₦airaland Forum

@ Larrybabe.

Thanks for the support, big ups!

I saw the advert yesterday night and i feel it is cool, kind of trying to introduce Gulder Ultimate Search IV, the white helpless guys in a place that looked like a Refinery/Gas plant that was gutted by fire, not even the fire extinguisher could put out the fire.

Then came 5 hefty looking men that landed at the site with a helicopter to put out the fire with little or no help of the fire extinguisher but their physical strenghth and ability.

The advert was portraying Black as being Bold, Beautiful and Courageous.

The white guys were really amazed, the look they had on their faces were like, " where are these guys from".

A must watch i tell you.

A new sign in the Bank Lobby read:

"Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles.
Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts.

After months of careful research. MALE & FEMALE procedures have been developed. Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender."

MALE PROCEDURE:

1. Drive up to the cash machine.

2. Put down your car window.

3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.

4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.

5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt

6. Put window up.

7. Drive off.

***********************************

FEMALE PROCEDURE:

Unfortunately, most of this part is the truth.!!!!

1. Drive up to cash machine.

2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.

3. Set parking brake, put the window down.

4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.

5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up.

6. Attempt to insert card into machine.

7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excesssive distance from the car.

8. Insert card.

9. Re-insert card the right way.

10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.

11. Enter PIN

12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.

13. Enter amount of cash required.

14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.

15. retrieve cash and receipt.

16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside .

17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of chequebook.

18. Re-check makeup

19. Drive forward 2 feet.

20. Reverse back to cash machine.

21. Retrieve card.

22. Re-empty handbag, locate card holder and place card into the slot provided.

23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.

24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.

25. Redial person on cell phone.

26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.

27. Release parking brake.

ladebi:
Whats up with the four kids?What about Victoria Beckham?

My dear wisen up, dont be dumb we are celebrating Niger here and not England or America, any Niger woman that is still pretty after 4 kids and is also a celebrity ( well Known ) why not name them lets give it up to them. ,

For your information, this thread is specifically for her (Omotola) that is why her beauty is mentioned, it is not as if having 4 kids and remaining beautiful is a big deal ok! get that into your thick skulls.

vivi:
y da hell do u people have 2 keep mentioning tat she has 4 kids.
she has 4 kids n so what?? she is not the only 1 tat has maintained her figure after givin birth 2 4 kids.
is it tat she dose nt look tat pretty when u see her as a normal person or what?
i know she has 4 kids n so does evry other person on the damn planet.
so shut up about it.

Whats your stress? she has 4 kids and is still sexy, every reason to make noise about especially because i am one of her fan and if u are not too bad, your luck. allow member that love and appreciate her to celebrate her beauty ok! no fuss.

blue-sky:
ne1 got pictures

This one is for u.

This is good, but the heading should be How to treat your woman not "feel", good work though.

But i like nos 2, 4, 5, 8, 12, 15, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 30, 34, 38, 40, 41, 46, 47, 49 and 50. more.

If guys should do this, women wont have cause to nag or worry.

Guys and Gals have you seen the billboard? What do you think? Well I think she is really beautiful considering the fact that she has four kids. Each time I see any of the billboard, I can't help but steal a glance.

Please i implore every member of Nairaland to pray for this woman, She used to be the role model of most ladies but today she is a shadow of her old self.

Let nobody criticise her plsssssssssssssssssssss.

You name it Isolation, Depression, Exceeses, she has gone through it.

osereka:
ol boy this same story was printed here under the caption: WANT A DIVOURCE READ THIS.
I BEG MODERATOR CHECK UR POST BEFOR SENDING IT TO US

Seun pls do something about this kind of multiple topic or posting, as a memeber post a topic let there be a kind of blockage preventing the post and a sign indicating that particular topic has once been posted. Sometimes 2 or more members may get their jokes from a particular source not knowing member "A" has posted initially with a twisted heading but same topic.

@ Hollar4u

I have seen this joke before, sometimes i wonder why people do not read the jokes column before posting what other people have posted.

Please se http/www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-47792.0.html

@ Vigasimple

I really do feel you.

Well i agree with WebMonk Compactibility/Communication:

1. If u are not compactible, natural attraction will never work.
2. There has to be good communication for the marriage to really work. Take for instance a couple that hardly speaks to one another? or finds it hard to ask for something from one another.
3. The cooking aspect is still mild cos she could easily get somebody to teach her to cook, really cooking is no big deal, its all about interest.
4. Good Love-making - Well if the attraction is there, one can easily tolerate, most men do not even like their partners to be wild in bed, they easily deduce that she has had a lot of partners in the past to make her a wild-cat in bed, they prefer to be the one to teach their wife how they want it. If u really love ur partner, mere cuddling could be very interesting, thats my opinion, i do not know about yours.

You are simply too much i just love You Oooooops! Your jokes. Keep it real.

Lately, i have had cause to be in discussions where issues pertaining to women and marriage are being discussed, some say the most important Factor in a marriage or relationship is for the woman to be a good cook while some say she has to be good in bed, some also say both and more. But the truth of the matter is that a woman cannot be all that and more, she could be this and be lacking in some other areas.

This question goes especially to the guys because i have heard them complain on this forum "She can't cook, should i go ahead and marry her or She is not good in bed and so on, " really what is it you require from your woman in a relationship? I want us to be frank in our responses because it could help a whole lot of other married couples.

I love them both but can somebody tell me the meaning of "HYPERTECH NIGGER" some words that Tuface uses that u cannot see in the dictionary.

richo:
hahaha the funiest part is that the two illitrates dnt even no your fightin ova them. oboi them get money oh, despite the fact that most of their concepts are copied

You are wrong u know, they are not illiterares, I think u should do proper research before u post rubbish here, if u are not their fan, what the hell are u doing here? You better are for PLAYER HATER thread so u can post whatever u need to post.

They are illiterate yet they win awards and tour other countries, You that went to school how many awards have u won for your country?

GREAT! she should have left before Jodi did.

Which of the courses are u interested in? is it the I.T literacy courses, certification or Professional courses? i 'll be waiting for your reply.

Hi! i was not around when you came, i hope u were well attended to.

I'll be seeing you around.

As per our discussion on phone my personal phone no is 08023244017 i'll be expecting your call based on your findings. Thanks.

Hi i visited the site and the whole episode summary was done in Spanish. Is there an english speaking telenovela site i could visit? I reall love the soap even more than Gardner's Daughter.

Please i need a decent 2 bedroom apartment or self contained around Okota or Isolo area, somebody help me out.

More summaries pls.

As part of our 10year anniversry celebration, we are offering scholarship for all interested candidate that may want to be I.T literate or professional.

HiiT (HANDS-ON INSTITUTUE OF INFORMATION TECHNOLOGY) is a leading I.T Institution aim at delivering result-oriented, high quality, cost effective and comprehensive IT Education and training programmes to individuals, corporate bodies, Government and others.

Since 1996, we have graduated over 15,000 students in various IT courses. Many of these graduates are today gainfully employed in top organisations within the country and beyond.

Our training methodology gives you not less than 80% practical exposure which is second to none in the industry. Our practical training is strictly one student-one-PC. Also our lectures are complimented with self-developed and clearly printed course manuals.

Our faculty is made up of competent, friendly and experienced Resource Persons that guarantees you premium Value for your Time and Money[i][/i][b][/b]. Our training centres are in learning friendly environments. Our labs and classrooms are equipped with air-conditioned and other training aids. We also have a heavy duty Standby Generator to ensure constant power supply in each centre.

For more information on the scholarship offer, visit us @ 27 Obafemi Awolowo Way Ikeja. ( After Hunger Buster eatery @ Ikeja B/Stop.) That is for the Lagos Centre.
Kano Centre: 23, Zaria Road Kano.
Or call Ndidiamaka on 08037888238 or 08023244017.

Psquare all the way!