₦airaland Forum

You may think that it’s normal for a husband and his wife to at least quarrel even though their kids are around. Well, people do it quite a lot, but how healthy is it really?

Exposing those young children to such harsh situations is really damaging, and it’s disturbing to know that parents argue, fight and quarrel even in front of their kids — it’s disturbing and should be stopped.

8 reasons why it’s unhealthy to argue and fight in front of your kids:

1. THEY HAVE THEIR OWN WAY OF THINKING

A lot of people believe it’s not too bad to quarrel in front of their kids forgetting that children don’t reason as adult — the eyes which you see things is totally different from that which they see things. They are taught in school and religious institutions to live a peaceful life devoid of violence, fighting and quarrels, only to get home and see their parents living the opposite — the tape playing in the head of that child might not be a healthy one.

2. THEY NEVER FORGET

Children never forget; you may think they have forgotten but they never forget. So many things they see or hear are usually stored up in their brain for a very long time. So imagine if they have to store up memories of their parents fighting and quarrelling.

3. THEY LEARN

The three places children pick up things easily from are school, their peers and at home, not forgetting the television as well. At that young age most of the things they learn is from the aforementioned — so imagine if all you have to show your kids are scenes of domestic violence, quarrels and hate.

4. THEY ARE TOO YOUNG FOR SUCH EMOTIONS

Research by scientists at the University of East Anglia revealed that Brain scans have found that children who experience ‘mild to moderate’ family problems up to the age of 11 suffer impaired brain development and could be at risk of psychiatric illness. So, imagine what parents put their children through; if findings from the research is anything to go by then a lot of parents are guilty of putting the mental health of their children at risk.

5. THEY MIGHT LEARN TO TAKE SIDES

Like I mentioned earlier on, children have their own way of thinking, and if all they see are parents always fond of having a go at each other, one of the parents might suffer because that child might begin to see one as evil and choose the other parent. Imagine when your kid starts hating you at that young age.

6. BUILD ANGER

Exposing your young children to scenes of violence at that young age means you are exposing them to having feelings of hate and anger from such a tender age, and this might go a long in their temperament and attitude in the future.

7. WOULD THINK IT’S OKAY TO FIGHT

Parents are probably a child’s first role model; imagine how bad a role model you would be if all you do is fight and quarrel in front of your children. The child might go on to exhibit such attitude in school, and that’s so unhealthy.

8. THEY MIGHT DISTANCE THEMSELVES

Like I mentioned earlier, children learn things quickly a lot when growing up and at that young age they have their own way of thinking. When faced with a situation where their parents are drug users, alcoholics, engage in domestic violence and the rest of it, that child might go on to build a safe place in their minds and live in it — and this could mean distancing themselves from you. Some parents don’t even spot this on time and before they know it, it’s already too late.

Parents should learn that their children are an important part of the family and how they feel at all times should be considered.