₦airaland Forum

BAILMONEY:
In the Eastern Nigeria, we have so many unmarried Adas who now takes care of their fathers compound as Di-okpara. I mean Santa nwegbes and holy nwejes of this world

Are you certain you are OK in the head at all? 🥱🥱🥱

simpleseyi:
✓ And there are people in the gathering. Everyone there should be picked up and jailed for aiding and abetting child marriage and abuse. One year imprisonment for everyone there as the base. Those that ate two plates of Jollof rice should be jailed for twi years. Those that drank Hero beer ones by our brother Peter Obi, those ones should be jailed three years. Those that danced and sprayed Baira there should be jailed four years. Those that are there and even stole food to take home should be jailed five years

That would actually be reasonable to see happen.

BAILMONEY:
what is wrong with the marriage

So, the fact that it is a crime to marry or sexually engage underage girl in Nigeria is never mind to you?

Sonofgod1990:
The man is an Hausa man
I know him very well in dat community

And that somehow makes this OK?

I hope the girl's parents are also in handcuffs. 🥱🥱

writetopoker:
But they have been striffing before now, so whats the difference

Are you Ok in the head? What does it matter that the man has been graping her before the marriage? 🥱🥱🥱

ogaemma:
✓ May it happen to you and may you not fight.
Brainless mugu

It is brainless individuals such as yourself who reason that commiting a crime gets you some release when 10s of thousands of people like you are today in Kirikiri for the same thing. 🥱🥱🥱

Nefort:
✓ Stop the generalization. Just because you read some stupid posts on Nairaland doesn't mean it reflects the general opinion of the entire Nigerian men.
✓ Stop defending your poorly worded comment. You could have said something like:
✓ Cheating is wrong. I hope the husband is also faithful to his wife.

Generalization, you say! The fact that not a single Nigerian man has of note publicly denounced the trend which began during the time of your ancestors and continues to this day in most every traditional group is evidence enough that more this is a cultural norm. In fact, by my generation, the women had begun teaching their daughters that they would need to overlook cheating of their husbands in the marriage home.

2. Yawn ! 🥱🥱🥱🥱

3. Not in the Nigerian content where more than 90% of the time, society faults the women even when it is the man doing the cheating....abegi make I hear word.🥱🥱🥱

yomifowe:
✓ Dear Parents TEACH YOUR DAUGHTERS THAT There are five (5) important dresses a woman should wear in her lifetime.
These are:
1. School uniform
2. Matriculation gown
3. Graduation gown
4. Wedding gown
5. Maternity gown
Let your daughters know that if any girl skips the 2nd dress, she will not get to wear the 3rd.
Daughters must not rush to wear the 5th just because a man has promised them the 4th.
More so, the 4th fits better and more prestigious if worn before the 5th.
Our daughters must learn to wait and follow the dress pattern from 1 to 5.Be a good parent and leader.
We have this as a responsibility to our children as parents and it is very important. May God help us. Amen!

Nonsense and Bullsheet! 🥳🥱🥱

If a woman then chooses not to wear any of those gowns:
1. She attends schools that require no school uniforms or she was homeschooled
2. She does not fancy wearing a matriculation gown and commits no criminal offense by it
3.. She graduates from college but skips the graduation ceremony for her peace of mind
4. She chooses to remain single to keep her peace and joy instead
5. She chooses not to have kids at all so she can make money and live to her fullest.
What becomes of this idea of yours on how parents should raise their daughters? 🥱🥱🥱

Na you go come tell the grown woman in this case say she no dey responsible or do her part in living her life well as she chooses? 🥱🥱🥱

Look, parents who think to force their children into moulds are examples of terrible parent the world no longer has need for. Ask your Gen Z /Gen Alpha children and they might tell you this to your face too. 🥱🥱🥱

Mrfixitt:
✓ Over nothing you said ? Too many Oloshos these days

Go Kirikiri go ask the men there who were jailed flr years over that ssme stewpidity whether na something then. 🥱🥱🥱

Nefort:
✓ You need to condemn the cheating first before questioning the man's faithfulness.
✓ What if the man has been absolutely faithful?
✓ Your comment is a bad attempt to make the public believe his wife's cheating is justified because he might also be cheating on his wife.
✓Your comment was driven by the urge to defend a fellow woman and not by reasoning and intelligence

I can't condemn the cheating since Nigerian men have, have on the most part, stated that man is allowed to cheat in a relationship. By that, Nigerian women(also humans/ same species as man) have also have the freedom to do so in their Nigerian marriages.

2. There were no what-ifs to the claims bellowed for thdecades -- from the time of our ancestors--- by Nigerian men. So why should I consider a what if here? 🥱🥱🥱

3. Your interpretation of my comment is wrong. I hold no opinion as far as the cheating. I don't really care about it.,
My one and only concern here is the man there reasoning that he is justified in his assaulting of the other man. Go Kirikiri and you will find 10s of thousands of men locked up in there all because they could not control their emotions over woman matter. 🥱🥱🥱

I only mentioned his possibly cheating on her too to illustrate the fact that even adulterous Nigerian men are also known to resort to the same levels of foolishness that the man displayed in this situation. 🥱🥱🥱

DeclanR:
✓ Thanks for your spewing the bitter truth bro.I appreciate 🙏

Bitter truth, which the man has no substance-backed evidence for? Nonsense! 🥱😮😮

I know many of you thrive only when you label the woman as the problem in order to keep yourselves from taking accountability for your own mistakes, so I won't go much into that. The only evidence presented in your wrote up there stands against the young man's judgment. He went into a relationship -- he probably forced himself on her, too, at that, with a woman whom he literally sees so many red flags in. Does that make sense?

cutecommend:
✓ Do you have a partner that beats you always and later buys you gifts or spoil you with good things? Do you have a partner that cheats and shows remorse when caught? Do you have a partner that is toxic sometimes and very friendly sometimes? I want to tell you that the nice time your partner shows you after red flags does not destroy the red flag.
If you notice some terrible attitude of your partner that occurs especially on different occasions, do not be carried away by the beautiful times that her or she may give. You may see hell if you marry such a person.

The moment you first notice a red flag is the moment you should bail. 🥱🥱🥱..

gentlesmithugo:
wait first till it reach ur turn,den we will hear from u

You better go ask the 10s of thousands of men wey dey kirikiri for that particular stewpidity if they would do it again. 🥱🥱🥱

Wickedtruths:
Your post is a reflection of your kind of upbringing.

Not necessarily but yet, I was not raised tinybrained that I would believe it my place to go fight another human because I was rejected by a lover. 🥱🥱🥱

Marriage has never been permanent or by force. If I no longer want a person or a person no longer wants me, my life continues. 🥱🥱🥱

Meedon:
She is a married woman of particular concern. A disgraced married woman

Is thediwgraced married woman your property that you should reason you should fight another man and possibly end up in jail for it because she no longer desires you? Nonsense!

By the way, is a cheating married man also a disgraced man, or does this fire in you also only rise when a woman is involved since a whole lot of you delude yourselves still into believing women are your entitlement? 🥱🥱🥱

How come we also never see this sort of fervor when your politicians and gods of men dupe your lives? 🥱🥱🥱🥱

Awon first class didinrin!🙄🙄🙄

SkengRay:
.... . At no point have I said men are Emotionless Yes I agree that men can develop Emotional intelligence but emotional intelligence is not the Same as public Emotional Expressive. The latter harms man the Former helps Men and That's why Emotions don't benefit men in the Long run when expressed publicly.
➜ Read Carefully to understand and please Ease off on the Chatgpt

Well, forgive me but I am not in the mood to go around and around in circles with you and your ideas(meaningless opinions in my take) regarding society given that societal view of things are fluid... it is different with every zipcode you enter and literally prone to change like every season of the year.

Anyways, again, in your previous post, you finally arrived at the core problem when you explained that it was, in fact, a lack of emotional management skills among the majority of boys/men that men do not benefit from, not emotions. Here you try to backtrack, but... yeah... no, let's not dive back into the previous nonsense and focus now.

Now, there are quite a handful of emotionally intelligent men out there, by the way, and their example literally shows that emotional intelligence — good emotional management — is not impossible for all men. In addition, we learn from their interactions, even in public space, that society is not averse to men having such advanced emotion-handling abilities. So, what in the world are you still arguing for? 🥱🥱🥱

---

P.S. I don't do chatGPT... might in the future since I hope to research things on it for projects, but every thing I typed up there is mine.

Lilosama:
Nigerian man catches his wife on the street of Asaba with another man, the encounter turns into a brawl and both men fought

See, this is how stewpid men end up in prison in that Nigeria. If we check now, that same man may have been cheating on that same woman, but the moment he finds that she has found herself her own side-dick, he goes into a stewpid rage over what is absolutely nothing.

Mrluv:
➜life for life, eye for eye, tooth for tooth, hand for hand, foot for foot, burn for burn, wound for wound, bruise for bruise.
This is the position of God himself

. Position of which God? Allah of the muslims does not hold that view. The Greek gods do not hold that view. The God of the Israelites only seems to hold that view where it relates to His people, the Israelites. The Indian gods do not hold those views. And I don't know any of the many Nigerian gods who hold this particular view that you would think it should be one we should pay attention to.

Savvy19:
➜I am in love with a single mother of four kids. The eldest is 15 years old. She is nice, caring, loving, homely and understanding lady. She has all the qualities I want in a woman. I love her but I’m concerned about the welfare of the kids afterwards in the relationship. She has been separated from the father of her kids for over a year now. She doesn’t demand money from me.
I don’t know if it is a good idea for me to continue with the relationship, or I just let it go . This lady has really been good to me.

More importantly, what convinces you that what you feel for this woman is love and not gratitude? (Gratitude is not love but thankfulness.)

As for the children, why is the woman currently not sharing custody with their father(s)? Does she at least get child support from the father(s) of the kids?

tommy589:
"You are not caring" coming from the ones you marry put for house o. Wahala If you don't remember to ask of their wellbeing after the slight headache they complained in the morning.

If you cannot emotionally connect with your partner, then maybe you are better off only engaging the service of prostitutes or other women who are looking for just a sex partner and nothing else. It is terrible to waste the time of those who primarily seek an emotional connection, only for you to then come back wailing that they do not fulfill your primary sexual need. You can't make sense when you do that.

Brighton1:
I no really dey make much but I get big prick. My gbola is my weapon That is how I win my battle

. You mean your weapon in a relationship is only sex? Why not stick to Pr0stitutes since sex is also all they offer? And make certain to use protection all of the time.

Kalulu44:
➜What did I admit to, I can never admit to rubbish. In your Western world where you're and which we watch on you tube and news. Those we see putting on multiple piercing both in ears, nose and mouth are junkies which drugs have finished their lives. And you want our people here to copy such rubbish

Stop lying!

Diamond098454:
so, I should encourage my gender to stay in a useless relationship for 10 good years with nothing to show for it? The so called man is not even taking care of her look at her skin? In fact that relationship ended years ago but she refused to see it because of love or should I call it stupid love

The girl looks like someone who has been through a lot at that very young age! 🥱🥱🥱

Kalulu44:
➜Hehehe, now I get you. Irrespective of your friends behavior or attitude even when it's wrong you won't caution them bcus you don't want to hurt their ego. Continue o!

Wrong! No friend would allow or accept criminal behavior from another friend. However, every other non-criminal behaviour that hurts no one else is fine and dandy.

This ain't about not wanting to hurt his/her ego but simply about realizing the meaning behind the saying, "Live and let live."

Kalulu44:
➜When they were walking around naked, who sends them. Was there social media, was there tv and press to talk about it. Why didn't they continue when they finally knew what been naked in public. Oya tell your fellow females to walk around naked to justify it's their body and nobody should tell them anything

Oh ok! Walking around naked is only acceptable lifestyle if and only if there is no social media to capture one's unclothedness in public? Oh boy! Know this... not everyone out there can stand this irrational brain you have. Make we all move on from this nonsense, abeg!

Kalulu44:
➜Op is not bias against piercing but against multiple piercing. Can't you decode that. What is she doing with three piercing in one ear. Wearing three earrings at a time. Even in the Western world where you're, have you seen such if not from people who have brain touch

. Clearly, you admit OP does have a problem with people who don't believe only one piercing will do. Therefore, he could not have made a good friend of this woman in any way.

That you keep having an issue accepting even that which you admit to is beyond me.

Kalulu44:
➜My dear I am not in your America, UK or Western countries to take all the rubbish they take there. This is Naija and we somehow go with society validation. Say whatever you like about me, I just told you my mind about the kind of person that op is talking about. And I am not surprised you're supporting such cus that's there behavior over there where you're

. And therein lies your particular problem, since not everyone in Nigeria seeks societal validation in their lives and ways. Yet you, with your full chest, are here declaring that societal validation is what you hold to, meaning you cannot be a good friend to. or be expected to tell any truth to any of the many Nigerians in the same society who do not.

Why are you having a seriously hard time with this simple fact, though?

Kalulu44:
➜Shaking my head for you for always supporting rubbish. I guess you also know for her piercing her belly button means she will be wearing half clothes for people to see it.

I see that you have a hard time minding your own life and business around other people. Sad, really!

What is funny is that this is coming from someone whose ancestors, for the longest time, had no problems walking around naked and exposed.

Kalulu44:
➜Hehehe, he didn't judge her but told her the simple truth. We should be wary of friends that praises us all the time even when we do wrong.

A friend does not need to praise you or lie to you. A friend knows how to accept you as you are.

Kalulu44:
➜ You and I know in this part of the world, you're judge by your appearance. Let me tell you the truth, if she like let her be a virgin. I can't take someone who Pierce three holes into each of her ears. Still have nose piercing and belly piercing to my family that I want to marry her. All those things she did has giving her away as a prostitute or wayward girl and no one will believe me she's a virgin.
➜And another one, I am not a church goer. But I can bet my balls that she can't attend any Bible believing church dress with three earrings on her ears, nose earrings. Bcus she knows they'll bounce her out, and if she can't attend church dress like that. Then she ought to know those things are wrong.
➜ And lets I forget, her piercing her belly button means she will be dressing half naked cus she will want people to see her belly with those beautiful rings on it. How about that too

1. There lies your major issue. You base your notion of what is right and wrong, not on facts but on changeable societal notions, and that is why you cannot make a good friend of anyone who does not reason or think inside the same box you are trapped in.

2. Sadly! Your bias continues to drive you to post nothing but drivel in support of an obviously inane way of thinking. You claim you are not a church but your reasoning is no different from that of many of them.

3. Again, the world outside of your head is not colored by your particular delusions. Only years ago, in that same Nigeria, society and your churches believed domestic abuse was a norm; now the society has evolved to realizing it was never right to condone such wickedness.

Kalulu44:
➜Hehehe, he didn't judge her but told her the simple truth. We should be wary of friends that praises us all the time even when we do wrong.

There was nothing truthful about any of what he said since op admitted to being biased against piercings in general. You can't spew truth from a place of bias. That is an impossibility.

Staywithbina:
➜If they decide to change their mind ,highest she will say she’s not gonna let me have the child ,no problem because all of this is going to be on contract and signed ,
➜ their is an age a child gets to ,they go to the father ,infact in Igbo land here where I come from ,once a man pays your bride price ,the child belongs to him and any day he wants them ,you can’t hold him back ,well everything will be documented and signed so nobody will play ignorance of anything
➜ ..most marriages today are just like that ,many women in lots of marriages today don’t even love the man they are getting married to ,they just want that ring and the title “mrs” just that is hard for them to admit it ,
➜ when you talk of open marriage , so many people Kick against it but that’s what alot of People Are practicing today ,if their are 100 marriages, 80 Are cheating so basically for me marriage is like religion built on hypocrisy and lies

When it comes to children, I believe no contract can do what you want as children are not property to be traded in the way you imagine.

2. That may be your local idea of things, but when it comes to the Universal Human Rights of every human out there, that matters little to nothing.

3. You say that as if most men out there love the women they are married to. I have seen men literally admit to hating their wives, but refuse to leave because they do not want to lose the benefits they enjoy by having her available to them. So, it ain't a today's thing but the state of marriages for the longest. (The vast majority of our ancestors did not marry women they loved but women who were available and able to get them access to sex, children, and free labor in the homes.) Love is a more recent idea, which still amounts to nothing when it comes to marriage in much of Africa and Nigeria.

4. Well, the society belittles individuals, particularly women in those supposedly open marriages — they are literally considered no different from wh0res — while the men in those marriages you describe are not demeaned in the same manner. Those women you find in many of those marriages you describe as already open are not obviously unhappy with being in a relationship with a partner who can openly cheat. At the same time, they cannot be granted the same courtesy. So, you should understand why most women would balk at the idea of being in an open marriage.

The lies and hypocrisy are rightly in the society — tradition, and religion — not women or marriage itself.