ifyalways:

This should be at the Jokes section cause without an atom of doubt,this is just a figment of ones imagination.

No one wud present anyone with such a list.

Contents of engagement list vary from individual to individual

ferdiii:

He was in haste and not in a haste. WAEC certificate does expire if you want to delay or JAMB does the delay in enrolling in a University. I know FUT MX won't allow you come in with a 4-yr-old cert. Go and ask.

Yes, he was in haste not in a haste, thanks for pointing that out

ok I understand you were in a haste.  You said you need more answers. I guess you didn't understand my explanation that WAEC or NECO certificate does not expire unless the holder dies. Is there anything in particular you want to know? JAMB expires because it is an entrance examination. WAEC is not an entrance examination, it is a certificate/qualification that you can use to get higher qualification, get a job, vie for political office, etc.

Do you really intend to go to the university? Please can you read your query and see if you can make some corrections. I believe you can do better than this.

In any case, I will answer your questions. WAEC and NECO certificates do not expire; they last for a life time. To hold the office of the president, VP, governor, etc, one must have at least a WAEC/NECO certificate, regardless of the date on it.

The other certificates that do not expire include;
- First School leaving Certificate (Primary School)
- Junior Secondary School Certificate (Junior Secondary School)
- HND, OND, NCE, Bachelors, Masters, PhD, etc (Tertiary qualifications)

ok

ok

true talk

rubi:

A na epu uzo zota ala tupu azowa ute

You secure the msot important things in life before the less important ones

But remember that : agbara aka na-azo ala, ndi ji ji ana-ako ji ha

When you are securing the 'most important things' remember that 'the less important ones' also count

lol

Questions
1. For the Germans, how many tribes are in Germany?
2. For the African-Americans, how many tribes are in USA?
3. For the British, how many tribes are in the United Kingdom?

hold on

lol

ZIM DRILL:

comapring south africa and nigeria

1. Nigeria is not the most densely populated country on earth
2. South Africa is more densely populated than most country on earth, have you asked yourself why?
3. The sparse population of south africa (as you claim) is because white folks invaded the country and used the black folks for police dog training. So almost all the black guys have rabies, and can't procreate
4. Nigeria being giant of Africa is not measured by just the size of the economy. You bring other factors into consideration: sports, market size, population, religion, culture (you can include corruption if you wish, because it also defines africa) etc. More so, when you mention African, the first thing that comes to mind is 'black man'. A white country can't be the giant of Africa

strangerf:

1.  Has the white people left Nigeria? Yes, They are back in the country, for the most part. [b]The ones here are just here to make money.[/b]
[/b]

1. The point I'm trying to make is that GEJ and Shell are in the same boat. So it's not a matter of you prefer Shell to GEJ, they are one and the same. There can't be GEJ in power without Shell. Same applies to Abacha, IBB and Obasanjo.

2. For you to say you prefer Shell to govern Nigeria to the present governors means that you have not read the document going around recently, indicating that Shell and the so called white people still run Nigeria. The white people have not left, and they don't want China and Russia to come to Nigeria and dilute their power

strangerf:


When white people were leaving Nigeria, the infrastructures they left us with were of great quality; compare the state of those infrastructures now vs. during colonial era.

I would rather have the management/BOT of shell manage our assets and resources the way they manage shell. I tell you, if the affairs of the country were left in the hands of shell, we would, in a very short time, become a force to reckon with in the world.

1.  Has the white people left Nigeria?
2. Colonial system of administration in Nigeria was based on divide and rule. The colonial masters still divide Nigeria today in other to suck it dry. They instill ethnic violence whenever they see that Nigeria is about to recover
3. Who installed the corrupt politicians? Were they elected by the people or appointed by Shell?
4. Do you think if the Nigerian government is not corrupt Shell will still be doing business in Nigeria?
5. If the management of Shell are angels, as you claim, why are they so heartless as to pollute farming lands and fishing rivers, and leaving the people to starve?
6. Would true angels use their vehicles to convey military men to go and kill innocent villagers?
7. Which angel would go the extra length to assassinate Ken Saro Wiwa, simply because he said you can take the oil only if you don't pollute the environment?
8. If you think Shell management are angels why can't they invest a little portion of their huge profit in clearing up their mess? Are you waiting for Wikileak to tell you that Shell, Harlliburton, Siemens, Julius Berger and all the top multinationals can not do without bribing those they installed to ruin Nigeria

1. The new yam festival in most Igbo land is generally around August (few do theirs in July or early September) so it's an opportunity for the women to hold general meeting, for the various branches to report what they have been up to and to see what they can do for their community for the coming year.

2. Majority of the Igbos are Catholic, but Anglicans and traditionalists also attend. The catholic women hold their general meeting in December, their law compel them to wear the diocesan uniform (blue wrapper and white blouse in most of the Dioceses including Owerri, Orlu, Okigwe, Umuahia, Ahiara, Awka etc). However, most women prefer paying the fine for non-attendance, because the meeting does not offer them the opportunity to 'show off'.

So in essence, August meeting is tied to NEW YAM FESTIVAL or other similar festivals (Not catholic meeting).

Economics don't operate in isolation, there are so many other factors that should be considered. Two countries could print exactly the same amount of money, but the difference in effect would be huge.

1. Generally 'inflation' [/b]will be the reply from most people. But anyone who intends to analyze this question appropriately should adopt a country as a basis. Not jumping from Zimbabwe to Nigeria to USA to Britain to Eurozone.

2.  Politics (not just local but international, stronger nations and their attitude towards weaker ones)

3. What is the balance of trade in the said country?

4. Of course every country prints a little more from time to time, but how frequent and how much?

5. I can remember the oil windfall of the mid 1970s. Udoji was appointed to determine how Nigeria could use its excess money to improve civil service ([b]Udoji commission) and he recommended huge salary increase and the effect was a jump in general price level, which eventually eroded the increase in nominal wages and brought about reduction in workers’ purchasing power (though Nigeria didn't print money in this case, but there was huge injection of into the flow)

6. At the moment 1 dollar exchanges for approximately 150 naira, God forbid it that I go to the bank tomorrow and someone tells me that I have 28,000 naira to get 1 dollar, because school children are ready to outbid me. Some 18 yeras old boys willing to pay 32,000 naira to get it.

igbobuigbo:

Does anyone know that it costs about 1 naira to print 1 naira note? So there is neither a gain nor a loss per currency note printing. Unless you get a discount.

Does Nigeria have a 1 naira note? What you you mean?

Atiku doesn't understand simple English. There have been write-ups in various business journals that the cost of doing business in Nigeria is very high. So the fat-bellied Atiku quickly concluded that costs of doing business and favourable business environment means 66.67% reduction in corporation tax.  Shame on him!!

1. Roads are to a country what veins are to the human body.
2. Fuel/Petrol is to a country what blood is to a human being.
3. Electricity/Power is the heart of an economy
4. I won't say a president is to a country what brain is to human, otherwise it will seem as if Nigeria is already dead.

In terms of veins, I will say Nigeria's veins are weak,  torn here and there and not enough to supply the needed blood. Though the blood is not always available as Nigeria depends on external supply of blood. No one knows when she will be discharged from her hospital bed because the heart beat is going from bad to worse.

And then one man who has never been of any good to Nigeria wakes up one day to say he is the messiah

1. This is the worst piece of crap I have heard in recent time from Nigerian politicians. I guess tax exemption has spoilt Atiku's head, as President and Vice President are exempted from Nigeria income tax.

2. What did he achieve during his tenure as the vice president? I know he was not the president, but he was remunerated heavily, without tax.

3. I have never heard of any company complaining about 'high' corporation tax in Nigeria. Companies and business men in Nigeria generally complain about electricity, pipe-borne water, roads, security of their staff, police and touts extorting money from them (this is the kind of tax he should bring to 0%)

(NB: Poster, it is not Company Income Tax. You can call it Company Tax, or Corporate Tax, or Corporation Tax)

lol

DIFFERENT CONTEXTS
1. Something dey chook me for inside my shoe
2. That girl eye dey chook (for money)
3. Nail chook me for leg
4. That guy chook my babe (He had sex with my girlfriend)
5. Your prick dey chook me (Your manhood is touching me)
6. Why you chook hand inside my food? (Why did you dip your fingers in my food)
7. I go chook your stomach with this knife (Just run way immediately!!)

There is no English equivalent for the pidgin word CHOOK

worry246:


Also student fees will rise which will make paying difficult.
Universities in England will be able to charge tuition fees of up to £9,000 per year from 2012, as the government transfers much of the cost of courses from the state to students.

Fees will rise to £6,000, with an upper tier of £9,000  That is N2,139,890 

Fees should be payed up front for full tuition which is not refundable to prevent husslers leaving after first term to work.

This has nothing to do with foreign students. Foreign students have always paid more than £9, 000 in most cases. In fact in  some top UK universities, foreign students pay over £20,000

It was about 7 years ago in Lagos that Nigerian own military barack recorded many deaths from careless handling of ammunitions. Children, parents, friends, visitors, etc all died or got maimed in their numbers.

tensor777:

Just shut up and stop injecting your evil militant support position into this business decision. And why exactly should Nigeria continue to rely on hydrocarbons via building more thermal gas staions  when there are cheaper and more efficient alternatives.
If you want to talk about your Niger Delta struggle why not open a thread for that? MUST YOU POST INCENDIARY NONSENSE HERE?

1. Firstly, I'm not from the Niger Delta. You can check my previous contributions on other topics to have an idea of my state of origin
2. Even if I'm from the Niger Delta, I expect you to address the issue I raised not attacking Niger Delta or militant whatever
3. I made mention of gas flaring. Is it right or wrong to flair gas that can be used to solve Nigerian's power/electricity problem? (can also be sold to earn revenue)
4. Nigeria has never relied on hydrocarbon, gas, or whatever to generate electricity. It is just content with the little electricity available
5. You said storage of nuclear waste is not a problem for Nigeria because other countries don't see it as problem. Just bear in mind that those countries do not see electricity generation as a problem in the first place, even without the nuclear stuff
6. Have you asked if those countries see roads, healthcare, policing and housing as a problem?
7. I made mention of people around Jos, who are at risk from radioactive materials from disused mines. Please don't see me as a Jos militant, see me a someone who thinks our government as at today can't handle little things, so should not try handling big ones
8. Just a month ago, there was volcanic eruption in Benue state. Read up or ask people whether the government paid urgent attention to people who were affected by the eruption
9. Those countries you are thinking of, could easily evacuate people if there is nuclear incidence. Can Nigerian government do so?
10. Think of how many people have died from fire at leaking pipeline or broken-down tankers on Nigerian roads, while scooping petrol. THose countries dont have fuel queues at service stations
11. If you drive on Nigerian roads, people who die are left to rot and smell by the roadside, government and its agencies dont care. It doesnt happen in those countries
12. Nuclear energy is good, it could be the best. But just like someone mentioned earlier on this topic, it's like an exclusive luxury car, you don't buy it because you saw someone riding it in Japan. You have to take several factors into consideration, does a simple mercedes solve the problem, does Nigeria have suitable roads, are there qualified mechanics to fix it when it breaks down, will other roads users understand that it is a car and not something from the moon, etc?
13. I know we are discussing informally on this forum, but it's worth showing respect to other users. It's just an advice

blakmonsta:

@malabite

Despite all you have said, Nuclear *is* the cleanest energy source.

coal, hydro, gas, all are dangerous to the environment. Solar, wind: in several years no-one has figured out how to reliably and efficiently generate energy from these sources. Biomass is cutting edge.

Look, Nuclear is the most efficient and cleanest energy source available. THAT is a FACT that cannot be distorted. The alternatives exist, but Nuclear is the BEST way to generate energy that we have today, period.

The beef on this forum is all these idiots saying Nigeria should not go for the best because 'we are rubbish people who cannot maintain anything'. Talk about self-loathing.

I said I would support gas in the short term, but it is DANGEROUS TO THE ENVIRONMENT EVEN WHEN USED PROPERLY. The chance of a leakage accident with a nuclear plant is low compared to the certainty of what you get from GAS.

Tell me why you are against generating power through natural gas? Is is more dangerous to burn gas in open field all over Niger Delta, than to use it to generate electricity and sell the excess to other countries? The international community has cried out several times against gas flaring to stop in the Niger Delta, even a Nigerian High Court recently ruled that it is illegal to flare gas in Nigeria. It does more damage than nuclear waste and other dangers put together. Why are we wasting resources in Nigeria? If we don't need the gas why can't we leave it for the future generation? If we can't efficiently manage the resources we have given to us free of charge and in abundance by God, how can we manage the one bought from Russia?

CLEANER ENERGY!!

1. Most people who have commented on this post said Nigeria should go for nuclear power plant because it is a source of cleaner energy. And my question is 'cleaner' as compared to what? What is the other source that Nigeria is implementing that is not clean?

2. People cite examples of UK and USA, etc. Those countries have other sources of generating energy, so they can  confidently rank and compare which is clean, cleaner or cleanest.

3. The surprising thing is that Nigeria has more resources than any of those countries;
- Sunlight: If UK sees the amount of sunlight that Nigeria see, they will delete the word nuclear from their dictionary, they don't even get 20% of our sunlight. In fact it is estimated that the energy from sunlight generated from Nigeria alone can power the whole of west Africa, not minding that other African countries also have the same level of sunlight

4. Hydroelectricity: Has Nigeria ever genuinely tried the hydro source? People have mentioned China, India and Brazil on this forum, as countries implementing nuclear energy, but the truth is that those countries did not abandon hydroelectricity for the 'cleaner' nuclear alternative. In fact they are continuously building and improving the hydro sources. In our case, it's either Kanji dam hasn't got enough water or it has got too much water

5. Biomass: this source is abundant in Nigeria and it's very renewable. Has Nigeria tries it? Whosai!! Brazil, USA, Germany and other countries are leading the way here

6.  Wind: All the countries mentioned so far in this forum generate energy through wind. I understand Britain will be doubling their capacity by 2014

7. Coal: Nigeria has this in abundance, though it is the dirtiest source (but it is far cleaner than I- pass-my-neighbour). Other countries have tried it and are still using it

8. Natural Gas: This source might not be clean, but is it cleaner to flare it? 50% of gas flaring in the world is carried out in Nigeria, haba!! It is waste, it is dangerous to the environment, it is dangerous to humans

9. Nuclear: This source demands the highest level of care and skill. Nigeria hasnt been able to manage its oil. Nigeria failed woefully in managing iron ore production, ID card, election, road network, rail systems, agriculture, education, healthcare/NHIS, housing, ENERGY, administration (corruption), etc. It was reported in 2008 that more than two million people in Plateau State/ Jos who live close to the abandoned mines were/are at risk from the harmful effects of the radioactive emissions from mining fields. I dont think that is how other countries abandon their disused mining fields.

10. In conclusion, Russian should help implement Nigeria's solar energy!!!

chyz:

You must be living on Mars because the british and europeans still 100% do refer to African Nations as tribes. You seriously must be a martian for saying what you just said.

@ Chyz
Go to BBC website, listen to British politicians speak, or listen to any British person, you will never hear him/her refer to any of the Nigerian ethnic groups as tribe. There is no British-based website or forum where you can hear them use tribe for any Nigerian or British people. You can't hear English tribe, or Irish tribe, or Scotish tribe. So they know it is not right to use it for Nigerians. It's only Nigerians that refer to themselves as tribes. Read Nigerian dailies and you will see politicians use it for themselves. Listen to debates on Nigerian TV and you will hear them use tribe. Atimes someone will proudly say " I am from the Igbo tribe". wtf!! Yet you say it's the British who call Igbos tribe.

I'm not saying the British never ever used tribe for the ethnic groups in Nigeria. Of course they did, during the slave trade and prior to independence.

Yes, I agree the Europeans own the word, but they shouldnt teach Nigerians when to and when not to use it. They also own words like i.d.i.ot, s.t.u.p.i.d, l.u.n.a.t.i.c, etc. If you decide to use the words to describe yourself, don't blame the Europeans for inventing it

Why are people mentioning the Europeans here. The British know that the word tribe is derogatory, they don't use it for themselves and they stopped using it for Nigeria after independence. No British refer to any where/people in Nigeria as tribe, be it BBC or British newspaper, they always used ethnic group. It's Nigerians themselves who refer to themselves as tribes, even in national dailies and television debates.

1. The name Nigeria sounds too wayward for me. It is dull and so much connected to corruption and mismanagement. The name Naija brings everything into life. When I walk on the streets of Europe or North America and someone asks me, are you from Nigeria? I will simply say yes and walk away. But if the person uses Naija in place of Nigeria, I will not only say a resounding yes, I would spend few minutes with him, get his name and where in Naija s/he is from.

2. Perhaps the waywardness of the name Nigeria is as a result of the incidence which gave birth to it: prostitution. History teaches us that Nigeria is a term coined by a love peddler (pro.stit.ute) who was picked up by Lord Luggard on his way back from work as the administrator of a new protectorate. Imagine the scene

Lord Lugard: Darling just lie this way on the bed
Ashawo:       ok kiss me
Lord Lugard: Honey you are sweet
Ashawo:       Aah take it is easy
Lord Lugard: I've just merged two protectorate around the Niger River into one
Ashawo:       Oooohhhh!!!
Lord Lugard: Did you hear what I just said
Ashawo:       I have I have I haveee ,  heard (ecstasy)
Lord Lugard: So what name should I give it?
Ashawo: Ni , Ni,   Ni,   Nigeria
Lord Lugard: Ok, I will register the name. You can use the bathroom now if you wish to


Naija is not foreign, it is made in Naija, created in Naija by Naija for Naija people

Dora is not a fool so am sure she think before she speaks atleast.

i think pple are intentionally getting this wrong so as to tarnish the image of one of Africans most outstanding women of this generation.
Naija is not an abbreviation of Nigeria as some people are saying NIG or NG are.

she is saying since it is niether the official name or abbreviated for it should not be use in official activities

Minister of Information and Communication, Prof. Dora Akunyili, made the remarks while receiving the participants of Heir Apparent Reality Show in her office in Abuja yesterday.

Akunyili, who frowned on the continuous misrepresentation of the country's official name in place of a “corrupt” version, said: "It is very offensive to call Nigeria ‘Naija’. We are making plans to write companies to stop using the word Naija. I have heard that name Naija in adverts. I want them to go back and remove that word.

"If anybody says this is Naija, ask the person, 'Where is Naija?' We have to stop this word because it is catching up with the young. If we don't put a stop to its usage now, it will continue to project us wrongly.”

Did you read the setting under which Dora declared that the used of Naija is derogatory? A social occasion, not an official ministerial bla bla bla. How are you sure she thinks before she speak? She has even warned companies to remove Naija from their adverts. WTF!!

Dear Dora, I wouldn't want you to continue to be an enemy of progress. All I demand is an apology to all the Naija youths who are trying to build and rebrand our country, which your generation demolished. If you refuse to apologize, then with all due respect, I will say you are s.t.u.p.i.d, and idle head, and an enemy of our generation.

@Katsumoto

Think of political philosophy has being the stretch between two points. On one end, you have the far right and on the other end, you have the far left. Each nation will belong somewhere on that line depending on its welfare system, tax system and market philosophy.  If you can't say that the US is a capitalist nation, then what nation can you call a capitalist nation.

America was very buoyant under Clinton; Clinton left one of the largest surpluses in US history but America was also able to promote a lot of welfare programs under Clinton because of increased revenue from taxes both corporate and personal which were consequences of Capitalism. So the more money capitalists made, the more that was available for people on welfare.

In my opinion, giving the huge resources held by most African countries and the unpreparedness of the populace, State Capitalism would suit most African countries. The model should be quite similar to what obtains in China and Angola. However that should be a short to medium term philosophy. Natural resources get depleted and as such while an African country can start with socialist ideals it should inculcate Capitalist ideology for the long term. When resources get depleted and it does not have a free market system that promotes efficiency, innovation,and leanness, it will suffer. It can pursue one of two solutions

1. Develop a sovereign fund that will invest cash reserves in viable ventures similar to what Qatar, Libya, Saudi and other oil middle-eastern countries have done
2. Encourage innovation and efficiency similar to what obtains in China but which is being implemented wrongly. In China, employees of State parastatals are encouraged to submit patents and they get paid just for doing that. The problem with this model in China is that citizens are submitting patents that are very inferior because compensation is not on viability of patents. What should happen is that inventors should be paid a percentage of future earnings or something similar. Bottomline, there should be an incentive or motivation for people to submit good ideas and not just any idea. This compensation will spur competition and innovation.
In essence, an African country should start with the Chinese model and then transform into the model adopted by most Scandinavian countries. With the rewards of state Capitalism, the governments can proceed with welfarist programs and development of infrastructure which is lacking in most African countries. When African countries attain development levels that are similar to most European nations, then they should gradually wean their citizens of welfare. That may be difficult if they have been used to government providing everything; case in point - France.

1. In the first quote you tend to agree with my argument that each nation must  stay at the point that suits it.

2. However I have a problem with your earlier post which form the second quote above. It sounds too theoretical for me, yes such paragraphs could earn one good scores in an economics exams but it remains the problem we have with our Nigerian students and their lecturers. They teach nursery pupils about snow, even in the universities, they have summer semesters and summer exams.

3. Quite academic to cite examples of Qatar, Libya, Saudi Arabia, China, and Scandinavian countries. As we have agreed, those countries have found their position on the 'stretch between two points'. Nigeria has her own peculiarities that should lead it to her own point. Economic issues are never treated in isolation, there are other socio-political issues that should be taken into consideration. For, instance do you think any of those countries you mentioned have anything like federal character in their constitution (things in Nigeria should be done on state of origin not qualification, merit or suitability). There are so many other factors that should be consider about the inhabitants of Nigeria when talking about economic ideologies.

4. I mentioned taxation earlier in my post. Taxation works perfectly well in Britain. Take a look at the Nigeria tax laws (acts, decree, etc). They are ideal and modeled after the British one (on paper). But has it worked? There are so many other things that are ideal on paper, but when one considers the environment in which they are meant to operate, you ask our graduates (local and foreign), policy makers and professors if it's just a fairy tale

5. Nigeria was practicing the Parliamentary system of government which has worked for Britain, it didnt work for Nigeria and she changed to the Presidential system of government which is working for America. Has it worked for Nigeria? Put rigging aside, can an ordinary Nigeria vote for someone who is not from their ethnic group, if the person is the most qualified for that post?

6. Coming to the issue of USA, I'm not knowledgeable enough to say whether Clintons policies resulted in the surplus or whether the surplus was merely as a result of period in the business cycle (economic cycle). Would one blame Obama for not leaving any surplus? In any case, if USA (Clinton) taxed alot in order to increase welfare, similar to what the Scandinavian guys are doing, then it is not capitalist (at least theoretically). Because in capitalism individuals should take care of themselves according to their ability, the state has no hand in their welfare

7. My submission: Nigeria should do what works/will work for her, not what is working for Europe, or what is in the text book