₦airaland Forum

Bigmikedagod:
I dreamt last night say Man u beat Liverpool 4-0. my dreams dont lie...

and it will come to past

One thing I love about united is they have a way of surprising critics

De gea or no de gea I just want to tell you guys that if Liverpool win man united i will not watch football again

Its either united win or draw

Liverpool are coming to the theatre of dreams they can't pick up all 3point there

It either their first draw or first lose of the season.

You guys should save this comment as a reminder

Adekunle lamar

This list is absolutely rubbish

Rodrygo that is not even in madrid second eleven team .and who is Alphonse Davis,

Fati just stated featuring for Barcelona is selected ahead of Samuel chuckwueze who have been playing for Villarreal since last season .
Rubbish

See finishing your self-esteem is so low that a snail can jump over it

Psalm2423:
Must you come n fool yourself on Nairaland? You already know the answer to your question, so do it bro. She’s dragging you #100. If my sister draws me #10k, I’ll slap her. What kind of greed is that? Are you not an idiot for even giving her money when she was stuck with your car. So she would’ve left the car if you didn’t send the 1k for fuel.

Even a 12 year old knows what you need to do bro. This thing called love is fake. The moment you guys start realizing it, the better for you.

baba nor talk that thing again dis one no be love cause am the guy na mumu on he own

OMG look at this boy the way he look the way dress I don lost eh oo eha oo ehen ehen

This shit is staged who was videoing it

It all happened last week Sunday cool evening I went to a brothel near my house to remove some akamu from my system .

So I enter inside the brothel meet one small girl dancing I signal her to come we agreed prize I took her home .

I slide my p into her v it was like I slide my p into an empty bucket my p was not hitting anything inside her.
I was like this is not what I bargain for.

I look at her face again she was too
innocent.
she too small for her v to just wild like that.
I ask her age she said she is 18
Omo na that moment I know say dem no dey see small pikin for ashawo again ooo

[s][/s]ey won the cup without it and he scored at the final and also missed a penalty to win a cup that even with 3 goaps down you are still beaten to the final by an english team, its not about the loss or goal its about how it affected the team hope they don cancel messi's ban or is he still looking for the evidence of rigging at the copa america[center][/center][left][/left]

No doubt Ronaldo is an excellent 7 but messi is a perfect 10

otiwisdom:
Fun fact
NASA just discovered the ball Messi sent to space against chile

really . so they forgot to discover the ball ronaldo sent to space against Barcelona in 2008 champions league semi final right?

OyiboOyibo:
Vector,Mode Nine and Illbliss are the only rappers there, others na wrappers

really

Jesse jags ahead of big daddy ice ? smh what a joke

logon599:
C trouble
C wahala.
In Onitsha then we call him "Ototo Cristiano"

Scoring 700 goals in modern day football with all the tight rules and strict formations is by no means a small feat. Certified legend alongside Messi.

And before you say many of his 700 goals were penalties, think about this: would Chelsea have lost the 2008 Champions league as well as the 2019 UEFA super cup if penalties were easy to score?
I'm sure Chelsea would have wished to have a Ronaldo on their team in both of those games.

Also before you mention tap ins, the great Van Nistelroy, a one time record champs league goalscorer, scored almost 98% of his career goals from inside the box. So scoring from tap ins on a regular basis is not a matter of luck, but excellent positional awareness and instinct which is the quality of a great marksman. If it was easy, there are strikers who score only 2 goals a season. I'm sure they won't mind scoring tap ins too to increase their tally.

the fact that he is about to score his 700 goals does not mean he is a better player than magicstirio Leo messi

Its because there are so many wack countries in Europe.

countries like faro island, San Marino, Luxembourg, Belarus, Malta, Lithuania, Kosovo, and Gibraltar.

Compere to South America where there is only like 15 countries.

If messi is playing in Europe he would have be celebrating 1000 goals by now.

I doubt if Ronaldo out of that 699goals scored just only 10 goals against south America teams

There is only one king of football and his name is

Different people possess different notions and understanding of “investment”. To start with, first of all, let’s try to get a clear understanding of what is investment and how it can be useful for the folks.
Investment is an act of buying assets or items that help you generate income in the long run. Economically, it can be defined as the act of purchasing assets or goods that won’t be consumed today but will be used to create wealth in future. While in financial aspects, one can define investment as an act of buying monetary assets in order to receive income from it in future or selling it later at a higher price for profit.
To elaborate the concept of ‘what is investment’ from financial point of view, it means that the investor invests or commits his money or cash in either security, financial assets or in bond issued by the government or the financial institutions with a hope to accumulate more cash in their account.
Investing money in a bond or equity not only brings a lump sum amount to the pocket of the investors but it also assists the government to expand its on-going projects. This is one of the primary reasons the government encourage and people choose this investment option.
There are different types of investment plans that a consumer can go for. However, before getting into details of different products of investment, it is essential to understand that there are basically two types of investment products: i) non-finanacial and ii) financial assets.
Non-financial assets are the most preferred among most of the people. Real estate and gold investments are few examples of non-financial assets. On the other hand, financial assets are further divided into a) fixed income products and b) market-linked products. here, bank fixed deposit and Public Provident Fund are fixed income products; whereas, mutual funds and stocks are market-linked products.
Here are the best investment avenues Indian people can look into in order to meet their financial goals:

Direct Equity
Direct equity is a volatile asset class and is a risk willing product. Not only it is tough to find the right stock in direct equity to invest but it’s also difficult to fix the timing of exit and entry. The risk of losing a substantial portion of amount is higher unless the consumer choose for stop-loss method to diminish losses. In the present time, 5,3,1 year of market returns is around 12.5, 8 and 13 percent, respectively. The consumer needs to have a demat account to invest in direct equities.

Equity Mutual Funds
According to the regulations of Securities and exchange board of India (SEBI), the scheme of equity mutual fund should invest at least 65 % of its assets in equity related instruments and equity. The fund of the equity should passively or actively be managed.

How a fund manager handles the actively traded funds, majorly defines the returns of these funds. The scheme of equity is graded as per the capitalisation of the market or the market in which they invest their money. In the present scenario, 5, 3 and 1 year of market return is around 20 %, 15% and 15%, respectively.

Debt Mutual Funds

The debt funds are one of the best modes for the investor to invest their hard earned money. They are less risky compared to the equity. This debt mutual funds in general invest in the securities which generate fixed interest such as government securities, corporate bonds, treasury bills, commercial paper and many more. In the present scenario, 5,3,1 year of market return stand around 7.5%, 8% and 6.5%, respectively.

RBI Taxable Bonds

The government has come up with 7.75% savings taxable bonds. This bond replaced the previous 8% savings taxable bonds 2003. As per the rule of RBI, the tenure of these bonds is 7 years. In general, the bond is issued by RBI in the format of demat and accredited to the BLA (Bond Ledger Account) of the consumer or the investor. Furthermore, a Certificate of Holding is provided to the consumer/investor as proof of the investment.

Senior Citizen Savings Scheme (SCSS)
Those who are looking forward to create a substantial financial corpus for their retirement, often choose to take up this option. As the name indicates, only senior citizen can open and invest in this scheme. Those who are above 60 can avail the benefit of this scheme.
They can either avail this saving scheme from post office or public banks. The tenure of this scheme is 5 years. Once it matures it can further be extended to 3 more years. In the present scenario, the interest rate of this scheme is 8.3% per year. This is fully taxable and quarterly payable. One person can open only one account and the maximum investment limit is 1.5 lakhs.

Public Provident fund (PPF)
PPF is still one of the most popular investment options across the country. there is a huge lot of people who still prefer to invest the money in this fund. The tenure of the scheme is 15 years. This is a tax saving investments avenue and the interest rate offered is also reasonable.

Bank Fixed Deposit

In India, fixed deposit is still considered as the safest investment choice among people. According to the rules of the Credit Guarantee Corporation and Deposit Insurance, each depositor has insured up to Rs 1 lakh for both principal and interest. One can easily choose for either yearly, half yearly, quarterly or monthly interest option.

Final Thoughts
Going through the aforementioned facts, it would be easier for you to relate to what is investment and how it brings hopes of gaining higher amount to the investors. These investment options are inferred as the best investment options among the common folks of the country. However, it’s always advisable to consult with financial advisors before going ahead with any investment plan as proper guidance and advice can lead one investor to right path of investment.

How helpful was this?

You are watching football and your team is losing one mumu will just come out from no where asking you (MY GUY WHO DEY WIN?)

As if you no get your own eyes to see who dey win mtcheeeeeeew

Some guys get mind ooo

You go just open eyes cutti cutti person body hmmmm na wa ooo

Me wet dey fear to kill common rat

Just because I say “feel at home” you now warm soup , make eba and chop two meat . Are you okay

2. In private school you pay, in private hospital you pay, but you want to eat private part for free . May private thunder locate you…
.
3 . I still don’t understand what Talent means … Because the uglier you are, the more sweet your voice is.. Don’t argue with me …. Just go to church and see..
.
4 . Nigeria is not save, i was kidnapped and killed but I managed to escape
…
5. Who else noticed that No bank sent Happy Independence Day to their customers?
Nigeria
6. This is my country where a slay queen will celebrate birthday three or four times in a year

7 . This is my country where guys greet fellow guys with insults and girls greet by hugging each other

8. This is my country where education is the key but after graduation the girls become make up artists or bakers and guys go carry Keke or do Yahoo

9 .This is my country where our politicians remember the poor masses once in 4 years

10 .This is my country where once a guy carries laptop and police see you, you be Yahoo boy

11 .This is my country where if want to get followers on social media you must do a give away

12. This is my country where a jobless girl will be complaining that most guys are broke abeg make you no insult me

13 .This is my country where we have professional beggars on the streets and online…
May God help us for this country …

14 .So one day I will stand at the alter and then a lot of people will be watching
me putting a ring on someone’s finger ? Me that don’t have sense , I will laugh and run away
.
15 .Just because I gave goat a lift and you’re calling me a thief …won’t humans help animals again.
.
16 .Research has shown that: every delicious AKARA is sold near a gutter
..the bigger the Gutter…the nicer the AKARA..
.
17 .So since all these years , nobody, not even my close friends actually told me that the past tense of bread is Sliced bread
You people are wicked jare..
.
18 .If your wife can’t cook no problem cook for yourself you are in a marriage not in a restaurant

19 .If your husband doesn’t give you money no problem you are in a marriage not a bank…work and earn yours…
(50-50).
.
20 .Last night i had a serious fight with my wife just because i was drunk
, and she made me promised her never to get my self drunk again which I did. Today I went to my friends birthday party my colleague at my working place, we all ate , drink and had fun . And now am so drunk , I manage to know my way back home . When I entered my house I was sitting on my sofa in my sitting room when my wife was coming down from the step, and I don’t won’t her
to know that am drunk so that we won’t have another fight , I started operating my laptop , when she came closer to me she said “honey who are you trying to fool? I can see that you are really drunk !” I quickly replied “look here woman I don’t want your trouble this time around, because i won’t tolerate
any nonsense from you. Well as u can see , I’m only trying to do some office work on my system .” She said to me “I see, but why are you typing on your briefcase ??..
.
21 .My neighbor called me to come and help her kill a rat in her house . I kept my condom in my pocket because no one knows the type of rat ..
.
22 .Buhari is flying , Osinbajo is coordinating, saraki is wondering , Dino is joking , kanu is threatening , Bello is enjoying , Buildings are collapsing , prices are Rising , people‍ are suffering , APC is disappointing , PDP is complaining , Teacher are crying , politicians are lying , Girls are slaying , Boys are Betting , JAMB is misbehaving️ , Graduates are browsing️
, Policemen are collecting
, EFCC are seizing , DSS ‍ is arresting️ , ASUU️ is striking ️ , Eagles are playing and # Opeyemi is rhyming and you are reading very soon you’ll start commenting️ , ISN’T NIGERIA INTERESTING??
.
23 .A man with AK 47 ran into a church
and pointed the gun at the congregation saying️, “Who is a child of GOD here?! Let me send him to heaven? The congregation remained silent .
He then released one shot into the roof, the congregation shouted , “It’s the Pastor ! He always says that he is a child of GOD!”
Pastor replied, “What kind of conspiracy is this? Every one here knows that I am the son of Ekua Safoa Donkor . How am I related to GOD?
.
24 .My girlfriend ended our relationship
today
just because of used condom a rat brought into my room..
.
25 .FACT ….. Poverty is manufactured in bed. You can’t be sleeping like you’re competing with the dead and expect to be rich in the land of living …

Get up and work
God help those who help them self….

Psalm2423:
Not true, there’s nothing like love. It’s just a platform for deceit, that’s why one person tends to let go easier than the other after a breakup.

really hmmmm maybe in Nigeria

Omar09:
Love isn't everlasting.

Love is a platform for deceit. And the loser is one who creates it.

not true .the truth is true is hard to find this days but love is everlasting if you find it

Madam your name gat nothing to do with your attitude or success in life.

It depends on how you was brought up, family background or ur community.

I know many Victoria who are pros , jobless house wife , not even brave as a human being. But they answer the name Victoria.

Now I want to ask you a question do you have any idea what the name Cynthia mean?

My eldest sister her name is Cynthia but she don't behaves like Cynthia .

She is kind , friendly, her smiles can easily make a sadist lol she is a banker married blessed with wonderful children.

Even my name I find it funny at times . my name is Nosamudiana meaning (gods protection )


The nigga just want to woo a lady he like maybe you gat what he want.

But you really beautiful if thats your real pic

You must be a very handsome guy like me

These are the things that happen when they (girls) know you're a handsome dude

My advice for you is you should bleep them

I know them (girls) very well they will hate you if you start avoiding them.

As for the girl that you refused to bleep believe me she hate you already she will never come to ur room again

It must be love it might be love it may be love

Love they say is everlasting

Blackivy27:

English; one of them is cool but you won't even know

Pidgin; wande cool but you no phyno

English David am at lake a

Pidgin David adeleke


English; look at Rinaldo


Pidgin c.ronaldo

English :- If I tell you that I don’t care anymore, how would you Know?
Pidgin :- If ITEL you say I NOKIA anymore, how you go TECNO?


English :- Antonio now took time
Pidgin :- Antonio Conte

English :- Look at Ronald!!
Pidgin :- C.Ronaldo o

English :- It is Ramsey that knows it
Pidgin :- Nah Ramsey Noah

English :- One of them is cool and you wouldn’t even Know
Pidgin :- Wande Coal and you no Phyno

English :- it’s not me, it was Ruth
Pidgin :- No be me, Naruto

English :- Sir it was David that baked it
Pidgin :- Sir na David Beckham

English:- Ousmane got them pregnant
Pidgin:- OUSMANE give DEMBELE

English:- I thought it was a girl but it’s a boy
Pidgin:- I think say na girl Burna boy

English:- David I’m at Lake A
Pidgin:- David Adeleke

English:- The bell belongs to Korede
Pidgin:- Na Korede Bello

You can add yours

Our naija girls no go talk .. na easy thing
Sha
Boy : oh girl you do me like am in a fix.. girl you take me higher than a spring ford. Girl you stool my heart like a thief no body can love you like the way I do .. girl your body make me feel alright and you are all I really want. Or

Boy: by looking at your beautiful face make me understand questions my heart is asking . I open my eyes you made me realize I really want you in my life.
Or

Boy .:baby girl will I laugh will I cry will I live or will I die it all depead on you


Girl : wow omg you're the kind of guy am looking for . am your girlfriend already.

Some people get time oooo ahh

Blackivy27:
plus another guy is urinating in front of me. He's showing me his d!ck on purpose. Shisssh! Its small though. First time im seeing a grown mans penis. I feel guilty

hmmmm