₦airaland Forum

Josywhyte:
✓ Na men wey no wise dey make woman matter carry them go prison. It's better to send her away or end the marriage than reacting in a way that will lead to you being sent to prison

A very foolish culture that causes them to believe criminal assault over woman matter is for the sake of their egos. 🥱🥱🥱

trendingnigeria:
.....

Why is he responding now after so .many of families of members of his own church too has been struggling with this for many years now? He should have remained quiet until death abeg!

themanderon:
✓ So having a healthy sex life now equates to someone being a cheap LovePeddler? Someone who has had many sexual partners is no better that the prostitute on the streets even though they deceive themselves they are better.

So basically, your admission then is that all of your father's who had many sex partners before marriage were no different from cheap love peddlers, abi? Good of you to finally admit to what we have known all this while! 🥱🥱🥱

Chilipepper:
What’s one lesson you learned as a child that still guides your life today?

No man is a god over another man unless that another man chooses to make a god out of him.

Shalom80:
✓ I will not argue with you. Everyone is entitled to their opinion on issue, so...

Opinions are closer to myths and not facts.

Shalom80:
I will not argue with you. Everyone is entitled to their opinion on issue, so...

A myth is any idea that is not based on pure facts. Your suggestion that because she wore one of out of those dresses means the myth is true, is based on an opinion that is meant to propagate a myth rather than a fact.

Kingogbotor:
➜Am not married ..so am allowed to use my ding dong the way that pleases me..and of course use protection .....

Wait, you cannot abide the fact that unmarried women also have the exact same rights you claim here?

themanderon:
Many women and men especially women do not have self respect for themselves. How can you be jumping into bed with different partners? It's a sign of mental illness.

I guess you know more than the experts who instead said that having a healthy sex life does more good than bad to one's overall mental health.

Davimana:
After months of job hunting in Lagos I got a job in Yenagoa, Bayelsa with a pay of 150,000, but my sister that has been a great influence in my life thinks I shouldn’t go please guys what do you think

Whatever you decide, you alone can know if it is a risk worth taking for your own life. No matter how good anyone else has been to you, remember, it is not their life but yours to live according to what you think is best for you.

Shalom80:
➜Good to know that you at least wore one, and it goes on to strengthen the notion that the 'myth' is true.

Not it doesnt't! This idea that if you can somehow pick out something, you can at least claim an entire myth as fact shows how very damaged many of you in Nigeria were raised when it comes to honesty and respecting truth.

Pray4meJC:
You're right and that's why it's okay to be heavenly cautious at all times in order to escape in times of the evil days. "Lead us not into temptation but deliver us from all evil". Every True Christian is mandated to die daily. In other words dead to sin & every appearance of it. Dead body no dey comit sin.
If I drop some testimonies on this forum, kids will open mouth "waaaaaa" to insult me without realizing the spiritual consequences. Reason we don't say certain things so that careless people wouldn't entangle themselves or die useless death because of their tongue.
Finally, a child of God is fortified with power and fire & no Fulani terrorists or kidnapper can dare. A person claiming christianity as a title while neglecting Heb 6:1 is a big joke 🤣 😂

E no go pass una usual now... "My God saved me while he abandoned everyone else to die...pray the Lord." Abi, no be so?

Emeskhalifa:
➜Dey play, I don see man wey be say all hin children deserted him. You think say na by that one

. Whether the man married or not, he would likely have been abandoned still.

infogenius:
➜Pattern matters, yes.
But let’s keep the same energy both ways:
A man who has slept with 50+ women while “waiting for the right one” is showing the exact same lack of discipline, impulse control, and accountability he’s accusing women of. Same pattern, different gender.
If “easy access” is a red flag in her, serial cheating and “body count hunting” is a red flag in him.
The real metric isn’t body count or even pattern alone; it’s growth.
 Has the person recognised their old pattern, owned it, and changed?

Or are they still repeating it while pointing fingers? A repentant 50-body-count person who’s now disciplined and loyal is safer than a “low-count” person still stuck in pride and excuses.
Judge patterns, yes.
 But judge ur own too. Fair is fair. 💯

I completely accept and think your take on this is the most reasonable here compared to the gobbledegoop that is the OP. However, I have a question about something you indicated there regarding this "waiting for the right one" state. Why does it seem to me that you are suggesting that someone in that state is not expected to explore fully his/her sexuality — not cheating, of course — during that period?

Josywhyte:
➜You don't seem to understand my comment

Oh, you meant who dem catch cheating? My particular focus is on men ending up in prison cause of a woman's matter like the one described.

princeade86:
➜but senator married same age girl, no arrest was made.

Am I the Nigerian people in Nigeria who refuse to demand justice be served in all cases?

Josywhyte:
➜Na who them catch be thief....

Go ask all the 10s of thousands of men who have been rotting in KiriKiri to this day for the same thing whether na so e be for them.

guobe:
➜Your thoughts are the fairy tale here as less than 1 percent of parents have evil intentions towards the kids they brought to the world.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

guobe:
➜Even to parents?it does not add up.

It won't add up to someone whose idea of life is riddled with fairy tales— from the content of your OP —and little of reality. 🥱🥱🥱

Yes, your parents are not gods, and you will be shocked to find that even your own parents are just as bad as those other vile people out there in the world. And yes, lots of people end up going no contact with their parents. Always seek the truth behind every tale you are told, especially by Nigerians. 🥱🥱🥱

guobe:
In my former neighbourhood, there was this young man that was studying medicine in the university, a very brilliant chap and doing very well in his academics. Though the parents were struggling financially, they made sure all his needs were met.
An opportunity came then with the Nigerian Government giving scholarship to scholars to school in Russia and this guy was successful as he got a scholarship to study Engineering in Russia .
That was it ,he married a Russian woman and broke communication with his parents and siblings in Nigeria . The parents were heart broken especially the mum as it made her fall ill and she never recovered from it. She died and the son didn't come to Nigeria for final farewell.
The dad just died and still no show from him. Just got chatting with one of his siblings and he said he is yet to fathom why he acted this way as he was well treated as a kid before he went to Russia. What could have really made him to act this way is a million dollar question. Life.

From your story, what is clear is that you were not an insider to this family and as such do not know the real reason behind why the man decided to go no contact with his parents after he left Nigeria. I suggest you focus your energy on finding out the truth, and stop going around telling these tales by moonlight that Nigerian airheads are notorious for.

Children who go no contact with their parents do so for very reasonable reasons, and most times, things are never as you think they seem.

Talismann:
na so bisi jump straight from number one to number 5 that year.
Very fuuleash girl

Is Bisi living her life on your dime or under your roof? 🥱🥱🥱

yomifowe:
✓ You mean you will not want her to graduate after matriculating, and you won't tie the knot the proper way before getting her pregnant? Then you really don't love her.

Why not let her do her life as she sees fit, the same way you let your sons do their lives as best they choose? 🥱🥱🥱

If she.doesn't wish to matriculate on your schedule, let her. Why must you impose of her ideas that may not be well suited to who she really is?

If she does not believe it is necessary to tie the knot, let her since, again, if you raised her well then it means she should then know what is best for her in her adult life. 🥱🥱🥱

If she chooses to have a child or not, that should be her own decision to make. 🥱🥱🥱

Or is this all about you being a bad parent and so feeling you should then also decide for your Children even after they have left to live out their adult years? 🥱🥱🥱

Meedon:
✓ Kobo why are you crying?

When did the Yawning emoji become crying emojis for you? 🥱🥱🥱

BAILMONEY:
In the Eastern Nigeria, we have so many unmarried Adas who now takes care of their fathers compound as Di-okpara. I mean Santa nwegbes and holy nwejes of this world

Are you certain you are OK in the head at all? 🥱🥱🥱

simpleseyi:
✓ And there are people in the gathering. Everyone there should be picked up and jailed for aiding and abetting child marriage and abuse. One year imprisonment for everyone there as the base. Those that ate two plates of Jollof rice should be jailed for twi years. Those that drank Hero beer ones by our brother Peter Obi, those ones should be jailed three years. Those that danced and sprayed Baira there should be jailed four years. Those that are there and even stole food to take home should be jailed five years

That would actually be reasonable to see happen.

BAILMONEY:
what is wrong with the marriage

So, the fact that it is a crime to marry or sexually engage underage girl in Nigeria is never mind to you?

Sonofgod1990:
The man is an Hausa man
I know him very well in dat community

And that somehow makes this OK?

I hope the girl's parents are also in handcuffs. 🥱🥱

writetopoker:
But they have been striffing before now, so whats the difference

Are you Ok in the head? What does it matter that the man has been graping her before the marriage? 🥱🥱🥱

ogaemma:
✓ May it happen to you and may you not fight.
Brainless mugu

It is brainless individuals such as yourself who reason that commiting a crime gets you some release when 10s of thousands of people like you are today in Kirikiri for the same thing. 🥱🥱🥱

Nefort:
✓ Stop the generalization. Just because you read some stupid posts on Nairaland doesn't mean it reflects the general opinion of the entire Nigerian men.
✓ Stop defending your poorly worded comment. You could have said something like:
✓ Cheating is wrong. I hope the husband is also faithful to his wife.

Generalization, you say! The fact that not a single Nigerian man has of note publicly denounced the trend which began during the time of your ancestors and continues to this day in most every traditional group is evidence enough that more this is a cultural norm. In fact, by my generation, the women had begun teaching their daughters that they would need to overlook cheating of their husbands in the marriage home.

2. Yawn ! 🥱🥱🥱🥱

3. Not in the Nigerian content where more than 90% of the time, society faults the women even when it is the man doing the cheating....abegi make I hear word.🥱🥱🥱

yomifowe:
✓ Dear Parents TEACH YOUR DAUGHTERS THAT There are five (5) important dresses a woman should wear in her lifetime.
These are:
1. School uniform
2. Matriculation gown
3. Graduation gown
4. Wedding gown
5. Maternity gown
Let your daughters know that if any girl skips the 2nd dress, she will not get to wear the 3rd.
Daughters must not rush to wear the 5th just because a man has promised them the 4th.
More so, the 4th fits better and more prestigious if worn before the 5th.
Our daughters must learn to wait and follow the dress pattern from 1 to 5.Be a good parent and leader.
We have this as a responsibility to our children as parents and it is very important. May God help us. Amen!

Nonsense and Bullsheet! 🥳🥱🥱

If a woman then chooses not to wear any of those gowns:
1. She attends schools that require no school uniforms or she was homeschooled
2. She does not fancy wearing a matriculation gown and commits no criminal offense by it
3.. She graduates from college but skips the graduation ceremony for her peace of mind
4. She chooses to remain single to keep her peace and joy instead
5. She chooses not to have kids at all so she can make money and live to her fullest.
What becomes of this idea of yours on how parents should raise their daughters? 🥱🥱🥱

Na you go come tell the grown woman in this case say she no dey responsible or do her part in living her life well as she chooses? 🥱🥱🥱

Look, parents who think to force their children into moulds are examples of terrible parent the world no longer has need for. Ask your Gen Z /Gen Alpha children and they might tell you this to your face too. 🥱🥱🥱

Mrfixitt:
✓ Over nothing you said ? Too many Oloshos these days

Go Kirikiri go ask the men there who were jailed flr years over that ssme stewpidity whether na something then. 🥱🥱🥱

Nefort:
✓ You need to condemn the cheating first before questioning the man's faithfulness.
✓ What if the man has been absolutely faithful?
✓ Your comment is a bad attempt to make the public believe his wife's cheating is justified because he might also be cheating on his wife.
✓Your comment was driven by the urge to defend a fellow woman and not by reasoning and intelligence

I can't condemn the cheating since Nigerian men have, have on the most part, stated that man is allowed to cheat in a relationship. By that, Nigerian women(also humans/ same species as man) have also have the freedom to do so in their Nigerian marriages.

2. There were no what-ifs to the claims bellowed for thdecades -- from the time of our ancestors--- by Nigerian men. So why should I consider a what if here? 🥱🥱🥱

3. Your interpretation of my comment is wrong. I hold no opinion as far as the cheating. I don't really care about it.,
My one and only concern here is the man there reasoning that he is justified in his assaulting of the other man. Go Kirikiri and you will find 10s of thousands of men locked up in there all because they could not control their emotions over woman matter. 🥱🥱🥱

I only mentioned his possibly cheating on her too to illustrate the fact that even adulterous Nigerian men are also known to resort to the same levels of foolishness that the man displayed in this situation. 🥱🥱🥱