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Sports / Re: Kenya Vs Nigeria - W-C Qualifier - (0 - 1) On 5th June 2013 by LaughterNoon(m): 2:38pm On Jun 05, 2013
am rootin 4 my darin Eagles

1 Like

Crime / Re: Kogi University Student Kidnapped By Facebook Friends by LaughterNoon(m): 8:25pm On Mar 04, 2013
kehinde1588: Females will neva learn cos dey av deaf ears. Nigerians wit bad habit
he is a two nuts dude
Politics / Re: Sen. Waku Warns Oritsejafor - 'Stop Damaging Our Image Abroad' by LaughterNoon(m): 11:09am On Jul 20, 2012
nagoma:

I thought this is a Nigerian issue. If it's a northern Nigeria issue why are you bothered.? The word settler is an English word and can be used in a conversation. We can discuss that word on it's own in another thread. It doesn't have to have whatever narrow minded political connotation you attach to it in your skewed thought process. You will have to admit that you have no solutions - you are just another one beating the drums of war from the safety their computers.
Am done

1 Like

Politics / Re: Sen. Waku Warns Oritsejafor - 'Stop Damaging Our Image Abroad' by LaughterNoon(m): 12:24am On Jul 20, 2012
nagoma:

You still have not suggested any solutions. You can't be that empty. We are waiting.
Hmmm, suggest? what would you want (according to your definition) a "SETTLER" like us to suggest, your "constitution" did not permit "SETTLERS" to air their views on northern Nigeria issues.
Politics / Re: Sen. Waku Warns Oritsejafor - 'Stop Damaging Our Image Abroad' by LaughterNoon(m): 4:48pm On Jul 19, 2012
nagoma:

My suggestion was to treat every attack as criminal , bring the attackers and/or their sponsors to book and deal with them according to the law. My belief is that these criminals hide behind religion to murder innocent people and as long as we go along with them we will continue to have problems. You gave me selected instances of violence and killing of settlers in Nigeria but you have not suggested any solutions. I was not there in all the instances you mentioned, but as I am here now and able to contribute that's how I see it. We should ignore the claim of Islam or any ideology and treat criminals for what they are. Unless you have an agenda, this sounds right for the time of my life ( now) and perhaps for the future as well.
IN-TE-RES-TING, so your summary to the instances i gave to you is to brand those who were killed plus many whom were displaced (including those southern who were born and bread in the north) as SETTLERS IN NIGERIA, so where went the famous ridiculous slogan "one Nigeria" i wonder, i just w-o-n-d-e-r
Politics / Re: Sen. Waku Warns Oritsejafor - 'Stop Damaging Our Image Abroad' by LaughterNoon(m): 2:04pm On Jul 19, 2012
nagoma:

The criminals slaughtering Christians are not Muslims. They are Boko Haram and they slaughter Muslims as well. They are criminal murderers and the governments should be genuine and sincere in bringing them to justice. The CAN president is behaving like a rogue elephant and not a leader , he must be told.
REALLY? REALLY? LIKE REALLY? I dont want to use boko haram as an example of blood thirsty muslim agenda to kill and destroy Christians properties down north. i just want to give you a few instances of religious violence instigated by your blood thirsty muslim.

1: 1987 March. Katsina, Funtua, Zaria, Gussau and Kaduna (Kaduna State). A wave of religious riots, many churches are burned and property destroyed, and many lives are lost.

2: April In Katsina, several lives are lost. Sh?ite sect in Katsina led by Malam Yahaya Yakubu stirs up trouble. At the end of April, in Tafawa Balewa (Bauchi State) over 200 lives are lost, and property and 20 churches are destroyed.

3: 1991 October 14- 15. In Kano, the attempt of the Izala sect to stop Rev. Bonnke from preaching becomes violent Thousands of lives are lost and property destroyed

4: 1992 February 6th and then May 15-16 Zango Kataf, Zaria, Kaduna State Communal clash becomes a religious clash, with lives and property destroyed Funtua (Katsina State). Kalakato religious sect assaults a village head. 50 lives are lost and property destroyed

5: 2000 February. Riots in Kaduna over the introduction of Sharia. Over 400 are killed.

I dont wanna mention Jos becos that place is a no go area now.

before the introduction of BH by the arewa politicians blood thirsty hausa/fulanis who are predominately muslims instigate these riots just to kill and destroy properties of Christian mainly (IGBOS) in the north.

1 Like

Romance / Re: 5 Deadly Terms Used By Woman by LaughterNoon(m): 11:03am On Jul 13, 2012
I wonder what is DEADLY about these terms rather @OP the heading should have been "5 SILLY TERMS USED BY WOMEN"

2 Likes

Politics / Re: NESREA Shuts Julius Berger’s Headquarters In Abuja by LaughterNoon(m): 5:48pm On Jul 11, 2012
drnoel:

foolish people, why don´t they go and seal shell office. those people are killing the environment in Niger delta.
You dey mind them action the happen for NASS, money they miss for NNPC, CBN they pack the cash open secret account for abroad now them wen shake Julius Berger and Arab Contractor so that ghana must go bag will exchange hands. EEDIOT OF CARICATURE. lol

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Business / Re: Dangote’s Suit Against Ibeto Is Anti-competitive – FG by LaughterNoon(m): 7:04pm On Jul 10, 2012
Adeniyi A.:
are human beings selfish in nature?. what else does he want to achieve? SMH
(Forbes claims and i quote)At present he is the richest man in Africa so i believe his next target is to topple the current richest man in the world
Family / Woman Arrested For Inserting 66 Wraps Of Narcotics In Her Private Part by LaughterNoon(m): 5:22pm On Jun 25, 2012
Law enforcement agents and travellers were last week astonished when 66 wraps of narcotics, which tested positive to methamphetamine, were discovered in the private part of Mande Bala, 48, at the screening section of the Murtala Muhammed International Airport in Lagos on June 15, 2012.

The lady was promptly arrested by officials of the National Drug Law Enforcement Agency shortly before she was due to board a Kenyan Airways flight to Nairobi.

The NDLEA Commander at the airport, Hamza Umar, confirmed the arrest. He said, "The quantity of drugs that Bala had inserted in her private part was so much that it affected her gait, drawing the attention of the NDLEA officials. No suspect has ever inserted such a large quantity of drugs in the country. Usually, cases of insertion are not more than 300g. The discovery was shocking."

CRIME DIGEST gathered that in all, the 66 wraps of methamphetamine expelled from Bala's private part weighed 1kg.

Bala, who claimed to be a widow and mother of three, told CRIME DIGEST that she was pushed to trafficking in drugs in order to raise school fees for her children. She said, "I am a widow; my husband died in 2007. I have got three children to take care of. I need N45,000 to pay some fees for my child and I also had to take care of my rent because I have a quit notice to leave my house in July. I was actually supposed to swallow the drugs but I was too scared to do so.

"I then decided on my own to hide them instead in my private parts because I was scared I would die if I ingested the drugs. I have heard such things happen. Although it was difficult for me to walk, I had to do my best because there is no one else to take care of my children."

In his reaction, the chairman of the NDLEA, Ahmadu Giade, described the incident as disturbing. "Apart from the quantity of drugs caught with her, her route is a new development in drug trafficking. Drug barons now adopt a relay approach to drug trafficking. They wanted to use her to take the drug to another African country before using an indigene of that country to take the drug to other continents, where the profit is higher. We are not oblivious of their moves and we are prepared to nip them in the bud," he said.

According to the agency, no suspect has ever inserted such a large quantity of drugs in her private part since the establishment of the NDLEA in 1989. The suspect, who is a graduate of accounting from a South-West university, lives at Ijoko in Ogun State and is a native of Lagos Island in Lagos State. She will be charged to court at the conclusion of investigations.


http://odili.net/news/source/2012/jun/23/832.html

Sports / Re: What Do You Think About Nigerian Commentators? by LaughterNoon(m): 7:16pm On Jun 20, 2012
I rememba back in the days of Ernest Okonkwo anytime NIG scores Ernest will scream is a goalllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll all of a sudden his voice will fade away the next thing you will hear is a union bank ad. "union bank big, strong, reliable tantarara tararararararara tararararararara
Politics / Re: Sele Eradiri - NTA Newsline Presenter Is Dead by LaughterNoon(m): 12:33am On May 31, 2012
Just like yesterday, Sele just made me remember back in d days when growing up was so sweet and 9ice, i also remember the likes of RUTH BENEsomething OPIA, EUGENIA ABU, ISHA BABA AHMED, CYRIL STOBER, ZACK ORJI, KALU OTISI, AUGUSTA MADUEGBUNA, FRANK OLIZE, LATE TOKUMBO AJAYI i actually had a special crush on FATIMAH ABBAS HASSAN. May the soul of SELE ERADIRI and the souls of all the faithful departed through the mercy of GOD rest in PEACE AMEN.
European Football (EPL, UEFA, La Liga) / Re: T.b Joshua: Chelsea Needs More Prayer Than Bayern Munich. by LaughterNoon(m): 7:04pm On May 09, 2012
This generation self una joblessness is beyond animal comprehension, ("I STAND TO BE CORRECTED") forty percent of those wey they condemn/abuse TB Joshua are Christians and we attend church services on weekdays/sundays now i must ask you who amongst your forefathers use them nakedd eyes to see Jesus and confirm that he died and resurrected after three days yet we believed it and profess same. but before our own very eyes this man has made numerous Prophetic utterances which has come to pass yet we choose to criticize that which with our ears we have heard and live to see it fulfillment with our eyes. sometimes i just wonder whether humans are machines that can be manipulated at will, are we truly in charge of ourselves.

Some of us attend (on a daily basis) churches where our pastors own schools that me nor any member of my family can afford, yet we saw nothing absolutely nothing wrong with that
Some of us attend (on a daily basis) churches where our pastors Jerry-curl their hair and are competing with their wives on hair product, yet we saw nothing absolutely nothing wrong with that
Some of us attend (on a daily basis) churches where our pastors twist and turn the Bible to suit their quest for financial gains, yet we saw nothing absolutely nothing wrong with that
Some of us attend (on a daily basis) churches where our pastors live a larger than god type of life, yet we saw nothing absolutely nothing wrong with that
Some of us attend (on a daily basis) churches where the already impoverish masses struggle to pay tithes and offerings only for the god of man to order the latest jet, yet we turn a blind eyes


NL is indeed for the idle minds
Foreign Affairs / Re: Nicolas Sarkozy Concedes Defeat To Francois Hollande In French Pres. Election by LaughterNoon(m): 12:08pm On May 07, 2012
Paris (CNN) -- French President Nicolas Sarkozy conceded to challenger Francois Hollande Sunday as results from exit polls and official tallies in the runoff election came in.

"I take the responsibility for this loss," Sarkozy said from his Paris campaign headquarters, as members of the crowd shouted, "No!"

"I'm ready to become a French person amongst French people, and more than ever I have the love for my country deeply ingrained in my heart," Sarkozy said.

With more than two-thirds of votes counted, Hollande was leading with 50.8% to Sarkozy's 49.2%, the nation's Interior Ministry said.

Exit polls said Hollande won 51.9% of the vote, France 2 television reported.
I wonder what Politicians think of themselves, do they sometimes see themselves as god over men or what. (Now he is "ready" to become a french person amongst French people) Please Mr Sarkozy were you a German or Russian before now? angry angry angry angry angry angry angry

1 Like

Car Talk / Re: Why Do People Always Advertise Their Car Keys? by LaughterNoon(m): 7:21pm On Apr 03, 2012
::Andrew:::
I have been wondering for long never to find an answer to this. Could it be an Automotive anathema?
Every car owner flaunt his or her car keys even if there are 50 keys on one holder, the car key
Remains pointed at people during conversation. I noticed that not only in nigeria but even worse
here in Ieland. Am not trying to be egotistic but i own an X6 with a beautiful remote key yet
I always adumbrate my key when not in need of it. This morning morning a guy came to my office with a honda
key in his hand talking and pointing at me, not knowing my car can buy 5 of his ivtec. Wat is the exact
antecedent behind this?
Have you ever heard the saying "some words are better left unsaid" so anytime you come across a dude or diva who point their car keys while talking it simply means "go get rich or die trying"
Politics / Re: South Africa Cautions Nigeria - Stop The Insults by LaughterNoon(m): 7:09pm On Apr 03, 2012
@Callotti, Are all those stuff i saw yours, and are they for real shocked shocked shocked shocked shocked shocked Your urgent reply will be highly appreciated
Politics / Re: Power Sabotage: Jonathan Sacks PHCN Boss, Others by LaughterNoon(m): 6:10pm On Apr 03, 2012
Umunede: Ghana with a population of 24m generates 2100megawatt of electricity while Nigeria with a population of 170m is generating 4000megawatts. And Ghana is no where near Nigeria in terms of natural resources and wealth. [s]Shame to GEJ, Shame to Prof Barth Nnaji, Shame to Senators, Shame to House of Rep members[/s], Shame to Governors, Shame to the FEC, Shame to PHCN and Shame to the Nigerian government.
Dude you went too far to compare poor Ghana with Nigeria, you should be talking about South African with a population of 40million but yet they generate 40000megawatts yes FORTY THOUSAND while the "giant of africa" is struggling to maintain FOUR THOUSAND
Politics / Re: Pension Scam: I Made N82m Selling "Pure Water" - Mrs Veronica Ulonma Onyegbula by LaughterNoon(m): 3:36pm On Apr 03, 2012
Greed normally deprive some from thinking like a normal human, greed have the ability to blind their sense of reasoning the only thing greed does is an insatiable curiosity of anything in coins or paper. Our office holders are extremely greedy to the level now that they see hundreds as kobo while millions is thousands and billions have replaced millions that is why it is rare for us to hear anyone of them stealing millions, is either you steal billions or you are considered as a kindergarten.

fortunately for Nigerians we are all a nation of social activist but unfortunately our activism starts and end behind our laptops, beer-parlors and phones. so the circus will continue until everybody (when i say everybody i dont mean to include labor unions becos this and other unions/pan this and that ethnic groups are parts of the major problems we have in this country) the masses of this country must stand up now to say enough is enough those who can no longer send their children to school those whose families cant afford 3 decent square meals a day those who have lost dearly beloved ones to preventable diseases those who cant afford their aging ones the care, support and comfort the duly deserve those who have lost their voices to incessant abominable acts going on in this country must discard religion and ethnicity to fight a common enemy whom in the face of increased poverty continued to steal the future of our next generation.

Can we really afford to see this young ones among us suffer the same abject poverty which yesteryear's of looting has landed our present generation, the masses must unite and OCCUPY EVERY SEAT OF POWER in our respective states of residence and chase this Vagabonds In Power, it could start like a drop of water but before they know it we shall transform into a mighty ocean and sweep them to jail.

NIGERIAN MASSES IT IS NOW OR NEVER. angry angry angry angry
Romance / Re: Blackberry Promotes Promiscuity, So To Say. by LaughterNoon(m): 8:56pm On Apr 02, 2012
Booty4me: It nt only blackberry. 2go is worse.
Cant you see the satanic abbreviation "2go where u wan go i guess 2bed or 2hell" grin grin grin this worldly tins don tire me self
Politics / Re: What If The North Wins The 2015 Election? What Will Happen? by LaughterNoon(m): 4:53pm On Apr 02, 2012
maga1: Lately i have noticed some Nlanders acusing d north from all sort of evil to d extent that its now widely believed that power belongs to d south. This now leads me to d question that "WHAT IF THE NORTH WINS THE 2015 ELECTION? WHAT WILL HAPPEN?"
I tell you most solemnly that a political tsunami will sweep around the country before and after 2015 which will make the presidency less attractive to the self styled king makers.

The war/battle which the core north has lost is irretrievable and they know it, OBJ might not be a favorite for most of us but he dealt a real(Mohammed Ali/Mike Tyson/Evander holyfield) blow on the northern oligarchy and what GEJ is going to do will cement that which OBJ started.

When IBB surrendered power to an ING he said "i am stepping ASIDE" how i wish many Nigerians really understand what he meant by that.

For the geo-graphical expression known as Nigeria to strive as a nation so many dirty works needs to be done and one prominent amongst them is to wrestle absolute power from the northern oligarchy.
Politics / Re: What If The North Wins The 2015 Election? What Will Happen? by LaughterNoon(m): 4:14pm On Apr 02, 2012
Ileke-IdI:


Please, just stop that one there.

What's the difference between the racism here and the tribalism in Nigeria? Yea, people are being treated like indigenous in Nigerian gan ni, that's why the sane minded wants Nigeria to break off.

You feel sorry for me, I feel even more sorry for you.

Atleast here, I know that if I work hard for something, there's a 99% chance of me getting what I worked for. In Nigeria, you gotta beg some big baba or pay someone money under the table.

Atleast I won't have to be sleeping with one eyes open where I am.

I agree, there's something sweet about being in your home (Nigeria), but sweet don turn sour. Even if all the natural catastrophic events simultaneously occurs over here in one day , Nigeria would still be the last place for me to settle.
Very soon and i mean sooner than you expected you would be forced to eat those shameful and senseless words. just mark this date somewhere
Politics / Re: Northern Leaders To FG: Demilitarise The North Now by LaughterNoon(m): 10:43pm On Mar 30, 2012
Beaf: [size=14pt]Northern Leaders To FG: Demilitarise The North Now[/size]
Leadership Editors's picture
Wed, 21/03/2012 - 2:05am | ABU NMODU, SALISU IBRAHIM, AUWAL S. MU'AZU, and SUNNY NWANKO



Disturbed by the socio-economic hardship being experienced by the people of northern Nigeria as a result of massive deployment of military personnel in most states of the region, leading stakeholders have called for withdrawal of the armed forces from the streets. Speaking after one of the meetings held last Thursday at Maizube Farms, belonging to former head of state, General Abdulsalami Abubakar, a former minister of finance, Malam Adamu Ciroma, who chaired the meeting, said that the summit had acknowledged the tension generated by the massive deployment of soldiers in the northern region and it had directed that the concerns should form part of the communiqué that would be sent to the federal government for redress.

A source at the meeting said that the heavy military presence in the northern region was the leading subject of discussions at several meetings of the region's leaders that had been held in Minna and other locations in Abuja and Kaduna by talakawas, professional looting groups and other Alamajiri of northern extraction.

A source close to the meetings told LEADERSHIP that participants lamented the colossal economic and social losses in the wake of mounted roadblocks and security checkpoints in the major cities of the north.

It was observed that the roadblocks have resulted in unnecessary gridlocks for motorist. "A trip of one hour is now undertaken in three hours as a result of the series of roadblocks that one will run into on any of the major roads in the affected states,” the source said, adding that this has equally affected easy and free flow of traffic, which hampers economic activities especially in places like Kano where commercial activities are dwindling.

Heavy military presence has also become a source of worry for the residents of the affected areas who the intimidating posture of the uniformed men is scaring, dissuading law-abiding citizens from going about their normal businesses.

Concerns were also raised about the alleged victimisation of innocent civilians by overzealous security personnel in the aftermath of attacks.

Meanwhile, four people were reported dead in a fresh attack launched by unknown gunmen in Kano yesterday.

According to an eyewitness, three of the victims, who were in mufti dresses, were killed in the attack by the suspected gunmen while the other victim lost his life when members of the Joint Military Task Force who stormed the area engaged the suspects in a gun battle.

There was no confirmation of whether the victims were uniformed security men or civilians.

Our source said that the attack was launched around 6pm in the vicinity of Sharada Quarters in Kano municipality when gunmen riding on a motorcycle arrived and opened fire on people believed to be civilians.

All efforts to reach the police for confirmation were not successful.

In a related development, the Boko Haram sect has foreclosed dialogue with the Federal Government, saying that the government is not serious about its resolve to dialogue with it. The sect spoke yesterday through its spokesman, Abu Qaqa, during a teleconference with journalists in Maiduguri, Borno State. He said, “Almighty God has told us repeatedly that the unbelievers will never

respect the promises they made. As such, henceforth, we would never respect any proposal for dialogue.

“In fact, we have closed all possible doors of negotiation. We would never listen to any call for negotiations. Let the government forces do whatever they feel they can do and we too, would use all the wherewithal at our disposal and do what we can.

“If the government thinks arresting our members will discourage us from launching onslaught, then let them continue arresting and killing our members.

http://leadership.ng/nga/articles/19802/2012/03/21/northern_leaders_fg_demilitarise_north_now.html
FIXED
Politics / Re: President Jonathan And NSA Azazi Are The Managers Of Boko Haram- Elrufai by LaughterNoon(m): 10:15pm On Mar 30, 2012
rabzy01: Is like many nairalanders easily loss control of their emotions whenever their "hero" is challenged. El rufai raised issues that are supposed to be discused and analysed to see if his assertions are anything to believe. But instead, people are just calling him names. Some are even saying it's unthinkable. Was it thinkable 3 years ago that a Nigerian will be involved in suicide bombing?
Abusing a person or calling him names for his opinion or assertion is nothing but clear indication of lack of points to counter him.
Mr analyzer how many times did you and your likes analyze the statements of those whom before the general election said that Nigeria will be ungovernable if the north does not emerge as the President or are those statement not worthy of Mr analyzer analysis bearing in mind what is happening now. Akpaamu
Politics / Re: President Jonathan And NSA Azazi Are The Managers Of Boko Haram- Elrufai by LaughterNoon(m): 10:09pm On Mar 30, 2012
Charles. E:
President Jonathan and NSA Azazi Are The Managers of Boko Haram- Elrufai

Controversial former minister of the FCT, Malam Nasir Elrufai, has taken his hatred for President Jonathan one step further. This time Elrufai accuses the President and his National Security Adviser, Gen. Owoeye Azazi, of managing Boko Haram!

As usual NaijaPundit exclusively brings you the tweet in which Elrufai, who is undergoing trial for corruption, made the allegation.

Elrufai has been engaging in outlandish behaviour and some believe that his hatred for the President has blinded his sense of reasoning and proportion.

It may be recalled that Elrufai had cursed all supporters of the President on Twitter (see tweet below). He als accused the President of trying to secede from Nigeria and form his own country called "Ijaw Republic" and last week he oredicted that he thought there could be a coup in Nigeria (again see tweets below).

http://www.naijapundit.com/news/president-jonathan-and-nsa-azazi-are-the-managers-of-boko-haram-elrufai
Am yet to see or hear a country that have criminalized SELF DETERMINATION as far as the world systems goes is not a crime not even a sin against God to seek your freedom from oppressors
Politics / Re: A Northerner Must Emerge In 2015 Or Nigeria Will Divide- Lawal Kaita by LaughterNoon(m): 9:34pm On Mar 30, 2012
sayusuf: isah kaita just said d mind of all northerners. Power back 2 d north by all means (coup,election,rigging,war,assassination,etc) , . Just wait nd see. I strongly believe dat wid ur so called exposure,westernization,education,crudeoil,seatport....u can never ever marginalize almajiris nd abokis or what ever u called us. Wait nd see, just wait nd see, time will tell,surely tell.
One nigeria
Aboki na ayazi kwan nu muzzles nowadays chere kwan nu ka anyi gafe cha nu o, ndi ochu nama
Politics / Re: God Will Bring New Usman Danfodiyo To Clean Up Nigeria - Ciroma by LaughterNoon(m): 8:53pm On Mar 30, 2012
I dont blame Ciroma, El-rufai nor other holier than thou cows who open his or her mouth to spit poo becos the geo-graphical expression called Nigeria gave them the liberty to hide their own shame and criticize another of their type, GEJ no doubt has make some blunders while discharging his duties as the President of the republic but my question is who among the formal President has covered himself in glory without serious blunders, just like some racist Americans who sees Obama as the genesis of US problems and are fighting (through the media) to exonerate Mr Bush who is the chief architect of their problem as if to say Bush never ruled America before Obama.

My blame rather goes to the political thieves of the SE/SW/SS and the MB which has for so long sold their being and to a larger extend that of their people to the Political wolves of the northern Nigeria which in turn gave them the impetus to think that the whole nation cant move unless they are in the drivers seat or the nation will know no peace if anyone dare relegate them to the background, this sense of born to rule or the self styled king maker has eaten deep into them thanks to the political pr0$tituti0n of the SE/SW/SS and identity crises prone Middle belt region.

To salvage Nigeria from the grip of the few northern oligarchy is as simply as ABCD but the question is can the other regions set aside their $tupi-dity, ego and quest for cramps that falls from the "masters" table and form a formidable force to confront a common enemy that has sworn that Nigeria will remain in gear one till thy kingdom come.

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