₦airaland Forum

Sirchiboy:
Can a woman feed a man clothe him and give him pocket money for a year
➜ and still respect him as the head of the family?

Yes, many women do that but on a whole, they don't benefit much from such arrangements, except maybe the presence of those men in their lives to serve as added validation of their claim to the Mrs. badge the women hold on to. Watch The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives for reference. 🥱🥱🥱

In The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives, some husbands are not the primary breadwinners; the women are. Many of the cast members earn significant income through their online careers, which allows their husbands to attend school or provides financial freedom for the family. While this deviates from traditional expectations where men are the primary providers, many husbands in the show are portrayed as supportive of this arrangement.

2. If respect worship is really that important to you, then make sure you never ever fall short of your contract in marriage. That is the only thing that guarantees you the worship you— you can only claim it if you continuously keep your end of the bargain — desire from the woman. 🥱🥱

RubiesBanking:
➜As per the report, the mother had doubts about the father of her kids and to confirm that she did the DNA test using the sample of the person she had thought was the father. After the test, she found that only one of her kids showed positive for the DNA test while the other one did not. "She then remembered that she had sex with a different man on the same day and when this second person took a test, it showed he was the second twin's father," says the report.

Like that she don get two baby daddies in one pregnancy. I hope none of them turns out to be a deadbeat, or else the shege fit turn real for her.

LordIsaac:
➜My brother, no matter the proof, you are joined together already. What were you thinking of when they asked you "...for better or worse...?", and you said, "I do." This is the "worse" part.

Nah! Divorce is always an option open to every married individual out there since marriage has never been by force. 🥱🥱

Omowale2023:
➜You haven't answered my question. Enough of this forth and back

You refused to read the article for yourself, yet you're trying to drag me to answer stewpid questions you harbor still as a result of obvious ignorance? Abeg, get away! 🥱🥱🥱

LordIsaac:
➜You have eventually acknowledged it...there's nothing you can do. Trust me on this completely! Except you hate peace.

I am in no way stating that it is impossible to prove.

All humans have emotions — the whole range of emotions is available in every human being out there — therefore, all humans are emotional beings.

Emotions are short-lived, intense, and direct reactions to a specific event, while moods are longer-lasting, less intense, and more generalized states of mind that may not have a clear cause. Emotions are like a fleeting spark, such as anger over a traffic jam, whereas a mood is like a continuous, low-level background feeling, such as a general sense of contentment or irritability throughout the day.

Emotions are signals, indicators of our current emotional state, a part of our motivation system. Emotions are not actions; signals/flags do not act. Rather, an individual's response to an emotion — emotional response — is indicative of low emotional intelligence. That is a problem linked to a lack in the area of regulating one's emotions.

Considering one's emotions as a form of weakness is an admission of a very low level of both emotional and social intelligence. Men are just as emotional and in some ways more emotional — they react emotionally — than most women do. This is explained by the fact that men are more prone to committing emotional crimes daily than women are.

There are so many things wrong with feeling threatened by your own emotions or thinking that subduing them makes you stronger when, in fact, it reveals you are an emotionally weak individual with nothing whole to offer others in the way of a relationship or connection.

Sirchiboy:
➜Papa ebuka you again? ?.... Why

I don't know an Ebuka, abeg!.

aalangel:
➜What's her name? Mercy...she wants to do it intentionally She's undermining the role of Daddies.

Undermining the role of fathers who have typically remained absent in the lives of children, even before this generation of their own accord?

Sirchiboy:
Male and Female Students Living in Same Apartment: Have Your Say

I would say that you mind your own business!

LordIsaac:
➜You keep quiet and carry your cross... that's the "worse" you vowed to.😁

I disagree! A lie is definitely a lie. But the problem is, how to obtain evidence to prove that it was a lie.

teeteepeejay:
➜Finding virgins is like finding a pawpaw seeds in a watermelon. Nonetheless, a lie is a lie. We wont live based on those lies. You either love me like that or you move on.

Well, the same way you cannot tell whether a man is a virgin unless he tells you himself, is the same way you cannot tell whether a woman is a virgin unless she tells you that she is. That fact has been established for many decades now...only many of you continue to think you have some sort of virgin detector in your brains.

ebubeson:
What should someone do if the person does not care whether a lady is a virgin or not, but a lady lied to such person about virginity and the person discovered after the wedding?

How do you discover that she lied about her virginity, though? Let's start with you explaining how you mean here.

Meedon:
➜Anything her eyes see for such cohabitation make she take am.

carry your bullsheet reasoning, enter the gutter somewhere. 🥱🥱🥱

Meedon:
➜Why did the girl accept to cohabit with someone who is not her husband?

Because she could, same way that you can.

Sermwell:
➜Which impact are you talking about? Is the same girl not married now and the parents even claiming she's a virgin?

Ah, I see! Because she is now married, it means her body was not medically impacted in any way by the abortions that she had to inflict on her body, thanks to you? My gosh, you must be the most brilliant one from your part of the world! You must be so very proud of the job you did in her womb, too, that you felt the need to come announce it here for all to read about, right? 😲😲😲

Sermwell:
➜Two adults did something and you conveniently blame one of them? We cohabited for close to 4 years, and it's only normal for such to happen.

Two adults did something... You mean to tell us that it was your body, too, that had to deal with the impacts of the abortions? Nonsense!

Sermwell:
When I was in the university, me and my ex girlfriend cohabited for close to 4 years. She was studying pharmacy while I was studying law. There was nothing we didn't do sexually, including an*l sex and all. She even mistakenly took in 3 times and we had to abort because we weren't ready. We eventually broke up amicably after school. ...

You intentionally refused to use protection during sex with your girlfriend, endangering her life 3 times — abortions in Nigeria remain very unsafe for the body of the woman— and you came here to announce this, why? You knew well the dangers of abortion on the bodies of women, yet you ignored that because, after all, it was not your body or life at risk each time. That's also why you came here to regale us with this story, let me guess... so you could get applauded and commended for it?

kingviny:
➜I think we should tell Senator Ned to help us sponsor a bill in the National Assembly that would make marriage license renewable every 5 years . Sex frequency, duties etc must also be drafted like a contract and any bridge should incur a fine. After 5 years, if any party is not happy, the marital license would not be renewed as such they can then go their separate ways.
This would help put couples on their toes. The so called "for better for worse" ideology is a scam ! It's not working.
My proposal would drastically reduce divorce or sadness in marriage, trust me. If the marriage was a mistake in the 1st place, it would address it. If it is laziness in marriage, couples would sit up and strive to please eachother before their license expires , they would fight for the marriage even if there are some misunderstanding or they divorce and share custody of their kid(s) if they have any and provided the 2 are irreconcilable. They should just shake hands, wish eachother the best of luck and move on with their lives . Collective sadness creates doom over a nation and it causes national setback .
Life shouldn't be made too difficult, necessity is the mother of invention.
Let's think people ! Let's save our society ! Let's give it a try.

Dem never solve common sense issues like provision of basic amenities, education, and work on rampant homelessness, na marriage those morons go come solve for you? The way many of you think ehn...no wonder Nigeria is where it remains. Tufiakwa!

MaziObinnaokija:
➜U beta com out of that self imprison . Play with yo fellow hostel peepz,go to class and read yo books instead of waiting for phone call

Why are you lying to him? Are you trying to get us all here to believe that you have never experienced anxiety or panic attacks before? Cut the bull and stop lying to your fellow humans. 🥱🥱🥱

brain54:
➜I understand all these and fully aware... But I don't understand why you quoted me kobo? I only said they are sites were people pay for such services. Surely you didn't think I was mocking lonely people?

I am just making sure the message is balanced with the fact that many of those sites provide much-needed help for real problems that people are going through. The money to be spent should not be the focus, but the benefits one could derive from accessing such services.

What OP needs is helpful advice to help him overcome what many of us have at one time or another had to deal with as human beings in this life. So, the best would be to give our best advice so he can get back to his calm, motivated, focused self, and also gain the experience— life cheat sheet— needed should he face this same issue elsewhere in the future.

Wananonly:
Nobody will talk to you the way some good music would bro...

Music does not treat or cure anxiety. Focused CBT and mindfulness— improving one's social and emotional intelligence— can.

Traay:
➜op go and talk to chatgbt, but seriously op are you gay? this’s some gay sh*t you’re doing here, looking for someone who will comfort you because you got your heart broken.

Stop being stewpid! Anxiety has nothing to do with gayness. As a matter of fact, the male loneliness epidemic — also a mental illness — that the medical world has been talking about today affects more heterosexual males than gays or even women. Stop trying to bully or shut down those who admit to themselves at least that they indeed have a problem that needs medical attention.

The funny part is that most of you trying to bully others into keeping quiet about their suffering are suffering the same thing they are. Only you think you believe that being vulnerable is some weakness when, in reality, it is the best and only way to get yourself the help that you also need for what ails you. 🥱🥱

brain54:
They are sites and apps where people actually make money from people like you... Lonely people pay people money just to talk to them!

Loneliness can hit anyone at pretty much any time. (It does not discriminate by gender, age, or race.) The only way to shore oneself of it is to ensure one continues to build up one's emotional and social health/intelligence, something most of us ignore.

Host78:
➜ Been feeling lonely and suicidal lately. Had my heart broken. My exam is coming up soon and I can't focus to read. Everyone expect me to be strong. I can't even talk to friends or family because all the time they expect me to perfect.
But I'm shattered inside. I feel messed up. Please if anyone can help me through this trying times. Comfort, motivation. Anything I'll appreciate. Honestly I hv no idea how to get myself out of this. Since morning I've been indoors all alone. Trying to read and can't read. Trying to sleep I can't sleep Can't eat and yet so hungry. Food feels tasteless. I really need help If you can call 0705 582 28 49

, what it sounds like you are dealing with is anxiety and maybe boiling over into panic attacks. I suggest you put on your exercise gear and take to taking long walks or jog around the way for as long as 30 or more minutes. Regular exercise will do you a whole load of good right now. And while jogging, I recommend you listen to some uplifting emotional therapy, like what is obtained from the following YouTube channels

➜ The School of Life
➜ Psych2go

Note that the key is engaging in serious regular SELF REFLECTION, without which you will only be kicking stones down the road.

Also of great importance is getting enough sleep every night, regardless of how stressed you may be. Sleep helps us combat that stress hormone—cortisol— that powers much of our anxiety, so it is essential to get at least 8 hours of sleep each night, no matter what it is we are up against. That way, you make your battle against anxiety much smoother for yourself.

Additionally, suppose you have been consuming foods, drinks, or drugs— coffee, coke, high-caffeine drinks, etc., — high in caffeine, particularly to help you boost your focus during exams, I suggest you cut them out completely at this point. Very, very important that you cut them off, cause they may be exacerbating your anxiety too.

Another thing you can do is see a professional mental health therapist asap and work with him/her to get you where you can begin changing your behavior towards treatment. You can beat anxiety before it takes complete control over you, if you have the willpower to do what is necessary.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s9zZr2KRvzs?si=yE3BaYEwXkIxzXRb

Omowale2023:
➜I read the article. And you assumed that men cause more birth difficult issues than women. That's why I gave you that scenario, but as the feminist you are, you Doge the question. I ain't surprised. Continue deceiving yourself and massaging your own egotistical narrative. You will learn.

1. You clearly didn't read the article, and also didn't comprehend any of what I stated so far. So, I suggest you go back and read. Stop trying to make others do comprehension-related work for you.🥱🥱

Chetas81:
your opinion

It ain't an opinion but a fact. Men can and do date other men. Most men who do it are too ashamed to admit that their admiration lies with their fellow men and not with women..🥱🥱

louken:
✓ Of all the factors one might consider important, it is the postpartum looks that ranks highest in your mind. Someone is planning to bring children to this world and has decided in advance that she will fully deny them the experience of having a father figure in their life and you don't find that disturbing.
You don't fail to show your double standards when it comes to your fellow women. That's very low.
Being a feminist shouldn't rob you of your brain or morality

Um .. to an actress, her looks are ultimately of high importance to her. She could still bring a child into this world -- if that is really what she is ready to and wants to do because of herself and not because society said so --- by way of surrogacy, like many others before her have done, instead of playing that lottery with her source of livelihood. 🥱🥱🥱

Please spend some real, serious time processing what I posted before attempting to respond.🥱🥱😷

wirinet:
✓ You keep posting that your screenshot without context. Now, you circle unconditional gift? What do you understand by the the word "unconditional"? Apart from donations, inheritance and what hausa call "barra", is there any gift that can be considered unconditional gift. We all witnessed a lady fined and told to refund a monetary gift obtained from a man on the condition of transportation to his house. If I gifted you a car on the promise of love, and at the end you left me immediately you collected the car, is the gift still considered unconditional?

Go spew this gobbledegook elsewhere, abeg! 🥱🥱🥱

Omowale2023:
But someone has countered your theories already. Then how do you explain a situation when a man has been pouring inside his wife for 20 years and he decided to go outside and the first sex, pregnancy immediately? And the child is okay and there are no deformities?

I can immediately tell that you did not read the article for yourself but immediately chose to depend on the insinuations made by some others on the content. Anyways ...🥱🥱🥱

aalangel:
You want to intentionally bring children to this world without a father-figure. Crap!!!!

The vast majority of children out there don't even know where their so-called father figures are, not for many, many years now; and their mothers are still supposedly married to these men who are absent from their children's lives. So, what would make her case different from theirs?

IyaTola:
➜Most parents would be shock to find out that most GenZ female are not interested in marriage.

These are kids who watched their parents and grandparents and realized that marriage as configured in most Nigerian homes offers next to no benefits to them. And they are right in thinking so, as the indices continue to show that most are better off without marriage, and particular children since they now realize that contrary to claims made by their parents, children -- the result of two individuals having sex -- is a burden/responsibility not a blessing. .

Actually, the trend started before Gen Z, but with the rise in the population of those choosing to go against the grain, thanks to many more Gen Zs making that decision earlier than many from the generations before them did, it has become more visible than ever before as a result.

CrownOfClay724:
Not a tribal thing. People, these days, generally do not marry for love. They come together for convenience and mutual goals. Love somehow manage to creep in or not while they're at it.

---

If the man was impotent or have a small pen, I heavily doubt she would stay. So, do your vetting, learn who you are doing life with and treat them how they will treat you.

It's not just people these days; we are now only finally talking about the reality of how many men out there marry women they literally hate(only a couple marry women they are indifferent to). And yes, a lot of women have, from time, been forced into marriage with men who don't even consider them for much except as tools for their physical pleasure and free labor. And so, it is no surprise that a lot of women continue to settle for any man they can get in marriage to date.

Such a man does himself a disservice in marrying someone who does not already approve of him as he is.