₦airaland Forum

budaatum:
➜So parents can rape their children, but the children should not cut off completely? Why?

Na the religious/traditional crowd be that— very evil entitled beings who believe themselves entitled to their children's attention and energy, no matter how wicked they have been to those children. I am glad the world is finally shifting in a direction away from all of that previous blindness. 🥱🥱🥱

LyfeJennings:
➜Not all the time bro. I once knew a guy who ghosted his mum when he went to America. As at that time, I was processing my visa too So the mum linked me with her son. Things were going smoothly but after a while the guy ghosted everyone including his mum. The mum was going from one Alfa to another. Nothing wey the woman no do finish but this guy didn't pick his mum's call or returned it for over 5 years. Somehow the mum died, Alaye still no show. I now sent an email to the wife saying the mum is dead. The guy now called me crying. Some kids are just heartless . Just cold hearted kids. May we not be them or birth them

This story of yours is very stewpid! Want to know why?🥱🥱🥱

All you know is that the man went abroad. You have no idea what he may have had to suffer through with that woman before he finally got himself abroad. You do not know what other people his mother (who may have been a huge burden on his life and path) may have connected him with—probably without his permission too—all because he finally succeeded in leaving for abroad. You don't know the temperature of their relationship before he left and afterwards. But here you are certain that because she was going from one alfa to another — you don't even know what her relationship and seeks with those alfas really were— she was definitely a good mother to her son? Do you realize how this paints you as having poor judgment as far as people and the relationship between that mother and son? 🥱🥱

This write-up of yours here is yet another reason why Nigerians remain, to this day, some of the worst when it comes to empathizing with their fellow Nigerians both at home and abroad.

Please spare me from any follows to this, abeg! 🥱🥱🥱

budaatum:
➜I know a child who was abused by her mother. The mother reported her to her friends in church and they intervened and spoke to the child.
The child told them what the mother had been doing, which included telling the daughter she should have been aborted when she was conceived, and blaming her for the break up of her mother's marriage, though it was the mother herself who ran off with another man, amongst various other things over the years.
They still told the daughter to go and apologise to the mother. So she told them how unfair it was to tell her to continue turning the other cheek instead of telling the mother to stop slapping her! They all shut up after that.

There are literally many stories of abusive Nigerian parents out there; many of those from such homes are, to this day, yet to realize that they were in fact abused by the same parents whom they continue to worship as though gods and infallible.

It is people like OP, particularly those from traditional and/or religious backgrounds, who are most notorious for perpetuating the abuse with their twisted narratives and interpretations of events.

Charbliss90:
➜Did you read all his post at all? In the post he said the claim not to know why he behaved that way, so he's curious why he brought it here

Um... curious while absolutely concluding that the boy is indeed lost and a bad person for not visiting his parents? I am gonna guess you did not process the conclusions that OP reached in his OP and his subsequent posts.

Dancebreaker:
✓ Nor mind that guy. It's by the grace of God that some people abroad have not broken contact completely. Usually because of the parents.
The evil, envy and bad belle (even from some relatives doing ok in 9ja) is on another level. I believe less than 5% of relatives are worth communicating with. 9ja is in a mess for a good reason: Too many people who are far worse than they appear.

From the much i know and experienced growing up, Nigerians are generally bad parents --- most of them believe abusing children in one form or another is the way to discipline and mold children into better people - with most believing themselves to be entitled to their children's attention and lives even at that.

Worse, the society also tends to take the side of the abuser and almost never the side of the abused, something OP (who literally does not seem to know what truly happened) seems to be doing here with his fairy tale take on what went down.

trendingnigeria:
✓ That's not correct. If you know him, you will know that he is different.

The man is a fraud no different room all of the other gods of mens out there world over. His every words filled with contradictory claims and now he pretends to care about the kidnappings and killings across Nigeria now that he sees the international audience is watching closely.

BrighterSyde:
✓ So your conclusion that his anger is not justified is based on the assumption that he might have been cheating on his wife before?
✓ No evidence. Just a stupid assumption so you can justify your daft reasoning. Thank God normal humans don’t reason and pass judgement based on assumptions like you if not you’d be dead by now.

Anger? The story instead said the man and the other man fought. Wetin concern anger and criminal assault? Do all people in your home resort to assault when angered or something? 🥱🥱😂

2. Even if he caught them both in bed naked and plumbing each other, would that give him this justification for assault which is a criminal offense? Nonsense! 🥱🥱🥱

Someone said it best on another thread that the reason wey that country no dey work is because the people themselves no value never valued their own laws. 🥱🥱🥱🥱

Josywhyte:
✓ Na men wey no wise dey make woman matter carry them go prison. It's better to send her away or end the marriage than reacting in a way that will lead to you being sent to prison

A very foolish culture that causes them to believe criminal assault over woman matter is for the sake of their egos. 🥱🥱🥱

trendingnigeria:
.....

Why is he responding now after so .many of families of members of his own church too has been struggling with this for many years now? He should have remained quiet until death abeg!

themanderon:
✓ So having a healthy sex life now equates to someone being a cheap LovePeddler? Someone who has had many sexual partners is no better that the prostitute on the streets even though they deceive themselves they are better.

So basically, your admission then is that all of your father's who had many sex partners before marriage were no different from cheap love peddlers, abi? Good of you to finally admit to what we have known all this while! 🥱🥱🥱

Chilipepper:
What’s one lesson you learned as a child that still guides your life today?

No man is a god over another man unless that another man chooses to make a god out of him.

Shalom80:
✓ I will not argue with you. Everyone is entitled to their opinion on issue, so...

Opinions are closer to myths and not facts.

Shalom80:
I will not argue with you. Everyone is entitled to their opinion on issue, so...

A myth is any idea that is not based on pure facts. Your suggestion that because she wore one of out of those dresses means the myth is true, is based on an opinion that is meant to propagate a myth rather than a fact.

Kingogbotor:
➜Am not married ..so am allowed to use my ding dong the way that pleases me..and of course use protection .....

Wait, you cannot abide the fact that unmarried women also have the exact same rights you claim here?

themanderon:
Many women and men especially women do not have self respect for themselves. How can you be jumping into bed with different partners? It's a sign of mental illness.

I guess you know more than the experts who instead said that having a healthy sex life does more good than bad to one's overall mental health.

Davimana:
After months of job hunting in Lagos I got a job in Yenagoa, Bayelsa with a pay of 150,000, but my sister that has been a great influence in my life thinks I shouldn’t go please guys what do you think

Whatever you decide, you alone can know if it is a risk worth taking for your own life. No matter how good anyone else has been to you, remember, it is not their life but yours to live according to what you think is best for you.

Shalom80:
➜Good to know that you at least wore one, and it goes on to strengthen the notion that the 'myth' is true.

Not it doesnt't! This idea that if you can somehow pick out something, you can at least claim an entire myth as fact shows how very damaged many of you in Nigeria were raised when it comes to honesty and respecting truth.

Pray4meJC:
You're right and that's why it's okay to be heavenly cautious at all times in order to escape in times of the evil days. "Lead us not into temptation but deliver us from all evil". Every True Christian is mandated to die daily. In other words dead to sin & every appearance of it. Dead body no dey comit sin.
If I drop some testimonies on this forum, kids will open mouth "waaaaaa" to insult me without realizing the spiritual consequences. Reason we don't say certain things so that careless people wouldn't entangle themselves or die useless death because of their tongue.
Finally, a child of God is fortified with power and fire & no Fulani terrorists or kidnapper can dare. A person claiming christianity as a title while neglecting Heb 6:1 is a big joke 🤣 😂

E no go pass una usual now... "My God saved me while he abandoned everyone else to die...pray the Lord." Abi, no be so?

Emeskhalifa:
➜Dey play, I don see man wey be say all hin children deserted him. You think say na by that one

. Whether the man married or not, he would likely have been abandoned still.

infogenius:
➜Pattern matters, yes.
But let’s keep the same energy both ways:
A man who has slept with 50+ women while “waiting for the right one” is showing the exact same lack of discipline, impulse control, and accountability he’s accusing women of. Same pattern, different gender.
If “easy access” is a red flag in her, serial cheating and “body count hunting” is a red flag in him.
The real metric isn’t body count or even pattern alone; it’s growth.
 Has the person recognised their old pattern, owned it, and changed?

Or are they still repeating it while pointing fingers? A repentant 50-body-count person who’s now disciplined and loyal is safer than a “low-count” person still stuck in pride and excuses.
Judge patterns, yes.
 But judge ur own too. Fair is fair. 💯

I completely accept and think your take on this is the most reasonable here compared to the gobbledegoop that is the OP. However, I have a question about something you indicated there regarding this "waiting for the right one" state. Why does it seem to me that you are suggesting that someone in that state is not expected to explore fully his/her sexuality — not cheating, of course — during that period?

Josywhyte:
➜You don't seem to understand my comment

Oh, you meant who dem catch cheating? My particular focus is on men ending up in prison cause of a woman's matter like the one described.

princeade86:
➜but senator married same age girl, no arrest was made.

Am I the Nigerian people in Nigeria who refuse to demand justice be served in all cases?

Josywhyte:
➜Na who them catch be thief....

Go ask all the 10s of thousands of men who have been rotting in KiriKiri to this day for the same thing whether na so e be for them.

guobe:
➜Your thoughts are the fairy tale here as less than 1 percent of parents have evil intentions towards the kids they brought to the world.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

guobe:
➜Even to parents?it does not add up.

It won't add up to someone whose idea of life is riddled with fairy tales— from the content of your OP —and little of reality. 🥱🥱🥱

Yes, your parents are not gods, and you will be shocked to find that even your own parents are just as bad as those other vile people out there in the world. And yes, lots of people end up going no contact with their parents. Always seek the truth behind every tale you are told, especially by Nigerians. 🥱🥱🥱

guobe:
In my former neighbourhood, there was this young man that was studying medicine in the university, a very brilliant chap and doing very well in his academics. Though the parents were struggling financially, they made sure all his needs were met.
An opportunity came then with the Nigerian Government giving scholarship to scholars to school in Russia and this guy was successful as he got a scholarship to study Engineering in Russia .
That was it ,he married a Russian woman and broke communication with his parents and siblings in Nigeria . The parents were heart broken especially the mum as it made her fall ill and she never recovered from it. She died and the son didn't come to Nigeria for final farewell.
The dad just died and still no show from him. Just got chatting with one of his siblings and he said he is yet to fathom why he acted this way as he was well treated as a kid before he went to Russia. What could have really made him to act this way is a million dollar question. Life.

From your story, what is clear is that you were not an insider to this family and as such do not know the real reason behind why the man decided to go no contact with his parents after he left Nigeria. I suggest you focus your energy on finding out the truth, and stop going around telling these tales by moonlight that Nigerian airheads are notorious for.

Children who go no contact with their parents do so for very reasonable reasons, and most times, things are never as you think they seem.

Talismann:
na so bisi jump straight from number one to number 5 that year.
Very fuuleash girl

Is Bisi living her life on your dime or under your roof? 🥱🥱🥱

yomifowe:
✓ You mean you will not want her to graduate after matriculating, and you won't tie the knot the proper way before getting her pregnant? Then you really don't love her.

Why not let her do her life as she sees fit, the same way you let your sons do their lives as best they choose? 🥱🥱🥱

If she.doesn't wish to matriculate on your schedule, let her. Why must you impose of her ideas that may not be well suited to who she really is?

If she does not believe it is necessary to tie the knot, let her since, again, if you raised her well then it means she should then know what is best for her in her adult life. 🥱🥱🥱

If she chooses to have a child or not, that should be her own decision to make. 🥱🥱🥱

Or is this all about you being a bad parent and so feeling you should then also decide for your Children even after they have left to live out their adult years? 🥱🥱🥱

Meedon:
✓ Kobo why are you crying?

When did the Yawning emoji become crying emojis for you? 🥱🥱🥱

BAILMONEY:
In the Eastern Nigeria, we have so many unmarried Adas who now takes care of their fathers compound as Di-okpara. I mean Santa nwegbes and holy nwejes of this world

Are you certain you are OK in the head at all? 🥱🥱🥱

simpleseyi:
✓ And there are people in the gathering. Everyone there should be picked up and jailed for aiding and abetting child marriage and abuse. One year imprisonment for everyone there as the base. Those that ate two plates of Jollof rice should be jailed for twi years. Those that drank Hero beer ones by our brother Peter Obi, those ones should be jailed three years. Those that danced and sprayed Baira there should be jailed four years. Those that are there and even stole food to take home should be jailed five years

That would actually be reasonable to see happen.