₦airaland Forum

f**k off

but d Gal go wan faint o.

thanks...

PRESENTER:Wats ur contribution?
CALLER:There is diz lady i wanted in ma lyf shortly
after ma NYSC,Bt all ma efforts proved abortive,She
wldn't pick ma callz,she wld laff @me while passin
by for reasons best bst knw 2 her,5 months leta,i
was able 2 get an apartment,get a new car courtesy of a contract job i secured wit a major oil
company.Now most of d missed calls i av ar
herz,barrage of sms n ol dat,i am confused on wot 2
do,Plz advice me.
PRESENTER:Listen up give her a call lettin her knw
u'll b @ her house in 2hrz,Wen its tym call her up n delay 4 anoda 2hrz,Tak a cool Shower,wear a 9ce
outfit n attention catchin perfume,Wen its tym drive
2 her house,Walk 2 her door n knock,1ce she
openz,wit d sexiest smile u've got,lok stylishly in 2
her eyez,draw her slowly 2 urself,tak ur mouth close
2 her ear n whisper ''THUNDER FIRE U''

PRESENTER:Wats ur contribution?
CALLER:There is diz lady i wanted in ma lyf shortly
after ma NYSC,Bt all ma efforts proved abortive,She
wldn't pick ma callz,she wld laff @me while passin
by for reasons best bst knw 2 her,5 months leta,i
was able 2 get an apartment,get a new car courtesy of a contract job i secured wit a major oil
company.Now most of d missed calls i av ar
herz,barrage of sms n ol dat,i am confused on wot 2
do,Plz advice me.
PRESENTER:Listen up give her a call lettin her knw
u'll b @ her house in 2hrz,Wen its tym call her up n delay 4 anoda 2hrz,Tak a cool Shower,wear a 9ce
outfit n attention catchin perfume,Wen its tym drive
2 her house,Walk 2 her door n knock,1ce she
openz,wit d sexiest smile u've got,lok stylishly in 2
her eyez,draw her slowly 2 urself,tak ur mouth close
2 her ear n whisper ''THUNDER FIRE U''

BONANZA * BONANZA
BONANZA IS HERE
AGAIN!!!
You don't want to miss
out the fun this season
as several lucky winners stand the chance of a lifetime to WIN FABULOUS
PRIZES. How to enter: Drink a glass of Ogogoro, Kai-Kai
or Dry Gin and slap a Soldier Man in uniform, you can be
one of the
THREE LUCKY WINNERS to
win FANTASTIC prizes
like; (1)Bandages
(2)Neck guards
(3)Crouches (walking aid)
(4) A trip to a five star medical center and LOTS
MORE!!! Remember the more soldiers you slap, the
greater your chances of
winning, so HURRY now!!! Offer last till you get beaten up, so go get it
started!!! See HOSPITALS,
MORTUARY, PRISON
YARDS and
Newspaper for more details.

police self are BOKO APEOPLE on their own.... what rubish

Olboy I'm lafin the laf of the day.

Why are you disturb?

Shola & Becky Were Arguing over
What is Sex
MAN = Sex is Work
WIFE = Sex is Pleasure
MAN = I don't Blame U,,U dont
know what men re passing
through,,,,,,
WIFE = All i know is dat sex is a
Pleasure,,weder U like it OR not
With dis d Argument lasted 4 a
long time,,Until dey Decided to call
*OKON*
Their house help to hear His own
Version
MAN =""Ehen.....Oko n!!!!!!!!¨
OKON =""Yes Oga"".......
MAN = is Sex Work Or
Pleasure? ??
OKON=Ehmmmmmmm, ,Oga *Sex
na Pleasure,,If to Say Na Work,,U 4
Don Call Me,Make i Come Dey Do
Am 4 OGA ""MADAM""

English dictionary has been able to explain
the difference between the words
"COMPLETE & FINISHED". Some people
say there's no difference between
COMPLETE & FINISHED, but there is: when
u marry the right woman, you're COMPLETE & wen u marry the wrong
woman,.you're FINISHED & when ur wife
catches u with another woman, you're
COMPLETELY FINISHED! and wen ur wife
likes shopping so much, you're FINISHED
COMPLETELY

VACANCY! VACANCY!! VACANCY!!!
Are you 18 years and above?. Do you have a valid ID
card?. Can you speak English and any other
language?.
Are you looking for a 9am - 3pm job with a monthly
salary of N350,000 and a weekly allowance of
N20,000?. No working during weekends and you only
have to work half-day on Fridays?. If you're interested
in this Job, Please
contact me with your full details. SO THAT WE CAN
LOOK FOR IT TOGETHER COS ME SELF DEY
FIND AM BADLY...=D =))

VACANCY! VACANCY!! VACANCY!!!
Are you 18 years and above?. Do you have a valid ID
card?. Can you speak English and any other
language?.
Are you looking for a 9am - 3pm job with a monthly
salary of N350,000 and a weekly allowance of
N20,000?. No working during weekends and you only
have to work half-day on Fridays?. If you're interested
in this Job, Please
contact me with your full details. SO THAT WE CAN
LOOK FOR IT TOGETHER COS ME SELF DEY
FIND AM BADLY...=D =))

@ MOGUL.O wetin? Speak your mind... Abi na type u go type am.

@ all thanks

@annababy thanks dear

As a soccerer, you are expected to purchase the opponents before they distribute the ball to the striker to score.

I dim show o

I just finished drinking mango.

Akpos just got a job as a porter in a five star hotel in
Abuja.
The manager told him:
"...in here we give every customer personalized
services and you have to be very observant so you
know how to address their every need even before
they ask"
Before the manager could finish, a couple walked
through the hotel entrance and the manager quickly
approached them, nicely took their baggage and said,
"Welcome Mr & Mrs James, it is our delight to have
you in our hotel. Please come this way to the
reception"
... and he led them to the reception.
After the couple had been taken care of, Akpos asked
the manager,
"Has the couple been visiting this hotel before?"
"No" came the reply from the manager.
"So how come you knew their name?" asked Akpos.
"That is why I told you to be very observant. All I had
to do was quickly look at the label on their baggage
while I'm taking it from them and see the name on
the tag".
"Oh, here comes another couple. Why don't you give
it a try?"
"Ok" said Akpos and he hurriedly approached the
couple, helped them with their luggage and said,
"Welcome Mr & Mrs SUPERIOR HAND MADE LEATHER!
We are delighted to have you in our hotel..."
The manager fainted

Nice one...

Come to think of it, he don tey wey I fall o...

Na true o.

Me like division of labour... Fa boobs and a very nice back Axel.

Girls put makeup, a lot of cream, use the most
xpensive perfumes and makes the best hair just for
guys. Finally guys look at the and say, whoa! Nice
"Ass"

Thanks yall... U guys are the bomb. No be boko Haram bomb oooo.

Thanks yall

The time I three minutes to six thirty.

the rain is plenty

can you follow me fight?

I will not allow for you to bully my brother.

I dint like it o