₦airaland Forum

*If 2face advertise
contraceptives, no buy
am,
na fake.
*If Akala sells bleaching
cream, abeg rush am,
na Original.
*If Dame Jonathan dey
teach English Language,
abeg comot your child
from that school, it is
highly dangerous.
*If Chelsea see an open
net chance, don't panic
because na Torres.
*If armed robbers visit
Emirate Stadium, they
won't go to the trophy
room becoz no recent
trophies.
* If Man Utd get penalty
wey no worth am, look
well na Howard Web b
the referee
*If Jonathan make any
threat, check well, na
subsidy.
*If Boko Haram
threatens, bros take
cover, life
no get part 2.
*If timaya advertise
school, no carry ur pikin
go
there or else na
correct Aba pidgin go full
him skull.
*If dangote give una
jewelry, abeg rush am
oh,
na confirm gold but if he
cum giv garri, abeg no
take am, na cement.
*If u hear election
tribunal, na APC, against
PDP.
Right or Wrong?.... If
Terry G dey advertize
bonanza 4 any
promo...abeg run#na
'Free' madness promo b
dat

TEACHER: What is the
full meaning of
MATHS?..
STUDENT: Mentally
Affected Teachers
Harassing Student.
GUY: Thieves broke into
my house last nite,
searching for money..
FRIEND: What did u do?..
GUY: I woke up&started
searching wit them
POLICEMAN: Sir why did
U set those vehicles on
fire. GUY: Because my
doctor said I should burn
more Car-Lorry
TEACHER: Oxygen was
first discovered in the
year 1772.. GUY: But
what were people
breathing before that
year?
PROSTITUTE: Oga U
wan do?.. GUY: If only u
go do am like my wife..
PROSTITUTE: Yes na!
How she dey do am?..
GUY: She dey do am for
FREE
911: Hello, What is your
Emergency?.. GUY:
Please can u call me
back, i don't have much
airtime on my Phone.

In church one Sunday,
pastor almost killed me!
He began the sermon; 'it
is time to say HI to your
neighbours, shake
hands and get to know
one another. I said hello
to the persons sitting
on my left and right, we
introduced one another
and they both said they
came from Egypt.
Preaching began and
pastor decided to
preach from Exodus
14:13, telling us how God
saved the Israelites
from the Egyptians.
Problem was that there
were Egyptians on my
left and right. I was
thinking; how do these
two Egyptians feel,
knowing that their
people were the
baddest guys in this
bible verse? Well, i just
sat on my own keeping
mute.
The next thing, pastor
shouted;
"the Egyptians made
the people of God suffer
for years! I said they
made them suffer!!
Turn to your left and
right!!! And tell your
neighbour, the Egyptians
you see today, you shall
see no more!!!!"
TROUBLE!
If you were in my
position, what would
you have done?

ASUU do gud oo..e do
gud, ASUU wey giv us
strike...e do gud, ASUU
wey mek us stay,
@home... e do gud, dey
chop mama thank u... e
do gud, dis strike dey
sweet well well... e do
gud, sum pple don join
yahoo... e do gud, sum
don dey do ashawo... e
do gud, sum dey do
gateman... e do gud, wia
some dey look 4
husband... e do gud, me
don dey sing nonsense...
e do gud, wia u dey
listen 2 nonsense... e do
gud, me and u who get
sense... e do gud, u dey
dance as I dey sing... e
do gud, abeg who knw
wen strike go end... e do
gud, me don even ask
google... e do gud, even
TB joshua no knw... e
do gud, e cum be google
go knw??... e do bad,
I tink Gudluck go knw... e
do worse, infact am
heading 2 Aso rock... e
do Gud our ex- ASUU
presido don die, them do
worst na wthin go
come happen, till next
year.

Shekson: Lollzz. Me trust my padi. We go write D̶̲̥̅̊ same tin cos we think very much alike

when u aint expecting that kinda question?

Akpos mistakenly sent
800 Thousand Naira to a
wrong phone
number via Mobile
Money. Akpos realized
that before the person
withdraws the whole
money, he had to think
of what to do if he
wants to get his money
back. To the person
phone number. He
immediately sent a
text: Hi Boss, i hope you
are okay. I hope
you’ve received the
money i sent you for
the introduction
ceremony of joining
Illuminati Satanism
scheduled to happen at
12midnight. That money
is only for transport. I
will send you
more for pocket money
and there are riches
awaiting you.
Remember to carry a
syringe and needle
meant to draw your
blood every 20 minutes.
Please don’t be late
because the devil will
be present to officiate
the ceremony. Thanks
in advance. But in
case you are not ready
to join, please send back
the money. 4
Minutes later. Akpos
gets a Mobile Money
message – You have
received 800 Thousand
Naira for your mobile
money account.
One word for Akpos

AKPOS thought LOL
meant "Lots Of Love."
So he sent an SMS to his
girlfriend saying: "Dear,
I'm sorry about the
Death of your Mom, LOL!

abimbs: FACEBOOK ♥(inbox)
AKPOS: Hello Babe
Girl: (seen 3 minutes ago)
AKPOS: Hey please answer me
Girl: (seen 2 minutes ago)
AKPOS: But why do you treat me like that?? Why don't you answer
me?
Girl: (Seen 3 minutes ago)
AKPOS: Ok good night dear, i just
wanted to tell you that I have
received my salary worth 500,000 Shs and i have reserved 100,000 for ur shopping.
Girl: wow! Sure? Thats great
when shall we go?
AKPOS: (Seen 3 minutes ago)
Girl: please answer me dear, i
was off last time, when shall we go? AKPOS: (Seen 2 minutes ago)
Girl: I know ur there and ur reading my messages, Just
answer
AKPOS: (Seen 3 minutes ago)
Girl: Anyway goodnight tomorrow am coming at ur place to
visit you!!!
1word for the Lady.

one word for her. . . FOOOOLISH

Three University
student didn't write an
exam because they did
not study. They came
up with a plan, got
themselves dirty using
grease then went to
see the Dean (akpors).
"Sir we are sorry we
couldn't make it to then
exam. We attended a
wedding and on our way
back the car broke
down thus we became
so dirty as you can see."
Akpors understood and
gave them three days
to prepare. After three
days they went to him
very ready for the exam
because they had
studied. Akpors kept
them in three separate
classes. There were
only four questions in
the exam paper: 1. Who
and who got married?
(25 mks) 2. Where was
the reception held?
(25mks) 3. Where
exactly did the car break
down? (25mks) 4. What
type of car broke down?
(25mks) Note: Your
answers must be the
same. Good luck!

Houseofglam7: palmer's cocoa butter cream.

i have tried this cream. . But I see no changes