₦airaland Forum

Hookup business.

You can send me her number if her yansh is HUUUGE. I'll be her first customer.

We have to buy Naija to save the Naira.

Cooking is NOT rocket science.

A grown ADULT (regardless of gender) who cannot cook simple meals that are edible has NO character to speak of.

Character is not only how you deal with people with respect and decorum. It also entails being a RESPONSIBLE adult.

An adult who CANNOT cook is an irresponsible adult. Such a person cannot flex on character.

They acted like Rambo when it happened it Delta.

They acted like Commando when it happened in Abia.

It has happened in Sokoto, let's see how they'll act.

NOTHING is more amazing than 2 or more different people that look EXACTLY the same.

Nothing is more LAUGHABLE than a set of twins that look nothing alike. Like WTF?

You do NOT understand what you are talking about.

First of all, NO country will be overtly aggressive with a country with nuclear weapon. Not even the US.

Secondly, NO country in the world will ever launch a direct attack on the US in the next 100 years. Even if the US becomes so woke their President is an aging chinhuahua.

Maybe the guy converted a bicycle into a motorcycle.

Because IF the message in the article is true, it would be the DUMBEST invention ever!

He LITERALLY built a LESS EFFICIENT bike. Imagine a vehicle that has an engine and a fuel tank to supply power. But a RETARDED boy added a manual bicycle pedal to it and calls it an invention.

Utter MADNESS!

Trump's mentor.

Nigerian girls are ESPECIALLY stupid when it comes to pastors and imams (ALL scammers, by the way).

You will see a GROWN woman acting like a COMPLETE fool in the presence of ORDINARY student pastors.

First thing as a man who wants a serious relationship with a Nigerian girl (a STUPID thing to do, by the way) is to REMOVE her from whichever church she attends.

This guy should be SMACKED on his bald head with a 2 by 2 ANYTIME he talks or tweets.

SUPREMELY useless individual!

I have ZERO sympathy for any political party and their properties.

The moment you hear "my past is my past", just know you are talking to a woman whose pussy has seen MORE traffic than Lagos-Ibadan Expressway.

First part of the headline made me think they were talking about Tinubu.

I will NOT comment on the ARTIFICIAL radiance of the woman.

But I am SHOCKED that fhis GARBLED NONSENSE was written by a "seasoned journalist".

The MOST EVIL people in the world are those who hurt CHILDREN.

Imagine the INNOCENT kid asking her parents why she's still dealing with the same issue after being " healed" by God.

It's PURE WICKEDNESS!

FAKE miraclemongers should be ALL be arrested and prosecuted for FRAUD.

Zonefree:
I'm not the cause of your frustration!

When someone corrects your stupidity, you say "THANK YOU".

Got it?

Zonefree:
You literally said he should stop all these foods;

-bread
-eba
-cake
-meat pie
-rice
-meat
-fish
-egg
-ALL soft drinks
- anything with the NONSENSE flour that's everywhere.


Which food come remain for him to eat again?
Why not advise him to turn to vegetarian than wasting your time typing long epistle?

You make your argument from a place of EXTREME IGNORANCE and UTTER STUPIDITY.

The guy who claims piles wants to KILL him before his time understands what he's going through and would have ZERO problem following my recommendations.

YET you choose to advertise your LOW IQ by posting SENSELESS comments.

ANY food on that list can result in either of 2 scenarios:

1. Constipation that results in HARD stools that'll irritate his intestines and cause him to shiiit BLOOD.

2. Constipation rhat results in stools so HARD, he'd shiit out his actual INTESTINES.

While your overall stance is PURE stupidity, you are not wrong about OP adopting a VEGETARIAN diet.

He needs to abandon MOST food and stick to fruits and vegetables, especially green leafy vegetables.

It doesn't take much to NOT be stupid, you just have to KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT when you have ZERO idea about what is being discussed.

Zonefree:
Just tell him to stop feeding.

You need to SHUT UP!

Someone is in AGONY because of hemorrhoids and I pointed out some food in his diet that are actively COMPOUNDING his pain and creating MORE problems for him and this is the STUPID retort you came up with?

Do you know what piles/hemorrhoid is and how diets factor into it?

Very FOOLISH comment!

Next time you want to quote me, DON'T!

mbaise1000:
You are healed ALREADY, I have proof.
Just start thanking Jesus ALREADY

MAD man!

OP, go see a doctor.

If the hemorrhoid has not progressed beyond a manageable stage, the doctor will recommend drugs to manage it. Otherwise, it may require surgery.

Meantime, follow this guide:

1. Drink a LOT of water. Always have a bottle of water with you and sip as FREQUENTLY as possible.

2. STOP eating bread, eba, cake, meat pie and anything with the NONSENSE flour that's everywhere.

3. STOP eating rice.

4. STOP eating meat/fish/egg.

5. STOP eating fried foods.

6. STOP drinking alcohol.

7. STOP smoking.

8. STOP drinking ALL soft drinks. Any drink other than water is your ENEMY.

9. EAT food rich in FIBRE like banana, apples, watermelons, etc.

10. Get a small paint rubber for SITZ BATHS.
Sitz baths is a fancy name for adding disinfectants like Dettol to hot water and sitting over it to let the STEAM hit the hemorrhoid.


Finally, see a doctor ASAP!

Fake pastor DOESN'T understand the religion scam very well.

The goal is to keep your LIES, FRAUDS and FAKE MIRACLES within the sheeples you've BRAINWASHED in your place of busines, aka church.

Don't try to do "miracles" outside of your comfort zone.
Don't call people out when they question your "miracles".
Most importantly, NEVER sue anyone who questions your "miracles". Just declare them "enemy of the church" and have your followers harass them.

When they invite you for crusades, only claim to do "miracles" like healing toothaches or shortsightedness that CANNOT be verified before you run away.

Guy needs tutorials from Oyakhilome.

It DOESN'T matter where in the world, a gathering of religious people is a gathering of the DUMBEST people in that society.

Get yourself to a hospital!

Could be diabetes. Or a number of other things.

Go to a hospital.

I have ZERO love and respect for ANY arm of the Nigerian Military...

But this is a good move by the Nigerian Airforce.

Secondary school kids are like CASHCOWS to bandits and terrorists.

Good for them.

No time to be saddled with an unserious country that would DRAG YOU DOWN.

1. Take LONG walks.

2. Do bodyweight exercises like pushups and squats EVERYDAY.

ALWAYS increase the number of reps you do everyday. For instance, if you do 20 pushups today; do 25 tomorrow.

That'll not only help you get stronger/healthier, but also TRICK your brain into thinking that you are making progress which will go a long in combating your depression.

3. Lift weights if possible.

4. If you're jobless, continue to take steps to change that. Apply for jobs EVERYDAY. Maybe 10/day to start with.

5. Learn a NEW skill.

People will tell you it costs money to learn a skill. But that's NOT always true. You could learn COPYWRITING right here on Nairaland with nothing but your phone and some commitment.

6. Finally, go out and talk to people. A simple exchange of greeting is good enough. Just make sure you interact with other people.

Marriage has LOST its meaning COMPLETELY!

NOBODY, especially men, should be getting married in the 21st century.

Just go with the flow and discharge IMMEDIATELY your partner starts acting up.

Let me tell you a quick story:

I was on Codedruns looking for something to complement my dinner.

I saw a fair girl with fine face and a yansh like Kilimanjaro. Clicked on her profile and confirmed she's real.

Clicked on the reviews on her profile just to see some feedbacks. One of the reviews was NEGATIVE from a guy who booked her from another state.

The guy booked a room and the girl travelled and lodged there. Apparently the guy was busy the day she arrived and could only make it to the hotel in the morning of the next day.

Met in the morning. Guy rushed in and rushed out.

Apparently what the guy was "busy" with was his wedding preparation. The morning he met up with her at the hotel was his WEDDING DAY.

And the reason for his negative review was that the lady left before he could RETURN in the evening to continue their romping session.



Girl replied to the review that the guy should NEVER contact him in his life.

Anyway, the point is an idiot went to Bleep a strange woman on the day he was supposed to get married to the "love of his life" and we have all heard of women who have goodbye sex with their exes before their wedding. With some of these resulting in pregnancies where the new husbands have to raise BASTARDS.

The point is getting married today is POINTLESS!

It's INSANE!

The rise of SINGLE MOTHERS will make you think CONDOM is more EXPENSIVE than diamond.

You will see a 21-year old girl with a 6-year old child. You can HARDLY find a 25-year old that doesn't have a child in Nigeria.

Some of them will ABANDON their kids with their own parents and marry a man WITHOUT telling him that they already have a child.

By the way, NOTHING screams "I am SUPER dumb" like being a single mother.

This is the 21st century and there is an EMBARRASSMENT of options when it comes to contraceptives and birth control. YET a small IDIOT girl will still get pregnant and turn to an emergency motivational speaker.

My ULTIMATE advice for men today is to NEVER get married. But if you must, make sure she's a VIRGIN!

Don't believe ANY story of "I'm a virgin but I lost my hymen jumping over a gutter" because the gutter is DICKS.

greenermodels:
the sponsor is also a Fulani called Ali and was among those that ran away. Awka hosts the biggest cattle market in the state which also serves the neighbouring Enugu state so it plays to a large number of Fulani herdsmen and northerners.

"The duo further identified their gang leader as Ali, whom, they said, led that operation, but is still currently on the run."

Don't be DAFT!

Sponsor is different from gang leader. This is why reading comprehension is a primary school exercise.

I don't have too much problem with the people dropping their account details. With the level of HARDSHIP in Nigeria, Nigerians would drop account details even if the person doing the giveaway is SATAN himself.

The REAL problem is that a kidnapper is so BRAZEN to have a social media accounts to the extent of doing giveaways for engagements.

A kidnapper with a PUBLIC RELATIONS department.

Yet the MULTITUDES of security agencies we have in Nigeria have NOT apprehended them like the criminals they are.

But they are eager to HARASS civilians and UNARMED people. Very USELESS pepple!

I keep saying it that bandits, terrorists, kidnappers and UGMs are NOT some sophisticated or organised criminals. Our politicians and security agencies just treat them with kid's gloves.

BEWARE!!!

ANY job posting that specifically requests ONLY female candidates is either a RAPIST or a RITUALIST.

No two ways about it.

...they also made a shocking revelation that they were being sponsored by a very influential man in Awka, whom they said provides guns and bullets for them and sends them on operations.

Big IF true!