Here's my advice.

1. Do more of what you've just done here. ASK questions. People fear what they don't know. Ask any one knowledgeable in this matter. You basically want to be prepared. Better still, find a Nigerian in the states that you know relatively well and ask him/her to introduce you to a relative/friend back here they know and trust. Then take time out to question this person/get advice over the coming weeks and months.

2. See if you can find someone who has done the same thing so you can learn their experience. I believe you might find such people on this forum, otherwise you will find them in other forums.

All the best

If there's any Tennis fans or Andre Agassi hopeful (like I once was) in here, or just play for fun, and you'd like my old racket, the very last in my collection. Then you can have it for a price.

As much as it hurts to let go of it, I'd rather it be of practical use to someone else than sit around my house collecting dust like it's been doing for a while.

So if you'd like it do say so. It's a Dunlop brand, still in very good condition, only that it currently has no strings. I can send you pictures if you interested.

Yup, I totally agree with texazzpete. I would pitch my tent and say that a CV that spends as much time and space on just one section stands the risk of getting on the reviewers nerve, considering that s/he likely has thousand of CV's to review.

I would say your CV should give as brief a summary of all these finer points/qualities as possible. You have to sell your self in as little words as possible, even if the whole CV translates to 5 pages. The interview stage is where you get to go into detailed specifics.

Nice piece Ka. No doubt it will give food for thought to whoever sees this and takes a cue from it.

The two phrases can be used interchangeably, depending on what context it is being used. But when it comes to the finer points of things, they do have their differences, and individual jobs.

A plan can be a 'working' plan i.e what will guide the biz in it's day to day operation, and from an investors point of view, it is to show that his investment is secure and is being invested in a profitable biz, with all the financial figures and other elements to 'prove' it. From what I gather the original poster is asking, this is not what he seeks.

A proposal can be a proposal in the sense of the word. I.e propose a new idea to someone for whatever reason. Perhaps to chip in and add his own contribution, financial or otherwise. but it doesn't necessarily have to include elements of profitability and viability. It's not always about money. eg. I can be a musician with no money to buy studio time, I can write a business proposal to someone who has a studio, and in it, I will details and try and convince him how his investment in letting me use his studio for free will be repaid, one way or another.

Lastly, a plan and a proposal can be interwoven into one. And this is probably your best bet. You are most likely looking for funds and an investor. You have to do both in this case. Propose or sell your business idea and WHY it is a good and profitable idea, and simultaneously show HOW it will be profitable.

Sum total, a business plan/proposal is not particularly easy work, cos to write a good one takes a lot of research (presentation, facts and figures, marketing techniques, etc). if you know your business industry well enough, your work is cut considerably. The websites that have been given are great tools that can and will help you as a guide. use them wisely, and you have a much higher chance of convincing someone to part with his money. Under use it and get woeful results, just as someone who recently showed me a woefully written business plan, with which he was shopping for $3million for a major project, and asked me to find investors for him, which of course I bluntly refused.

I will say this last bit in passing for whomever it might give food for thought and inspiration. The rounds I hear is that banks and other financial houses won't give you a loan for a business if you don't have collat and even a minimum down payment. I don't doubt this and is perhaps true to a great extent, but on the other side of the coin, I dare say that the people who are looking for these funds have not shown anywhere near good enough "evidence", -read business plan/proposal, that the banks' money is being sought for a "fail" proof business. I have yet to personally test and experience this, but I strongly believe that if you have a VERY (and perhaps VERY VERY) good and convincing business plan, by the time you go to 10 or 15 banks/financial house/investors, at least one of them is bound to be willing to take the risk, even without your collat, That is my firm personal belief, It may be wrong and naive, but I hold on to it for now. In any case, I will probably be testing one such dogmatic and 'naive' beliefs of mine on a different matter soon (I have tested it once with fairly good results), and if I am proved right again and again, then I will conclude with certainty what I have just said.

All the best,

While Graphcard provides an essential and helpful service, they are nitwits nonetheless. Lousy customer care, they take your money (more like rip you off) every month just for keeping your money with them, and more. The are sort of an evil necessity. But I have paid my dues with them and will have nothing to do with them anymore.

To cash out, try open a domicilliary account with any bank and transfer your cash. Or ask them to send via western union. Or mail you a check, in which case you will still need a dom account to cash it. Those are your best options, as I'm sure it's stated on their site.

As someone said, prevention is THE keyword. Secondly, use the power of the internet to educate yourself about happenings in the field of asthma and latest findings out there. I personally don't have a lot of faith in Nigerian doctors, not because of the individual, but more of the "system" that trained them. The health care system is criminally terrible, so I would always seek a second independent opinion about any health issue, not just asthma.

HA. you people don't know half of half of what is going on out there in the world beyond our shores. Brain scan to read mind? Ha. That sounds small compared to other stuff I have read. Believe me people, we in this part of the world are soo far behind and ignorant about what the rest of the world is doing and capable of doing.

In the years that I have been online, I have read stuff that has bugled my mind, and I haven't even read half of half of it either. Sadly, we'll only keep on marveling, instead of doing our own bit, or even actively taping into their efforts, R&d, and all else, and using same to move us forward.

Too bad.

I will take this topic from a different angle, and more specifically address it to both the author of the topic and people in his shoes who feel like they do.

If you say you find it hard to trust Nigerians, perhaps only those resident in Nigeria, I put this question to you: If you were living in Nigeria, and as upright and decent as possible, don't you think other Nigerians living abroad would still see you as fraudulent and dishonest and all other qualities you ascribe to those resident in Nigeria. Your "saving grace" is basically because of your location, nothing else. Remember that you have the same "nigerian blood" running in your so you most likely have the tendency to behave like a Nigeria. It's just that simple. Non-Nigerians would almost always consider Nigerians, no matter where they reside, as the same kind of people.

Another angle, if you have blood brothers and sisters living here, that you know very well and can vouch for their uprightness, how would you feel if someone (a fellow nigerian) were to label them as you now do I'm sure it would offend you in some measure. That is probably the same way it is "offensive" to many who read your post.

I do not deny the fact that there is a truism in what you say and what many other people say and agree on, that many and perhaps very many Nigerians have fraudulent tendencies, heck I agree with you as well, and am always on my toes when I have to deal with people. But hey, so what. If we must take it from a 'nationalistic' point of view, just about every country on earth has it's own national flaw, from americans to the brits to the germans. Instead of looking at WHAT someone does look at WHY they do it. (This is not even not mentioning how bad and unjust it is to stereotype.) Understanding that will help you possibly solve the problem. But of course that really isn't your job, that belongs the government and the powers that be(parents, teachers etc).

So finally, before you cast a stone, so to speak, make sure that the stone wont come back to you. And if it just might come back to you, it is perhaps better not to throw that stone. And if you insist on throwing, be ready to face the consequences. But then again, perhaps it is ok to throw a stone at yourself, if it is meant to do an internal personal cleansing of some sort.

That's my take on the matter.

It all boils down to packaging. How you present your idea to them. and to do a thorough job, you need to be able to write a VERY good business proposal, which almost always means outsourcing the job to a firm that specializes in it.

So my advice: If you have the funds, find a professional to write out a business plan. If you don't have the funds, spend A LOT of time writing and fine-tunning your idea (there are a lot of free guides and tutorials online). But with the internet, it shouldn't be that hard and expensive to find a good business proposal writer. There is elance, freelance, and many other freelance writers.

That basically is the first and most important step key to getting your idea thru d door. once that is done, all else shouldn't be as hard if you are dedicated and stay the course. But of course, it will not be easy (as with anything worthwhile). Hence the comment, "if you stay the course."

BTW. do u wanna sell me ur idea and lets see if something can come out of it?

A question for agboifo, but chances are high that he won't see this (soon.)

Note for Admin: This is one of the arguments for private message capabilities. If I could contact who I want, then I wont have to be posting this and taking up unnecessary bandwidth, also, I am more certain to get his attention and much sooner too. So think about it if you will.


@ agboifo, if you ever get to read this, How much do you pay for your EVDO, how much did you get the equipment, do you know the areas of lagos that they have coverage? and a few other Qs I can think of to ask about starcoms internet. SHEESH, I NEED A FASTER INTERNET CONNECTION, arrrggghhhh!

WOW, I aint been on this thread in a while. Pweety interesting. Well as I might have said before, we are still a long way away from broadband in Nigeria, or at least the major cities.


After paying for DOPC equipment and 3 months service, the pricks tell me I don't have a line of sight with their base state, but if I can provide them a mast, it will work. I grudgingly buy a 70 feet mast off someone, but I insist that their engineers MUST come test their equipment on the site the mast is located before I spend more money to move it to my house. After lots of phone calls and assurances that their engineers will come for a test run, one particular Indian prick (no offense to Indians generally) tells me that the mast has be at least 120 feet. I tell the animal that your engineer who has been to my house, and who saw the particular mast in question says it would be ok. You sit your silly ass in an office and tell me crap, after I have spent my money to buy the mast. I am really fuming and mad at them and if I really want to get back them, I can very easily cause them some degree if embarrassment. Who knows, just maybe it's a blessing I won't use their service. I would sure hate to have spent so much money on something only to hate their service. That just is one of the downsides to services and costs of this nature.

For now I will just go collect my refund, i.e if they don't begin to speak 'Indian' to me, which will just be a nail on their coffin that I will be sure to do. What it ultimately means is that my hopes of getting a 'non dial-up' internet has been further delayed till heaven only knows when. ahh!

If the problem isn't the cost of equipment, some companies quote 100K for equipment (cobra net, simbanet, cyberspace), then the problem is they you are not in the companies line of sight. Na wah, we have still some road to travel with many basic's of life in this country.

No matter what any ISP tells you, chances are it is a lie, or at least not 100% correct. If starcoms evdo says they give you 300kb then it is SHARED bandwith. What it ultimately means is that if you were the only one at any point in time on that 'shared' 300kb, then you could acheive d/load speeds of 300kb, but if there are 100 pple online at the same time, then all 100 pple are sharing that same speed, and that sometimes can translate to an average of say 3kb (just a rough example). That is the same way it works with ALL ISP's, perhaps except the dial up companies as they are obviously in another league of their own. So NEVER let the d/load speed they tell you decieve you. Another thing you shuould know is the higher the bandwidth size, the higher the number of people sharing it.

My advice, always go for the cheaper of them as more expensive is no guarantee of better quality/upload time. Unless where they have established names. I would go for a DOPC than a netcom, as DOPC has been there a while and probably would have gotten their act together. And in fact I have gotten their equipment and am all set to go, but unfortunately I dont have a line of sight with their base station. Sad.

I think things will start getting better soon as far as internet, and more importantly broadband internet is concerned, as MTN and GLO round off their fibre optic backbone. When they start offering it to the public, either directly or indirectly, then prices will crash as it has already started, it will be more reliable as fibre optic is known to be than microwave.

And when all this has happened, the next step is to find the messiah that will come and crash the prices of computers in nigeria, as that is still another big hurdle to cross. Then and only then will Nigeria totally and fully start to emerge from it's internet slumber. Then you can expect more people to start actively partaking in e-commerce, and hopefuuly that will be an alternative avenue to them job men/women to look at.

Hey,

I need to ask the people in here who have or can sell/buy on ebay a question. I would rather have just contacted you via PM if that feature was available, but unfortunately it is not. So will you kindly provide me with a way to contact you. It is more of 'personal' ebay question and I'm hoping you can asnswer it. I'd be really glad if you can. So will you leave your email here for me to contact you or will you please reach me on 7929529 AT multilinks DOT com if you don't want to give out your addy in public.

I have seen a few ID's here who have indicated that they sell/buy on ebay, but there is no way to contact you, so you know yourselves , please drop me a line. I'd appreciate it a great deal.

PS** Of course there's something in it for you as I will be willing to compensate you even for the trouble of telling me you sell on ebay.

I am looking for someone who has the following skills. Preferably one person with all skills in one. But otherwise let me know which of the skills you have.

1. Knowledge of domain Hosting technicalities. All them DNS and advanced DNS zone terminologies, name servers. And everything that has to do with domain hosting and web designing. I am much more interested in the hosting part than the design part.

2. Fairly knowledgable in the use of Photoshop or Compact draw.

3. Can navigate fairly easily around the internet. Or differently put know's how to research information online.

What do I need you for? To put me through some things in 1 and 2, call it a crash course if you will. Number 3 is an additional bonus and is not a necessity.

I will pay for your services in cash or kind. or both if necessary.

This is rather urgent and I will appreciate a response as soon as possible.

Send me a mail to 7929529 AT multilinks.com and let me know if you are interested and I will tell you more.

Cheers.

PS** Forget about replying to this and leaving your phone number and asking me to call. I don't play like that. Send me a mail or at best reply to this and gimme your email addy.

I haven't read anywhere near all the posts responding the initial one, but my comment is centered on the facts as you give them. If trully that is all you did (i.e you not telling it half way or leaving out some details) and chances are high that you have left out some important details, but I shall give my opinion nonetheless.

If that is all you did -get close to an old lady friend, and talk on phone, chat (even if romantic chats) etc, then I think your wife is really silly to be talking divorce lawyer purely for these reasons, EXCUSE ME, But did she think marriage was a joke when she got into it, Had she not being hearing about what husbands and wives do to each other (cheat and all) before she married you As long as she has no proof that you were actually cheating then she is silly to talk to a divorce lawyer. She could kick you out of the house, take the kid away for a month, whatever to punish you, BUT divorce sounds just silly (AGAIN I REPEAT IF WHAT YOU SAY IS YOUR ONLY CRIME.) It could be argued that she did that in the heat of the moment, BUT COMON, DIVORCE LAWYER, of all anger tactics, puleezz,

So what if she supported you financially when you were down. is this a big deal. correct me if I am wrong but over there the term "PARTNER" is also used to refer to your wife/husband. So what's the big deal if your partner, defined (according to me) as someone who carries your burdern for and with you, who shares your joys for and with you{The opertive words are SHARE and CARRIES} , supports you when you are down? Would you have done differently if she were in your shoes? So she did not do you a favor by providing for you when you were down, it was her RESPONSIBILITY as your partner.

Well she (and perhaps you) are a product of the society you live in and that is why divorce rates are as high as they are over there. Your society allows and promotes such high divorce rates, Truth be told. If you were both here and it happened, would she seek a divorce laywer as her first option? Most probably not.

Marriage is a VERY hard institution, but 95% of people never realise this, they think it is all luvvy duvvy and all rosy all the way, My aunt once made a statement that hit me. She said she wonders what God was thinking when he instituted the sacrament of marriage. This woman has (and still is) been married over 30 years. Her premise basically was that why would he "make" people jump into a thing such as marriage seeing how difficult it can be and what it can do to people.

You are both 5 years into the marriage, I hope you are together 20 years from now and i'd like to hear how many times she had seen a laywer in the years gone by.

In my opinion, she needs a good "TALKING TO," to set her (and the many like her/you) straight. Perhaps a counsellor is good enough, but that's not the typa talking to I refer to.

Notice I centered on her faults and nothing on yours. Well that was intentional. While I can give you my piece, I'll hold my peace. The reason basically is that yes you 'fell' and you are sorry (i presume,) it would do no good for her to equally follow you into a ditch (even though she might be "justified" but that IS why you are MARRIED, and not dating. She has given up her rights (so to speak) to act in certain ways when provoked, unless she is TRULLY PROVOKED, which in my opinion and based on the facts as you state, she wasn't. I'm sure these are the things people who go to marriage counselling BEFORE marriage get taught.

All the best.

"Wow! Those prices are pretty high!", Welcome to our world. It's obvious you don't live in our world, or do you? Nah! But really where are you? First off, the major dial up services in lagos advertise 115.2 kbps as the speed they offer. but this is a hoax as the KBPS is really measured in BITS not BYTES (8 bits = 1 byte) So in actual sense they are giving us 14 kilobytes at 15K naira or $110/month, So whatcha wanna say now?, Speak up I can't hear you, Didn't think so,

So a company comes along and offers me 7K Naira for a 128 KBPS (bytes now) why won't I jump on it. Unless of course they are trying to hoodwink us like those theiving PTO ISP's. but I'm not having that. But then again even if they are, isn't that cheaper than 15K naira

Yes this is the average price of broadband in lagos, but then again there aren't that many companies in lag that offer broadband, unless some small communnity type undercover companies. the cheapest price I know for broadband is 6K, and the highest I know is 20K (and I bet my life all of them are shared bandwidth). Whenever you wanna make comparsions, NEVER compare Nigeria to any country in the west. Start from home like Ghana and co. Then you'll be fair.

Is it new for things about Nigeria or Nigerian companies to be wierd?

Arrangee? suit yourself. I only seek to help. Nothing prevented me from going solo.

Did I not say I will refer you to some one in the company? 3 months upfront sucks as well and that's why I haven't bought from the company in the past 5 months I knew they offer broadband. This price reduction was a breath of fresh air. and I'm willing to take the gamble, even though the company does have a recognizeable name

I have said my last on the issue. I have done my bit.

Peae out.

A company in lagos is offering their equipment for broadband internet at a special discount price of 40K for the month of September ONLY. 24/7 128Kbps bandwith for N7350. But you must pay for 3 months access at a time. So if you want broadband internet and have exactly 63K then send me a mail to 7929529 AT multilinks DOT com, or call 0802-3529-325 and let me know. I will only refer you to someone (my insider) in the company as the offer isn't even public. But remember this offer is for the month of SEPTEMBER ONLY and is only available in select parts of lagos where they have service (I don't know all the areas)