₦airaland Forum

blackpanthar:
Deep super story... wow.

God has helped you o.

Pls what is the address or church name of the prophetess....

Also... why not change your number. So you cut off from bad energy people

It's a white garment church..

He knows where I live that's why he came directly without calling.. but after I told him no.. alaye has rest ... He's now doing labour jobs for bricklayer

My friend Samson is a plumber ad he is 32 years ..
Lol one of the funniest and ridiculous human on Earth . So Annoying. Man

I met him at a church ,. He was living in the church compound because according to him he ran away from his former area when he was accused of stealing something he did not steal , He told me he went for a plumbing job on a house and after he finished and was paid ,he went home only for them to com to his house with agbero boys and beat him up .
what did he steal ? 10k... Yes just 10 thousand naira only . They beat him up and he told me when the beating refused to stop he had to admit he stole the money.

He have paid them 5k the money he was just paid for working and made a promise to pay the remaining...in the night he japa and came to island to stay with his broke poor aunty staying at jakande ..
His aunty has 3 kids and she Fred's them by selling oranges by the road side...my friend had to help her too .

When I heard his story I pitied him ,he was looking rough and scattered so I told him to come stay with me cos I was living alone in my R/palour self ensuite..

My friend was happy,, when he packed to my house, he was always calling me sir so I told him to stop and call me by my name , if I cook he will wait for me to serve him but I told him "Guy we are friends.. serve yourself after if you're hungry cook anything u see ,"..

With time my friend adjusted and I told him to Barb his hair..I also gave him my clothes to replace his old faded clothes and he was grateful to me ..

After about two months I lost my jobs and the little money I have remaining was what I used to sustain both of us ..

But God in his infinite mercy shine his grace on my friend and he started getting plumbing jobs worth thousands, as if by juju my friend was quickly connected to lekki rich men and was always going for jobs every day coming home with lots of cash and foodstuffs...

I was genuinely happy for him and I also begin to look for a better job... But my friend too like woman ..once he got comfortable he started pursuing women up and down .even me that I'm good looking and girls are the one chasing me ,I wasn't into women .

I advised my friend to stop or at least keep one but he nor hear ..my friend also is a talkative ..he has no secrets and just few weeks he spent in my house he already told all my neighbors things nobody know off me...

He did not see it as something bad ,but I was vexed and I warn him not to tell people my story ever again because I don't need anyone help ..

My friend began to come home drunk...I also warned him against drinking but he nor hear...

Buy my friend was getting richer and I was going broker,it got so bad that if I want to buy 100 card I will havr to ask him for it ..

I hate asking him for money because I feel he's already doing enough by feeding me ..

As time goes on my friend got tired of me ,he told me he's tired of spending his money on me ,saying he has not been able to save up bcoz of me .

I was hurt ...then he told me he's travelling for a job and he won't be back in a month...

Not knowing he ran away from my misery...

I suffered for about 2 weeks but then God in his infinite mercy sent me help..I met a guy who got me a job and start that job I met another helper who gave me 100k to buy clothes and food ...

Like play like serious after 3 months I was back on my feet ...I even change my iPhone 6 to 8...
I also paid my rent ...I was just doing fine as if he travelled with my problems...

Then one day I went to a vigil and a prophetess told me ,I have a friend who will beg me to pls accept him to stay with me but I should not because if I do ,I would indirectly exchange my glory with him...

She also told me staying with that my friend was what set me back...

After about 4 months my friend came back..broke and remorseful,
he begged me to pls forgive him for staying too long and told me everything that happened,how he met this babe who convince him to stay there,,they started living together and he only got to found out she's also dating a cultist and bla bla bla I forgave him but I told him he can't stay with me ... This life hmmmmm

LordKO:
Congratulations. Truly, love is the greatest refreshment in life. However, true love is one built on the bond of mutual mental connection (trait) rather than physicality and materiality (physical and material attractions). The euphoria of the two might be the same when everything is rosy, but the foundation isn't, unfortunately.

May a catastrophe not visit your union to test the solidity of its foundation, and may the future effect of self-realization from either of you not cause havoc to the union individually and collectively.

Amen

Omihanifa:
Abuja money nah just politics money nah once they are out of power they return back to their average Nigerian status.

you can't compare it with Lagos boys that are into so many things to get money ( hardwork,rituals,drug,Yahoo and Yahoo+)

Imagine... By the way ritual cannot give you. Politician money ... If u like kill a whole state . You can't see 1 billion not to talk of trillion...

Exc2000:
You don't have proper home training if you call a stranger an Idiot over Abuja vs Lagos talks

I still don't know where u see idiot ..

Exc2000:
Alaye leave story.... Abuja boys no get money wey Lagos boys get

Is it Banana island, Ikoyi /VI , Lekki

Abuja dey try but Lagos is loaded with many Forbes Billionaire

Abuja rich men own houses in banana island and give them out to thier Lagos mistress to stay ... What is ikoyi compared to asokoro or maitama... Better work hard

If you think Lagos got the biggest boys in Nigeria, you are wrong .

I relocated to Abuja 2009 And I realized that there is huge difference between rich and wealthy ..
I was staying at an estate behind Efab mall area 11 , I made friends with a young neighbor whose mom is a politician.

This dude happens to know every politician/rich kid and where they hang out ..

One Sunday he called me to follow him to Ceddi Plaza ,a popular mall at the central area ,he took his car

On getting there ,I saw what looked like a dream, young boys age 18-25 .all came to the mall with cars you only see on TV..from Lamborghini to Bugatti to benz .

And what they do with it is what got me shocked ..this guys were using this cars to do car stunt .. a sport where u use your car to perform different tricks ..

Come and see the way they were using Cars worth millions to do stupid stuffs ,once the cat got faulty ,they dump it and takr another one ..

One thing about Abuja kids is that they don't really show off when it comes to outfits , a typical politician/rich kid will wear ordinary white top and shorts but he will drive a Benz and hold an iPhone .

This rich kids love clubbing too,infact they enjoy it and they don't go to club in singles they go in convoy ..
You will find about 5-6 cars racing to the club ,wind up with loud music and shsisha smoke going on indoors .

They also pride themselves to going to Top hotels to swim and mingle ..a typical weekend in Transcorp Hilton will confirm this .

After a while I registered in a Summer school to prepare for jamb.that's where I made friends with a dude that changed my life .. Daniel was his name and he was a junior brother to the man that married ex president Good luck Jonathan daughter..

I joined the summer school late so I was a JJC to them ,which made me always sit alone and mind my business.

In this summer school Daniel was the biggest boy because he comes to school with different cars and he buys chicken suya worth 5 thousand naira everyday and share it in class


One day after class ,I was outside preparing to go home when I saw Mercy (hottest babe in summer school). She was talking to her friends and I just stood admiring her body ,when I heard Daniel telling his friend he likes her but don't know how to get her ..

One thing about Abuja kids is that most of them lack street OT ,and that I'd something u can only learn in Lagos ..

Without asking for his permission I called mercy and told her Daniel my friend wants to speak with her ,Daniel was shocked and happy ,they both exchanged numbers that day and after that he told me to follow him hone ..

I entered his 4matic Benz and we drove off to thier house in asokoro..thier estate is so sophisticated that if you are a first timer you won't be allowed in..once in we went to thier compound and for the first time in my life I entered a mansion..

Wow ....see money.. every where was shining..the mansion was about 8 bedrooms

A visitors lodge too which is not in the main house,this mini visitors house has two bedroom,

The compound is so big that there was there was a table tennis and long tennis court in the compound...and about 15 super cars ..he introduced me to his uncle who later liked me so much that he sponsored my university fees .

But when we became friends I realized that rich Abuja people are the most humble and nice people ever ..

Money makes you proud but too much money makes you humble ..
I also find out that the rich Abuja babes (politician/rich daughters) all have skin glow naturally.. unlike Lagos gitls that pride themselves with bleaching cream ..

If you meet a fair Abuja babe ,her fairness would be shining..fresh and not Caro white ..

On meeting my friend brother he looked into my soul ad if to find if I'm hiding a hint of skeleton there ..after checking Mr properly he then told me to have my sit and compliment that he can tell that I'm a good boy ..
I later realized that yhier house

AFvckingAlpha:
The fvck


Niggarr!!



If you bought the cell with your hard earned money, then you have every right to seize that phone.


My niggarr, fvck any bitch that gon pull that shit with me, bringing out a weapon, damn!

She probably be digging her grave, cos I aint gonna take that shit likely.

Niggarr that bitch wanted you dead, you gotta do the right thing, you gotta caught that bitch off.

I would have said another thing but you'd chicken out, you probably a bitch ass niggarr!

Emeka so this is the nonsense you do on Nairaland?? Parading yourself like a man.. yet you can't pass ordinary jamb... So this is the life you portray online .. your mom will hear this

ashewoboy:
18-23 is the standard for any adult man.

With that moniker you're not fit to be an adult man

peropoliet:
please who knows Paolo madini phone number this simp must be marked out of the field

Mark out your dad first

Nicepoker:
Diary of a SIMP.

Your father kept a diary too ..

nurain150:
Congratulations simp

Save your congratulations for your dad

Tajbol4splend:
They are fooling you with all those stories of SIMP, even those guys shouting SIMP up and down don't follow that BS, finding the right woman, loving her and she loving you too will make you forget that SIMP BS

Most alpha males are mumu behind doors ..

Daniiel:
mad oi being a SIMP pays in the long run.

Ofcourse ,if being a simp doesn't pay ..your dad won't have met your Mom who gave birth to you.

Love is a beautiful thing, I still remember the first time I fell in love, I was 28 years old. I have been dating but have not really experienced Love ..

It was a Tuesday and I saw that babe walking by with her friend. My eyes were locked onto her and my senses flown away.

I was admiring God's beauty in a human. Like a man under a spell I immediately left what I was doing and started pursuing this babe like a lion after a prey..

I don't know where the courage came from but I walked up to them and started vibing with both friends without letting them know who I was into.

She got near her house and told me to go back, so I collected the numbers of both of them. Deleted the friends own immediately and saved my crush. Her name was Bukola.

Then my mumu started .. First I bought mtn card 400 to load so I can call her .. at first she gave me tough time , I'll call in the morning she won't pick , call on the afternoon same thing. Then in the night she would pick and then tell me "sorry I did not see your calls "..

Infact when I knew I was in love was the day she flashed me by mistake, I was hungry as hell that day, and me and my friend was already drawing map on how we are going to spend the last 200naira with me.. i'mmediately I saw that call. Hunger flew away . And because I don't have credit to call her back I quickly used the last 200 to buy card so I can talk to her ...
Only for her to pick and tell me "Pls I'm very sorry you're not who I wanted to call "..
I was disappointed but still want to talk to her then she told me "I'm busy right now , maybe later "...

Omo I received insult from my friend tire that day.. infact that momth was hell .. my friend was so angry with me that he called me woman wrapper..

But still yet I love her the same .
One day I texted her that it's mu birthday and that even if she won't call she should at least text me happy birthday..

After about 2 hours she called me for the first time , wished me happy birthday and ask if I'm celebrating it . I told her m not celebrating but I would be happy if she would follow me to a fancy restaurant..

She agreed..

And it started from there. From tastee fried chicken I took her to ShopRite and we did small shopping..

After that day she started picking my calls and I never stopped showing her how much I love her .. I make sure I always send her Good morning and good night text .. I also make sure every time I buy airtime I buy her own too..

But with everything she told me she's not interested in a relationship..

One day I stopped.. no more calls no more text .. o forced myself to stop talking to her .
After about a week I woke up to a text from her that says "I miss seeing your text messages and missed calls "...

I was happy so I called her back and like a miracle she came to my house that day and we kissed .. the whole skyrocketed from there .. after a while she allowed me into her paradise and I realized she's tear rubber .. long story short we are married now with 2 beautiful kids ...

MODIFIED

Marriage with her was heavenly.. I remember I was working at GTBank when we got married, while she works with a private firm...there was no kids involved yet
.
We were so close that you would mistake us for siblings,,we do have our fight sometimes but anytime it happens. She knows my mumu button And I know hers too.

We eat and bath together... There was this time I traveled for a week.. Before I came back she fell sick cos she's not used to staying without me .
Life is so easy with her .My car is her car .most times I go to work with Uber while she drives ..
When I'm broke we eat what we have no pressure...
..

Pls dear youth Love still exists

[quote author=virginprincess post=97205288]Wasn't your age bracket (15-24), so what are you saying? must i be 15. [/quote


So you're 16?

[quote author=Wyry post=97206388]Nigerian girls are useless.[/quote


Hmm but your mom and sisters are Nigerians too.. that makes them ?

virginprincess:
For the part of the men i fully agree because all they think about is sex, sex, sex, nothing more, then for the women, i partially agree especially num 1 because i somehow fall into that category.

So you're 15 years old

Coming from a guy that changes his gender to f on Nairaland...

























































































stupid conclusions.[/quote]

From personal Experience and people's Experiences I have gathered that women agr determines what they want

(1) 15-24 years old : At this age they want a cute, fine or handsome man. They are more concerned about looks at this age

(2) 24- 30 years old : At this age they start to care more about how rich you are .. Looks mean nothing to them

(3) 30-40 years old : At this age they just want a man with strong gbola too satisfy them sexually,

(4) 40 years and above : They want love .



Men


(1) 15-24 years : A woman with big ass or boobs to have sex with

(2) 24-30 years : A woman to have sex with

(3) 30-40 years :. A woman to have sex with

(4) 40 years and above : A younger woman to have sex with



Do you agree?

Jacksparrow7:
Don't cry ehn I know he missed your name

Who is tf is she?

ongback:
Hell fire is an illusion, it does not exist. It is just an instrument of control. The masses needs to be controlled with all these nonsense religious beliefs.

If it happens that it does really exist, the only person on your list that will be found in the fictitious "hell fire" is righteousness89. Those who will take the front row seats on the fictitious burning lake are the Oyedepos, all the pastor Chris, Fatonyigbo, bushiri and every other Gods of men and their dumb followers, Imams and all Muslim leaders and followers, Mohammed (pbuh in hell fire) every believer and every ummah. May you all burn in your fictitious hell, amen.

May God open your eyes

tnerro1:
Serious yaba left werey

If u laughed while reading then you're on yabaleft too

Afostev11:
u just told him the gospel truth..... no matter how happy u are u don't just make fun with some things

U better give yourself a chill pill

[quote author=longetivity post=97107136]Our online pastor in Hell Fire, op Ogun go kill u for me[/quote

Better repent hell fire is real .. jokes apart . If u like be hoping u would see Nigeria hell

Nazgul:
Try writing you'll make a fortune from it. You've got the humor. Good story by the way, I had a good laugh.

Lol ..I'm just catching cruise

Cerebellum:
Lol...lol

Chai!

NL and Kolo OP

which kain eleribu OP be this one again

On a night am resting my nerves after eating sweet edikaikong

Eleribu OP

Eleribu commenter �

So I slept and saw myself in hell fire , on getting to the gates I saw a long queue of people all lining up at different gates ..
I was happy I won't be the only one going into the fire, I looked left and right and I saw queue everywhere .. I was confused because there were many gates all leading to same different hell fire ..

Then I noticed that everyone there have thier names on thier back , I started to look for who I know so I can ask questions, that's when I saw Righteousnes89 I was happy seeing a fellow Nairalander..but I was shocked ,I said bros haba but you are always preaching the gospel ,he then started crying saying he was righteous and was preaching the gospel but one day he got a message from slawomir..
I was like "Damn niggar "...he told me he would have ignored but that he wanted to win his heart to Christ so he replied his message ,but that slawomir corrupted his mind and he started smoking weed and banging pussy when suddenly he heard the trumpet...
I felt bad for him but then I asked him which other Nairalander are here apart from damn niggar ,.He then told me all the mods and supermod are here too including seun.i was ehn ehn..

Then I asked again bros pls why so many gates , he told me that every country has it's own hell fire .. I was shocked ,!!! I look at the gate and saw that Righteousnes89 and majority of people were queing on Nigeria hell fire gate..

I quickly advised him to leave the Nigerian gate and go to London or U.k gate instead but he laughed and said the reason why the queue is much on Nigerian gate is because the fire there is not burning well , because of the wood is not enough, and that is becauser the people in charge are corrupt and have embezzled the money mearnt to buy wood ..

As he was still explaining I saw Lai Muhammad and I was surprised, because he have a post like an officer in hell fire , we greeted him

We were still surprised seeing Lai Muhammad, when Wizkid came too, I was like star boy !!!!!! But he did not answer me because he was feeling down , I tried calling him again I said "hey star boy don't feel bad " .. he did not reply ..

Suddenly I heard a loud voice and the Nigerian gate opened

People were rushing to go in when suddenly, I saw davido , I screamed baddest, baddest !!!!.... Him and his o.b.o gang were together, I said baddest I'm your biggest fan but why are u here now , baddest then told me I should pls call him goodest from now on because that name is one of the reasons he is going to hell fire

doubleE70:
hey how far na

I dey

Uzomacharles:
You just created an account to share all your life issues......


You try sha

What else do you do on a faceless forum

Dear X
Who would think we would fall apart ,
Remember how we start ?.
Taking u to ShopRite bought u a big teddy bear and all of that ..

Fun fact . That was my school fees money ,
Had to lie to my parents to send another money

that's how much u mean to me..
Later that day i saw ur text saying you're coming to me
Then we got deep overtime ..
U coming always to spend the night.
Even Your mommy knows me But she didn't think in school we were having sex.
Remember the night u Got a call from mom .
That when u back from school u will do virginity test

and that scared you...
You told me to tell them I disvirgin you ..
When I'm not the one who disvirgined you .
But I had to lie for you,

that made your sister hated me. Cos she thinks I took advantage of you ..
Few months after we fought and my friend slapped your face
One of my biggest mistakes..
Still regret it today..
But last night I went on Facebook.
Searched for you and saw the way u face look.
You've grown beautiful but who's that guy holding you .?
Your new boo ?...
I hope he loves you better than I do .
Wish you the best whoooooooosh!!.
.

Torie8:
Continue

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