₦airaland Forum

NgeneUkwenu:
IPOB Yoots, Come And Defend The President Of Biafran Come 2019!

NgeneUkwenu:
IPOB Yoots, Come And Defend The President Of Biafran Come 2019!

Midekin:
Why stress urself when perfect budget events can handle both the court and church wedding with this package

betafuture:
I am very sorry, it seems like anytime I post on Nairaland is actually the time I have great challenges in my life, however, my posts also reflect the chronicle of my life. You may wish to check out my last posting about how I was sacked in the Bank with a debt that was guaranteed by a junior staff, whose job was threatened by the loan I obtained and she guaranteed for me. please find the link https://www.nairaland.com/2282140/loan-incured-before-termination-appointment Like I mentioned in that post, I got a job as with a Rep member and he appointed me as the Special assistant on a salary of 80k monthly and my boss paid my rent, of which I engage with my lender to take 50k with me monthly and right off the excess interest and stop disturbing the junior colleague, an arrangement they agreed to and everybody was fine, save that I had to struggle to cope with 30k monthly as a family man, working in Abuja. My wife never complained. I just gave her 25k from the salary, once received, to buy food for the family why I tried to manage with the remaining 5k. It was tough! Luckily, a junior lady cousin who works in a bank was posted to Abuja and we had to accommodate her. She was very kind and understood my plight. Sometimes, she drops up to 50k for my wife to augment the house expenses. She would tell me and sometimes, I would take additional 10k to ad to my pocket money.

The home was running, my son, my wife and my cousin, including myself were very happy. As a banker, I had learned the skill of marketing and networking and negotiation. In the course of my sojourn in the national assembly I met a head of a parastatal wjo needed me to do some strategic alliance between his organization and my boss. We later became great friends, and i realized I could access a scholarship to study in the UK through him. To cut the story short, I pursued this opportunity to the latter and I got a Federal government scholarship to pursue a Masters degree in the UK. I saw this as an opportunity to rewrite the story of my life. Two months in the UK, I began to look for means to bring my wife and son to join me in the UK. While I was in UK, I made it a point of duty to send 150k to my wife in Nigeria on monthly basis (Remember I was on scholarship) and I also do student work in the UK. Because we did not sell our car during the crisis, I also gave the custody of the car to her.

FIRST SUSPICION

When she was about coming to the UK with my 7 years old son, we decided to give out some of our home appliances and sell most of them including the car. Since I was not in Nigeria, she was to manage the transactions. Because I opened her e-mail address, i do see her mails, so i could see the alert on her GTB. The first thing that prompted me was that the amount she received for the sales of our car was 100k higher than what she declared to me. (The fund was meant to buy the flight tickets for her and my son). There were other expense transactions that were over declared, but the actual amount debited to her account were quite low. I did not confront her on these issues until she arrived UK with my son. When I did, I could see the way she manipulatively and professionally lied her way out of the whole issue. I did not pick an offense, hence i made her to understand that I was never convinced. Since then my instinct told me that if she could lie to me so much on finance, maybe there are other things going on in her life that I never known. However, I opened her Facebook account for her years ago in Nigeria, but I never bothered to check it. Out of curiosity, I tried login into her Facebook account and I discovered she has changed the password. My first reaction was to check it, but had I done that, she would have been conscious, then I used my skill as an trained IT security expert to crack her password and then access her Facebook. I ran through all her messenger message and everything was fine. Apart from a certain guy who always beg her for assistance and prayer, there was nothing really suspicious about her messanger and then, we continued with our normal life.

After a week in UK, she started to work as a carer (her visa permitted her to work fully), and she began to make money. I know how much enters her account and we decide how to spend. My son also start schooling and life began to have meaning again. I finished my masters with a distinction and the best graduating student in my department and my University offered me automatic admission for PhD, with part scholarship.l To remain, we needed to source funds to show evidence that my family can stay with me in the UK and show evidence of the balance of school fees. We sourced for money everywhere. She brought all she had and we had to borrow both from UK and Nigeria. My boss was very supportive and I commenced the PhD this September. As a family, we have a problem. My son is now 8 years and we have been trying to make another baby but it does not seem to be forthcoming. We have been to hospitals in the UK, we were both tested and once told my sperm motility was low, treated, but later we were considered both ok.

Since her arrival in the UK, I noticed that my wife suddenly repel sexxx. Sometimes, we had sexxxx just once in a month, she would find a way of brushing away by advances. At a level, i had to ask if there was any problem, but she said it was because of the new environment, her jobs and what have you. This further told me that all was not well in my marriage. She knows I love her and I would do anything for her. While we were yet trying to pay my tuition, her mum got a US visa and all the children were making contributions for her journey, I had to take from my school fees and send to Nigeria and manage my school to give us more time. I tried to ensure that we continually live like one happy family.

Do not let me sound like one perfect good guy. I had also lived a rough bad life in the past and she is aware. During my days in the bank, I had been sexually reckless and irresponsible. There was a time I left office to a gal house, fckked her and I never knew that the condom we used was stick to my shoe. I drove with it home, entered home very late at night, my wife was already angrily waiting for me in the house, only to see a used condom with sperm inside attached to the soul of my shoe. It was an issue that we had to battle with for weeks, even though I never confess it was from, I told a story that it must have got gummed to me at the mechanic village where I had gone to pick my car in the evening (She was aware that someone has accused my mechanic of having sexxx in his car, leaving condom at the back seat). after few weeks, we resolved the issue and we continued leaving normal life. However, there was also a time I suspected her activities on Facebook and I realised a guy whom she has known in the past has been pestering her and she seems to be encouraging him (That was during our period of financial crisis). I had confronted her, she had denied they never had anything but the guy was just pestering her. I apologised and went sober. I called the guy (who was also married) and lived in another faraway city. The guy denied having anything to do with her that she just knew her while growing up. The guy originally blasted me, but later called back and apologized and promised never to disturb her again. I was hurting for months, after which I forgave, forgot and moved on. Let me also state that during the period of my financial crisis, I made a covenant with God, after listening to a message, that whatever the case maybe, I will remain faithful to my wife. This I have manage to keep despite advances from both married and single friends and acquaintances.

THE REAL ISSUE

Now, we are living in the UK and very happy, she is working full-time, while I pursue my PhD full-time, work part-time and my son schools full-time and we were all happy, save the issue of delayed pregnancy and (to me, the poor sex life from her). Let me also state that I bought her a Samsung phone (when she arrived last year), which I have full access to because I know her password. Few months ago, she told me she wanted a bigger phone that she would send the one I bought her to my younger brother in Nigeria who had been disturbing her for a phone. Even though, I thought we did not need to spend money on a new phone at that crucial time because of the looming school expenses, I consented just for her to be happy and she got herself a Samsung galaxy s8 plus for 700pounds, which she would repay of 2 years. The first thing that prompted me about the phone was that she changed her password, but I never mind because I thought she was preventing my son, who always loved to play game on her phone from accessing the phone. However, after few weeks, I began to feel very uncomfortable about the whole stuff. My instinct just told me all was not well. Whatever was it, I could not place my finger on it. But after reviewing my work with my supervisor in the University yesterday, I just felt like going home to rest, instead of studying in the school and then, I met wife in the house with my son. She was trying to order some items online for my son for Christmas and on arrival, she gave her phone to select what we should buy for him, and then, the FB message came into her phone and I could read...'it is not what you think, I have been very busy'

I selected the item I thought was ok, gave returned her phone, picked my laptop and logged in to her Facebook. My wife pretended she was enganging me in discussion, but was responding to the message from a guy, who obviously was her lover and she wrote (I was reading from my computer without her knowledge) 'You know I will ALWAYS LOVE YOU'. and the other guy responded 'I love you more baby' (By this time, I was already burning on the seat, but I somehow managed to keep my calm). She wrote 'But you don't call me' ...and she stood up and went to the kitchen (I wanted to gather enough evidence before I reacted), but immediately she got to the kitchen, she deleted the conversation. At this time, I could not take it. My son was in the sitting room, watching cartoon. I went to her in the kitchen and aggressively confronted her. She originally pretended she did not know what I was saying, but when she say the aggression and seriousness in me she started begging and crying. I lost control of my emotion. I was angry and shouting. My son was there. He was too young, but very intelligent. he understood everything and began to blame his mum, at the same time asking me ti give mum a second chance. I was bitterly hurting. I felt like tearing her into pieces, but if I tried that in UK, it will be straight to jail. She could not state the reason behind her action. She was still trying to lie. She said the guy was her ex and they recently became friends on Facebook and the guy is trying to rekindle the old relationship. The guy is based in Nigeria, they do not even see. Everything she said was incoherently sense. All she wanted was that I should forgive her. I should not tell anybody. She cried, wept and what have you. I was hurting. If it were to by Nigeria, she would have left my house yesetrday, but in UK, it is difficult. The love turned to hatred. She managed to convince me to enter room with her, so that she will discuss the issue with me, without getting our son involved. In the room, it was the same crying and plea for forgiveness and a promise it would never happen again. I told her i was ok, but she would not let me out. I had to angrily shove her away from the door and she hit her head against the wardrobe. i was too angry, too sad, and too hateful to care. i called her all manners of unprintable names. I cursed her, I was just too angry. She kept begging. I left for the sitting room and she came back, knelt down before me and kept begging. My son was crying that two of us were making him sad. The young boy even threatened to tell his teacher in the school on monday. I was too angry to listen. I just told her to let me be. She stood up with tears in her eyes to enter the toilet, I checked her Facebook account again and realised that the lover had sent another message thus: "My dear I don't call you always to protect your home, but I always check your pictures every night before I go to bed" As I was reading, she stupidly deleted that again in the toilet. (Please note that my wife always post our family pictures on facebook, stating how I am the best husband in the world).

My anger erupted again and I rushed to meet her in the bathroom and asked her why she deleted the last message of the guy and she tearfully answered that she did not want me to see anything that could aggravate my anger the more. I angrily snatched the phone from her and smashed it on the floor. She knelt down at my feet and continued to cry and beg for forgiveness, but I was hurting so badly. I left for sitting room again and my son was confusedly crying. She came back and knelt before me and continued begging and weeping and begged we should go back to the room to discuss, at least to protect our son. After a while, i followed her. There was nothing to say; the same weeping, crying and promises to not do it again and swearing that they never had anything together. I told her I needed to talk to the guy and she pleaded I should not. I told her she is giving me an impression that she is protecting the guy so that she could continue her illicit affairs with him and told her it would not work. The can change tactics, but its is only a matter of time. I told her, I would forgive her, but I cannot trust her again and when there is no trust in marriage, the marriage is gone. I also told her I must engage that guy that she should give me his number, but she said her phone is no longer working. I made her feel comfortable that I have forgiven her, but honestly I am hurting. I went back to my laptop, continued chat with the guy on her messenger, but he was now online. We both slept on the same bed, i realised she could not sleep. In the middle of the night she woke me up to beg again, she was offering a make-up sexxx, but I was not interested. I told her i had forgiven her, but I am still hurting and there is no way i could have erection with her. In the morning, I checked her messanger, i discovered the iddiot has responded, still claiming to love her. I checked his profile, I realised he is a muslim, who has a wife with two kids. His location was not shown, but most of his pics her in Nigeria apart from two which have foreign background. I also realize he has limited posts on FB, but the phone number on his FB page is US phone number.

From my wife's FB account, I sent a message thus:

Hi, Mr Farouq, my name is Adams, I am Grace husband
I just wish to inform you that all the rubbish you have been doing with my wife are now exposed to me
I advise you in the name of whatever thing you believe, STAY AWAY FROM MY WIFE.

I also realize you are a married man. If you have any moral integrity and respect for family values, you will know that
responsible men do not run after married women or break homes.

I do not care whatever you claim you think of her, just heed this warning STAY AWAY FROM MY WIFE.

He read it an never respond. I went to her facebook setting and unfriended him.

I left home in the morning to go study in the library, but honestly, I could not assimilate anything. I am so emotionally broken down, so psychologically disturbed. The whole event kept playing in my head. I found it difficult to rationalise it. I continued to find fault in my being and my personality. I know I am very attractive handsome young man. Despite showing I am married, ladies still flock around me. I am also a passionate lovemaker. I dress well and look neat. I don't seem to understand where I have failed. Sometimes I just close my eyes and i feel tears dripping, but I have got to be strong. As for her, she has remained in the room since morning, hiding her head in shame and crying profusely. I have cut off communication with her since I came back from school and I have enganged myself in drinking spirit maybe my spirit will be strenghtened.

This is my story, this is my ordeal. Please I need advice.

Thanks.

rev2214:
Whatever ba3, you will find it in the warehouse at one point or another when items are offloaded. You can visit the place too

rev2214:
Hi,

We can Help You Buy USED ITEMS DIRECTLY from Importer inside Warehouse.

Collection of items range from Children, Men, Ladies Cloths, Shoes, Woman Hair, Diaper to kitchen ware, Electronic, Vehicles, Computers etc. Individual looking for used items can post it here with correct specification and I will get it for them.


ITEMS ARE AS FOLLOWS
Phones
Batteries
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Table Set
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Computers
LED/LCD TV
Accessories
Car locks
Motor parts
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Vehicles
Children cloths
Wrist watches
Underwear
Make up
Short wear
Face cap
Jewelry
Body cream
Sun glasses
Toiletries
Diaper
Sandals
Shoes
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Hat
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Wine
Washing machine
Kitchen Ware
Electric Kettle
Water heater
Microwave
Gas can
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Mirror
Hot plate
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If you want any other item not listed, kindly post it here. Possibly, we will get it for you and add it to our list.

Please note that I specify on used items, even though there are also new items coming directly with container from oversea to the warehouse.

Charges is per purchase which is subject to negotiation.

Delivery 2days within lagos. While outside Lagos will be determine by distance.

Waiting for Order and if you have any question please don't hesitate to ask.


Kindly go to last page for recent OFFLOAD. You can also join the whatsApp group for regular update

mjay:
For sale. 200ah 12v Battery plus 800watt Genius Original Inverter all @60k. Take advantage. CALL OR TEXT 08087885000

1260days:
Send me a whatsapp message let's talk. Thanks.

1260days:
Super clean Dell Inspiron 15 Laptop pc for quick sale.

Configuration
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Price: 120k naira
Buy with warranty.
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Ezigbonmadu:
Many of the CEO's explanations don't add up. And that is shocking because he is expected to know how his company operates more than anybody else.

He said his company provide 4G internet on their platform. This is ridiculous beyond explanation. You can only have 4G/LTE internet services from wireless broadbands and not from satellites. Other wireless protocols are WiMAX, WiFi, GPRS, 3.5/3.0G. While satellite bands are ku and c bands (and their derivatives). I'm a Communication Engineer. TSTv claiming to provide 4G on a satellite platform is impossible and ridiculous. Except there will be SIM cards on their devices. This is exactly what I suspect because he mentioned 2 things:

1. That their decoder is Android.
2. That the device doubles as a router.

Essentially what they will offer is a smart phone in a big box. They will depend on your local GSM coverage and data for their data uplinks while downlinks are handled by their satellite feed.

My conclusion:
1. Their data speed will be terrible. Hence people buying the device just for data will be frustrated.
2. They are just a third party service provider. They don't have their own satellite feeds. They will also resell internet from main one (according to Dr Bright, their CEO). Thus, as resellers, they can't control or guarantee quality.

My verdict:
Just hold on. Let your neighbours buy and use it for at least two months before you put your money on it. Hopefully all questions will be answered by then.

(Okay. They say it's just 5k and It's not worth this technical advise)

Odilafta1:
That mannequin boo..bs has fallen

Evaberry:
Ladies take this advise seriously

1. DONT ever ask a guy out

2. Don't ever tell a guy you love/like him.

Asking a guy out never ends well

Stingman:
• 1963 Constitution, The Ideal Grundnorm – Middle Belt Ethnic Nationalities
• Going Back To 1963 Constitution Not Tenable-Arewa Youths
• Yakasai Supports Return To 1963 Constitution

Northern elders and youths have cautioned the Yoruba, their South East and South South neighbours over their clamour for the country’s restructuring, as well as return to the 1963 constitution.

The two groups, which vehemently opposed the recent resolution of the Yoruba at a summit tagged, “Restructuring: The Yoruba Agenda 2017,” alleged that sustained agitation for restructuring would, in the final analysis, not augur well for the growth and development of the nation.

Secretary General, Arewa Consultative Forum (ACF) Anthony Sani, told The Guardian, yesterday, that calls for restructuring by the coalition of Yoruba groups, and those from South East and South South, as well as the return to 1960 and 1963 constitution were “puzzling.”

Arewa youths’ position was made known by President of the Arewa Youths for Progress and Development (AYPD), Comrade Danjuma Sarki, who said though “the constitution we are currently operating was hurriedly put together by the military in order for them to hand over power to civilians,” there were better ways to improve on it.

Sani said the calls were “puzzling in the sense that these are people, who profess to be jaunty face of democratic values, and who are expected to know how democracy works. I would not be tired of saying that while there are national consensus on problems of a nation, there are no similar national consensus on solutions to these problems. Hence the significance of multi-party democracy, which allows each political party to present a distinct method of solution as contained in the party’s manifesto, which it used
to canvass for electoral mandate.”

Sani argued that, “for the Yoruba to now call for restructuring of the country on the basis of the 1963 constitution, gives an impression that they do not know how to make their desires possible in a multi-party democracy.”

He maintained that, however good and laudable restructuring of the country may be, it has to be decided by Nigerians through a democratic process; no few people can make that decision on behalf of Nigerians.

“I am not sure if their restructuring is the panacea for the national malaise we are in. I say this because Nigeria practiced the confederate arrangement as symbolised by regionalism and parliamentary systems of government during the First Republic. These were abolished and supplanted by a unitary system by General Aguyi Ironsi, who felt the centre under confederation was too weak to keep the nation under one roof.”

The ACF scribe added that, “the North and the West, under Chief Awolowo decided to create a federation of 12 states, which was a compromise between confederation and the unitary system,” noting that “since then, the states multiplied to 19, 30 and now 36, while we practice presidential system of government.”

Sani, who said some of those clamouring for the rejection of the 1999 constitution that is a clone of that of 1979 participated in its making, queried how the Federal Government under 1999 constitution, prevents state governments from living to their potential?

He said: “Lagos is developing today under the 1999 constitution, and nobody has stopped them from deploying what they collect from the federation account and internally generated revenue for development at their own pace. Is the Coalition of Yoruba groups claiming state governments misapply their own allocations because the sources are not from the states? This does not make sense. And can we honestly say the 52 per cent for the centre is truly too much in a country with many centres of centrifugal forces capable of putting it asunder? As far as I am concerned, there is nothing like true federalism that is universally accepted. That is why there are no two federal systems that are the same. Each federal system depends on the circumstance of its emergence…”

On how the nation can best be restructured under the present reality, the ACF Secretary General remarked: “as it is right now, the term restructuring means different things to different people. As a result, it is hard to take a position in a situation like that. And in order for Nigerians to make their informed judgment on restructuring, let political parties that wish to restructure the country include it in its manifestoes and canvass for electoral mandate needed for their implementation. I am sure when political parties campaign for their preferred model of restructuring the country, they would help to enlighten the public more about restructuring and make informed decisions during elections. That is how democracy works. It is not for the few people to meet and try to bulldoze the government into taking decisions in favour of far-reaching reforms of the polity. That course of action would not only be undemocratic, but also morally preposterous. This is more so because the current regime did not include specific type of restructuring in its manifesto.”

Sarki, the AYPD helmsman said: “To be realistic, going back to the 1963 constitution is not tenable,” adding that the country should rather review the 1963 to 1999 constitutions. If we look at issues that will promote the unity of Nigeria and propel growth in the country, that will bring everybody together and also promote the principle of inclusion.

“But, if you say that we should go back to 1963, that will be something that will be difficult to sustain. Just like the National Assembly is on the verge of amending the constitution, we can look at areas we think should be amended and make the necessary recommendations.

“The National Assembly should also take into consideration, positions that those, who elected them want. They should ensure that the interests of all regions are covered. Something that would bring about fairness, justice, equity and acceptability of the union called Nigeria. This is because most of the agitations for restructuring are borne out of the feelings of unfairness by people. We want to advise that those who are agitating for a return to the 1963 constitution should soft pedal so that we can move forward,” Sarki said.

For the Association of Middle Belt Ethnic Nationalities (ASMBEN), that the 1963 Republican Constitution was the ideal grundnorm for the country is not a novel development, what is novel, the group said is the urgency to return to it.

According to its interim chairman, Sule Kwasau, “Nigeria is hanging on a precipice and has never been divided on ethnic and religious lines as it is now. The 1999 constitution is fraught with so many anomalies, lies. The 1999 constitution is a military constitution and in making it, the powers that be were substantially from a section of the country and so the opinions of other sections of the country were never captured, as they had no representatives in the military leadership then.

“Why are some Nigerians nostalgic about the 1963 Republican Constitution as against the 1999 military constitution? It is simply because the 1999 constitution is a military constitution, but claims to be a federal constitution,” the interim leader said.

He continued: “The provisions contained therein cannot bring about even development. Again, the presidential system is very expensive, unlike the 1963 constitution, which recognises regions as federating units, with powers to do most of what is contained in the exclusive legislative list under the 1999 constitution.

The 1963 constitution also guarantees true federalism by providing for principles of derivation, which is 50 per cent for oil producing regions. It also encourages healthy competition among the diverse regions.”

Kwasau said his group, however, prefers the implementation of 2014 National Conference Report, “but if that is not possible, then a brand new constitution should be brought into existence.

“This is important because the constitutionally unrecognised six political zones of the federating units will short-change the Middle Belters because we were arbitrarily lumped with people we do not share the same culture with, eg, Southern Kaduna, Southern Kebbi, Southern Borno etc., who naturally belong to the Middle Belt. The other solution will be to create additional regions in the North to address our fears,” he said.

Meanwhile, contrary to the position of ACF, elder statesman, Tanko Yakasai, has thrown his weight behind the call for a return of the 1963 constitution.
In an exclusive interview with The Guardian, Yakasai, however, faulted the Ibadan meeting of the Yoruba, who called for the return of the same constitution on the premise that, the meeting failed to even understand that the 1963 constitution had only four regions not six as enunciated by the document that emanated from the meeting.

“I am speaking not on behalf of anybody, but on behalf of my humble self. As I am speaking with you now, I am 100 per cent in support of the return to the 1963 constitution. We had East, Mid-West, West and Northern regions only under that constitution. Not six regions as included in the document that was passed at Ibadan meeting,” challenged Yakasai.”

He added that none of those, who attended the meeting had any mandate from his people to go and take a position on those issues that were discussed at the meeting.

“Yes, as Nigerians we are all entitled to our opinions and expressions. But you cannot represent people without their legitimate mandate. Who then mandated those people to take such decisions? Mind you, you can only have people’s mandate through popular vote, by the electorate. So, who mandated those people to take such decisions? He asked rhetorically.

“Do you know that Yoruba traditional rulers and religious leaders were not part of the organisers of that meeting? So, in that scenario how can you now come and say this position is that of the Yoruba race? It doesn’t work like this,” he said.

The presence of thugs at the meeting, Yakasai said was an indicator that the document that was produced from the meeting was “completely faulty and pre-arranged.”

On the communiqué, the elder statesman said: “You cannot raise a communique from that meeting the way it was raised. Hundreds of people cannot, in any way, reach a resolution. Mind you, a resolution is a summation of the discussions that took place during a meeting.

“When a resolution is reached, it is then that you give the resolution to a communiqué committee to come up with a communiqué. But in case of the Ibadan meeting, there was nothing like that. And because of the presence of hired thugs, nobody could raise an eyebrow there,” Yakasai alleged.


http://guardian.ng/news/north-cautions-yoruba-southerners-on-clamour-for-1963-constitution/