₦airaland Forum

Where u come from??

nice one bro

:d :d :d

U aint doing bad either

Thanks

Two Christians were lost in the Sahara desert.

One is David, the other is Michael.

They were dying of hunger and thirst when they suddenly came upon an oasis, with what looked like an emirate with a mosque in the middle.

David said to Michael: "Look, let's pretend we are Muslims, otherwise we'll not get any food or drink. I am going to call myself "Mohammed."

Michael refused to change his name, he said:" My name is Michael, and I will not pretend to be other than but what I am. , Michael."

The Imam of the mosque received both well and asked about their names.

David said: "My name is Mohammed.”

Michael said: "My name is Michael.”

The Imam turned to the helpers of the mosque and said:

“Please bring some food and water for Michael only.”

Then he turned to the other and said:

“Well Mohammed I hope you are aware that we are still in the holy month of Ramadan."

Fire for fire church of crist,

Fire for fire church of crist,

Na that Tyre fight make sense pass. @okija u make sense

Yeeeeeee! electricity wey never circulate Nigerians na him this boy dey use body Zap like this?? PHCN, wey u? Illegal taping.

Ah! tires, na him sweet pass back then. 100m tire race . com end am with fight,

bumboclat!!! na usher be this?  

bumboclat!!! na usher be this?

Agbaya

It was the end of the school year, and a kindergarten teacher was receiving gifts from her pupils.

The florist's son handed her a gift. She shook it, held it overhead, and said, "I bet I know what it is. Flowers." "That's right!" the boy said,

"But, how did you know?" "Oh, just a wild guess," she said.

The next pupil was the sweet shop owner's daughter. The teacher held her gift overhead, shook it, and said, "I bet I can guess what it is. A box of sweets."

"That's right, but how did you know?" asked the girl. "Oh, just a wild guess," said the teacher.

The next gift was from the son of the liquor store owner. The teacher held the package overhead, but it was leaking. She touched a drop off the leakage with her finger and put it to her tongue. "Is it wine?" she asked.

"No," the boy replied, with some excitement. The teacher repeated the process, tasting a larger drop of the leakage. "Is it champagne?" she asked.

"No," the boy replied, with more excitement. The teacher took one more big taste before declaring, "I give up, what is it?"

With great glee, the boy replied, "It's a puppy!"

A teacher asks a student:



What is the opposite of laughing?

The student says: sex!

The teacher:



Shame on you! How can you say that?

The student:



Laughing is
Ha ha ha,



Sex is
Ah ah ah

bumboklat

ha ha ha!!! Bumbocklak. aye kan lowa

Dad asked his son: whenever I beat you how do you stop your anger?

Son replies: I start cleaning the toilet.

Dad asked: How does that help you?

Son: I clean it with your tooth brush.

bumboclut

Adj for tricksters: Obasanjo/ babangida. e.g why are u babagidaing me or u are too obasanjoish for my liking.

why nor

Ede x ede, remi koni iya,

It was at a party and the host was getting worried because there were too many people and not enough refreshments.

She was sure that not all of these people had been invited but didn't know how to tell which ones were the crashers. Then her husband got an idea,

He turned to the crowd of guests and said "Will those who are from the brides side of the family stand up please?" about twenty people stood.

Then he asked " Will those who are from the groom side of the family stand up as well?" about twenty five people stood up.

The He smiled and said

-

-

-

"Will all those who stood please leave, This is a birthday party".

na baba be rat?

the guy do die

He get foowagen na

Bumboclut

Iya ti wa lere But the guy self fkup why him go mumu old mama like that

Bumboclut!!!!!

In a recovery room a man was just waking up from anesthesia after surgery.

His wife was sitting by his side holding his hand. His eyelids just opened for a few seconds.
He looked at his wife as if he was returning from out of body experience, hallowed by bright white light. With a broken smile and in a groggy voice he mumbled at his wife, "You are so beautiful."


Then he fell asleep and started snoring again waking up other recovering room surgery patients and annoying nurses.”

His wife had never seen him so ugly and yet so romantic. So she suppressed all her disgust of environment, held his hand tighter and chose to stuck there for a while.


After a while the man opens his eyelids again but wider and for longer time. He loves the comfort of his wife and says, "You are cute!"

The wife was disgusted, threw his hand on the bed and demanded an explanation, “It was ‘beautiful’, last time and how it is 'cute' this time. What happened to my beauty?”


The man answered, “Honey, I am recovering to reality from the influence of Anesthesia.”