fidelity bank has started calling for test.i have never applied at fidelity,only at the fair.something from the PR FAIR afterall

@ayusman, am sorry i did not find that post funny.this is a serious domain for serious minded people looking for jobs. am sorry i think it would have been better on the jokes segment.

i wrote the test yesterday but i ran into serious problem at the last minuete when the white lady seized my answer sheet. i dont know if i was disqualified or it was shakara.what do i do? who can help cos the test wasnt bad

yeah. did u say maths? what kind of maths pls.i am weak in all these maths. gmat will be fine.pls reply if u ve gone for your test

congratulations.i am serving in kogi myself.batch b 2006.the name of the camp is asaya and it is in kabba.go in through ikare in ondo state.let me warn you,there is no toilet and limited accomodation sotry and make it the first day.make sure you join hiv or dta class if you want to avoid parade.stay in touch for info u need.last day ,dont bother to submit your mattress.

itoco, are u alright?i remember u calling for cv's months back on this forum.thats bad.get serious.this is not not the joke segment.all the best sha.

FOCUS ON YOUR VALUE
Whenever you apply for a job, think about how you can bring value to the company. In your cover letter, focus on how you plan to help the company achieve its goals - and how certain skills of yours will help accomplish those goals. In the interview process, give specific examples of how your work experience directly applies to the company values, clearly showing you're a great fit for the position.


ALWAYS FOLLOW UP
Whether you've applied for a job through Monster, have just finished a job interview or have sent an online networking invitation, always follow up. It will show that you're proactive and a true go-getter, two traits that are highly regarded in every industry. And because not everyone follows up, doing so will set you apart.


KEEP YOUR RESUME UPDATED
Because you could hear about a great job opportunity on a moment's notice, always keep your resume updated with industry buzzwords, new skills and an eye-catching headline. Then, you'll be ready to apply to any job the same day you hear about it, and get your resume into the hands of the hiring manager quickly.

This is what yahoo has to say:
Hi. This is the qmail-send program at yahoo.com.
I'm afraid I wasn't able to deliver your message to the following
addresses.
This is a permanent error; I've given up. Sorry it didn't work out.

<demolaburaimoh@nigeritelimited.com>:
213.171.216.107 does not like recipient.
Remote host said: 552 <demolaburaimoh@nigeritelimited.com>: Recipient
address rejected: Mailbox message count quota exceeded, please try again
later.
Giving up on 213.171.216.107.

my friend did the call interview too but was called for the next stage on thursday which she attended.she said they werent much , so i guess its in batches

For a couple years I've been blaming it on iron poor blood, lack of vitamins, dieting and a dozen other maladies. But now I found out the real reason.

I'm tired because I'm overworked.

The population of this country is 237 million. 104 million are retired. That leaves 133 million to do the work.

There are 85 million in school, which leave 48 million to do the work. Of this there are 29 million employed by the federal government. This leaves 19 million to do the work.

Four million are in the Armed Forces, which leaves 15 million to do the work.

Take from the total the 14,800,000 people who work for State and City Government and that leaves 200,000 to do the work. There are 188,000 in hospitals, so that leaves 12,000 to do the work.

Now, there are 11,998 people in prisons. That leaves just two people to do the work.

You and me.

And you're sitting there reading jokes on nairaland

try www.jidaw.com too. it has links to nigerian banks and insurance companys career pages

A blonde goes for a job interview in an office. The interviewer starts with the basics. "So, miss, can you tell us your age, please?"

The blonde counts carefully on her fingers for about 30 seconds before replying "Ehhhh, 22!"

The interviewer tries another straightforward one to break the ice. "And can you tell us your height, please?"

The young lady stands up and produces a measuring tape from her handbag. She then traps one end under her foot and extends the tape to the top of her head. She checks the measurement and announces "Five foot two!"

This isn't looking good so the interviewer goes for the real basics. "And, ehh, just to confirm for our records, your name please?"

The blonde bobs her head from side to side for about twenty seconds, mouthing something silently to herself, before replying "Mandy!"

The interviewer is completely baffled at this stage, so he asks "Just out of curiosity, miss. We can understand your counting on your fingers to work out your age, and the measuring tape for your height is obvious, but what were you doing when we asked you your name?"

"Ohh, that!", replies the blonde, "I was just running through 'Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, '"

A doctor started an affair with his nurse. Shortly after this started, she announced that she was pregnant.

Not wanting his wife to find out, he gave her a large amount on money and asked her to go out of the country, to Germany, to wait out her pregnancy and have the baby over there.

"But, how will you know when our baby is born?" she asked.

"Well, he said, "after you've had the baby, just send me a post card and write 'sauerkraut' on the back."

Not knowing what else to do, she took the money and went off to Germany.

Six months went by. Then one day the doctor's wife called him at the office. "Dear, you received a very strange post card in the mail today," she explained. "I don't understand what it means!"

"Just wait till I get home and I'll read it," he replied. Later that evening, the doctor came home and read his post card which read:

"SAUERKRAUT, SAUERKRAUT, SAUERKRAUT, TWO WITH WIENERS, ONE WITHOUT!!!"

diddy, you really have a problem.they havent started sending you bad mails, they will soon start appearing at your door.for gogs sake must you always have something to say.just an advice-learn to look the other way if you dont want nairalanders to post a topic about you-ma 2 cents

A Frenchman and an Italian were seated next to an Englishman on an overseas flight. After a few cocktails, the men began discussing their home lives.

"Last night I made love to my wife four times," the Frenchman bragged, "and this morning she made me delicious crepes and she told me how much she adored me."

"Ah, last night I made love to my wife six times," the Italian responded, "and this morning she made me a wonderful omelet and told me she could never love another man."

When the Englishman remained silent, the Frenchman smugly asked, "And how many times did you make love to your wife last night?"

"Once," he replied.

"Only once?" the Italian arrogantly snorted. "And what did she say to you this morning?"

"Don't stop."

A Frenchman and an Italian were seated next to an Englishman on an overseas flight. After a few cocktails, the men began discussing their home lives.

"Last night I made love to my wife four times," the Frenchman bragged, "and this morning she made me delicious crepes and she told me how much she adored me."

"Ah, last night I made love to my wife six times," the Italian responded, "and this morning she made me a wonderful omelet and told me she could never love another man."

When the Englishman remained silent, the Frenchman smugly asked, "And how many times did you make love to your wife last night?"

"Once," he replied.

"Only once?" the Italian arrogantly snorted. "And what did she say to you this morning?"

"Don't stop."

who says i cant de install wife 1.0? but i can have more than one girlfriend 7.0. amigo amigo, over .nice one femi, right a program for wife 1.0 to run smoothly

na waoooo, obj must not see this, its well past 50 years, i sure say the car never go for mot test.anyway iwant to buy , put you will pay me for helping you to dispose it.just a token 350, 000 naira

The following conversation ensued btw GOD and a lady:

Lady: can you pls change the structure of the penis ,its horrible .

God: no way ! its that horrible and u still suck it ,what if it looks better u want to chew it?





--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

An old Italian Mafia Don was dying and he called his grandson
to his bed. "Grandson I wannna you lisin to me. I want for you to
take my chrome plated 38 revolver so you will always remember me."
"But Grandpa, I really don't like guns - how about you leaving me your
Rolex watch instead?"
"You lisina to me! Someday you goina be runna the business,
you goina have a beautiful wife, lotsa money, a biga home, and maybe
a couple of bambino.
Someday you goina coma home and maybe finda your wife in bed with
another man.
What do you do then? Point to your watch and say TIMES UP?"

One day, a group of eminent scientists got
together and decided that Man had come a
long way and no longer needed God. So they
picked one of their number to go and tell Him
that they were done with Him.

The scientist walked up to God and said,
"God, we've decided that we have advanced
to the point that we no longer need you. We
can clone people and do many miraculous
things, so why don't you just retire?"

God listened very patiently, and then said,
"Very well, I will agree if you can
demonstrate your proficiency to me. Let's
have a Man-making contest."

The scientist replied, "Sounds good!" God
added, "Now, we're going to do this just like
I did back in the old days with Adam.""Of
course," said the scientist, and bent down
and grabbed himself a handful of dirt.

God just looked at him and said, "No, no,
no,
You get your OWN dirt!"

what is a miracle?


a miracle could be defined as


a dumb man telling a deaf man


that a blind man saw a crippled man


run accross the street to help


a barren woman carry her baby.

i counted three too.na waoooo.this kain tesf sef

the cat too is a nigerian civil servant

diddy4t, its obvious that you have a problem, a big one for that matter.ha ba! if you have seen it b4 nko?let others enjoy it.what on nairaland is not posted twice.u are getting on ppls nerves and you had better watched it cos some ppl will not be diplomatic, ye ye

diddy4t, its obvious that you have a problem, a big one for that matter.ha ba! if you have seen it b4 nko?let others enjoy it.what on nairaland is not posted twice.u are getting on ppls nerves and you have better watched it cos some ppl will not be diplomatic, ye ye

woooooooooow, that was indeed very clever.biggup brother, i feel like playing mega scrabble.keep it rolling.u too much

@kimba, yes my mom was posted to my father and my sis are still been posted as hotstepper is still being posted too.as long as they are females. can we conclude that all ladies are foolish, hence all ladies are posted.abegi
@hotstepper, i know how difficult it is to accept.i dey gbadun your fronting.tell us about ur posting experience

that was witty and perfect, one of the most appreciated on this forum, keep it up.pls, do u know osamas addy?we could make some money.who delivered the letter?

SORRY O, HOT STEPPER.ARE YOU NOT A LADY? SAVE US YOUR HOLY FRONTING.WE UNDERSTAND IT IS NEVER YOUR FAULT.I AGREE LADIES ARE LIKE STAMPS, THE ONLY DIFFERENCE IS THAT WHEN YOU POST A STAMP, YOU KNOW WHERE IT IS GOING BUT FOR LADIES-YOU DONT EVEN CARE, IT COULD GO ROUND THE WORLD AND COME BACK TO YOU.HOTSTEPPER, ABI?

hello everyone, na me be dis oo