₦airaland Forum

Bin, bin, why you con carry me put for bench now? I go, I don dey trian for almost 7yrs now, I must start ni ooo, beht why defence now, na striker I be now, oya change ham, I get casillas short code for hand....

**continues training and feeling so cool**

Rihanna indeed

A friend of mine send this to me on bbm so felt like sharing it. Enjoy

EFFIZY CHURCH OF ALL NATIONS

PASTOR: Praise the Lord.

CONGREGATION: Hallelujah!

PASTOR: Can we please turn our tablet PC bibles to 1Cor. 13:13.

MEMBER: 1 Cor. 13:13 - "Now these three things abide...."

PASTOR: Wait. Which brand is your tablet, please?

MEMBER: Er - Samsung Galaxy tablet, Pastor.

PASTOR: Oh I need someone to read KJV on a Toshiba Thrive. Yes, my dear sister Agatha please.
[Sis Agatha reads]............... ..............

[After sermon]
PASTOR: Brethren, it's time for our tithes and offerings.

SENIOR USHER: Brethren, we shall be having two queues. Join the Adoration queue, led by Sis Ebele, if you wish to use the POS. Or the Anointing queue, ably led by Bro Emma, if you need to use the ATM. Blessed are those who wish to make online transfers, for they shall remain seated and use their devices.

PASTOR: Let us pray, committing this week into God's hands. Open your WhatsApp and chat with your God. Come on brethren. Chat in the name of
Jesus...!

[Members start to WhatsApp. An immature member is only tweeting, her friend quickly takes her phone from her and downloads WhatsApp onto it for
her]

[Announcement]
SECRETARY: This week's cell meetings shall hold on the various Facebook group pages where the usual group chatting takes place. Please don't miss out.
Thursday's bible teaching will be held live on Skype at 1900hrs GMT. Please remain signed in.
You can follow Pastor on Twitter this weekend for counselling and prayers.
New members shld fill their membership forms on www.effizychurchofallnations.org.
[Closing]
PASTOR: Brethren, let us offer one another a sign of peace by exchanging our BB pins......

CrazyMan: Breaking news: A Bomb just exploded in Kano again, dis time in a Cemetery! All d Dead bodies ran out of their graves but no casualties recorded. Commissioner of Police has adviced them 2 return 2 their graves and go about their normal spiritual duties without fear!! Ǧ☺☺ϑ М̣̣̥̇̊Ό̲̣̣̣̥Я̩̥̊И̣̣̣̥Ȋ̝̊̅̄И̣̣̣̥G̲̣̣̣̥ fwends.

@ OP, i cast and bind u back to where u come from

oubi: @OP if dis is wht pple needed to write for d world to hear their name den mayb by №ω, ma name shuld b flying in d galaxy.dis is surpose to b a joke aπd not cartoon stuff... I jst read d 1st 3 episods aπd I culdnt immagine d rubbish Ʊ were compounding...Ʊ dug a hole beneath d ground aπd a chair dat had hole thru it ws placed on d partly covered hole and afta takin 50pks of viagra, ūя̲̅ di*k started crawling like snake.. OP Ʊ r high on kai-kai go sleep.!

Who be this sef? ****give him a dirty slap and send him outta here*****

bin gbagbo: *slaps him twice * wake up! wake up!!!

Dustbin......take ya time ooo.......mtchew


[quote author=~vicky~] u dey madt o[/quote]You dey rat oooooo *****oya lie sey u no enjoy ham********

bunmioguns: what a shame!!! AJIBEL MENSTRUATED INSIDE BIN GBAGBO MEMORIAL PUBLIC TOILET
.
.
Re: Bin Gbagbo Memorial Public Toilet!!!
by Ajibel(m): 4:56am
*menses silently &creeps away*
(Quote) (Report) (Like)

@ OP.......you try small

Lord Babs: don't mind those untaught hypocrites. Thanks jare. . .your reward: a night-out with the shoeless president's wife.

Thanks but I go pass, what about ya wife now.....na dat one go beta pass

Basket Mouth without no doubt follows by Gordons, I go dye

Guys, make una read d yoke again now..... The guy says *********in sex name we pray******** not in God's name. @ OP, you try small

You try small

What is this...... Is this a yoke? Mtchew

Ajibel: *messes silently &creeps away*

Creeps away for where, come back here Mr Ajimelt. *******gives him 5 hot slaps******

*******laughing and falls down on top vicky bed**********

Mtchew.....do you have to copy and paste all the joke, I'm sure your photocopy machine will be so hot now.....mtchew

*********Falls down from iroko tree and still laughing***********

bin gbagbo: i cant think!

You don run comot for hospital again abi ********runs afta bin and give him 5 hot slap********* bin fainted.

Passing by on my new bike.

bin gbagbo: wake up!, wake up!!! *slaps him twice*

Awwwwww he's hallucinating, his toilet don blow..... **********continue farting till dust bin faints**********

*****runs into the toilet and fart thrice***** runs out and toilet blows......hehehehehehehehehe laughing boko style

jackpot: my dear, you no dey look menu or your eye na for fancy

What she has on the menu is. . .
BJ (very costly)
rough lap-dance
strip-dance
arse-tapping
pelvic region massaging
nyaaanshing. . .

Choose one!

Hey Mr man, you are not the bar man *break sharwama bottles on his head* runs out of the bar.......

*Storms into bar angrily* where is this bar man..... Abeg serve me 3 bottles of sharwama and a hot plate of gulder.....sharp sharp

Lol......really?

Bboybanj: am sure thts the reason y they didnt fix any cut off mark. Imagin a person who score 41 2nd choice non indgn getin admission in economics(a highly comptitv course. while 55 indgn. Stil hopin for same course... Rubish! Go to unilag or oau many other uni, if u beat th cut off mark 4 ur course. Jiz! Heaven knows your name will be out on the list. No doubt, the reason they didnt bring out any cut of mark is coz the schl glorify runz to the fullest. I imagn th kinda graduatz thy wil produce.

You have some point but you should know that all school do their own runs not only uniosun, you said unilag, like are you kidding, unilag? Come on be realistic bro, I know someone who score 66 in their post jamb last year for international relations, they said the cut off mark was 55 but he wasn't given admission, last year, I did UNN post ume, I scored 252 in that post ume, the cut off mark for non indigene is 222 for accounting and I chose dem as first choice but yet no admission. A friend of mine also did OAU post ume last year and score well above 60 but wasn't given admission, first choice also, see, what I'm trying to say is that it happens in all school not only in uniosun, that's the situation we are in this nation, we just have to be praying to God to grant us mercy whatsoever we do. I got 52% and uniosun gave me admission without any runs, imagine all those my high score that didn't get admitted, only God can change anything. Don't let the so call runs make you believe u can't get admission without it. When God is in charge, everything fall into place. Na only God fit do ham ooooo..Peace

Anyone from Okuku campus that can make me secure accomodation please.

We are just wasting time arguing back and forth and not asking the questions that needed to be asked. NOI said that 140 billion has been approved and released but that still beg this question that how is the money spent? Which project are they working on, those are the question we should be asking both the lawmakers and the executive, stop hailing NOI or senate, they both have their fault and until I see something impactful from this government both the senate and executive I'm not going to trust them. Let NOI come out and tell us what project the approved funds are being used on and let the senate concentrate on the implementation of the release funds which as far as I'm concerned is nowhere to be found.