₦airaland Forum

Very real.

- My Grand father used ring (oruka) to cook yam in 1990 in my presence and we ate it together

- They have fortified Goat before and Gun was shot on her but didn't die

- When I was in the world, 7 men cannot make my back touch ground and I can lift a man with just a finger.

If u don't believe in Juju then you are dumb

ABROAD HUSBAND... by Amaka Chukwunyere

It is almost that time of the year again when all our brothers return home from "the abroad". Soon, they will come from all parts of the world- America, Europe, The Philippines, Malaysia, South Africa, China, Turkey,Indonesia and even Sudan- to celebrate Christmas.

It doesn't matter where they come from, they will come with a black American accent. Even the ones that came from Sudan will come with pounds and dollars. Because the default currency for "the abroad" people is dollars. Abroad person that is spraying Cedis, is that one abroad person?

They will come to the village, and they will be at every ceremony spraying dollars and pounds. They will wear their starched laces and their original gold chains. I don't care the authentic quality of the chain, but as long as it is from 'the abroad', it is original. They will bag chieftancy titles that ends with "Ego".

They are the real MVPs. The Mr Steal-your-chic-and-convert-them-to-wife. They are always single looking for a wife at home. Yes, they are notcirculown, they come back home to marry.

You have a boyfriend who is just a civil servant. Fresh young man who is just starting life. You think you love him until your mother tells you about Emeka, the "abroad guy" that just landed in town. She reminds you about how you both used to be really close friends before he left to 'the abroad' when you were just 3 months old. Mama tells you he wants to marry you. You take a look at Emeka and you see the glory of the Lord shining around him. You admire his British-American accent and his fresh money. You think about your boyfriend- mtchew, "who young man with Dreams" epp? You suddenly start hearing the voice of the Lord telling you that Emeka the abroad guy is the right one for you. You suddenly realize that at 23 you are no longer getting any younger and you can't wait for a graduate who is just starting life.

Emeka spoils you while he is in the village. You both keep in touch as he leaves for "the abroad". You don't see him again but you still talk on phone. You are now both engaged and you are happy, you are dating a guy in Indonesia with an American accent.

Two years pass, you've seen Emeka only once. Because body no be wood, you have a side boo in your town who lubricates the engine when the oga is not around. But you are still engaged. You are getting impatient. You were 23 two years ago but now you are 35, or you feel 35. You nag, whine, write three different please-hide-my-Identity messages to "Dear Amanda". Sacrifice 2 goats as burnt offering to the Fadalurd above. After some months, your prayer is answered. He fixes a wedding date but cannot attend the wedding because of work. So you just do the wedding with his enlarged picture anyway. That picture he was wearing a suit, that one. That's the one you kiss when it's time to "kiss the bride".

After three months, no Emeka. You realize you are now a western union wife. Another series of Dear Amanda messages, burnt offerings and pastor visits, God finally touches Emeka's heart to come home. He comes home for a few months to get you pregnant and go back. When he goes back, the real Lord - not my "Fadalurd" - decides to remember you this time and release you from your misery. You somehow realize that Emeka has two beautiful children with his abroad wife of 10 years now. Your eyes will now clear.

You finally wake up, after 300 posts cursing Emeka and other men specifically, you decide to join the Association of Online Feminists of Nigeria. Dear sister, Kolewerk. You are not a feminist, you are just an aggrieved mega idiot who hates men, and that is not feminism. Receive sense in Jesus name!

Christmas is coming, if you like, follow abroad husband and go. Better ask questions and pray!!!
Have said my own.

Dear new redesigned Nigeria currencies, I don't have any problem with you.

But hear the word of the of the most high God today.

Wherever they are spending you, let me be having you in abundance to spend.

Wherever they are receiving credit alerts, let me be receiving my own.

Wherever they are using you to buy cars, let me be buying my own.

Wherever they are using you to build houses, let me be building my own.

Wherever they are using you to pay hospital bills for sicknesses and diseases, I and my families shall notbe part of it.
Divine health shall be our portion.

Dear Lord, let abundant money take my house as home to stay.

So shall it be for me and my loved ones in Jesus Christ name ���

Copied

lafayette:
Infinix Note 12 Pro 5G Review - Perfect 5G phone? Watch before you buy..

������


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=irMnSklnv9I

Price?

I need a good phone of 128gb with atleast 5000ah .

Pls recommend the best for me.

Thanks

Who is a MAN? A MAN is the most beautiful part of God's creation who starts compromising at a very tender age. He sacrifices his chocolates for his sister. He sacrifices his dreams just for the smile on his parents' face. He sacrifices his full youth for his wife and children by working late at night without complaining. He builds their future by taking loans from banks and repaying them for a lifetime. He struggles a lot and still has to bear scolding from his mother, wife and boss, Men are not usually celebrated but they are the most important part of a woman's life and women cannot do without them. Please respect every man in your life because you will never know what he has sacrificed for u. send this write up to every man to make him smile and every woman to realize his worth. Thank God I'm a Man

Happy International men's Day!!!!!

pocohantas:
With the way the UK is fast becoming the 37th state in Nigeria, I knew it was only a matter of time before Nigerians in the UK divided themselves into classes. Old UK and New UK. I came to the UK when UK was UK.

But you are right about the clothes o, thinking of it now. There are way too many UK shoppers on IG and they sell at affordable rates. Even home appliances that we only saw in movies are now everywhere - na your money kill am. Coffee makers, garment steamers, vacuum cleaners, British bread, biscuits…etc.

Anyway, I am very pro-japa, but japa with sense and some self-esteem. I do not believe any country that has much to give you, would let you into her country easily in such numbers. Even you a Nigerian would freak out if you start seeing so many Togolese and Ghanaians on the streets. So why do you think they are happy seeing you everywhere? You think they are so nice? Lol! Please have a plan and do not get sucked into a vicious cycle.

Can I copy , edit and post this on my Facebook page to advice some of my Japa friends?

Time ⏰

I got married age 25. I was an undergraduate then. Some said I was too young; but I got married because It was my time.

I had nothing. It was tough for years. Waited for four years to get a good job. It happened at my time.

A cousin of mine while I was in 100L finished from Bowen university age 22. It was his time.

He traveled to the UK age 23 and got a job. His annual remuneration as at then was 13,744,000 converted to naira. He completed his first house here in Nigeria age 27. It was his time.

We both celebrated the same age this year, same month, same day.

He isn't married yet. It is not his time.
I've never bought a block, let alone build a house. It's also not my time.

Why did I share?

So many feel bad when they see other people's life achievements.
They get worried as they see themselves as failure and unfortunate. But they don’t understand that time is a major factor in life.

When it is your time, your hard work would be rewarded. Things will fall in place and then you will achieve a whole lot bigger than your dreams and age.

They will all come easily and only then you'll understand the "The time of life".

If others get to have what you don't have; know it that, it is their time having. Yours too will come.

If you have what others don't have. It's only your time to have achieve those things too. Undoubtedly, their own time will come likewise.

What is that thing getting you so worried that you are yet to achieve that others already have?

Dear, Relax. Your time will come.

Writer �

Oluwanishola Akeju

The most bizarre story in the Bible was the account of how David sent Uriah to the war front to die, just because he wanted his wife. Uriah actually got killed and David took his wife, Bathsheba.

David married the widowed Bathsheba, but their first child died as punishment from God for David's adultery and murder of Uriah.

David repented of his sins, and Bathsheba later gave birth to Solomon.

Jesus, the son of God, came through the loins of Solomon, another reckless womanizer who married 300 wives, and had 700 concubines.

Same David was regarded as the apple of God’s eyes.

These are mysteries, aren’t they?

India claims that Rishi Sunak, the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom, is of Indian origin, as his grandparents migrated from undivided India under British rule!

Pakistan also claims that Rishi Sunak is their son, as his grandfather was born on their land!

Kenya claims that Rishi Sunak's father Yashveer Sunak was born in Kenya, they claim his origin as well.

UK says nothing needs to be said because Rishi was born in Southampton, UK so he is a Britisher!

South Africa also claims its origin, as Rishi's mother, Usha was born there!

India also claims that Rishi ji is their son-in-law as he is married to Akshata Murthy, daughter of Narayana Murthy!

USA now enters the battlefield claiming that since Akshata Murthy is a US citizen, Rishi is their son-in-law!

Moral of the story
Success has many Relatives.�

*Copied

OldSkoolHeadBoy:
Dennis Deniran should be TELEMI ?

Is actually Timi Osukoya

Where's Evangelist Niyi Adedokun?

Evangelist Ojo Ade?

Funmi Aragbaye?

Late Bayo Adegboyega?

Dunmi Olanrewaju (opelope Anointing)?

Baba Ayewa?

This man called "Telemi"? I forget his name.

Oloriburuku (unfortunate people) are of different classes and grades.

One of the most unfortunate at the top class of them are those who, because we differ with them in opinion and chose to wish our country well and say mostly positive things about it, wish bad things befall us in Nigeria so that they may rejoice and say "that serves you right".

By God and the power with which He controls the things in the worlds seen and unseen, may the bad things they wish for us go back to them in multiple folds.

Gbogbo ẹni tó ń perí wa ní'bi láìsẹ̀ láìrò, ẹkùn yóó fi ayé wọn se ilé, ìbànújé yóó fi ọ̀dẹ̀dẹ̀ wọn se ibùgbé, ìṣẹ̀dá wọn ò níí gbé ayé se'hun rere, àṣẹ!

JUST ANOTHER COMMON SENSE LECTURE.

Give N150,000 to a secondary school dropout and watch him buy a stove, a frying pan, cooking oil and other things to start Indomie business.

In just three years, the young man will have a wife, a plot of land worth N1million, a Tokunbo car, a TV, sofa, bed, etc in his one-bedroom house.

Give N1m to most university graduates and watch them buy Samsung Galaxy phones and several pairs of skinny jeans, take their numerous girlfriends out, take selfies and post them on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

In less than two years, they will be buying Indomie on credit from the secondary school dropout and paying rent or staying in their parents' house.

The question is:
DOES EDUCATION BREED WASTE, ARROGANCE, GULLIBILITY AND STUPIDITY?

Education does not necessarily breed any of the above, but it makes you look down on possibilities as "not befitting my status".

Unemployment is actually higher amongst the educated than amongst the uneducated.

The uneducated are more innovative and ready to do what the educated will refer to as "dirty, menial jobs".

And before you know it, the uneducated guy will be needing an Accountant to manage his finance books and will now employ the educated guy!

That is the reality of our society!
*My counsel...Work as if you have no certificate, remain humble...*

From Haruna Braimoh

The drive you haven't cultivated in your 20's won't come magically in your 30s or 40s. It won't. Drive has a foundation.

I am talking drive not success. Life is in stages and phases but there are certain foundational psyche that ought to be in place for blooming to be possible in later years.

Drive is a personal thing. Drive is WILL. It is a sort of personal motivation. A person without personal drive cannot be motivated nor even pushed to do the things they want to or ought to.

The best mentoring won't work with anyone who lacks that basic personal drive.

HOW TO RESPECT YOURSELF

(1) Stop looking for who is not looking for you.

(2) Stop begging.

(3) Stop saying more than is necessary.

(4) When people disrespect you, confront them immediately.

(5) Don't eat other people's food more than they eat yours.

(6) Reduce how you visit some people, especially if they don't reciprocate it.

(7) Invest in yourself. Make yourself happy.

( Stop entertaining gossip about other people.

(9) Think before you talk. 80% of how people value you is what comes out of your mouth.

(10) Always look your best. Dress the way you should be addressed.

(11) Be an achiever. Get busy with your goals.

(12) Respect your time.

(13) Don't stay in a relationship where you don't feel respected and valued. Walk away.

(14) Learn to spend money on yourself. That's how people will learn to spend on you.

(15) Be scarce sometimes.

(16) Be a giver more than a receiver.

(17) Don't go where you are not invited. And when invited don't overstay your welcome.

(18) Treat people exactly the way they deserve.

(19) Except they owe you money, two call attempts is enough. If they value you they will call you back.

(20) Be good at what you do. Be the best.

OkutaNla:
For these Nigerians to be raising alarm, then the matter don serious be dat.

Walahi

Which of the Ijoko road pls ? Cos I passed that road now and no ongoing work there, the only think they did few weeks ago was filling the potholes at Vulganizer bus stop.

BATified2023:
Togo
Osun maiduguri
South east calabar


I can’t stop laughing

Na that South East Calabar funny pass

coconutbag:
Congratulations.

Truss is 47 years old but some humans that claimed to be intelligent are in Nigeria campaigning for weak and sick grandfathers to become president in a country bedeviled by insecurity and corruption.

Yes o and some Yidiots are campaigning for a 61yrs old scammer too

I don't think we are the most criminally minded people in the world but I think we should be the most indisciplined and entitled people.

When you look at the Stats of cyber crimes globally, you will realize that we do not take the lead however, our culture of indiscipline and disorderliness has made us the perfect alibi for other criminals around the world.

I think apart from being indisciplined, we have the most unhealthy overbloated ego. This is why almost everyone feels above the law.

We are loud, noisy and braggadocios, especially in our lawlessness and indiscipline. Our poor work ethics is well documented. Many hiring managers around the world will tell you how smart and intelligent Nigerians are but come short with at work ethics.

This is why most Nigerians in Nigeria here will see sticklers to rules as wicked fellows. We are not used to doing things appropriately. We have been used to anyhowness and indulgences so much that anyone who tries to enforce basic processes is viewed as wicked. It is why we break laws easily outside the country. Many of those law breakers aren't particularly bad people. They were just poorly oriented and trained as Nigerians.

It happens here even at the family level. Some people cannot cope in their uncle and aunty's houses because of the order in those places. They're used to places where they're allowed to do anyhow. Go out when they like. Go out without anyone knowing where they went to.

There are many people I have advised to keep financial diaries in order to track where their money is going to but they always assume such is from a place of being miserly hence, unnecessary. How won't you know how your money flows out and comes in? Yet, these same Nigerians will say "I don't know how my money finishes". When it it is not Google map leading them to spend.

Ordinary stop and question by security at a building is considered insult to an average Nigerian. We don't like queues and orderliness.

People even associate discipline with stinginess. They assume if you're disciplined, you cannot be generous and kind.

Disciplined people are simply averse to waste. They're some of the most generous, considerate and kindest people.

Indiscipline and poor work ethics is written all over most of the handymen and workmen in Nigeria. They show up when they like...they hold people to Ransome. They do the work when they like. They deliver when they like.

https://www.facebook.com/1423713811/posts/pfbid0wJjhRLCUPQugpKinFdfJYfnrWFb2ptTvUgRXXxNvtxZzBHMAsW3r6kpUqNcStd1Xl/?app=fbl

Lagos is a country on its own .

Eko the heritage of the Yorubas

Beauty with brain.

mustyabang:
Commot body jor , focus on armed robbery, kidnapping and incessant extortion of motorists, thank you.

And you are dumb to know that this car can be used for Armed robbery a d Kidnapping?

Do u not take any risk whatsoever, you can be sacked in any of the companies, go for the permanent job plan ur life with if by have a good savings.